A/N:
I'm gonna state this here, I did not play Three Hopes and I have no intention of ever playing it. Because it wasn't developed by Intelligent System, I am not going to consider that story cannon and as such the minor characters that were fleshed out in that story will be different from my interpretation. So, you may consider some of the characters like Rufus out of character, but I don't care the interpretation I came up with before that game are integral to future developments of this story. If this displeases you then I'm sorry but I'm not changing.
Just a reminder that I changed Byleth's birthday.
Chapter 43:
Verdant Rain Moon 1180:
Sixth of the Verdant Rain Moon
Byleth scowled up at her roof while she laid in bed. Because of Edelgard, the exhausted woman wasn't able to get much sleep, which meant this was her third night in a row without sleep. Thanks to the Sword of the Creator everyone had been too distracted to notice the bags under her eyes yesterday, but she was sure she wasn't going to be as lucky that day.
With a heavy sigh, she threw her covers over head and turned away from the window. If she skipped breakfast than she might be able to get a few more precious minutes of sleep. She barely managed to close her eyes before there was a knock at her door. With a groan she tried to sink into her bed and pretend that she didn't hear anything, but she couldn't ignore the second knock.
She swallowed her other groan as she let her intruder know to give her a few minutes. Quicker than her exhausted would have liked she threw on some clothes. Just from a quick glance at her reflection she could already telling she was going to concern everyone. Sighing she quickly ran a brush through her hair and ignored the painful knots that made the task difficult.
Taking a deep breath she reluctantly prepared herself and opened the door. "Happy birthday By!" Ingrid yelled with a large smile, and in stunned silence the said birthday girl forgot her exhaustion. "Am I the first-By did you not get any sleep?"
"It's my birthday?" Byleth asked, out of genuine curiosity and not because she wanted to change the subject.
"You forgot?" Ingrid chuckled. "That is so like you." Byleth's fatigue had all been but forgotten as she saw her friend's smile; it had been far to long since she last saw a genuine one. "We had expected you to do as such. You better prepare yourself as we all went out for your birthday!" Ingrid was smiling brightly, but it wasn't long before it fell away into a half-awkward one. "Er…that is if you are up to it. Are you alright?"
At the reminder, Byleth's exhaustion came flooding back and she wanted nothing more than to collapse to the floor. Fighting her urges she stood tall and gave her friend a small smile. She hoped that would be enough, but the lack of change from Ingrid didn't surprise her. She breathed deeply through her nose to avoid a sigh as she patted Ingrid's head.
"I'm fine. The excitement from the Sword of the Creator, made it a little hard to sleep. That's all," Byleth said as she stepped outside. She made it as far as the bottom of the stairs before she realized Ingrid wasn't following her. Glancing over her shoulder, she looked at the student, who was hesitant to move.
With a cock of her head to the side that was enough to prompt Ingrid to speak. "Do you not need the Sword of the Creator?" Byleth stiffened but kept her expression blank. After Edelgard's inquiry, the professor didn't want the sword again. She didn't want to be the super special one; but above all she didn't want people to think that about her as well.
She made no effort to move, not even when she saw Sothis floating in the doorway. Her nails dug into leg as she didn't want to alert Ingrid to her into struggle by balling them into fists. Desperately she tried to think of what to say but that all failed when Ingrid called for her. Struggling to not grit her teeth, the troubled woman, instead, put on a fake smile as she walked back into her room.
In a tucked away corner the accursed sword sat. Sothis' pity only added to Byleth's frustration. As she reached for the sword, she begged to the goddess that it wouldn't glow at her touch, but the goddess didn't smile upon her, and she was bathed in a wretched red light. With great effort she swallowed the curse that threaten to rip out of her
Her checks began to hurt from a smile that could rival's Dimitri's princely one, she turned to Ingrid with the despicable blade at her side. "I'm not used to having to carry the sword around." Byleth wasn't sure why she said that because it was clear that Ingrid wasn't going to buy any excuse. The younger woman opened her mouth to say something but fearing the topic the older one was quick to interrupt. "We should go get some breakfast." Her friend quickly shut her mouth; and though, she said nothing her eyes told Byleth all her questions making it impossible for the upset woman to look the other in the eye.
"By," Ingrid said quickly, but stopped abruptly. Byleth waited for the blonde to continue, but she never did; and instead chose to rush out of the room. Alarm overridden all of Byleth's emotions as she ran to her door just in time to see Ingrid jump down the stairs. As if to only add more to the professor's confusion, Ingrid turned around waving with a large smile on her face. "Come along By! Everyone is waiting for us!"
Byleth did not move right away and simply watched Ingrid for a bit. When it finally registered what her friend was doing it felt like a weight was lifted from her shoulders. Her fake smile was swiftly replaced with a small but real one as she chased after her friend.
The two walked in silence. Both wore smiles and despite being exhausted, the former mercenary was looking forward to what the day had instore. They made it a few rooms down, before Ingrid spoke up, "By, whenever you are ready, I will gladly listen to all of your fears. I will always be here for you."
Stopping in her tracks, Byleth gaze dropped to the ground as if something was pushing down upon it. She recalled the conversation she had with her friends when she was in the infirmary, and it brought her a warmth. Slowly, her gaze returned to Ingrid, who was watching her carefully, but there was no judgement or anger in her friend's eyes. "Thank you," Byleth said in a soft whisper, but it seemed like Ingrid was able to hear it by the small nod she gave. She wasn't ready to talk. She wasn't even sure if she would ever be ready to talk; but it was such a great comfort to know that someone was willing to listen to her.
The two continued their walk to the Dining Hall in a much better mood. They engaged in pleasant small talk and Byleth couldn't remember the last time she had such a nice moment with Ingrid, or with anyone for that matter. As they walked, they would occasionally be interrupted by someone wishing Byleth a "happy birthday". It was a weird situation for the professor, but she wasn't uncomfortable about it, though Ingrid did giggle at every one of Byleth awkward reactions.
