Chapter 9: strong enough to break

Chapter summary- Ellie may not be getting over what went on with Drew as well as she thought she was.

"Ellie can I come back in now?" Sean asked as he slowly walked back down the hall. Ellie popped out the door fully dressed, "let's go to see a movie!" Ellie said in a cheery voice. Sean looked confused "you want to go out?" "Are you sure?" Ellie kissed him "of course why wouldn't I be." Sean grabbed his sweat shirt off the bed "Alright if you say so."

They get to the movie theater and they are watching the movie. Sean puts his arm around her and rubs her shoulder. "I need to go to the bathroom, Sean I will be right back." Ellie said as she ran off to the bathroom. "Its okay Ellie you can do this, he wont hurt you he said he won't hurt you." "He isn't Drew, and Drew is gone he can't hurt you anymore."

Ellie walked back into the movie theater just as the movies was ending "where the hell were you?" Sean asked kind of mad. "I was just taking a walk okay?" Ellie said afraid that this would turn into an argument. "You left me in the movie to take a walk!" "Why didn't you tell me you were going to be leaving?" Sean said really upset. Ellie got mad to "you don't control me and so you don't need to know where I am every three seconds. Ellie said and than ran away back to her house.

"Mom are you home?" Ellie managed to get out of her even though she was crying. "Eleanor is that you, what are you doing here?" Ellie's mom said sounding completely sober. "Mom I have had one really bad month." Ellie said. "I think I am going to come home." Ellie's mom hugged her, "I am so sorry I can't believe that boy abused and raped you ten feet above me head and I was to drunk to help you." They sat on the couch, "sweetie tell your mom what is wrong."

Ellie started "Me and my boyfriend Sean got in a fight and it is so stupid." "Mom I can't have him touch me without getting totally freaked out, it always reminds me of that night." Ellie cried on her moms shoulder. "Ellie, its okay you're just afraid it will go away, and what ever fight you had with Sean will blow over." "I know he cares about you because he went through all that trouble to save you." Ellie nodded her head hugged her mom and than went up to her room.

She saw her c.d. case laying there it was like it was calling Ellie's name to open it and use it. Ellie moved to it and through it across the floor. "It's not worth it she said." She wanted to crawl into her bed but it was haunted by the nightmares of what went on that night. She took her pillow and fell asleep on the floor.

Sean ran down to Ellie's house and rang the door bell, Mrs. Nash opened the door. "You must be Sean; I was wondering when I would see you." Ellie's mom said as she let him in, "It's nice to meet you Mrs. Nash, is she here I have been looking for her everywhere." Ellie's mom pointed upstairs "she's in her room."

Sean walked up stairs and down the hallway to her room and knocked on the door "Ellie are you awake?" Sean looked down on Ellie sleeping on the floor, "Hey Ellie wake up." Sean said shaking her. Ellie looked up at him "why did you come here?" Sean was hurt by that remark "Ellie please tell me what is going on with you, you totally leave me in the movie and run home." "I want to be here for you and understand what is going on with you." Ellie stood up "you'll never be able to understand what I am going through okay no one ever showed up at your house with a gun, or a knife." "You were never raped and beaten by someone you love." Ellie screamed.

"Ellie please let me help you I want to help you through this." Sean tried to comfort her. "You don't have to help me Sean, all I need you to do is leave me alone!" Ellie screamed. Sean winced at the comment and than ran out of the room. "Sean, she will come around she is over whelmed by what has gone on don't worry." Mrs. Nash said stopping him at the door. "Mrs. Nash tell her if she wants to talk I am still going to be waiting for her, just not forever." "Okay," Ellie's mom said as Sean walked out the door.

Ellie's mom went upstairs, "Ellie what is going on with you?" she said walking in on Ellie crying. "Mom I cant see him, what if it turns out like Drew I started to let my guard down and let him really into my life and no I feel to un-comfortable to be near him." Ellie said calming down. "Ellie sweet heart Sean cares about you I can tell he is still waiting for you to talk to him, but he isn't going to be there forever so you cant hold on to this feeling forever." She threw Ellie the phone "wait about 20 minuets and do what you have to." Ellie watched her mom walk out of the room and than used the phone but she didn't call Sean.

"Paige are you busy right now?" Ellie asked. "Can I come over I really need to talk to you really bad." Ellie hung up the phone and walked over to Paige's. "Hey Hun come on in, it sounded serious on the phone." Ellie sat on a couch in her living room, "How did you get over being raped." Paige looked down at her and got a worried look "I didn't get over it really just moved on but being raped stayed with me forever." "I can't get over it every time I try to something reminds me of it." Ellie said. "Ellie sweetie you can't hold back and I know where you are getting out, you are pushing Sean away." Ellie nodded and rolled her eyes, "I really like him but whenever we get close I am afraid he will hurt me." Paige knew exactly where she was coming from she called her brother "Dylan get down her I need you to drive me and my friend some where."

Ellie looked confused, "Where are we going?" Dylan walked downstairs "where do you need a ride to?" Paige whispered something to her brother "you'll find out when we get there." The car ride was short and awkward, they stop and Paige points to Sean's apartment "Talk to him, he will understand." Ellie couldn't believe she didn't see that one coming, she walked up to his door and knocked.

"I was wondering how long it would be before you came." Sean said and he let her in. "Thanks Paige he screamed out to her as he waved goodbye." Ellie was pacing back and fourth not knowing how to start the conversation. "Sean I am so sorry for before I really am I don't want to push you away its just hard for me." "Ellie I want to understand what you are going through but you need to be open with me." Sean said. "I am ready to tell you what's been going on with me Sean because I want you to understand." Ellie said. "Tell me what you need to I am all ears and I will try to help."

"I like you a lot Sean I really do and I want us to work out but its hard thinking about everything that went on with Drew." "He hurt me so bad and every time we get close his face pops up and I hold back because I am afraid of getting hurt." Sean pulled Ellie in to a hug. "Ellie listen to me, I will never hurt you because you don't deserve another bad relationship." "I want this to work out more than anything in the world." "I promise you I will never hurt you."

"Swear to me Sean because if one bad thing happens to me I am gone because I don't want to deal with this ever again." Ellie said. "Ellie I love you and I will never ever hurt you." Sean said. Ellie looked up at him "you love me?" Sean nodded "yes I do I love you." Ellie smiled "I love you to."

A/n- I don't think I am going to be able to add another chapter until after the holidays because I am going to be on vacation and than I am having family stay here with me till new year's day. I will try and finish writing one tonight if I have time.