Such Great Heights
By Ayanagami
~
When you are out there on the road
For several weeks it shows
And when you scan the radio
I hope this song will guide you home
- Such Great Heights, fourth verse, by Postal Service
~
The trip to the nurses office was, well, interesting.
After Omi knocked out Ken with the transportable ball of doom, something close to hell had broken loose. The coach began swearing up and down, making even Omi shocked as kids surrounded Ken's prone, slightly twitching body. Omi blinked a few times before joining them, staring down at his handiwork. Wow. Ken was really out like a light.
And Omi, for his part, was torn between being surprised, and being amused. On one hand, he just realized that he could be rather lethal, and on the other... well, he could be rather lethal, and he'd just knocked out Ken. Score... two for the Goth! Omi briefly wondered if Ken's remarks about his doubtful masculinity counted as points, but for his own sanity and peace of mind, decided against it. That was just wrong – if he gave the Jock a point every time he stuck his foot in his mouth, then there was no way he'd win.
And what game are you playing, anyway, psycho? A part of his brain asked.
The 'psycho' part it was referring to replied, Don't ask me. : point: I'm with him.
The coach pushed through the crowding students, growling and grunting and shouting random things at the whole lot, warning them away.
"Give him room, damnit! Back away, let him breath!" The coach bellowed as he finally reached the prone Jock. "Ken! Ken wake up!"
Ken groaned, turning his head to the side. Omi didn't blame him – the coach looked like he didn't have all that great of breath. But the coach persisted, and Ken's eyes slowly opened, squinting up at the teacher.
"Ken! How many fingers am I holding up?"
"...Uh.... damn whip cream..."
Omi almost choked.
"Ken! Ken look at me now! How – many – fingers – am I holding up?"
Scowling at the coach's hand, Ken muttered, "Doesn't kick like a girl," at which Omi bristled, the rest of the class just said 'wha---?' and the coach panicked.
"Crap! He could have a concussion; Tsukiyono, this is your mess, take Hidaka down to the nurses office. And stay with him until he doesn't die!" Oh, real informative. The coach bellowed, face scrunched at Omi. Omi made a face right back, disliking the thought that he would have to spend more time than absolutely necessary with the Jock.
Resistance is futile.
Huffing, Omi kicked the other boy's side; ignoring the coach's furious reprimand he snapped at the soccer player, "Get up, dork."
Ken groaned and focused on Omi, blinking a few times. Said blond reached down to drag Ken to his feet, pulling him out of the center of the crowd – the Jock stumbled along behind him groggily, mumbling something Omi didn't really want to hear.
It was when Omi heard a thud behind him when he had a sudden epiphany; Ken wasn't going to make it to the Nurses office. Not the way he was getting there now, in any rate. Turning around, Ken was again sprawled across the floor, eyes wide and glazed, most likely seeing dancing purple unicorns and soccer balls. Omi groaned and helped the jock to his feet, then, flinging an arm around Ken's waist, and the jock's arm around his neck, assisted in his travel from point A to point C. Point B was the hallways in which Ken had fallen over again, where he sustained another head injury, and suddenly decided to get very friendly with Omi.
"Mmm..." Ken murmured into the crook of the blonde's neck as he tried to get the Jock moving again. "'Smell good..."
Ken then proceeded to nuzzle the hell out of Omi's slim neck, which sent tingles up and down the blonde's spine, making him blink, shocked, for a whole minute. When Ken's nimble fingers somehow found their way under his shirt and ghosted over his skin, though, Omi suddenly found his voice. And a good punch.
"You jerk!" Omi cried, clipping the Jock in the jaw and sending him tumbling into the lockers next to them. Oh, yes, the shocked look on the boy's face was worth the groping. Resisting the urge to stomp up to Ken and give him a good kick between the legs, he glared and threatened, "Touch me again like that and I'll chop your fingers off."
And the worst part was... I actually liked it??
"I was raised by a cup of coffee.... in Minnesota..." Ken murmured most incoherently, struggling to get up, then dropping like a weight back to the floor. "Pikachu peeked at you...."
"You... when you get incoherent, you get incoherent." Omi said, mostly to himself, as he wrenched Ken up and they continued, or, at least, Omi continued, and Ken just kept saying nonsensical things. "But you're hard to understand even when you have full control of your brain, anyway."
"Yeah... two is a funny flavor..."
Omi sighed and thought happy thoughts.
*
He stayed in the nurse's office for a long.... long.... long time. Most the time, he entertained himself by glaring at Ken, who was awake the entire time, just talkative and not making any sense. He also thought of interesting ways in which he could kill the Jock. Some of the most satisfying, though, involved things along the line of baseball bats, golf clubs, and rocket launchers. A rather funny one involved supply of Napalm, a chicken, and a lot of honey. (For those of you who don't know what Napalm is, it's an extremely flammable substance that, once it starts burning, just keeps on going.... and going... and going... I think it's made out of Styrofoam and something else.)