The pleasant mood came to a swift end when someone, from the church, came running up to them. Byleth tried to prepare herself, but nothing she could have done would have prepared her for what the clergy woman said. "Happy birthday Saintess!" the woman shouted with such glee and held out a delicately wrapped gift. It was only because of pure instincts and habits that Byleth took the gift and thanked the person. Having completed their little task the person left with a little joyful step, but not before giving Byleth a grand bow that the former mercenary had only seen reserved for royalty.
Once the person was out of Byleth's sight, everything came crashing down. With the color completely drained from her face, she began to shake uncontrollably. The small present was crushed in a death grip as the word saintess echoed over and over again in her mind. It felt like all the air had been sucked out of her all at once, and she hunched over from desperate gaps for air.
In her struggle for air the present slipped through her grasps and the sound it made when it crashed into the ground pierced through her chaotic mind. She completely forgot about her difficult to breathe as her head shot up and she stared at her room. She needed to leave. It wasn't safe there! She made an attempt to run to her room but was stopped by Ingrid grabbing her arm.
"By, what is wrong?!" Ingrid asked.
Wide eyes stared at Ingrid as silence held Byleth's voice hostage. She needed to leave. She didn't have time to deal with Ingrid. Those thoughts raced through her mind at an alarming speed, and yet she made no effort to pull her arm free. Her vision began to blur, but she didn't dare close her eyes for even a second. She could tell that Ingrid was saying something, but the words were unable to pierce through her thoughts that demanded she leave.
Ingrid took a step towards Byleth, and instantly all of the terrified woman's senses became hyper aware of that. Byleth took a step back, determined to maintain that little distances, but she didn't try to free her arm despite her mind screaming at her to do so. Her legs shook terribly, and a new fear was born from the idea that they would give out and she wouldn't be able to leave. With the new fear the difficulty to breathe returned.
A new voice joined in the mix, and her instincts took control. With a powerful jerk of her captive arm back, she dragged an unprepared Ingrid forward and with the palm of her free hand she jammed into Ingrid's chest, knocking the other woman back and freeing her arm. The other voice screamed out her name, but she didn't flinch as she spun on the balls of her feet and with the speed that developed after years of battle, she faced the intruder with her sword drawn and ready to strike. If it wasn't for her quick reactions or the skills, she had honed she would have been too late and the Sword of the Creator would have plunged into her father's chest, but she had managed twist her wrist enough that the flat side of the sword grazed her father's side. Her wrists screamed out, but her father was fine.
It seemed as if time had frozen as everyone just stared at each other without saying anything. She had only been vaguely aware that she didn't feel Sothis' magic letting her know that everything was still happening in real time. All at once, everything left her, and she dropped to her knees and the Hero Relic slid away from her.
Her father's reaction speed matched hers as he managed to catch her before she fell completely. In some kind of compacity she could hear that Ingrid and her father had screamed out her name but none of it really registered. Her vision blurred with tears that would never fall, and she had no idea what emotion they belonged too. It was only because her father was holding her that prevented her limp body from falling, but she had no concern for that.
Shouts of her name went on deaf ears. Unable to comprehend their concern, she managed to gain some agency as the desire to run returned. Finally, truly able to comprehend that it was her father that was holding her she gripped his arm. The words to beg him to take her far from there died on her lips when she looked into his eyes. A strangled cry escaped her as she dropped her head.
It was by her father's choice that brought them to Garreg Mach, she couldn't ask him to leave. By being so different, she had to have made his life incredibly difficult. How could she keep adding to his troubles? Her grip on his arm slowly loosened unit it fell away. She couldn't do that to him. Not again. Sucking in a deep breath, through her clenched teeth, she buried the desire to run away deep within.
"I'm sorry," she said suddenly, interrupting one of them but she didn't know who and to be honest she didn't care. "…I'm just tired…" Refusing help she got onto her feet by herself. She wasn't able to look at any of them, and so she turned towards the direction of the Dining Hall. She was expecting to look at a space, free from anyone, but instead, it was blocked with Sothis and Byleth nearly lost her composure. She chocked back a sob and quickly looked towards the ground, the only space she knew would be safe.
She shut her eyes and helplessly tried to empty her mind of everything. Her efforts failed spectacularly as soon as she felt a hand on her shoulder. She wanted to scream out, but she some how managed to hold herself back, though as a result it felt like it was trapped in her chest causing her trouble to breathe and threatening to break free any time.
So very reluctantly, she looked at her father, when he squeezed her shoulder. Just as she feared, he seemed to be overwhelmed. She reached out to touch him with an apology on the tip of her tongue, but it was forgotten when he spoke up.
"Byleth, what's wrong?" he asked in such a delicate voice. A frown overtook her features as she looked away. It was only then that she realized that Ingrid was no longer with them, and she wasn't sure how she felt about that. She mumbled how she was tired, but the strong grip on her shoulder told her, she was going to need a better excuse.
"Byleth have I let you down?" She whipped her head around so fast that she was sure she hurt something but didn't care. The only thing that was registering in her mind was the look on her father's face and how much she detested it.
"No!" she screamed out as it was now her turn to hold onto him. "What would make you believe such a thing?"
"You don't tell me anything anymore." Her heart dropped. "You choose to keep everything bottled up."
"I…" She started, ready to say some excuse, but when she spied Sothis shaking her head no, Byleth gave up on that excuse. "I…I…" She tried to start again but it felt like there was a lump in a back of her throat and that made it difficult to speak. It was only by Sothis' gentle gestures that Byleth found some way to finish. "I just don't want to burden you more than I already do…"
"You are a fool!" he mumbled as he pulled her in for a bear hug. She didn't try to fight his embrace and instead gave herself fully to it. "You are my precious daughter. I would never think such a thing!" At his declaration she clung to him.
The two didn't stay long like that, despite her desires to not let go. Once separated she felt better, but she still felt the weight of everything threatening to crush her at a moment's notice. She could at least breathe relatively easy now so that was something at least.
The father and daughter looked into each other's eyes, neither of them said anything. She knew she was the one that needed to speak first, but that didn't make forming her thoughts any easier. She glanced around to make sure no one was listening, or maybe it was just simply a stall tactic, she wasn't really sure. When she noticed Ingrid a bit further down the road, watching them, she knew she had to hurry up and say something soon, so she returned her gaze back to her father.
