A/N: Enjoy. (???) SORRY!
~
I try my best to leave
This all on your machine
But the persistent beat
It sounded thin upon the sending
- Such Great Heights, Fifth Verse, by Postal Service
~
There the dead cheerleader was, dead... only not so dead as she was supposed to be. Okay, that posed a problem, seeing as how she was looking a little sick... and her neck seemed to be bent a little... but, on whole, it was just a problem. See, people don't like being killed. And when you kill someone, the first rule is to make DAMN sure that they're DEAD. Otherwise, if they're not... let's just say things can get a bit messy. With a tiny, squirrel-like squeak, Omi ducked out from under Ken, who pouted at him. Then the Jock realized that Omi wasn't looking at him. Hmmm...
Curious, Ken followed Omi's line of sight... and then he saw Sara Lee. In all of her undead-pink-slut glory. Then he did a rather... strange thing to do.
"Hi, Sara! How are you?"
She turned her head slightly to look at him, a blank look in her eyes as she rasped out her answer. "Dead..."
"Oh, really? You do look a little sick..."
Shaking, Omi tugged on Ken's T-shirt, eyes locked on the cheerleader. "K-Ken..."
The brunette turned to look at him, questioning.
"Don't.... don't you remember...? We just buried Sara Lee... you even told me yourself..."
The Jock cocked his head to the side, effecting an 'innocently ignorant' look. "Oh? I don't remember saying that..."
The blond scooted back a little, heart in his stomach and throat clenching almost epileptically. ".... Well I do!!!"
Grabbing Ken's wrist, he jumped up and rushed the not-so-dead girl, knocking her to the side as he burst into the hallway. Only... now it was... his living room??
He stopped suddenly, and Ken knocked into him, sending them both to the floor. The impact stole the breath from his lungs, and made his vision swim for an instant. Then he twisted around, causing Ken to topple onto the floor from his landing on top of Omi, and stared at the... thing... filling up his living room doorway. It looked a bit like Sara Lee mated with a goat god and one of them bore an illegitimate offspring. Creepy.
"... I wish I had a peanut..." Ken muttered, looking at his shoe, not all that concerned with the Sara Goat that stood before them.
"Oh, and what would you do with a peanut?" Omi asked absentmindedly as he searched for a way around the Sara Goat.
"I'd take over the world."
"Ken, would you just shut u-"
"Hey, it's a Megacorp Vendor!" Ken exclaimed, pointing to the side. Omi started, and followed Ken's line of sight.
"Holy... holy shit..." It hit Omi, then, like a ton of well-greased penguins. "THIS IS A FUCKING DREAM!"
*
Ken blinked, his eyes wide and staring at Omi. Omi, who was panting. Omi, who had a crazy gleam in his eyes...
"Uh... no... it's not."
Omi blinked right back. They were in the library on either side of a round table, almost exactly like the beginning of his dream...
"What?"
"You... screamed, 'this is a fucking dream,' and, uh, if it is, I'm dreaming the same one." Ken explained, making careful note not to make any sharp movements.
"Uh... oh... oh, oh my fucking god... You mean I fell asleep in the library?"
"Yeah... at least, it's were you woke up... right now.. or.. well, something like that." Ken looked incredibly confused. The Goth gave him a suspicious look.
"Wait... how do I know this isn't a double dream? Where I wake up IN a dream... but I'm still dreaming...? How do I know that you won't try to molest me again, or the goat god won't try and make me eat road kill or something?"
Ken smiled nervously. "Um... because I haven't gotten hit in the head with a soccer ball recently, and I don't think there are any goat gods around at the time."
Omi swallowed. "Because you haven't gotten...?" He snatched up his backpack and bolted for the library door.
Ken remembered what happened during his concussion.
Why was this bad? Because, if he had forgotten, Omi could go on pretending like it never happened (except in certain dreams...) and everything would be okay, because Ken would never know it had happened. (Despite the fact that he accidentally copped a feel on Ken once.)
