Sandie: A New Start
Chapter 3
Sandie awoke the next morning to an empty apartment. Zack must've left early, she thought. Thinking about what happened yesterday, tears began to stream down her face. Her and Zack have only been together for a little over two months but their relationship was already over, because of what happened and because she wasn't over Greg or James. Zack wanted her to move in with him but she just wasn't ready for that. She thought she was in love with him but in reality, she really wasn't. Plus he wanted to raise this baby with her. Baby, she thought, there is no baby. She had lied to him just to keep him from shooting her. Of course she would have to tell him…. Eventually.
She got out of bed, wiped the tears from her face and headed for the shower. Afterwards, she got dressed, throwing on a pair of jeans and a tee. She pulled her long hair into a ponytail and slipped on a pair of heels. She walked into the kitchen and immediately pulled a bottle of wine from the refrigerator. Sure it was early but she didn't care, she poured herself a drink, then another. Several glasses later, Sandie was feeling pretty good, tipsy, but good. She searched her cupboards and fridge for something to eat and realizing she had nothing, decided to head out.
She was a bit drunk and stumbled down the steps on her way out but she didn't care. Alcohol was her way of coping with all the bad in her life, alcohol and drugs of course. Drugs. She hasn't had any since she left Greg. Going cold turkey was hard but she managed and now with everything that's been going on, she was really craving a fix. She walked down the street and headed towards her old stomping grounds. She found exactly what she was looking for and bought enough to keep her satisfied.
Afterwards, she headed to a nearby diner where she ordered herself some breakfast and coffee. While waiting for her food, she went to the restroom and locked the door behind her. She pulled out the baggie containing the white powder, poured some on the back of her hand and sniffed. She immediately felt the high and it seemed as if all her cares were melting away. One more sniff and she was good, hopefully for the rest of the day. She went back out to the booth and the smell of her food made her realize how hungry she was.
As she ate, she didn't see the man walk in and sit in the seat across from her. He watched as she ate, her beauty surrounding him, the smell of her perfume engrossing him. He became aroused and wanted to take her right there but he knew better. He cleared his throat and Sandie looked up.
"Elliot?" She was surprised to see him, it's been a while. Crap! She thought, did he see me buy those drugs? Does he know I'm using? "What are you doing here?"
Elliot Stabler eyed her before answering.
"I was in the neighborhood, saw you come in, wanted to see you," Elliot replied.
Odd that he would just be in the neighborhood, Sandie thought.
"What are you really doing here?" She asked him.
"Okay," he admitted, "I followed you from your place."
"Why?"
"Word around the precinct is you and Zack broke up."
That asshole! Thought Sandie, going around telling everyone our business.
She was angry but she knew he was upset, again, she didn't care. She refused to be controlled by him or anyone.
"And you thought that we could get back together?" Sandie asked him.
Elliot thought for a moment, then responded,
"If I wasn't back with Kathy, you know I would in a heartbeat."
"I can arrange that," Sandie told him.
Elliot looked at her quizzically.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I mean that I have the means to take her out," Sandie shrugged.
Elliot was shocked, he didn't know if she was serious or joking around. He knew that she did have means to take anyone out, to put it bluntly, but he didn't want her to get into trouble. He wanted to do everything he could to save her.
"Sandie, that's not even funny," he told her. "When we're together, it's incredible but you know how long it took me to get back with Kathy. Besides, I thought you wanted to be with that doctor?"
"You mean the one that cheated on me with my own sister?" Sandie asked.
"I didn't know that, I'm sorry," Elliot said empathetically.
Sandie knew he was right though, she wanted to be with Greg, she wanted to be with James. She was in love with both of them or so she thought. When she left for the umpteenth time, she told James she loved him. She's told him once before but deep down, she was pretty sure it was true. James was the one that was always there for her, no matter what. He was her best friend. Shit! She thought. Now she was confused, again. She never wanted to settle down with anyone more than she did with James. The only real thing holding her back was his connection to Greg. They were best friends and there was no way he would be willing to give that up. Sandie couldn't be around Greg, whenever she was, she wanted to make love to him, to party with him, to go back to her old ways. James kept her straight and sane. She always thought she was in love with Greg but in reality, she was crazy in love with James.