"I…," she started but her voice was barely a whisper. Frustrated at herself she looked away from everyone, hoping that would help- it didn't. She could feel a pressure on her neck as if someone was trying to guide her back to looking at her father; and so, she did only so she wouldn't have to dwell on what that pressure was or who it came from.
Her father was very patient. None of his actions were prompting her to say anything and for that she was grateful. With one final inspection of the area, she locked eyes with her father when she deemed it was clear. As if sensing her resolve, he gave her a little nod, and that was it, she could no longer put off speaking.
"I don't want to be a saintess," she said in one breathe. She forgot everything and focused on how easily she said that. Involuntarily she frowned at herself. She didn't prefer saying that to be difficult, but something about the ease of which she said it bothered her for some unknown reason. If she could say the rest of her troubles so easily then maybe she wouldn't cause her friends and father to worry so much; and yet, she knew that she wouldn't be able to do that.
"Then don't be," the sound of her father's voice brought her attention back to him. "Don't let anyone force you to be something you don't want to be."
Silently, she narrowed her eyes as she stared at him. With a slight bashful look, he looked away and rubbed the back of his head. She folded her arms over her chest and maintained her little glare to which he sighed.
"I really do want to say to the Eternal Flame with whatever the church wants," he said after a while, and her glare fell away. She wanted to believe what her father was saying, but his action had her second guessing. "But they will do what they want regardless of a person's wishes." The dark shift of his tone had her gaze returning to him. The two locked eyes and that earlier darkness vanished into a softness reserved only for her.
"Kid, if you don't want to be a staintess than don't." A scowl formed on her lips as her gaze drifted away. "And if they force you to be one than just remember you are the Ashen Demon." She cocked her head to the side and looked at him. He started to sport a large smile and she found it to be contagious, though she fought against it. "Who ever heard of a demon becoming a saint?"
Her eyes widen as she continued to stare at him. There was no way it could be so simple and yet…Slowly it felt like a great weight was being lifted off of her shoulders. Sothis floated into view and gave Byleth a little nod with a smile, it finally felt like everything would be okay for the struggling woman. A small smile formed on her lips. She was the Ashen Demon! Once people learned of that there would be no way they could make her a saintess. Not even the archbishop with all her power could erase Byleth's past.
There was a small spring in Byleth's step as she made her way over to Ingrid. Ingrid said nothing, but her eyes shinned with the desire to ask a myriad of questions. Choosing to play ignorant Byleth prompted her friend to walk and motioned for her father to keep up.
She knew full well that such a simple solution would not be enough for her problems, but she decided that it was enough for now. Her crest, the Sword of the Creator, and the archbishop would be problems to worry about another day, for not she would focus on her friends and father that were excited to celebrate her birthday. With that thinking she was able to breathe easily and that helped to calm herself down some more.
"Byleth?" Ingrid called with uncertainty clear in her voice.
The older woman flashed her a small smile before turning her gaze forward. "I am the Ashen Demon," Byleth answered. A chuckle escaped the older woman as she heard the confused, little noise that escaped her friend. "It's my epithet that I earned as a mercenary." From the corner of her eye, she spied Ingrid's frown. "I hated it at first, but it's not so bad." That explanation was obviously not going to be enough, but she had no intention of explaining any further.
"It kept the boys away, so it was a good epithet," her father chimed in. "Though there is one fool, who didn't get the memo," he grumbled the last part.
Ingrid's confusion and hesitation remained, and Byleth knew that the younger woman deserved a better explanation, but she feared that talking about it any more would ruin her cheer. She flashed her friend a smile and patted her head, and though Ingrid did not resist it, it was clear that it only added to her confusion. With a laugh Byleth finally decided to say, "I'm sorry, but not yet." While Ingrid's expression wasn't a cheerful look, she did at least give a nod of understanding. "I'll be sure to tell you someday."
The subject wasn't discussed further as they neared the Dining Hall more and more people started to wish Byleth happy birthday. It was bit overwhelming, and the birthday girl just knew that once she was inside it would be worse. She looked at her father, hoping for him to get her out of it, but the mischievous grin he gave her had her quaking in her boots. As quickly as she could she tried to spin on the balls of her feet to run, only for the powerful had on her back to stop her. She gave a pleading look to her father and his grin grew. With some help from Ingrid, Byleth's father pushed his daughter into the hall and explosive cheers filled the room. While she despised the Sword of that Creator, at that moment she was grateful that she had it.
Breakfast left Byleth in such a great mood and she hoped it helped to put an end to Ingrid's concern. They day flew by as a blur. She taught, or at least she thought she did, but all she could remember were the teasing and the jokes about having to work on her birthday. It had been so long since she was free from her worries that she fell hard for the cheer, and her friends and students only made it easier with their after-school celebration.
In the middle of the rose gardens, her friends set up a large tea party and Byleth was excited. The table was full of all kinds of sweets as well as various finger foods that fit with a tea party. She was given the seat at the head of the table, and though she had come to expect the spot given her position, she still felt special. All other seats were filled except for two. Her father was invited but because of a meeting he couldn't make it, and as for the other one, Sylvain made sure to alert her that Dimitri would make up for missing the party; she had her doubts about that but said nothing.
"Happy birthday!" everyone shouted as most made their presents visible.
"Who should go first?" Mercedes asked.
"Me!" both Sylvain and Annette shouted at the same time. Annette shot Sylvain a little glare and he returned it with a playful one. They argued a bit on who should get the honor of going first, but their little battle was made moot when Felix ignored them and presented his gift, a Silver Sword. Their complaints fell on deaf ears as Felix couldn't have been bothered to care.
Unlike the others, who made an effort to wrap up their gift, Felix made no effort and presented his sword as how he got it and Byleth didn't care. His gift, while simple, was incredibly expensive and the craftmanship of it was incredibly, which had her marveling at it. They shared their opinions on what makes a sword great for a bit until someone loudly cleared their throat putting an end to their little conversation to which Felix scoffed at.
"My turn!" Annette shouted drowning out both Felix's and Sylvain complaint. Upon opening the colorfully but messily wrapped gift, the professor discovered that she was given a book on magic. "I know a lot of your magic is mostly self-taught, but I think if you learned a bit more from the basics you will become even more powerful!" Everything the student said made sense, but as someone who didn't like to read, Byleth wasn't too keen on that learning method.