But that was all shot to HELL now. Because Ken remembered and Omi didn't know how to act about it. So he did the only thing he could think of – he went to talk to Yohji. Or, would have, if Ken hadn't followed him. His spidey-sense tingling, Omi, twisted around just in time to see a whole lot of Ken heading his way. A whole lot of Ken tripping over a skateboard that had been sent down the hall by a clumsy skater, and a whole lot of Ken stumbling into him, knocking them both into the open janitors closet, then somehow, that whole lot of Ken managed to shut the door behind them. They fell to the floor gracelessly, Omi groaning and trying to adjust his eyes to the darkness in the room. He gathered himself up, feeling around back to the door. He had reached his destination when he froze, remembering just which janitor closet they were in. The one that locked itself. The one that couldn't be opened from the inside.
In a 'holy crap, I just realized something' voice, Omi said, "We're fucked."
"I hope you don't mean that literally."
~^~
"Uh.. so... listen... I'm really sorry, you know... about... uh... mistaking you for a girl..." Yohji stuttered apologetically to his coworker. It was the first time he was finally alone with the guy, and he had jumped on the chance to make the apology – but he was having a rather hard time... what, with being ignored and all... And just the fact that he was having a hard time gave him an even harder time. He was usually pretty suave, even when making an apology, even to cold cases, like the one on his hands now. But... he was just stuttering.
"I mean... I've never done... that before... and, uh, well, I really am sorry." Another moment of silence in return and Yohji frowned. "Uh.. are you going to say anything?"
"Yes." Yohji blinked at the terse reply, but before he could inquire, he continued. "Go away."
Cocking an eyebrow, Yohji sighed, departing with a few last words. "Well, I apologized, remember."
~^~
"SOMEONE! HELLO!! ANYONE! HEEEEY!"
"No one's out there. No one can hear you."
"I can still try, though."
"Sure, and scare small animals away with the sound of your war cry."
"Hey! Say that to my face!"
"I would, but I can't see your face. Just calm down."
Someone whimpered. "I don't like small, dark places..."
"Um... you're claustrophobic?"
"....slightly."
"Er... just try and think about something else."
"Oh, sure, like what?"
"Well... do you play video games...?"
~^~
-ring-
"Hello?"
"Hey... uh... Nagi, right?"
"Yeah. Who's this?"
"It's Yohji. Uh, listen, Omi hasn't come home yet, and I was wondering when was the last time you spoke to him."
"Lunch today."
"Huh.... did he say if he was going anywhere after school?"
"No. He could be molesting Ken in a janitor closet, though."
Yohji made a muffled, choking sound on his end of the line. "Wh-wha?"
"Just a thought."
"Uh... yeah."
"I'll call if I hear from him. And don't worry – he likes vampires."
"What does that have to do with any-"
-click-
~^~
"So, anyway, I found my teddy bear in pieces and a note saying 'could be you' in the mirror."
"You're kidding!"
"Nope."
"What happened? Who did it?"
"My guess is the kid who hated my guts since preschool."
"Sheez. A third grade psychopath on the loose."
"You're telling me. I've had to deal with kids like him my entire life. It's a wonder I'm so weird."
"Yeah, I'd question anyone's sanity if their first instinct was to kick a soccer ball into another person's face."
"Okay, you know what, it was an accident, I panicked, and I kicked the ball."
"...And gave me a concussion."
"That, too. But I got a concussion later on."
"Yeah.. about that... do you.. uh.. remember..."
Uh oh... Remember what...?
"....?"
"...A song about a moose?"
Omi let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.
"Er... actually... I think I do..."
"Oh god."
They were quiet for a few moments, mulling over this new thought. Omi sniggered.
"Where did you learn a song like that about moose?"
Ken groaned, replying, "I'd rather not talk about it..."
Homing in on the direction of Ken's voice, Omi pounced, grinning. However, Ken seemed to have a lovely problem with balance – as in, oops, there he went. They clattered to the floor, rolled a few times (bringing with them more jangling doom) and came to a stop, Omi mysteriously ending up on the bottom.
"Owchie..." Ken said quietly after the noise had died down.
Exhaling, Omi managed to relax a bit. "Where'd you learn the perverted moose song?" The Goth didn't seem to mind that Ken was still lying on top of him. (Niiiice...)
Ken growled, then sighed. "My Aunt."
".... and...?" Omi prompted for more details.
"My Mother has a really... strange... sister. She's really wild and, according to my mom, doesn't stop to think of the consequences of her actions."
