I'm such a nervous wreck.
Looking at me now, you never would have thought that I have done all the things that I've done. All those missions, all those times when I was the last person standing, fighting for the safety of those I love, fighting to save the thing that protected us all, fighting to save her - never mind... I don't like to think about that too much any more.
I'm just so nervous. People keep rushing in and telling me that there's nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about?! What the hell are these people thinking? The room is really dark and kind of cluttered, but I don't know what else you might expect from a typical residence in the slums of Midgar. After all, the whole damn city is a hell hole, and the slums are the very lowest of all the levels.
I try sitting down, but my knee begins to bounce up and down. Before I know it, both my legs are jiggling and I can't stand it anymore, so I jump up and begin to pace around the room. I can tell I'm annoying the guy sitting across from me. He keeps looking at me like I'm some damn puppy that won't stop wagging its tail and go to sleep.
I look at the antique (if you can call it that... just plain 'old' might be a better adjective) clock on the wall and wonder if it's broken. I swear that every time I look at it, it gets slower and slower. Didn't it just say that it was nine like twenty minutes ago? But it says that it's only five after....
Ugh! I just need to calm down. Yes. I'll sit and close my eyes and maybe that'll help. I take my seat on a broken old sofa and lean my head back against the wall. The wallpaper is cracked and peeling, but it might have been pretty, back when it was first put up. Of course, that may have been fifty years ago, but who's counting? Most of the furniture is pretty old and beaten-up... the chair that the angry guy sitting across from me is sitting in has a leg tied on with a coil of rope. There aren't doors; instead, what looks like dirty bed sheets block the entrances to other areas of the place.
Great. This place is shit. Perfect.
I can hear the noises of the city coming in from outside. Some kids are playing, despite it beginning to get dark. I guess they're just trying to take advantage of the summer weather. It's been cool recently, not too rainy like most summer months, but just the right amount of moisture to keep it below boiling outside. Sounds like they're playing some sort of ball game. Every now and then one of them will shout something that will cause a whole chorus of little voices to start yelling at each other. It's kind of cute.
I look up at the clock. It's ten after. Shiva save me.
Finally, after staring into space for who knows how long, a lady dressed in white comes from behind the curtain in the back of the room. "Mr. Strife?" she asks, her brow creased. I jump up and nod my head. "Please follow me." she turns and I follow her behind the Curtain of Mystery.
The doorway she leads me through actually leads to a corridor with a rough wood floor. She leads me to the second "door" on the right and pushes the curtain to the side, allowing me to enter the room.
There she is. Tifa.
I rush over to the bedside and she smiles weakly at me. "Hey," she says, really softly, a tiny smile gracing her lips. She's dressed in some white cotton clothes that I've never seen before. I guess the lady gave them to her.
"Hey," I say back, moving my hand to gently brush a strand of sweaty hair away from her eyes. She looks really exhausted, and my heart constricts in my chest when I see how gaunt her face is. "Are you all right?" I ask, cupping her cheek with my palm.
She closes her eyes and smiles, a big grin, one of those knockout smiles that makes your knees melt. When she opens her deep brown eyes again, she whispers. "Cloud," she says, "I'll be fine."
The lady in white enters the room again, this time cradling a bundle wrapped in what looks like a pink blanket. My breath hitches in my throat. "Mr. and Mrs. Strife," she says, looking down at the bundle, "say hello to your beautiful daughter."
The lady hands the baby to Tifa, who immediately begins to cry. I'm awestruck. I kneel on one knee and observe, speechless, as Tifa tenderly touches the pink skin of our daughter. First, she runs her hand over the delicate pudge of her cheek. Then, she carefully slips her finger into the folds of the blanket to find her arm, the skin smooth and soft.
She slips her finger into the baby's hand, and like magic, five tiny little fingers wrap around hers, like a sign that she is happy that Tifa is there. "Hey baby," Tifa says, the tears streaming down her face now. "I'm your Mama."
I can't explain what my heart was feeling when she opened her eyes. They were a beautiful, crystalline blue, shining and bottomless and gorgeous. "Oh Cloud," Tifa breathed, smiling through her tears. "She's got your eyes," she cooed, gently touching our daughter's cheek again.
"But your hair," I say, the first thing to pass my lips since I laid eyes on my child. It's true - her tuft of baby hair was a very deep, chocolate brown, almost identical to Tifa's. "She's beautiful," I say, brushing the pad of my finger against her arm.
The whole time, the nurse lady is watching silently. Tifa looks up at her and smiles. The nurse steps over to the side of the bed opposite to me. "Have you thought of a name?" she asks, smiling kindly.
A name? Oh geez. I hadn't even thought of that. In the months preparing for delivery, I had been too worried about Tifa's health - after all, Tifa's not the largest woman in the world, and I was a little freaked out about the strain of birth and how it would affect her body.
"Tifa?" I say, looking at her. I was just about to suggestwe talk about this alone when she silences me.She smiles and then turns to the nurse.
"We want to name her Aeris," she says, and the dam in my heart burst. I don't think I had ever cried like I did when she said that simple sentence. And for the first time, even though I knew that I hadn't saved her, I thought that maybe I could help carry on her memory. Maybe now I can be complete.
- - - - - - -
Tried not to be too emotional with the introspection. I figured that Cloud wouldn't really be the type to go into a deep, heartfelt description of exactly how he was feeling at every moment, even if the topic was the birth of his daughter.
I own none of these characters from Final Fantasy VII. They belong to Square, y0.