"Oh, just do it," Sothis pipped in. "With how explosive you make your magic; you should have a more solid foundation of the basics." At first Byleth frowned at the light jab, but when she realized how long it had been since Sothis made such a comment at her it brought her smile back. Byleth may have a lot of complicated feelings when it came to Sothis, but she still liked having the mysterious girl in her life.
"Thank you," the professor said with a smile, and Annette exploded with excitement explaining all kinds of potential spells her teacher could develop. It took Mercedes speaking to get Annette to sheepishly quiet down. Still a bit overwhelmed Byleth assured the young mage that they could try and come up with some new spells or techniques at a later date, and that pleased Annette.
"It looks like someone has some high expectations to live up too," Sothis chimed in and Byleth simply nodded in agreement.
"Me next!" Sylvain shouted with a glee she hadn't heard from him in a while. He didn't pass the gift down like Annette did and choose to rush over to her. His large smile was a delight to see as well as infectious as her own little smile grew a bit.
With a little bit of flare, he pulled off the cloth that covered his gift, revealing a little bottle with a purple liquid inside. She looked at the bottle for a moment before looking at him for answers. With a laugh he gently grabbed one of her wrists and lightly sprayed the liquid onto it and then he rubbed his own wrist against her own. He gestured for her to sniff her wrist and at first, she was hesitant but when she smelled the scent of lavender her eyes widen.
Jasmine scented soaps were the only luxury she would splurge on while as a mercenary, but a perfume was just too much. Unsure of what to say, she could only look at him and he laughed. He gestured to his seat, where another box sat. "I also have some candles with the scent as well," he said, bringing her attention back to him. "I hear that they are quite calming." He didn't say anymore, and he didn't have too as she got his point. Even when she was struggling and lashing out, deep down she knew her friends cared and to see it represented in such a gift was greatly appreciated.
"Thank you," she said softly. She hoped that she was able to convey the true depth of her gratitude as she couldn't think of any other way to express it. Sylvan's smile softened and answered her with the same tone.
Taking a moment, she closed her eyes and breathed in the scent again. It was a comforting scent that she was sure would help her in the future. As she opened her eyes a thought occurred to her and she glanced at Sylvain, who raised an eyebrow. "I thought you said I wasn't allowed to accept expensive gifts from men?" There was a pause and then he burst out laughing.
"Your birthday is the only time you can make an exception for that." Her eyes narrowed and he laughed some more. "Are you going to return mine and Felix's gift?" She stiffened and looked away with a slight blush coloring her cheeks. If she had too, she would, but…she really didn't want too.
"Do not listen to that fool," Felix said. "You can accept whatever gifts you want from whoever and whenever." Sylvain gave Felix a little glare, and it was returned with a roll of his eyes. "Of course, it must be from good people only." The swordsman gave her a little warning glare and Sylvain nodded in agreement. Byleth wasn't sure what he meant by that, but she wasn't in the mood for a lecture and just agreed for their sake.
The rest of her gifts were given in more calmly manners. Ashe was excited to give her a copy of his favorite book, and while she had no interest in reading for his sake, she would at least attempt to read it. Dedue had presented a small potted plant with little lip service, but she understood his feelings, nonetheless. And Mercedes had given Byleth a handmade scarf, and the practicality of it was most appreciated.
Ingrid was the last to present her gift and seemed to be hesitant to do so. It was only after some teasing from Sylvain that she finally presented the gift though she did it more of a fact of answering a challenge than wanting too. When her actions dawned on her, she broke out into a massive apology and slowly lowed her arms as if the present had become heavier with each passing second.
Choosing not to drag out Ingrid internal struggle, Byleth graciously accepted the gift and made no comment to the apology. The gift had been carefully wrapped in a beautiful blue fabric and Byleth almost didn't want to ruin it by opening it, but for Ingrid's sake she did and was pleasantly surprised to find a pair of riding boots. While it was a practical gift that Byleth would surely put to use, it was also a bit random as Byleth didn't ride nearly as often as her friends did. Her smile didn't fall away because of her confusion but it wasn't as large as before, that being said she was still eternally grateful and was sure to express that. She wasn't sure if Ingrid had caught on to her confusion or if her friend was just acting out on her anxiety as she blurted out an apology.
"It is a dumb gift, I apologize!" Ingrid stammered before anyone could say anything. "You once mentioned about wanting to be a Pegasus Knight, but that clearly does not fight your fighting style and I…"
Ingrid continued to stammer on, despite everyone's best attempts to assure her that the gift was great. Byleth hadn't been one of the people to try and console her friend as she had gotten too lost her in thoughts. She did want to become a Pegasus Knight -in fact she still did- but because a Pegasus was far beyond what she could ever hope to afford she gave up on that dream. But Garreg Mach provided Pegasus to students and faculty; this was her chance!
"Daisy, I love these!" Byelth shouted, silencing everyone. She leaned in close to Ingrid, who was too stunned to do anything. "Could you please train with me?" As a professor it was Byleth's responsibility to train her students in such regards, but Ingrid had way more experience. The flustered student didn't say anything for a moment before realization hit and a huge smile adored her face as she agreed to train Byleth.
The rest of the tea party flew by with not a single smile leaving anyone face. Throughout the party other students would come by and give Byleth gifts and/or wish her happy birthday. There was a noticeable absent from the visits and that was Claude. She was disappointed to not see him, but she chose to not dwell on it on it as everyone else had done a wonderful job at making her feel loved and that helped to make her forget her lingering fears.
As her friends cleaned up the party, Byleth had walked back to her room to put her gifts away, and while she did so she hummed a little tune, something she couldn't recall ever doing in her life before. Her cheer was so strong she was sure nothing could dampen it, but that did change when she ran into the archbishop. At the sight of holy woman, the smile nearly left fell off of her face, but thanks to Flayn's (who had been there along with Seteth) honest cheer kept the smile on Byleth's face. With some overly excited movements Flayn handed over a fishing pole with a little bow around it to Byleth.
