HULY: I would like you all to thank Lady Insomnia's coming into this world for this chapter. It 'twas her emails and birthday that got me to update. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LI-SAN!!! (If you hold any offense to me making your name into an acronym, please beat me with a breadstick. Also, I'm not an inconsiderate person who didn't think about our different timelines. I know that this isn't your birthday now, but I want it to be your last present. And not one that's five months late, either. Otanjobi omedeto!) On a less important note, the uber-shibby coincidence of the FAKE manga, Utena anime, and Gravi book six all being made in '97 is something I find highly amusing. Now, onto the chapter!
--And You Though Living With Your Mother Was Bad--
The world fuzzes into clarity as I open my eyes to an uncaring living room. An aniki's living room, but heck. Uncaring. Aniki. Same thing, right?
Well, anyways, I'm wake up and immediately notice that I've bent and drooled on my FAKE book!
"OHMYGODNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" I yell and attempt to atone for my sins by curing the soul-broken manga.
And it works! All better. Yay!
"What the HELL are you doing NOW? Caressing a fucking BOOK?!"
I look up from my position on the couch and see Eiri; looking as disgusted and pissy and usual with a cigarette sticking out of his mouth.
"And what the hell are you doing? PMSing?"
Take that, aniki!
"...I suppose you also think Shuichi is pregnant and that Mika has wet-dreams. That is some shit of a school 'tou-san is wasting his money on."
He walks into the kitchen and I hear him open his can of 'weiser.
Maybe I should try to find his book of insults...
"Aren't you missing your flower show?"
I gasp in horror and remember the thing I shouldn't have forgotten in the first place.
"UTENA!!! SHIT!!!"
I tackle - literally - the space between me and the TV and quickly switch on the square of sodomy. (Eiri and I only use the TV for porn or something else just as good, like anime.)
"Watashi wa, sekai wo kaeru!"
Sighing with relief at the fact that I didn't miss my daily dose of homos and incest, I stare blankly and let myself be absorbed into the cryptic speech of Mikage and Mamiya.
...I suppose I should explain why the hell I'm living with Eiri in the first place.
Long story short, voodoo plus furnace equals big kaboom.
Back to what goes on now, besides the slutty sis of the man that is a girl glaring at Himemiya.
There is a yawn and a little Shuichi wrapped in nothing but a sheet walks in with half-lidded eyes, while muttering about Seguchi, daisies, and cheese.
"Ohayo, Shuichi!" I call, still mostly focussed on the screen.
"Ahustat, oyaho..." he says, speaking in the backwards language that is sleep-talking.
"Hey, Shuichi!" calls Eiri from the kitchen. "Why don't you put some friggin clothes on?"
"Etihsuod? Ustanp...?"
"Because my brother is over and he's a horny teenage who fangirls around hit band members."
Shuichi shuffles back into the bedroom and shuts the door.
"Poor boy suffers from pink hair syndrome." I remark smartly! 8D
"Riiiight." So much sarcasm drips from my aniki's voice, that I could drown in it like a drunk in his soup.
"Ne, ne, Yuki!" Shuichi squeals really loud-like. "I'm gonna go to work now! Sakano'll pick me up a creezint or something, so I don't ne--"
"CROISSANT, you mongoloid." Eiri yells, sounding annoyed again. As usual. Like always. "CROISSANT. It's French."
"...Okay! Well, uh... I'm gonna go now!"
He pauses.
I don't care. I'm watching Kozue get PANTS. PANTS!!!
"I said, I'M GONNA GO NOW!!" Shuichi says again, hoping that aniki will burst out and give him an early morning make-out session.
"Good fucking riddance." Eiri stomps out of the kitchen and points to the door with the hand not holding a can of beer. "Now get the hell outta my house."
"FINE!!! I Mika-san comes over, cuts off your balls, and feeds them to Seguchi's tarantulas while I'm gone!"
All three of us wince at that really graphic picture.
"Ugh. You make me sick. I'm going to go die now." Eiri groans and walks into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. "I'll see you when you get home."
"Okay! SEE YA LATER, YUKI!!!"
The strawberry bitch nuisance skips out of the house merrily.
Waiting for the magical words "Zettai Unmei Mokushiroku," I watch through the preview of the next episode.
"What the fuck?"
Nanami gets a cowbell?
What IS a cowbell?
Not enough time. I have to get to NG or else I won't be able to see enough of the beautiful one!
Stepping into my shoes, I call, "Aniki! I'm going out! I'll be back later!"
"I'm a bit too busy barfing to really give a shit."
"Cool. Ja!"
