Posted April 18, 2021

A/N: The end of "Chuck vs the Truth" had one most significant WTF-moments in the series. It was a funny episode with a lot of good pre-RST Charah, but then…

Cue "Fresh Feeling" by Eels…

At Wienerlicious, Chuck bared his feelings to his CIA cover-girlfriend. "Sarah, you know when you think you're going to die and your whole life is supposed to flash in front of you?" [It's going to happen! He's going to kiss her!] "That didn't exactly happen for me yesterday. In fact, mostly it was just a list that I saw—a list of stuff that I haven't done and things that I haven't had a chance to say." [A list? Whatever. He's going to say it!] "So today… Today, I want to start crossing things off of my list. And this is the first thing that I promised myself that I'd do. We need to break up."

**record scratch** What!?

For Charah fans, Chuck's list was supposed to say "end the cover and start a real relationship with Sarah." Earlier that episode, Chuck and Sarah had gotten in bed together to "sleep" together for cover. He could've ended the cover part of the relationship a different way, by kissing Sarah, right where as they stood in Wienerlicious. He could've kissed her like he was about to die, and we know she'd have reciprocated with as much passion. Sarah would have an open invitation to sleep over more often, for his protection, for cover, or for other things.

Chuck's corrected list didn't happen. It would be twenty-seven more episodes with the two of them on the run (and an IOU from Morgan). Fortunately, a big Charah kiss came in the very next episode in a different way, in front of the Bryce Bomb as they thought they were going to die. Unfortunately, the big kiss happened after Chuck went out with Lou twice, when a tact team was about to find them, and with Bryce "chaperoning." (Even though he didn't know he was inside the "bomb", it was less romantic than the secret base in "Chuck vs the Gravitron.") That all made it uncomfortable, so Charah remained in limbo for about forty more episodes.

This AU story starts the moment after the "record scratch" moment. It won't make you wait until chapter 48 because there will only be 10. This story isn't UST or RST (Unresolved or Resolved Sexual Tension). It's sort of RUST, but it's not oxidized, so maybe it's URST. What does that mean? Chuck won't be able to tell if it's non-oxidized RUST or URST. You'll see.

Disclaimer: Nobody else owns anything here, so why would I?
Disclaimer 2: No beta. However, if you PM me issues, I'll fix them. There's no expiration date.

Thursday, November 15, 2007
Buy More Plaza
Burbank, CA

Stepping out of Wienerlicious, Chuck could barely believe it, even though he had been standing right there. In fact, he was the person who had done it. He had actually broken up with Sarah Walker and was no longer fake-dating her. Now, he could actually ask someone on a real date.

It would be the first time since he and Jill were atop a Ferris wheel, back when he was a student at Stanford. He has been on several setups that never made it to a second date. Sarah had asked him on their first date. They were at Buy More, and Morgan had accepted before he had a chance. It was fake anyway, featuring a car chase and a bomb. This time, he would be the one asking, and it would be a real date.

He wished the person he was asking was Sarah, but she told him, while under the effects of truth serum, they didn't have a future. That meant for him to find someone to share a future with, he needed to find someone else. Breaking up with Sarah was the first step to checking something off the list he wanted to do before he died: a real date with a real girlfriend who he could share a future with. He couldn't handle having a cover-relationship with Sarah while dating someone else. It wasn't fair to either the woman who meant everything to him or the woman who would mean everything to him.

Considering how many times he had had more than one date with a woman since college (or more than zero blind-dates with a woman), he couldn't handle the balancing act of a non-exclusive relationship. He knew that after so long, he was barely ready for one real-girlfriend. Trying to balance a real-girlfriend at the same time as a cover-girlfriend was too much for him. He also knew better than to scare away a woman by calling the relationship exclusive before she was ready. That didn't mean it wouldn't be exclusive for him on day one.