"Happy birthday!" Flayn shouted and the professor returned it with a little nod. "I've noticed you fishing from time to time, so my brother and I got you this pole. You have to share some of the fish that you catch with it with me, okay?"
"I'll be sure to do that," Byleth said with a little chuckle. "Thank you very much." Flayn did a little jump with glee and clapped, while Seteth said nothing and simply nod to which Byleth returned with one of her own.
"My child," the archbishop started and Byleth had to suppress her body from reacting to the shiver that ran down her spine. "It pleases me greatly to see you finally walking around with the Sword of the Creator." The younger woman wanted to make a comment about not having a choice in the matter but chose to remain silent.
Ignoring Byleth's boundaries, as usual, the archbishop reached out and placed a hand on the young woman's face. The professor did not recoil, despite very much wanting to do so, but she did make her displeasure clearly known with the scowl that tainted her face. "My child," Byleth took a deep breathe but remained silent. "I cannot tell you how much it pleases me to be celebrating your birthday with you." The holy woman's expression never changed and Byleth refused to speak. It took far to long for the archbishop to remove her hand and stepped away. "I would have loved to invite you to have tea with me, but it seems your students have beaten me to it." The younger woman's smile returned for a number of reasons.
Without saying anything the archbishop motioned for her aid to step forward and it was only then did Byleth noticed the gift in the aid's hands. Reluctantly, she took the gift and muttered a small thanks. The box was surprisingly heavy and was wrapped in a very expensive paper, but she made no move to open it right away. To spare herself some time, Byleth glanced at the archbishop and there was that expectant gaze that she hated so much.
Knowing that she could not put it off any longer, she opened the box, and her eyes widen at the sight of the item. It was a massive gold headpiece with a several heart shapes etchings and several large white gems that accentuated the piece, along with four long ribbons of pink and white. Her hands began to shake, and she could feel herself losing the ability to breathe, let alone speak.
Slowly Byleth tore her eyes away from the jewelry to look at the archbishop, who looked satisfied. The color drained from the struggling woman's face and now her whole body shook. No thoughts or words came to her, as she helplessly stared at the holy woman.
Seteth was the one to break the tension, but it did little to help her. With a stern tone, he told the archbishop that they needed to talk. He gave Byleth a nod before practically dragging the archbishop away; of course, none of that really registered to the terrified woman. Flayn had looked between Byleth and her brother, before chasing after Seteth, leaving Byleth all alone.
How long had she been standing there? She couldn't tell. And if someone tried to reach out to her in some way it never registered. She felt like she was frozen in time.
"Byleth!" someone shouted as they pulled her towards them. The sudden jerkiness caused the gift to finally slip from her hands and exposing its contents to all on the floor, but that didn't matter to either of them.
"Are you okay?" the voice shouted. "Are you hurt?" It took a moment, but she finally registered what was going on and looked at the person who grabbed her, her father. She didn't answer him and instead her gaze settled on the headdress.
He didn't say anything as he picked up the box and closed it, hiding away the offending piece of jewelry. Silence remained as he looked at her, seeking answers, answers he should have known by now she wouldn't share so easily. How was she supposed to tell him, or anyone for that matter, that that headpiece was the exact same one as the mysterious girl that only she could see or hear?
"Its not mine!" Sothis shouted from behind Jeralt's shoulder. Byleth said nothing and simply stared at the mysterious girl. "It might be the same design, but it must be a church design and nothing more." The quiet woman bit her lip and said nothing. "The archbishop and the siblings have similar pieces of jewelry. It must simply be a coincidence and nothing more." It was no mere coincidence, they both knew that, but Byleth didn't want to know what the archbishop was trying to imply with the gift.
"Would pretending to not notice wat the archbishop is planning do anything?" Byleth mumbled more to herself.
"It would certainly piss her off," her father answered, and successfully pulled her attention to him. He gave her a cheeky grin that had her relaxing without even noticing. "You should do it." Her eyes widened. "Whoever heard of a demon listening to some church lady anyway?" Rubbing her head, a little too roughly earned him a complaint but some laughter as well.
When she playfully pushed him off, he stopped to pick up the item, he had tossed aside before he grabbed her. After making sure she was in a better mood he handed her a gift, a Killer Bow. Her eyes widen as she plucked the string. Every year he got her a new sword, but a certain brat beat him to it, so he decided on getting her a new weapon that she was trying to master. He had wanted to give it to her during the brats' little tea party, and while he hated the meeting that caused him to miss it, it turned out to be a blessing as he was able to meet her in a crucial moment and give her something that proved to be a wonderful distraction.
With a smile he watched her practice firing a few fake arrows. A chuckle escaped him as he watched her maneuver with it as if she was in a real battle. Her careful calculations of movement made him both proud and disappointed. He never wanted her to be a warrior and yet fate gave him no choice.
"It's so light!" she said, and her voice broke him out of his thoughts. Another chuckle escaped him as he watched her show that fact off.
"That is one reason, why I chose that particular bow." She stopped what she was doing to give him her full attention. "It was also because of its name." She gave him her typical head tilt that reminded him so much of her mother and it brought a wave of complicated emotions with it. "What kind of saintess wields a killer weapon?" With wide eyes her gaze returned to the bow.
The name choice was a lie as he had bought the weapon long after a feisty, little brat declared that a sword was already bought for Byleth, but regardless he hoped his little lie would bring her some comfort. He wasn't foolish enough to believe that just reminding Byleth that she was the Ashen Demon would be enough, nor would it really solve anything. Her problems were far too great for such a simple solution, but since she told him so little there was not much he could do for her; and he absolutely hated that fact.
Bawling his fists, he swallowed away his discomfort as his daughter would be his only focus at that moment. As if sensing his change, she stopped her inspection to look at him. He didn't say anything right away, as he was over come at how much she looked like her mother. It was only when she called out to him, did he finally decided to speak, "Byleth be whatever you want to be." Silently she stared at him for a bit before her gaze slowly drifted away. "Don't let anyone force you to do something you don't want to do." Her eyes narrowed, but she did look back up at him and gave him a firm nod to which he returned with a smile.