"I have to go," Sandie told Elliot, standing up. She threw some cash on the table, grabbed her purse and left the diner. She could've sworn that she heard him call her name but she ignored it, she only had one person on her mind right then and Elliot was not it for once.
Back at her place, Sandie threw some clothes in a bag, grabbed her purse and keys and headed out the door. She got into her car and realized that she was still a bit drunk from earlier and figured it best not to drive, so instead she made her way to the subway and got the next train to New Jersey.
She stood in front of his apartment looking up, little did she realize that he had moved. The little place that the two of them had together was no longer theirs. She didn't know until she went to knock on the door. An elderly gentleman answered.
"Can I help you?" He asked.
"I'm looking for James Wilson," Sandie said confused.
"He moved," the man said, then slammed the door shut.
Sandie stood there, mouth agape, hoping the memories of her weren't the reason he moved. She shook her head then decided she would head to the hospital, hoping that he would be at work.
By the time Sandie made her way to Princeton-Plainsboro, her buzz had worn off and she was starting to feel hungry. No time to eat, she thought. She then pushed open the doors and made her way inside. The place was bustling with people and she caught a glimpse of her sister running around directing patients and staff. She really did not want to run into her especially after what happened for fear that Lisa would have her arrested.
Making her way to the elevators, Sandie finally reached his office. The door was closed and she hoped he wasn't busy. She really needed to see him, her heart was pounding and she was sweating. Was she that anxious about seeing him or was it because she needed a fix? She straightened her hair and checked her makeup in the mirror from her compact. Taking a deep breath, she raised her fist and knocked on the door.
James sat at his desk trying to do some work. His mind was elsewhere though and no matter what he did, he couldn't get her out of his head. It wasn't that long ago when he visited her in New York, where they made love, but it feels like a lifetime ago. Since then, he's been a mess, nothing he did could get her out of his mind. He even bought a new place, the memories of her in his old place were more than he could handle. Even though Greg has been driving him completely insane, it still hasn't been enough to rid him of her thoughts. They have been through so much together and were almost married, once when she was pregnant, but the universe had different plans for them, and he almost lost her to Greg when he proposed but he knew he didn't really love her, he just wanted to keep her away from him. James rubbed his temples, he was starting to get a headache, then he heard the knock at the door.
"Come in," James called, quizzically.
Sandie opened the door and walked in. The look on James's face when he looked up and saw her was priceless. He smiled for the first time in a long time. He stood and walked towards her.
"Sandie, what are you doing here?" He asked her, wrapping his arms around her.
She hugged him back, then told him,
"I broke up with Zack and I really needed to see you."
Inside, James had a glimmer of hope, perhaps she was back to be with him for good this time. He always knew that they belonged together.
"I'm sorry to hear that," he said, even though he was actually glad.
James closed the door to his office and took Sandie by the hand, leading her to the couch where they both sat.
"I went by your place," Sandie started, "the old guy said you moved."
"Uh, yeah," James muttered, running a hand through his hair. "Bought a bigger place."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Sandie asked him.
"I'm sorry," was all that he could tell her.
"It's fine," Sandie lied. It really wasn't. She was upset that he could just leave all their memories behind but I guess it's what she got for leaving in the first place.
"So why did you come back?" James asked her, "seems to me you had a pretty good life up there."
"It wasn't all that good," Sandie replied. "Like I said, I broke up with Zack, things just weren't working out. I missed you."
James held her hand and stroked her cheek, brushing her hair out of her face. Without thinking, he kissed her. She kissed him back without hesitation. James broke off the kiss sooner than he wanted to but he was afraid that that one single kiss would lead him to do more to her than he wanted to right then. He wanted to make love to her right there but he knew better, he didn't want to risk losing her. Sandie looked at him, wondering what he was thinking. I should tell him right now, she thought, before it's too late.
"James Wilson," Sandie started, "I…."
Before she could finish, the door to the office flew open and Gregory House walked in.
"OH MY GOD!" James exclaimed, "Don't you ever knock?!"
"Didn't think you were busy," Greg mumbled. He saw Sandie and his jaw dropped. It wasn't that long ago when he visited her in New York, the two of them had made love and he tried to convince her to come with him but she was still hooked on that cop.
"What are you doing here?" he asked Sandie.
"Visiting James," came her reply.
