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Beneath the surface - Chapter 5

"Jerk!" Ryan muttered as he hung up the phone. Mentally he slapped himself for calling Trey. He should have known by now that everything that involved his brother would be a mistake but still he'd done it. He'd called him even if he should have listened to that inner voice that told him that it was a stupid idea. It always ended up the same way. Fighting. And this was no different. After talking the courtesy talk Ryan had asked if his brother had any idea where his mom's whereabouts could be and that question lead to his brother blowing a fuse. Trey had told him that he, Ryan should be happy with staying at the Cohen's and stop being so nosy, butting into to other peoples lives.

When Ryan had asked with as calm tone as he could muster what was the matter with Trey he got the answer that he should be careful so he wouldn't end up in Juvie again. Ryan felt confused. Why was his brother talking like that? All he had asked for was if Trey had heard anything from their mom and this resulted in his brother calling him an ungrateful son of a bitch and that he was the one that had left them to go and live with the rich and famous. That outburst was so out of place and when Ryan had wondered if Trey was on something a fight had broke out. They had started to call each other bad names, just like the days when they were living together as a family, but those had really gone bad when Trey accused him of being the one that had left the family and that it was his fault that his mother was missing.

The conversation had ended abruptly when the words, "At least I'm not being a looser like you are," had slipped out off Ryan's mouth. Accidentally. Trey had shouted at him that he didn't have to call back again and then hung up on him.

Sitting there staring into the wall Ryan knew that what he had said was wrong. Yet he couldn't help it. There had been so many pent up feelings dwelling inside him and when Trey had acted so rude to him he had just snapped. This hurt more than he wanted to admit since even if his older brother was acting like the biggest jerk on earth and his mom was always drunk they were his family. He liked Kirsten, Sandy and Seth, even if he had never come out and told them so, however even if he lived with them they were not his family. The ones that he grew up. The Cohen's had taken him in like he was some kind of puppy that needed the love and affection, especially when his own family was giving him hell. Strangely he missed Dawn. She might not have been the best of mother's, heck she wasn't even trying to act like one but she was his flesh and blood. And so was Trey even if he didn't want to admit it.

Ryan had always been the protective one in his family. He was the one that had looked after his mother when she had passed out punch drunk on the sofa. He was the one that helped her get to bed and also placed a cool cloth on her forehead after placing a pail beside her. He was the one that made sure that they had food in the refrigerator, even if that meant he had to steal money or groceries to do so. And he was the one that always tried to listen and brighten her up when she cried over old boyfriends that had beaten her up. It was a weird situation since the roles were reversed. He was the parent and she was his child.

Trey on the other hand was the one that was always out there, trying to pick up a new deal or a new scope. He was the adventurous one and there were numbers of times when Ryan had to take care of his drunken brother who got his face smashed up after a fight. Even if Ryan wasn't exactly the best kid in the neighbourhood he was the one that always put his family in first hand and when his older brother had told him that he was the one that had left them something inside him had snapped and he was sure that if he had Trey here he would have beaten him into an bloody pulp.

"I'm such an idiot," Ryan groaned as he lay down on his bed. Today had been nothing but one giant mistake and he wished he had never woken up or that he at least gotten that damned flu bug that was torturing Seth. Then he wouldn't be fucking up everything that crossed his way, wouldn't have hurt people that meant a lot to him. He had fucked up at everything and the way he'd acted he had lost people that meant a lot to me him today. It was like he was trapped in this evil spinning circle where there were no easy way out. Closing his eyes he could feel a pounding headache inside his skull yet he couldn't rest since all the thoughts that came popping up in his head either involved his mother or Trey.

Sandy Cohen turned down the ignition key and then gathered all of his papers, tucking them safely in his briefcase. Massaging his stiff neck he walked slowly out off the car. It had been a hard day's work and the case he was working on was a tough nut to crack. He was going up for court tomorrow and if things didn't change he was afraid that he would loose the case.

When walking into the kitchen he was instantly met with a thick silence that told him that something was going on. It didn't help that Kirsten had called him at work and he had heard in her voice that there were something bothering her too. What she wouldn't reveal.

"Hey Rosa." He greeted the maid with a smile before laying his keys and briefcase on the kitchen counter. "Is dinner ready soon?" Leaning over the casserole he took in the smell. "Ah this smells good."