"Atta girl!" He threw an arm around her shoulder and began to drag her away. She made complaints but made no effort to push him away. "Let's get dinner." At the mention of food, she began to obediently match his pace and he laughed.
As they walked, she told him all about the tea party and a soft smile danced upon his lips. Ever since they came to Garreg Mach he had been having serious doubts about his decisions, especially as of late; but hearing such stories made him belie he might have done right. His daughter thrived being near her friends. Now if only two specific boys would get their acts together, then his worries would diminish greatly. Sothis help him, he couldn't believe that he was having such thoughts about those two.
Dinner had been the final thing needed to return Byleth to her earlier cheer. Even though everyone in the Dining Hall had most likely wished her a happy birthday at some point that day, they still wished her another one and she was even given an extra helping on her plate. How could she not be in a good mood after that? With her friends she chatted about various activities that they would do once they got to someone's room but stopped when they spied Claude waiting off to the side. Byleth had been hesitant to approach him, but a push from someone had her stumbling towards him. After agreeing to meet up in Felix's room (so he couldn't run away) her friends allowed her to leave with the Golden Deer's leader.
The two stood around in an awkward silence outside of the hall. When she noticed all his glances at people that passed by, she recommended talking in her room, despite Sothis' protest. The walk to her room was awkward and she hoped being in her room would help.
Being alone in her room didn't help the situation at all as the silence continued. Tired of just standing around she sat on her bed and that prompted a small reaction from Claude, though he didn't say anything. She didn't like a silent Claude, it seemed so unnatural, but she didn't do anything to help him. As Sothis' order, Byleth wasn't allowed to reach out first; she was the one who was hurt and thus it was Claude's responsibility-no duty-to approach first and apologize, or so Sothis had explained. While Byleth did agree with it, she also hated the distance that was growing between the two.
The seconds ticked by, and it was aggravating. Byleth was trying to stick to the ground rules Sothis' set, but the silence was becoming to be too much; the professor believed even Dedue would have an issue with it. Just when she was about to meet her wits end, Claude moved by thrusting a small box at her.
She stared at the box before looking up at Claude. Briefly the two made eye contact, before he quickly looked away. Her gaze remained fixated on him for a bit longer before it returned back to the gift as she took it. Unlike so many other gifts, she had received that day, it wasn't elaborately wrapped or even had a bow wrapped around it, it was a plain box, not that it bothered her.
She waited a bit to see if he would say anything, but when he still remained silent, she opened the box. Inside was a neatly folded piece of yellow fabric with a dark grey-blue patch in the middle of it. Right when she reached out to touch it, he finally spoke up.
"I am sorry," he said while bowing. She didn't say anything and instead looked to Sothis, who slightly shook her head no.
The silence continued as Byleth didn't know what to do. She got the apology she wanted, or at least she thought she did, but apparently not. A frown planted itself on her lips as she went back to looking at the gift.
After Sothis warned her to not say anything, the professor kept her lips tightly sealed. Claude didn't move and when she gestured to him the mysterious girl simply shook her head again. Swallowing her complaint, Byleth returned her focus onto her gift.
To distract herself form the stillness, she finally took out the fabric. It was longer than she expected, and the material was something she wasn't familiar with. As she ran her finger over it, her eyes went wide as she realized what it was.
"Meadow is this…?" she asked without thinking. She saw him flinch, but he was quick to stand straight and meet her gaze. He didn't say anything but did nod. "I can't-"
"I want you to have it," he finally said.
Her gaze returned to the fabric. She ran her fingers over it, marveling at the unique texture. It was the only piece of Alymran fabric he had. It was the only thing he allowed himself to own that reminded him of his home.
"Meadow, I can't-"
"I truly do want you to have it." She frowned, but he didn't seem to be bothered by that.
Cautiously he walked over to her, and when she didn't do anything, he dared to stand before her. His dazzling green eyes lacked the confidence he normally had, and it was a sight she wasn't pleased to see. Before she could speak up, he held out an open hand to her. Her gaze switched between him and his hand for a moment, trying to understand what he wanted; and it was only after Sothis suggested it that Byleth handed him the fabric; a small smile formed upon his lips letting her know that she did the right thing.
Gently he began to wrap the fabric around her head. It was a soothing sensation that had succeeded in eroding away her last bit of tenson. She was sure her staring at him, while he completed his task, was uncomfortable but she couldn't bring herself to look away and his lack of complaints ensured that her stare would continue.
Once he finished, he stepped back and had a genuine smile. She titled her head to the side, waiting for him to say something, and was a little annoyed that he didn't say anything. She had no mirror to see what she looked like, and she knew if she were to go out wearing it, he would become uncomfortable. The silence continued and she decided she was okay with not knowing how she looked like, so long as he was happy.
Without warning the smile suddenly left his face and he hung his head. A gasp was barely able to escape her before he started to speak, "I owe you a better apology," he said. She glanced as Sothis, seeking answers and the mysterious girl shook her head.
Displeased with Sothis' order Byleth reached out to the young man but stopped when he moved slightly. "My life…," he started, but quickly stopped. Her hand still remained frozen in the air as she looked between Claude and Sothis. Multiple time she opened and closed her mouth as she struggled on what to say. In the end she didn't need to do anything as it seemed like Claude figured out what he wanted to say.
"My life has not been easy…" he kept his gaze downward Despite wanting to pull him in for a hug like she would have done for Dimitri, she fought against that urge as she was sure Claude didn't want that. As if to prove her intuition right, he suddenly met her gaze and she flinched.
"Just because my life was difficult does not give me the right to ignore your own struggles." For a moment he broke eye contact to release a puff of air, in what some might considered as a laugh. "Your life was more likely much more difficult than mine and yet I acted like that." She wanted to object. His pain and struggle were just as valid as hers, regardless of who had it "worse", but she bit her tongue as she knew now wasn't the time for that.
His gaze returned to hers and for a moment neither of them said anything and just simply stared at each other. "By, I am not sure why you wanted to be my friend." Once again, she bit her tongue, knowing that silence was the better choice, but boy was it difficult to do so. "I have been nothing but selfish ever since we first met." There was another pause and she so much wanted to say something but remained silent.