Everything about Lou seemed like she could be that woman. She seemed to want to be that woman. She named a sandwich after him. He didn't know people could do that. It was amazing; he was honored. Now, since he was no longer cover-dating Sarah, he could ask Lou out on a first date.

Chuck started across the parking lot to Lou's deli, quickly glancing over at Buy More. He saw Morgan's bike was there because he was working. Chuck supposed he should tell someone else about ending it with Sarah before asking Lou out. His relationship with Sarah was never real, but everyone outside of the CIA and NSA thought it was. Sometimes, Chuck almost thought that because it always felt like they had something. The problem was if he asked Lou out without letting anyone know he was no longer with Sarah, it would be like he was stepping out on her, even though it had only been a fake-relationship. Everyone who wasn't a spy would think he was cheating on Sarah. She didn't deserve that. That was the point of breaking up with Sarah like he did. He had to make it look like something he would do.

Who would he tell? Deep down, Chuck knew he had to let either Ellie or Morgan know. Telling one of those two people would make this momentous change in his life "real." Everyone else would find out somehow, but that didn't matter. Only after telling one of them would the fake-relationship really be over.

Ellie wouldn't be let out of the hospital from her exposure to the poisonous Pentothal cocktail until later today, and Chuck didn't want to distress her as she was about to get out. She wouldn't understand his reason for breaking up with Sarah without him telling her it had always been fake. There was no way he could do that because she would completely freak out about the fact he's been working with the CIA and NSA. It didn't matter that the Intersect was top secret. If she was cleared, he never wanted to have that conversation with her.

That left Morgan. His little buddy would react in his typical over-the-top way, but in the end, he would back his friend. He'd end up agreeing with Chuck's decision because Lou's a professional sandwich-maker.

Chuck entered Buy More and spotted Morgan with his back turned, talking to a customer. Chuck didn't want to interrupt him actually doing his job as a salesman, so he decided to give the slacker a couple minutes. Chuck would wait in the break room and check whether Morgan was finished in a few minutes.

When Chuck walked into the break room, Casey was alone and closed his flip phone quickly. Chuck supposed he'd have to tell Casey about the break-up of the fake relationship—or maybe Sarah would.

No, Chuck decided. He broke-up with Sarah to take charge of his list. Like he needed to tell Morgan or Ellie, he needed to tell his other protector. Instead of ignoring Casey by going to his locker or snack machine, he went over and stood at the big man's table. "Hey, Casey."

"Bartowski," the gruff agent responded as he stood up. "What are you doing here today? I thought you'd been putting up 'welcome home' banners for Ellie's getting out of the hospital."

"Awesome is with her now and is bringing her home in a few hours. I don't want to be there in case they decide to 'celebrate' her return. I'm not scheduled for today, though. I swapped with Morgan so he wouldn't put on a 'welcome home' spectacle. Ellie wouldn't want that. With Morgan here, Ellie wouldn't kill him." Chuck had done what is necessary to move on with his life, away from the woman who said there was no future with him. Morgan needed to do the same. No truth serum was necessary to find out what Ellie thought of him. It was easy to tell she loathed him, Ellie only put up with Morgan because he's brother's best friend.

Casey indicated that understood the convoluted explanation with a grunt. (It was a number four: Why do you put up with Morgan?) He had been around Morgan enough at Buy More to know it often was a good idea to try to reign in Morgan's enthusiasm. The NSA Agent restated his question more assertively. "What are you doing here, if you don't have to be?"

"I had something important to do, to get on with my life." Casey looked skeptical for a second. He looked like he was going to throw Chuck in a locker so he wouldn't do something the NSA agent thought unwise. It was hard to tell. To prevent any drastic action, Chuck quickly said, "I know. I know. I have the Intersect. I'm not going anywhere. I just mean my personal life."

Casey's skepticism morphed into complete doubt, like he had no faith in Chuck being able to change his life. At least it didn't look like Chuck would have to call Sarah to pick the lock to get him out of his locker. Chuck didn't want to argue that he could have a personal life, so he said something that would matter to the NSA agent. "You'll want to do a background check on someone…Lou Palone."