"Omi, Omi, Omi..." Ken sang as he lay on the infirmary bed, smiling at the blond Goth stupidly. Omi redoubled his glare and tripled the violence of his thoughts. "Omi~~~~"
"What!" Omi said, scowling.
"Why do you hate me?" If Ken hadn't been smiling so insanely huge, and if his eyes hadn't been so glazed, Omi would have been nervous. As it was, Ken looked very out of it.
"Why do I hate you?" Omi scoffed. "You're an insensitive Jock jerk with no brains and your only ambition in life is, I bet, soccer."
Ken smiled even wider at the mention of his beloved sport. "I like soccer..."
Omi groaned and banged his head against the wall he sat against.
"Omi~~~~" Ken called again.
"Whaaaaat..." Omi moaned, his eyes closed. Stupid freaking jerk didn't know when to shut up, God I hate concussions, if I could, I'd shoot them.
He was still repeating 'shoot them, shoot them, shoot them, shoot them, shoot them' in his head when he felt breath against his cheek. His eyes snapped open and Ken's teal eyes were.... like, incredibly close to his own, glazed and everything.
The Omi did something that lowered him to Ken's level for a moment. He dove to the side, crying the first thing that came to his mind, "Gun!" Hitting his head against a group of cabinets that were fastened to the wall about a foot off the floor.
The last thing he heard before passing out was "where!" and the feeling of a body on top of his.
*
"Moose, moose, I like a moose, I've never had anything quite like a moose..." Omi heard as he regained consciousness, aware that he was on the floor and someone's legs were flung over him almost carelessly. That, and the song that was currently being sung needed to be shot.
"I've had many lovers, my life has been loose, but I've never had anything quite like a moose..." Yes, shot.... multiple times, just in case it survived.
By that time, the next lyrics were drowned out in Omi's head by his brain building something that looked awfully like a bonfire and dancing around it, chanting, "Shoot it, shoot it, shoot it, shoot it, shoot it...."
And in that moment, Omi swore off Grand Theft Auto and its entertaining yet senseless violence forever. (GTA will live for all time!)
Omi groaned and curled into a ball, as if warding off evil spirits, bad singing, and atrocious lyrics that were slowly getting amusing.
That not working, his left foot lashed out and connected with something warm, most likely a body. Someone grunted, the singing stopped, and he heard a thud.
His brain took the opportunity to insert evil laughter.
*
"Omi, I didn't see you yesterday, and you weren't online." Nagi commented as he sat across from the mentally unstable blonde during lunch period.
"That's because I've gone through what old Indian tribes thought of as a boy's transition from boyhood into manhood..."
"... you had sex?"
Omi choked and fought to retain his holdings on his seat, sputtering, "No! I went through hell yesterday!"
"How so?"
He took a deep breath, retelling all of yesterday's events, ending with, "... and then I came home, finally, and Yohji was on the phone with the coast guard because he didn't know where I was."
Nagi's face was completely blank... except for the slight twitch at his mouth, threatening to make it into a grin.
"Say something," glowered Omi.
Schooling his expression and taking a moment to make sure he had full control over his voice, Nagi asked, "And what have we learned?"
Omi thought for a moment. "Next time, I'm aiming for the coach. Then running like hell." (Thanks to the reviewer who wrote what they would have done – look! Omi learned from you!)
"You do that."
Omi almost burst into tears as he cried, "And I have gym next period!"
"Maybe it won't be so bad."
"Like hell it won't! With my luck, I'll hide, and the coach will send Ken to find me, and he'll drag me into the locker room and make me change, but I won't, and then he'll chase me around and we'll end up in a compromising situation with me half naked and someone'll walk in on us and they'll start screaming and then... then... penguins will invade and demand that we cultivate millions of pecans as homage to them."
Nagi gave him a look that only screamed 'Omi, what have you been smoking?'
A/N: I want to thank everyone who's reviewed! I read them and was inspired to write the rest of this chapter! So I don't have the next chapter written out! CRAP! Also, I'm having an influx of strange humor right now, which is why I have the entire lucid Ken thing going on. Anyway, it's pretty short – I'm sorry. I might make Omi like Trance and Techno (which are my favorite genres (types of music)! "I'm a Raver, not a crazy drug addict!") But what should Ken like? Should he like music at all? Your call! Either I give credit to whoever has the most convincing argument, or whatever genre has the most votes! It doesn't matter what kind! I probably know of it.
I'm glad you all liked Ken being hit with a soccer ball! I thought it was amusing as well! Any ideas, leave them in a review! PLEASE REVIEW? And tell me your opinion on what Ken's musical preference should be!
And anyone know who does the song that goes "Paranoia, paranoia, everybody's coming to get me..."