"I understand if you no longer-" That was her breaking point as she threw her arms around Claude and pulled him for a tight hug. A gasp escaped him and his body went rigid, but other than that he didn't do anything, so she squeezed him tighter.
"Oh Meadow, you are a fool!" she said, and he stiffened some more. "You are my precious friend, and nothing will ever change that." He didn't react right away, and she wondered if she did something wrong. Right when she was about to pull away, he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her back. Into her shoulder he mumbled his gratitude and she choose to ignore the emotional tinge in his voice.
Lord Rodrigue had managed to succeed in distracting Dimitri from his nervousness, though the means he had achieved by doing so left Dimitri wishing for the nervousness instead. He felt so hollow as he sat in his seat waiting for the court to start. While he was in no mood to deal with anyone and tried to keep to himself, several people still approached him and talked to him. He was cordial to all, but he knew why they were doing this. They wanted to know why he wasn't with Lord Rodrigue as it was well known that the duke was the prince's closest confident; and such Dimitri knew he couldn't let others questions their bond and yet…
To make this day worse was the fact that he only realized it was Byleth's birthday after the secretary confirmed the date. Attending this court was incredibly important and he knew that and he also knew that Byleth would be very understanding and yet, he very much did not want to miss her birthday not when already had so much make up for. As if realizing the date as well, Lord Rodrigue had approached him, asking to pass along a message to her. He wanted to think that his father figure's intentions were genuine, but because he didn't try to approach Dimitri in a more subtle way, the prince couldn't help but wonder if this was a political move to show their bond as well as possibly strengthening a connection to Byleth. Pushing his feeling deep down, he assured the duke that he would pass along the message as well as show the other nobles that they were still on good terms, by talking about how Felix must have given his gift to Byleth already.
Arriving late to the meeting, as everyone expected, was the King Regent Rufus. He did not offer apologies or excuses, and no one was expecting for him to do so. Briefly he spared his nephew a glance, but there was no love in the gaze. With a wave of his head, he gestured for everyone to take a seat before doing the same. There were no formalities, no proper start, nothing to be expected from the head of the nation and while some of the nobles made their displeasure known, Dimitri buried his complaints deep within himself.
It came as quite a surprise to Dimitri that his point was the first to be addressed at court that day. He felt a sense of hope and pride swell within him as he began to discuss his argument, but he quickly realized why he went first; they were just getting the unimportant topics out of the way first as well as humoring the powerless prince. Despite his anger he managed to remain calm as he explained his argument as to why the lands of Duscur should be given to a new lord, but few seemed to regard his argument with genuine concern. In the end the lands would still remain in Viscount Kleiman's hands, but he would at least have to ask for permission from the crown before he could do anything to Duscur. The prince kept his face blank, but it was another painful reminder that he still had a long way to go before he could keep his promise to Dedue.
While Dimitri had no other issues to address in court, he did stay for the remainder as it was rare for him to be given the opportunity. A big focus of that court had to do with Lord Lonato's land and how to address the issue of the rebellion. It was an uncomfortable topic for many as Lord Lonato had been a well-respected man, and that had been a main reason why the issue hadn't been resolved despite it happening months ago; regardless Dimitri was pleased to see that it was a topic that was being handled carefully and seriously. He was overjoyed to hear no discussions of the lands being taken away from Ashe and his family, though he was sure Ashe would feel uncomfortable becoming the lord of the land when he comes of age.
No real decision was made on what to do with the lands and rebellion and that seemed to have been the same result the last few times at court; and it didn't help that the king regent wasn't being a proper mediator, embarrassing the prince. No one seemed to be pleased but they remained professional as they discussed the next topics. These topics also needed the crown to mediate and while the regent seemed frustrated by the fact, he at least did his job, al bit with little care and reverence. As the meeting progressed the more it became clear to Dimitri that no one was pleased with his uncle, but his uncle showed no signs of caring.
Eager to end the court, the king regent was quick to get onto to his feet, but before he could announce the end Margrave Gautier raised his hand to speak. With a huff the regent collapsed into his seat and gestured for the margrave to speak. The margrave did not speak right away as he waited for the quiet complains of the regent to pass.
With a complaint, Dimitri's uncle gestured again for the noble to speak, but he still remained silent. He did not speak until he spared the prince a glance, "I believe there is still one very important topic that needs to be discussed." Whispers spread, but the margrave kept his gaze on Dimitri. Lord Rodrigue flinched and closed his eyes, and this action seemed to go unnoticed by everyone but the prince, and he feared he wasn't going to like what the topic was about.
"Oh? And what is it?" the king regent asked bitterly.
The margrave finally looked away from the prince to address the annoyed man. "We should discuss about what we are to do about the new saintess."
In an instant the room went dead silent. The king regent went stiff at first, but quickly composed himself and presented himself as a ruler, for the first time that meeting. Dimitri was the exact opposite, as she struggled to keep expression neutral. He quickly slipped his hands under the table so no one could see them trembling. Gripping one of his hands so tightly, he hoped the pain would overwhelm his nausea, but it didn't.
"She is not a saintess!" one of the nobles objected loudly. Dimitri recognized him as someone that had been strongly against Byleth being close with him; and while he had no proof, he had strongly believed that that man had been the one to spread the horrible rumor that Byleth was responsible for the Tragedy of Duscur. Forgetting his nausea, he felt his blood boil at the sight of the man desperately trying to play down Byleth's birthright. Dimitri wasn't pleased with what was happening to Byleth, but he did take in some pleasure in seeing how that man would have to soon acknowledge that he made a terrible mistake and that Byleth is far more important than he would ever be.
"Not yet," Lord Rodrigue chimed in, and the little pleasure quickly drained from the prince. "It is only a matter of time before the church declares her as one." The other noble backed down with a growl but the small silence did descend over everyone.
"It is because of this that I recommend we act fast," Margrave Gauiter said and pulled everyone's attention on to him. "As we all know the soon to be saintess was once a close playmate of His Highness, and that she is the current professor of the Blue Lions." Dimitri tightly clenched his jaw less a scream escaped him, and a warning glare from Lord Rodrigue kept that jaw tightly shut. He bawled his fists tightly and he could feel his knuckles screaming out, but he didn't care.