Of course, Greg thought. She's always ran to him. Always him! Greg was angry, he never could understand what he had to do to win her back. He always thought that they were good together but he just couldn't compete with James. I'm just going to have to make her the party girl that she was, instead of this good girl, Greg concocted.
"I can come back later," Sandie said to James, breaking through Greg's thoughts.
Sandie stood to leave, despite James's begging.
"Call me," she whispered in his ear. Then she walked out the door and once again, the guys were left dumbfounded, watching her as she left.
"Agh! Why do you always do that?!" James shouted, "She was just about to tell me something important."
Greg shrugged, turned and walked out the door without ever telling him why he came in in the first place.
James stormed into Greg's office.
"You bastard!" He exclaimed. "Why do you have to make everyone around you miserable?"
"Do you really think you have a chance with her?" Greg asked. "She's with that cop."
"You idiot," James replied, "They broke up, that's why she was here."
"And you thought she wanted to get back together with you?"
"Yes. She was about to tell me when you barged in."
"You're the idiot," Greg told him. "She's playing you because that's what she does, makes you fall for her then stomps on your heart."
"You're jealous," James told him. "Jealous because she came back to me and not you."
"Yeah, that's it," Greg said sarcastically. "Well I'm not going to be the shoulder you cry on when she goes back to New York."
"Well then maybe I'll just go back with her."
"No you won't. You'll hide up in the condo crying like a little girl."
"And you think you'll swoop in to save her?"
"I just don't think you should be involved with her. She's crushed both of us and made us both miserable."
"That's what you think," James told him. "Before she left, she told me she loved me."
"Ha!" Greg scoffed, "She's said that to me and who knows how many others she's said it to."
James had enough, he turned and walked out of the office. He needed to get some air so he decided to go for a walk. He walked out of the hospital and started down the sidewalk, when he saw her sitting on a nearby bench. He walked up beside her and sat down next to her.
Sandie looked up from her phone and smiled.
"What are you doing here?" She asked him.
"I just needed a break," James told her. "What was it that you wanted to tell me?"
"Not here," Sandie told him.
She took his hand and they stood.
"Where?" James asked her.
"Can we go back to your place?" Sandie asked.
James nodded, "Just give me a minute. I'll be right back."
He disappeared back into the hospital. A few moments later he returned.
"Okay, let's go," he told her.
"This place is huge!" Sandie exclaimed when they entered the condo. "Way bigger than my place."
She stopped, turned to look at James then asked,
"Why do you need such a big place?"
James debated on whether or not to tell her the truth, he didn't want to risk losing her. But did he really have a choice?
"Greg stays here on occasion," James told her.
Sandie looked at him confused. Shrugging her shoulders she continued to explore the condo. She returned from one of the bedrooms carrying a picture frame.
"Who's this?" She asked James.
He looked at the photo. Crap! He thought. Might as well tell her.
"That's Sam, my ex-wife."
"Why do you have a picture of your ex-wife?" Sandie asked, puzzled.
"Because he's screwing her," came the reply.
Sandie and James looked up in the direction of the voice to see Greg standing there. Neither one of them heard him come in.
"What?" Sandie asked.
"Thanks a lot," James said to Greg.
"Did you really think she wasn't going to find out?" Greg retorted.
"Wait," Sandie started, "I broke up with my boyfriend, came all this way to tell you that I love you and I want to be with you, only to find out you're sleeping with your ex-wife? Why would you bring me here if that's the case?"
James was taken aback. He didn't know what to say, he really wasn't expecting Sandie to come back, let alone give up her life in New York for him. He didn't think he was going to have a chance with her and he didn't want to end up alone.
"Well?" Sandie demanded.
"I," James stuttered, "I didn't know you were going to come back. I just started seeing her. And what about you Greg?" James turned and pointed at his friend.
"What?" Greg responded, "She didn't come here to be with me."
"Why not tell her you're sleeping with her sister?"
"What?" Sandie glared at Greg. He could feel the hatred burning through him from her eyes. "You know what? Forget it. The hell with both of you!"
Sandie threw the photo on the floor, and stormed out of the condo.
"Sandie! Wait!" James called after her but it was too late. The door slammed hard, shaking the walls.
"Why the hell would you do that?" James said to Greg.
