A/N I am sooo sorry for not writing for so long. I'm so glad school's over. Now I can devote all my time to writing! YAY!! Oh, and this might be a little.. graphic. Turn away if you couldn't handle the TJ episode.

Chapter Eleven: Slowly Breaking

Marissa had been sitting there for a long time, her wet hair dripping onto her shoulders, her jeans and t-shirt damp from her wet skin. The liquid on the other side of the room had almost dried, but the smell was unbearable. White streaks covered her face from where she had been crying. She ran a hand over her face and tried to block out the words that were screaming in her head. Everytime she closed her eyes she could see Ryan's face. His screaming, red face. But it wasn't anger that she had seen flash before his eyes. No. It had been fear. A nameless, faceless kind of fear, the worst kind. The fear that you had failed someone. But he had it all mixed up; he hadn't failed her, she had failed him.

"You are so stupid!" she screamed to no one in particular as she flung herself from the bed. His bed. She hated it in there. But not so much as she hated herself. This was the thought racing through her brain as she stood in front of a mirror. She pushed the hair back from her face and looked at herself.

"You are disgusting. A fucking nasty spoiled bitch. That's allyou ever care about. Yourself."Marissa stood there, throwing insults at her reflection, not noticing that the door had opened.

Ryan pushed open his door slowly, looking around for Marissa.His eyes were red and he was ready to apologizewhen he heard something coming from the bathroom. The water had been turned on, which was strange, since Marissa had already taken a shower.

"Marissa?" he called, waiting for an answer that didn't come.

"Marissa." he called, louder this time, but still to no avail. He walked up to the door and tried to open it, but found it locked. His heart began to thud.

"Marissa!"he shouted, banging on the door. "Marissa if you don't open this goddamn door I'm going to break it down!" he was screaming, scared out of his mind.

"What's goin' on?" Ryan heard a sleepy voice say. He turned around and looked at Seth, who's eyes got round.

"What's wrong?" Seth asked, suddenly becoming aware of the fact that the room smelled like alcohol and Ryan was screaming at a door.

"Marissa's locked herself in the bathroom." Ryan said dully, pounding a fist on it. Suddenly, Seth watched in horror as Ryan reared back and punched the door as hard as he could, causing it to fall off of it's hinges. Ryan ignored Seth's admiring whistle as he ran in there.

"Marissa," he called, not being able to see through the steam. He reached the bathtub and almost fell in, but instead stumbled to the side and fell next to it. His heart racing, he reached in and felt a hand. Through the hot water, the hand seemed very cold. That's when his heart stopped completely.

"Seth," he yelled hoarsely, "get in here!" Ever-obedient Seth ran in and gasped at what he saw. Ryan was sitting there with Marissa's head in his hands, not being able to pull her out of the water. For a guy who had just punched open a door, this seemed like a pretty easy task until Seth noticed that Ryan was turning white. He ran to the floor next to him and grabbed Marissa out of the bathtub, relieved that she had clothes on. He wasn't relieved, however, when Ryan started giving her mouth-to-mouth, trying ot get the water out of her. She coughed once, much to the happiness of both of them, but still seemed very pale. It was then that Seth noticed a bottle on the counter above them.