"Because of this connection," the margrave continued, despite Dimitri internally demanding him to stop. "I fully support the saintess becoming the queen consort."
All at once his anger left him and he nearly vomited right then and there. He had imagined getting such support countless times, but not like this. In silence he listened as arguments broke out over this. Those in support only talked about the need to secure the Crest of Flames and the Hero Relic, none of them acknowledged any of her good traits. Those that were against, were nobles with eligible daughters to be queen consort, but even they agreed to accept her as an official concubine. Not a single person cared to ask Dimitri about his feelings on the matter. His feelings for Byleth were the last pure thing in his life and they were tainting it.
It was well into the evening when Byleth and Claude departed after taking a walk around the monastery at Claude's behest. That birthday had been one of a lot of highs and some powerful lows, but for that moment with Claude she would suffer all those lows ten times over again. The only thing that could have possibly made that day better was if Dimitri had been there, but she tried to ignore that thought.
Once she was done talking to Claude, she was supposed to go to Felix room, but she was just too tired and so Claude agreed to pass along the message. She wanted to spend more time with her friends, but she was at her limit, and she hoped they would understand. Just as she neared her room, she spied someone waiting for her outside it and she froze. Unwillingly she recalled her encounter with Edelgard the night before and she didn't know what she would do if it was the same young woman again.
Despite her exhaustion begging her to step forward, she was cemented in place. Her mind raced with several possible scenarios that could happen with Edelgard and she was disheartened to discover that none of them were pleasant. With potential disappointment (at best) waiting for her, she refused to take another step towards her room and contemplated other possible sleeping areas.
"Relax," Sothis chimed in, "that person is way to tall to be that rude princess." Relief washed over Byleth when she realized that Sothis was right. While that person could not be Edelgard it did not rule out the possibility of them being Hubert. Hubert was not a pleasant alternative, but the thought of having to interact with him didn't bother her nearly as much as the idea of having to deal with Edelgard or the archbishop.
Though greatly relieved she still walked with slow and careful steps. Her mind raced with several new scenarios, and she grumbled multiple complaints, as she was just to tired to deal with whatever threat Hubert was going to use. Sothis' words of encouragement and suggestions helped to make the trek to her room somewhat bearable.
Once she was close enough, she was able to discover that it wasn't Hubert, but Ferdinand instead. As her brain stopped functioning at the sight of an unexpected man, so did her feet. Slow to start her brain started to think up new reasons as to why he would visit her; and unlike with the two people she imaged earlier, she pleased to imagine nothing but pleasant situations.
"Professor!" she heard someone shout, breaking her out of her thoughts. She saw Ferdinand jogging towards her, and it was only then that she realized she had stopped walking. By the wave of his hand and his smile, it was clear that he wasn't bothered about coming to her.
"Happy birthday!" he said once he stood before her and presented her with a small gift. Unknowingly she stared at him for a bit before taking it. He wasn't the only student outside of her class to give her a gift, but he was the only one to do it when she was alone.
She didn't think of any reasons to be concerned as she went about opening the gift without a second thought. A nostalgic scent greeted her, and her eyes widen as she saw the beautifully decorated bag of tea leaves. Slowly she looked away from the gift to look at the giver, who seemed to be quite pleased with himself.
"It is a Hresvelg Blend." Her eyes widen at the name, before a gentle smiled formed on her lips as she went back to looking at the tea. A memory of King Lambert flashed before her mind, and she smiled. It was an incredibly expensive blend of tea that she only ever got to have at Castle Blaiddyd. It was a blend she liked but because of the price she never grew too attached to it, but to have some of her own, to taste it once again, it was one of her most precious gifts that she received that day.
"I am sure, Prince Dimitri have given you this blend several times but-"
"He's never given me any." She interrupted without thinking. None of her friend have gotten her tea as they all knew it was pointless as she was quick to secure her supply once she became established at Garreg Mach. Though she would have never refused any tea had they bought her some.
He stared at her for a few seconds before shaking his head and sighing. "Really…His Highness…," he mumbled under his breath, and she choose to not comment. "Regardless, this blend has a unique flavor that you will not find in other teas."
With a smile she thanked him for the gift and thought that would be the end of that, but it wasn't. He was silent as he hovered around her. Normally she wouldn't have minded, but she was so tired. Her exhausted mind tried to figure out a polite way to leave, but she was struggling to recall "proper" etiquette as well as finding it hard to care for such procedures.
Luckily for her, he came to her rescue by speaking first, but unfortunately it wasn't to wish her a goodnight like she was hoping. "I do apologize, but I did not come to see you just to present a gift." She struggled to keep her face blank. While it wasn't uncommon for students, outside of her own, to come to her she did find it strange that Ferdinand would come to her. While they were good acquaintances as they did have tea together at least once a week, he also highly respected Professor Manuela, so Byleth was utterly clueless as to why he would come to her over his professor.
It was only after her prompting him did he finally speak, "I do apologize for the trivial question, but in what ways do you assume that I resemble a bee?" She didn't respond and simply stared at him, unsure if she heard him correctly.
It was only when he started to squirm, did she answer, al bit hesitantly. "You're a hard worker?" It wasn't a haphazard answer. She might be more familiar with him than most of the other students at Garreg Mach, but she was at least confident enough to say very few worked harder than him.
His bashful smile fell way and was replaced with a frown. As she cocked her head to the side, he looked away. She wanted to ask him what was wrong, but his mumbling stopped her, "I thought so too…" A silence settled over them as he seemed to be lost in his own little world.
As if reaching some kind of answer, he shook his head. "No, this is something I am supposed to figure out on my own." She recognized that he was staying that more to himself and so she chose to say nothing. With a firm nod he turned back to her and had a small smile.
"I do apologize for wasting your time." She shook her head no. "I shall leave you alone now. Have a goodnight." Having said that he offered her a grand bow before leaving.
He didn't get very far before she called out to him. "Ferdinand, if you ever need to speak to someone, I am always available," she said.
With a firm nod he respond, "I shall keep that in mind. Thank you."
A/N:
When I returned to writing this story, I didn't expect for there to be such a large gap in between chapters but this might be the norm for some time, I do apologize.