"What? Tell her the truth? What were you going to do? Break up with Sam just to be with Sandie? Then what would happen when she left again? Face it, neither one of us has a chance with her."
"You may not, but I did!" James turned and stormed out of the building, hoping to catch Sandie and make amends before it was too late.
Sandie sat at the bar, tears running down her face. She should've known that neither one of them would've waited around for her, after all it has been over two months. Both guys have moved on and she was right back where she started, with no one. She may as well head back to New York, maybe it wouldn't be too late to make things right with Zack.
She was about to get up to leave when Greg sat down beside her. He motioned for the bartender to bring him a drink and her another. The bartender did as requested and sat the drinks in front of them.
"How did you find me?" Sandie asked.
"I know all the places you go," Greg told her.
"What do you want?"
"Sorry that James was such a jerk," Greg said.
"You're a jerk too," Sandie reminded him.
"You're right. I'm sorry."
"Do you even know what you're sorry for?" Sandie asked him.
"You're right. I'm not sorry. I wasn't going to wait around for you, besides, you're the one that left me," Greg reminded her.
"I didn't come back for you," Sandie said angrily.
"Did you really think that James was going to wait for you as well? YOU left us," Greg said. "You had your chance, several times and you decided to screw us both over. Oh and Lisa told me what happened at your place, the mark on her neck. You need help, Sandie."
"I need help?" Sandie asked with tears in her eyes. She stood, hands on her hips. "I'm not the one that did everything to break us up."
"What are you talking about?" Greg asked her. "I loved you. Remember, I'm the one that proposed and you ran off and slept with my best friend, more than once may I remind you."
Greg wondered what the hell he was doing. This was his chance to win her back, turn her back into the party girl that she was but was he going to be able to break it off with her sister and return to the way he was? Now it was his turn to be confused, either continue to see Lisa and never have the chance to be with Sandie or break it off with Lisa and risk being alone if Sandie were to leave again. Afterall, Sandie did say she came back for James, not him.
"You're right," Sandie said. She sat, placing her face in her hands. Greg placed a hand on her back, trying to comfort her. They had a good run while it lasted but in reality, it was over for the both of them. She was better off making a new life for herself in New York away from the both of them.
"I'm sorry," Greg told her. Sandie looked up and wiped the tears from her eyes. She downed her drink, turned to face him and biting her lip, told him,
"You're right. I treated you both badly and I expected you both to wait for me. It wasn't fair to either of you, and now it's too late."
Sandie placed a hand on Greg's cheek and kissed his lips, for the first time, he didn't kiss her back. She then stood, placed cash on the bar, grabbed her purse and left the bar and for the first time, Greg did not follow her.
Sandie sat at the train station waiting for her train back to New York. Her old life in New Jersey was over, both men had moved on and she no longer had a reason to stay. As she sat waiting for her train, she picked up her phone and dialed Zack's number. It rang a few times then went to voicemail, she hung up, tears in her eyes. He was either busy or ignoring her calls. She was about to text him when James sat down beside her.
"What are you doing here?" Sandie asked.
"Please don't leave," James begged her.
"There's nothing more here for me," Sandie told him. "You're with someone, Greg's with someone. I don't want to be the reason you break up with her."
"But I love you," James admitted. "I have always loved you. Give me a chance to prove it."
"How?" Sandie questioned.
"Just give me some time," James urged her. "I don't know where this relationship is going but if it doesn't work out and things are really over with Zack, I will be there for you."
"James, I need you here now," explained Sandie. "I love you. I have always loved you. It's just taken me a long time to realize it. No one can replace you and what we had. You were always there for me."
James sighed. He knew she was right, he didn't love Sam, he just thought he did. He was and always will be crazy in love with Sandie. He fell for her the very first time he met her and even though they've had their ups and downs, he knew they belonged together. He hated seeing her cry and he didn't want her to leave, so he did something he knew he would regret in the long run, he decided he would end it with Sam.
"Are you sure?" Sandie asked him.
"If this is my only chance to be with you, then yes. As long as you promise me, you will not, under any circumstances, sleep with Greg."
"I promise," Sandie told him.
James wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. He only let go when the train pulled up.
"Don't go," he whispered to her.
"I have to," she told him, "only for a while. Let me know when you break it off with her, only then will I return."
Sandie kissed him, he kissed her back, then once again, he watched as she boarded the train.