--
Stealthily, the handsome spy-agent-dude Double Oh Fuck Me trails his evil brother's really-annoying-yet-somewhat-attractive-assistant-slash-piece-of-ass, Shindou Shuichi, in order to find the much-more-attractive-and-extremely-attractive-guitarist-slash-person-who-will-soon-be-his, Nakano Hiroshi.
Yeah. I'm following Shuichi to work so I can watch Hiro. I've done ever since the second day I lived with aniki and it's fun.
I use the ID Seguchi gave me, show it to the receptionist, and just sit in the hallways reading FAKE and just listen to his guitar and voice and watch him as he walks by. It's really awesome.
So, anyways, I go in and show the lady my card. She smiles and nods for me to go in.
God, I hate it when people like that smile. I just want to SQUISH THEM!!! Like bugs and Tohma.
As I walk up the steps to the fifth floor where my lovely awaits me, I get the feeling I'm being followed.
I turn around, and there are two security guards.
Fuck...
"Look, kid!" calls the pudgier one. "We don't wanna hurt you, but we've noticed that you've been following Shindou-san around."
"Shuichi?" I ask.
"Yeah." he says, approaching me cautiously. "Now, we don't want any trouble, but it'd make alotta people more comfortable if you weren't around so much."
"You think I'm stalking SHUICHI?"
"No. Of course we don't." the second one says, also slowly walking up the stairs. "It's just that you're scaring some of the people who work here. Now, if you'd just please leave with us calmly and carefully..."
Leave equals not see Hiroshi.
Not see Hiroshi equals miss opportunity to go out with him.
Miss opportunity to go out with him equals die lonely and being dominated in last round of sexual intercourse.
Solution? RUN FOR YOUR LIFE AS THE MASTER SEME!!!
So I make a break for the closest door, and the doughnut OD-ing dude who aren't protecting diddly-shit run after me as fast as their fat little legs will carry them.
Running in the hallway of Godknows which floor, I curse my rotten, stinking, filthy, horrid, evil, bad, bad, no good, shit luck.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fu----" I stop my muttering of my favorite obscenity as I crash into something.
Someone.
Who really cares?
"Oh, shit. I'm so sorry." I hear a very sexy voice say. "Oh! You're... Yuki-san's brother, right? Tatsuha-kun?"
That scent! That voice! That aura! Could it be...?
I look up into the face of Nakano Hiroshi, and the angels sing.
-Bwa ha ha.-
HULY: Urm... I hope you enjoyed it and whatnot, but I still want you all to wish LI-san a happy belated birthday and read her fics. And go to her MSN group!
http:groups. msn .com / Gravitation---feelthepull (--Remove spaces, of course)
It'll be a really cool Tatsuha/Hiroshi page when more people get into it. So go on and join, my little lovelies!
--And You Though Living With Your Mother Was Bad--
The world fuzzes into clarity as I open my eyes to an uncaring living room. An aniki's living room, but heck. Uncaring. Aniki. Same thing, right?
Well, anyways, I'm wake up and immediately notice that I've bent and drooled on my FAKE book!
"OHMYGODNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" I yell and attempt to atone for my sins by curing the soul-broken manga.
And it works! All better. Yay!
"What the HELL are you doing NOW? Caressing a fucking BOOK?!"
I look up from my position on the couch and see Eiri; looking as disgusted and pissy and usual with a cigarette sticking out of his mouth.
"And what the hell are you doing? PMSing?"
Take that, aniki!
"...I suppose you also think Shuichi is pregnant and that Mika has wet-dreams. That is some shit of a school 'tou-san is wasting his money on."
He walks into the kitchen and I hear him open his can of 'weiser.
Maybe I should try to find his book of insults...
"Aren't you missing your flower show?"
I gasp in horror and remember the thing I shouldn't have forgotten in the first place.
"UTENA!!! SHIT!!!"
I tackle - literally - the space between me and the TV and quickly switch on the square of sodomy. (Eiri and I only use the TV for porn or something else just as good, like anime.)
"Watashi wa, sekai wo kaeru!"
Sighing with relief at the fact that I didn't miss my daily dose of homos and incest, I stare blankly and let myself be absorbed into the cryptic speech of Mikage and Mamiya.
...I suppose I should explain why the hell I'm living with Eiri in the first place.
Long story short, voodoo plus furnace equals big kaboom.
Back to what goes on now, besides the slutty sis of the man that is a girl glaring at Himemiya.
There is a yawn and a little Shuichi wrapped in nothing but a sheet walks in with half-lidded eyes, while muttering about Seguchi, daisies, and cheese.
"Ohayo, Shuichi!" I call, still mostly focussed on the screen.
"Ahustat, oyaho..." he says, speaking in the backwards language that is sleep-talking.
"Hey, Shuichi!" calls Eiri from the kitchen. "Why don't you put some friggin clothes on?"