That didn't phase the snooping agent. Chuck wondered if Sarah had already told him in the few minutes it took for Chuck to walk over here. The professional stalker from the "No Secrets Agency" said, "She's the deli shop owner that has a crush on you for some stupid reason. I ran an initial check the day she first came into the Buy More with a broken phone. She doesn't have any outstanding warrants and is caught up on her taxes. I stopped by her restaurant. It was founded in 1980, making it a good place. Who knows how it was founded before she was born, that was the year this country got back on the right track by electing the Gipper. Also, Palone makes a good pastrami sandwich."

On one hand, Chuck was surprised that Casey did a check so quickly after Lou walked into the Buy More. Did he check every person who came into the store? On the other hand, Sarah and Lou were the only two that ever seemed interested in him. They both had a broken phone, which he fixed.

Maybe bringing in a broken phone was seen as a vulnerability that enemy agents could exploit. It was more effective than what Mei-Ling did with a fake delivery or what La Ciudad's muscle did, because Casey promptly banged their heads in.

Casey had tried to kill Sarah on Chuck's first date with her. Chuck didn't want that to happen to Lou. No one else was like Sarah, able to do amazing things like stop cars that were trying to run her down. Lou wouldn't stand a chance. Chuck said, "You'll want to do a more thorough check because I'm going to ask her on a date."

"Why would you do some dumb thing like that? You're dating Walker."

"Not anymore—not that I ever really was. It doesn't matter what you call it now because I broke up with her—or fake-broke-up our fake-relationship."

Casey grunted again. It was a number two. That was a grunt Chuck was very familiar with. Casey used it whenever he thought Chuck was being an idiot. The experienced NSA agent was wrong this time. Chuck was moving on with his life.

Then, Casey gave out yet another grunt. Chuck thought he knew that one, too. He didn't hear it as much. It was the number thirteen. It was the one Casey gave when he was surprised or confused. He almost never admitted that, but it had happened. Fortunately, Casey explained his reason. "I thought there wasn't a problem. Walker said she didn't compromise herself because she was trained to withstand Pentothal. If she—"

"She what?" Chuck interrupted. He had a sinking feeling that his plan to start checking off his list wasn't starting the right way. His first step was the wrong direction.

"Pentothal, Numbnuts. Walker and I are real spies. We've both been trained. It takes a little more than that to break us. Payne's cocktail was poisonous, but until it killed us, neither of us were talking about secrets."

"So when I asked her a question while she was under the effects of truth serum, she could lie?"

"Of course. What exactly did you ask her?"

Chuck knew for a fact he had made a big mistake with Sarah. For her, he could wait. She was definitely worth it. He answered Casey, "That's not important. You know what I said earlier about Lou. Forget it. I've got to go." He didn't explain himself further and hurried down the hall outside the break room to leave the store.

At the front door, Chuck was stopped by Morgan. "Hey, Chuck. I heard you were here. I thought you were off today, because we switched. Was I supposed to work today anyway?"

Chuck had originally come into the store to tell Morgan about the break-up, but with this new information about another of Sarah's super-spy abilities, there was no need to tell him anything. He told Morgan, "You're right, you weren't working, so I'm not. Pretend I was never here. I just needed to get something from the back."

"You know, if you ever need something from your locker, I can get inside it, so I can get it for you."

It seems if Casey had locked Chuck in his locker, he could have called Morgan. That's assuming it had been Chuck's locker. Sarah was a better lock pick than Casey, which he even admitted while withstanding Pentothal. (That must not have been a big enough secret.) He responded to Morgan, "Um. Ok. Thanks for the offer. It isn't important now. I need to take care of a couple things right now. Bye."

Chuck was already outside by the time he heard his friend say, "Bye, Chuck."