"So, she didn't stop to think that maybe you'd hit your head one day and start singing the song?"
"No... she got me drunk when she taught it to me."
"What!!??" Omi started, surging up and, surprise, surprise, bumped into Ken, who snorted.
"She had some old juice she never liked and wanted me to see if I wanted it. I thought it tasted pretty good so I drank that while she drank wine. We were unpacking old boxes of crap up in her attic at the time. I don't know what was in that juice, but all I can remember is her singing that song before we went up to the roof."
"So you were taught a perverted moose song by a crazy drunk chick."
"... pretty much, yeah."
"Heh. So what happened when you got up to the roof?"
".... My aunt was convinced we could fly. So we jumped off."
"Holy crap! That's one seriously crazy chick! How far up were you?"
"Um... it was an old two story house, with a third story added because of the attic. So... yeah, about three stories up."
"...what happened?"
"Um... we got stuck... in the tree."
"You got ..." Omi couldn't help himself. This was even dumber than him being stalked by a crazy third grader bent on world domination. The funny thing was, he could just picture a younger version of Ken trying to jump off a roof with some crazy twenty-year-old woman. He laughed.
"H-hey!" Ken sputtered, indignant at being laughed at. "Stop that!"
"Can't! It's too funny!" Omi giggled, feeling his whole body shake.
Ken poked the blond in the side, or as close to it as he could manage. "Stop laughing at me!"
"Make me!"
Ken froze for a moment, during which time, Omi's eyes widened, realizing the implications of...
Ken kissed him.
~^~
-ring-
"Hello; this is a recorded message in place of any real body assistance. The faculty staff isn't here at the moment, but if you select which member you have a problem with, they will reply within the month, assuming you do not threaten any physical harm against their person or the persons of their household."
Nagi sighed. Schools were getting so paranoid nowadays.
~^~
Omi was sure why he didn't try to stop it. He was quite sure he even took part in it. All he knew was that Ken had him pinned tightly against the wall, and was sitting on top of his thighs, pressing hard against him while trying to suck out his soul. Omi wasn't complaining. A little soul sucking now and then was good for people. That, and he had his hand up Ken's shirt. He didn't think he was too much into bodies, but the fact that Ken had one didn't hurt. At all.
The blond became acutely aware of how quiet the room was, aside from their heavy breathing and the sound of his heart in his ears. It was like they were the only two things in the world at the moment... that and whatever was digging into his hip at that exact time. Ken broke the kiss, tongue still touching Omi's as he withdrew, trying to catch his breath. Then, without a word, plunged back into his mission, sliding the palm up and down the top of Omi's thigh while the other kept him pinned. They broke away again, Ken nuzzling the side of his face down to his neck, latching on and sucking hard. Omi withdrew a hand from Ken's shirt and wrapped it around his shoulders, bringing him closer. Ken placed both hands on the blonde's hips, sucking harder at his neck. The Goth gasped, breathing harder as the second flew by, hooking his other arm around Ken's waist.
"What are you two doing?"
Omi started, surprised by the voice and a bright light shining into his face from the side. Ken jerked away, facing the speaker.
"Huh?"
A/N: Huh indeed! I FINISHED!!! I'M SO FREAKING HAPPY! Your reviews made it all possible. Anyway... One of you actually recognized last chapter as a dream sequence. Point for you! Some people wanted a make out session, but I'm really bad at it, and when I do write anything about sex (no matter how far from it what I write is) I turn it into a joke. With lots of stupidity. I'm good at stupidity. Um... someone asked me what the hell's Indie Rock... THANK YOU! I have no idea. Heard about it, most likely know it, but... why is it that people make so many freaking labels for music? So many new terms...
So... uh... help this moron... (me) and tell me what Indie Rock is...? Someone said Linkin Park. Okay. He'll like Linkin Park as well.
Anyway. Thanks for the wonderful, colorful opinions. You are a unique bunch, I can tell you that. And thanks for liking the Goth Omi. Isn't he lovely?
PS Sorry for the delay. Here's all my excuses – Writers block, house caught on fire, got sick, got lazy, got FFX-2. All of them are true. I'm debating which is more exciting.. getting X-2 or my house catching on fire. (don't worry, house is okay...)
MERRY LATE X-MAS!