The older woman smiled back. "Good afternoon Mr Cohen and yes dinner should be ready in a few minutes."

"That sounds good." Sandy loosened his tie. "I'm starving." Noticing the silence in the house he asked, "Is Kirsten at home yet?"

"Yes," Rosa nodded. "Mrs Cohen is upstairs with young Mr Seth."

Sandy frowned. He thought that Seth was doing much better. "Kirsten?" he called out as he walked towards the stairs. Soon his wife appeared in the staircase with a tired expression on her face.

"Sandy can you be a bit quieter. Seth is finally asleep."

"Ok." It never ceased to amaze him the way his wife acted like their son still was three years old when he in reality was sixteen. When she had come down the stairs he hugged her from behind and then whispered in her ear, "Rough day honey?"

Kirsten, who didn't seem to be in a mood for any cuddling snarled, "What do you think with two sick teenagers in the house?"

"Two?" Sandy raised his eyebrow. "Did Ryan finally catch the flu bug too?"

"I don't know." Running a hand over her face in with a tired gesture she continued with a sigh, "Sometimes I don't understand that boy. He is acting so strange."

"Ryan is not sick then?" This was not like his wife to say something like that. Before he had a chance to ask any further what she meant she told him about her worries over Ryan.

"Sandy, do you think that he is doing drugs?" There was genuine concern in her voice as she concluded her story.

"Drugs?" That question surprised him. "No. Why would you ask something like that? Do you suspect him for that?"

" No." She shook her head, and then shrugged. "Oh I don't know. Why else do you think he would be at the mall?"

"Kirsten. We don't know for sure that he was there. So far it's only Audrey's story and we all know how reliable that bitch can be."

Kirsten had to smile. "Yeah you probably right. Audrey is the worst tattle teller there is."

"See. There you go." He did his best to calm his worried wife down. "Didn't his teacher say that he was sick to his stomach? Wasn't that why he went home?"

"Yes but…."

"Then that's probably all there is." He interrupted her with a kiss on her neck. "I think Rosa is done with the dinner now. Come on let's go and eat." Taking her hand he steered her towards the kitchen, doing his best to do a diversion to take her thoughts off Ryan and her worries.

It didn't work.

"Sandy! He didn't tell me that he was late because of a detention and he is being really secretive. I have a feeling that he is hiding something from us."

"Don't all teenage boys do that?" Sandy laughed. Seeing his wife's upset expression he cleared his throat. "Kirsten that's the age he is. He should be hiding some thing's from his parents. That's a normal thing to do."

"Seth never did that." Kirsten interrupted.

"I said that it's what normal boys do."

Kirsten slapped her husbands arm. "Sandy!"

"I know. I know that was bad." He held up a hand protectively. Feeling that he was on a non safe territory he added, "So honey if you're that worried about Ryan did you talk to him about it?"

Kirsten bit her lip. "No."

"No?" Sandy frowned. "You haven't spoken to Ryan about your worries?"

"Uh huh."

"Why?"

"Because that is just what they are. Worries." Kirsten let out her breath. "Besides he wouldn't talk to me anyway."

"Yes he would."

"No." She shook her head. "He doesn't talk to me. Ok he does talk but not about feelings. Not about thing's that are bothering him. Sometimes I think it's better if I left him alone."

Sandy couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Kirsten this is not like you to give up that easily, besides you might have one sick son out there all alone in the pool house."

"He is not sick Sandy." Kirsten sighed.

"Oh I thought you said he was?"

"Well he isn't. Ok he might be sick but not with the flu. There is something else that is bothering him and talking about it just won't get him better."

"You don't know if you don't try."

That had Kirsten blowing a fuse. "Sandy don't come and say that I don't try because I do." His wife's voice went up a knot. "Every time I try to ask him how he is doing he always turns silent and tells me that he is fine, even though I know that's nothing but a lie." She was shouting now. "I just can't seem to get him to open up. And it's not my problem. It's Ryan's"

At that last comment they all heard a cough and turning around they were met with Ryan standing there, wide-eyed with red blotchy cheeks. He fidgeted nervously. "Eh..Uh..Sorry I was just going to ask if you had any Tylenol." Both Kirsten and Sandy blushed from embarrassment. This was not a conversation that their foster son needed to hear.