Twenty minutes later, Chuck was standing and staring outside the sandwich stop when a familiar presence appeared at his side. There was the smell of sausage on her clothing, but that never completely hid the wonderful "ocean breeze" scent of her shampoo.

Sarah's angelic voice broke him out of his frozen stare. "Are you ok, Chuck?"

He nodded in response.

"What's wrong? Was she foolish, rejecting you? She should've known better."

"No. I haven't talked to her… I'm not going to ask her out."

"You're not? You've just been standing here for twenty-one minutes. What are you doing here?"

"I'm going to break-up with her, and I'm trying to get up my nerve. You were the first person I've ever broken up with because you're only the second person I've been on more than one date with. I screwed up with you. I want to do it better this time."

"You said you hadn't asked her out. Why would you break-up with her?"

"I thought… After I said something I wish I never said to you… I'm very sorry about that. Putting you on the spot, I made a huge mistake. I didn't understand."

Chuck turned his head and looked at the beautiful woman who was standing next to him. Her eyes looked… He didn't know how to describe it. Concern? She shouldn't be concerned with Chuck next to her. He never had any concern with Sarah at his side. Fearful? She had nothing to fear from him. Hopeful? Chuck hoped it was hopeful.

Who was he kidding? He could never tell with Sarah. Sometimes it seemed like under the cover, they had something real. Other times, he couldn't read the inscrutable spy. Yesterday, he put her on the spot with a question, thinking he could finally get the truth because of the truth serum. Now, he knew a spy like her could withhold the truth anyway. He shouldn't have made a life-altering decision based on something that wasn't true.

Sarah asked, "What changed in the last twenty-two minutes?"

"I went into Buy More to tell Morgan that we are no more."

Sarah's brow formed a little wrinkle, which Chuck always thought was adorable. "Why would you need to tell Morgan?"

"I had to tell someone to make it real. Otherwise, people would think I was cheating on you. I'd never do that, no matter what our relationship really was or wasn't."

"So Morgan knows you and I…" Sarah didn't complete the sentence.

"No. I changed my mind before I had the chance to tell him."

"You changed your mind? Does that mean… Does that mean you don't want to break-up with me?" Chuck could tell that time. Sarah sounded hopeful. Why would she be hopeful? She must have been lying yesterday. Why would she lie? Why did she ever lie about them? He was harmless, and not in the "Mostly Harmless" way of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

"No. I never really wanted to break-up with you. I thought I had to because of what you said. But in the store, I ran into Casey, and he told me you can lie under the effect of truth serum. That means everything I did today before that was a mistake. Sarah, would you take me back? Please take me back."

Chuck had no trouble understanding Sarah's next reaction. Her huge smile completely lit up before she cupped his jaw and kissed him fully on the lips. It was amazing. Their kisses had felt special before, but they were never like that. For a few weeks, they had kissed for cover, but always on the cheek. This was a real, full kiss. It was better than he ever imagined. This was real… or was it? He didn't want to ask because to ask he'd have to end the kiss.

After at least a minute, Chuck finally pulled back and had to ask. He repeated his question from the day before, "Our thing under the undercover thing. Is this ever going anywhere?"

Unlike her answer before, Sarah answered with a kiss. It was just as amazing as the last one—more so. With the wonderful feeling of Sarah's lips on his, he could barely think. It was longer than the last one. For a minute or more, he forgot what he was asking about. Eventually, his brain rebooted, and he managed to realize that Sarah hadn't actually answered his question, so he stopped again.

"Wait. Wait. That isn't an answer. You answered me yesterday. Sarah, our thing under the undercover thing. Is this ever going anywhere?"

"I'm sorry, Chuck. No."

The joy in Chuck's heart disappeared, but Sarah saw the reaction and brought it back with a third kiss. Chuck didn't know what it meant, but at the moment, he didn't care. When their tongues touched… It was the best he felt since Stanford. He didn't ever remember feeling like that. As the two of them deepened the kiss in the middle of the sidewalk, he knew whatever was going on, it had to be real.