"Etihsuod? Ustanp...?"
"Because my brother is over and he's a horny teenage who fangirls around hit band members."
Shuichi shuffles back into the bedroom and shuts the door.
"Poor boy suffers from pink hair syndrome." I remark smartly! 8D
"Riiiight." So much sarcasm drips from my aniki's voice, that I could drown in it like a drunk in his soup.
"Ne, ne, Yuki!" Shuichi squeals really loud-like. "I'm gonna go to work now! Sakano'll pick me up a creezint or something, so I don't ne--"
"CROISSANT, you mongoloid." Eiri yells, sounding annoyed again. As usual. Like always. "CROISSANT. It's French."
"...Okay! Well, uh... I'm gonna go now!"
He pauses.
I don't care. I'm watching Kozue get PANTS. PANTS!!!
"I said, I'M GONNA GO NOW!!" Shuichi says again, hoping that aniki will burst out and give him an early morning make-out session.
"Good fucking riddance." Eiri stomps out of the kitchen and points to the door with the hand not holding a can of beer. "Now get the hell outta my house."
"FINE!!! I Mika-san comes over, cuts off your balls, and feeds them to Seguchi's tarantulas while I'm gone!"
All three of us wince at that really graphic picture.
"Ugh. You make me sick. I'm going to go die now." Eiri groans and walks into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. "I'll see you when you get home."
"Okay! SEE YA LATER, YUKI!!!"
The strawberry bitch nuisance skips out of the house merrily.
Waiting for the magical words "Zettai Unmei Mokushiroku," I watch through the preview of the next episode.
"What the fuck?"
Nanami gets a cowbell?
What IS a cowbell?
Not enough time. I have to get to NG or else I won't be able to see enough of the beautiful one!
Stepping into my shoes, I call, "Aniki! I'm going out! I'll be back later!"
"I'm a bit too busy barfing to really give a shit."
"Cool. Ja!"
--
Stealthily, the handsome spy-agent-dude Double Oh Fuck Me trails his evil brother's really-annoying-yet-somewhat-attractive-assistant-slash-piece-of-ass, Shindou Shuichi, in order to find the much-more-attractive-and-extremely-attractive-guitarist-slash-person-who-will-soon-be-his, Nakano Hiroshi.
Yeah. I'm following Shuichi to work so I can watch Hiro. I've done ever since the second day I lived with aniki and it's fun.
I use the ID Seguchi gave me, show it to the receptionist, and just sit in the hallways reading FAKE and just listen to his guitar and voice and watch him as he walks by. It's really awesome.
So, anyways, I go in and show the lady my card. She smiles and nods for me to go in.
God, I hate it when people like that smile. I just want to SQUISH THEM!!! Like bugs and Tohma.
As I walk up the steps to the fifth floor where my lovely awaits me, I get the feeling I'm being followed.
I turn around, and there are two security guards.
Fuck...
"Look, kid!" calls the pudgier one. "We don't wanna hurt you, but we've noticed that you've been following Shindou-san around."
"Shuichi?" I ask.
"Yeah." he says, approaching me cautiously. "Now, we don't want any trouble, but it'd make alotta people more comfortable if you weren't around so much."
"You think I'm stalking SHUICHI?"
"No. Of course we don't." the second one says, also slowly walking up the stairs. "It's just that you're scaring some of the people who work here. Now, if you'd just please leave with us calmly and carefully..."
Leave equals not see Hiroshi.
Not see Hiroshi equals miss opportunity to go out with him.
Miss opportunity to go out with him equals die lonely and being dominated in last round of sexual intercourse.
Solution? RUN FOR YOUR LIFE AS THE MASTER SEME!!!
So I make a break for the closest door, and the doughnut OD-ing dude who aren't protecting diddly-shit run after me as fast as their fat little legs will carry them.
Running in the hallway of Godknows which floor, I curse my rotten, stinking, filthy, horrid, evil, bad, bad, no good, shit luck.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fu----" I stop my muttering of my favorite obscenity as I crash into something.
Someone.
Who really cares?
"Oh, shit. I'm so sorry." I hear a very sexy voice say. "Oh! You're... Yuki-san's brother, right? Tatsuha-kun?"
That scent! That voice! That aura! Could it be...?
I look up into the face of Nakano Hiroshi, and the angels sing.
-Bwa ha ha.-
HULY: Urm... I hope you enjoyed it and whatnot, but I still want you all to wish LI-san a happy belated birthday and read her fics. And go to her MSN group!
http:groups. msn .com / Gravitation---feelthepull (--Remove spaces, of course)
It'll be a really cool Tatsuha/Hiroshi page when more people get into it. So go on and join, my little lovelies!