This third kiss didn't go on forever, though. As far as Chuck was concerned, he would have been happy if it had. Instead, there was an interruption from a big man standing next to them in a white smock. "You two need to stop doing that here. Lou isn't saying anything, but I can tell it's bothering her, seeing you two eating each other's faces through the front window of her sandwich shop."

Chuck was mortified at what the man had said. Chuck had come over here to "break-up" with Lou, who he was never actually dating. He was just being courteous because he had told her that Sarah and he were complicated. He and Sarah were still complicated, but before, he had left the door slightly open to Lou. He didn't want to do that to her. By "breaking up" with her, he'd close that door. However, instead of closing the door on Lou, he ended up making a public display with Sarah. Kissing Sarah made him forget himself and do something that was not nice to Lou. As a result, they were being told to leave by the burly man who worked inside. They needed to do what he said.

Sarah was not embarrassed or frightened like Chuck. She stepped right up to the man and said, "Or what?"

A metal sound unexpectedly rattled across the pavement. Chuck looked at the sidewalk and it was a big knife! Oddly, it wasn't one of Sarah's fancy throwing knives.

The tough man didn't look so sure of himself, and he no longer looked "tough." He held up his empty hand, which a moment before had held a knife he used at work to cut meat for sandwiches. He hadn't threatened them with it. He had innocently carried it from where he was working inside. He probably hadn't realized he had it. Now, it was on the sidewalk. "How did that get there?"

Sarah responded. "You were holding it, so I eliminated the threat."

Before the situation escalated with the man sobbing on the ground from Sarah's over-protectiveness, Chuck interjected, "Please tell Lou that I'm very sorry—Chuck is very sorry. It's still complicated, but that's not changing." He wrapped an arm around Sarah. "I'm with her." Pointing at the butcher knife a few yards away, he said, "Also, you should wash that before you use it." Chuck turned to Sarah. "I'm confused. We should go someplace private and talk."

"I know where we could 'talk,'" Sarah smiled. She took Chuck's hand and quickly led him to her car.

Before they got in, Chuck said, "I suppose my sandwich namesake is disappearing from the menu."

"Good. That was weird. I read Casey's initial risk assessment, and in it he said naming food after someone who wasn't even a boyfriend was a sign of someone who's possibly unstable."

Casey hadn't told Chuck all of that. After hearing that risk, Chuck no longer had any desire to date Lou or even get one of her sandwiches. He dealt with enough unstable Buy Morons. He didn't want to date someone like that. After kissing Sarah several times like they had done, he didn't want to date anyone but Sarah. However, he also didn't want Sarah or Casey to kill Lou because they considered her a threat. Not everyone could defend themselves like Sarah.

He had a thought. "You're working at Wienerlicious. Do you have to go back to work?"

"You're more important than that job. With you standing here, I knew something was wrong, so before I came over, I told Scooter I'm done for the day. He's covering the rest of my shift." She peeled out and weaved them through the parking lot to some place they could "talk."

A/N: "Fresh Feeling" is a better song now. It came out in 2001, and I believe it was not on an LP record. That means no scratches.

Sarah left her cover-job for her other job with her cover-boyfriend. But was he still her "cover" boyfriend at the time? Where is she taking Chuck?

In "Chuck & Sarah vs Their Next Adventure," chapter 10, the main in the smock's name is Tony. In doesn't go so well for him.

In progress readers: This "parallel-AU" story is going to mostly alternate posting with the canon-compatible "Chuck vs the In Between," over the same time period, 1x08-2x04. Chapters of that story will always be set "in between" episodes. This story will not line up the same way because it will have chapters during some episodes. Neither of these alternating stories relies on the other because the other is canon-compatible and this AU. Many canon events will still be in the background, but there's obviously one big change.