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Chapter 3: Desire

He was going to do this.

He was going to walk across the distance between Luke's truck and the huge double oak doors of Paris Gellar's mansion and ring the doorbell. He was going to do that as soon as he overcame this insane urge to get back into his uncle's beat up truck and drive out of Hartford as fast as he could. Paris was just a girl and he was just trying to make things right. He could do it.

Jess Mariano was a lot of things. A coward wasn't one of them.

Clenching and unclenching his fists, he stalked over to the door and pressed the bell firmly. The door swung open and revealed a young Latino woman. He gave her a half smile and introduced himself. "I'm Jess. Is Paris home?"

The woman smiled and ushered him in. "Senorita Paris is in her room. Wait here senor and I will go get her."

Jess nodded and watched the maid climb up the winded staircase to the top floor. When she was out of sight, he sighed and ran a hand through his hair. There was no turning back now. Paris was just another girl and he was going to explain his behavior the night before and leave, hoping she didn't think he was a total jackass.

He wondered why he cared what she thought at all.

Before he could follow that train of thought for too long, a voice jolted him out of his reverie and he found himself staring at a curious, artificially done up blonde woman in a bright, eye blinding suit. "Hello. I'm Renee Gellar. I usually have the produce delivered from the kitchen - "

Jess wanted to scoff at the woman's presumptuousness but merely gave her a small, polite smile. "I'm not the produce guy."

"Oh," she said looking flustered. "You must be that new gardener that Mar - "

"He's not the gardener, Mother," Paris' voice floated in the room and Jess turned around to see her coming down the stairs, still dressed in her Chilton uniform. She came to stand in front of her mother, beside Jess and gave him a smile. "He's a friend. Excuse me, I have a guest."

Jess could see that Renee was shocked and somewhat disgusted that her daughter was hanging around a guy who obviously looked like the help to her and tried to hide his grin. He always got a kick out of making somebody so arrogant squirm but he knew that if he wanted to smooth things with Paris, he couldn't start in on her mother. Although from the look in her eyes, he could tell she probably wouldn't mind

After a minute Renee, who looking like she was going to cause scene, left the two teenagers alone. Jess turned to Paris, hands in the pockets of his jeans and his eyebrows raised expectantly. "Hey."

"We can go into my Dad's study," she replied shortly, walked across the foyer and opened a door to the right.

He sighed, knowing that this conversation wasn't going to start off well. Once he entered the quintessential study of a rich man – one with dark, heavy drapes, a small fireplace, books walled up a long the shelf and a mahogany desk he turned to her knowing that with Paris, he had to get straight to the point. "We need to talk."

She crossed her arms over her chest and eyed him with indifference. "That's what I thought we were going to do. Hence the purpose of this visit, right Jess? You came here to tell me something. Or did you just want to bolt out of here again without an explanation?"

He took in a deep breath. "Okay, maybe I deserve that. But I came here to apologize."

"For what?" she asked curiously.

"For cutting our date short, for running out of here and for hurting your feelings."

"What makes you think you hurt my feelings?" she asked angrily. "What makes you think you have any effect on my feelings? That's awfully arrogant of you. Because you didn't hurt my feelings you just…you made me mad."

"Well anger is a feeling you know," he quipped. When she shot daggers at him, he held up in hands in a gesture of peace. "Look, I'm sorry. It was wrong to run out like that. I'm not really sure why I did."

After a minute she uncrossed her arms and lifted her shoulders in a careless shrug. "Apology accepted. Is that all you wanted?"

"Why are you making this so hard?" he asked with a frustrated sigh.

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to inconvenience you. Maybe you should find someone who'll be a little easier on you, okay? If you really don't have anything more to say then please leave. I have a lot of studying to do." She looked at him her eyes betraying nothing and her jaw set determined.

He almost growled at her inability to understand how uncomfortable he was around her but caught himself before he said anything stupid. Instead, he looked at her evenly hoping that he could get through her without being chewed out. "Right, you have to study. You have places to go, Paris. You're very set in that path to Harvard, right?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" she asked irritated.

"A lot. I'm not sure what I want to do after I graduate. I don't think that far ahead  - it tends to make me depressed," he explained and closed the distance between them, standing face to face so that he could see the different emotions flickering in her eyes. "But you – you're set for life. We're that different, Paris. Your mother thought I was the help!"

"I really don't care what my mother thinks," she interjected.

He ignored that and got to his point. "And I think that maybe we were headed toward this thing, whatever it is, without thinking. It doesn't change the fact that I like you. But maybe you're not ready for the kind of relationship I have in mind."

She nodded slowly. "Oh so you're doing this for me. Well thanks, Jess. It's really sweet of you. But I can take care of myself very well. In fact, I knew exactly what it was I was getting myself into when went out yesterday."

He let his voice go down a notch when he saw the flicker of fire in her chocolate brown pools. "You did?"

Her gaze wavered from his eyes to his lips for a fraction of a second and he smirked when he heard her breath catch in her throat. He searched her wide eyes and then reached up to push a wayward strand of hair of her cheek. Letting his knuckles graze lightly across the soft skin of her cheek. Unconsciously, she licked her bottom lip and he felt the desire to kiss her shoot through him. Her voice came out in a breathy whisper. "Yes, I did."

Really? He studied her face, assessing how serious she was about her statement. She stared back openly, not moving but letting her eyes flit over his face in wonderment. She wants to play with fire, does she? Well then I'm going to have to teach her that she's going to get burnt. There's no way around it.

Jess realized that his intentions had changed. He was going to show Paris what it was like to be desired and wanted. He nodded slowly, letting his hand cup the side of her face. "Okay then. Paris, I'm hoping that we - "

"If the words 'still be friends' come out of your mouth, I'm going to slug you," she warned him as he let the pad of his thumb brushed against her cheek, making her skin come alive with a pretty hue of pink.

"I wasn't going to say that," he whispered softly, meeting her gaze. "I was going to ask you to give this another chance."

He saw the uncertainty on her face as she bit her lower lip. "Maybe I don't want to."

Jess brought his other hand to her shoulder, letting his fingers trail down the smooth column of her neck. Her eyes fluttered and her lips parted slightly, invitingly. He gave her a small, expressive smile. "I know you want me, Paris."

She opened her mouth to protest but he quickly cut of her remark by crushing his lips to hers, to demonstrate his point. Almost immediately, she melted against him, her fingers grasping the material of his shirt as he deepened the kiss. She moaned into his mouth, sending his blood rushing through his body and heart beating like a runaway train.

This is what they wanted. He just hoped that when it ended, they would both be left unscathed. 

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Somewhere in the nether recesses of Paris' mind, she wondered when it was exactly she had fallen in lust with Jess Mariano. She wondered how she could have ever missed the lazy smile, the rugged, unkempt good looks and those penetrating eyes that seemed to regard her with just the right amount of amusement, circumspection and interest. No one looked at her like that.

She decided she could analyze everything later because right now, she was enjoying this moment in her life way too much to be thinking at all.

Lust feels good, was her last thought before she returned all her attention to the kiss, letting her hands run up, over Jess' chest and then letting her fingers tangle in his hair. She'd been kissed before, but never like this. Never with so much want and desperation. It definitely wasn't the most romantic kiss but it made her weak in the knees. It was tongue, teeth and hands twining, nipping and tangling over and over again until blood was drumming in her ears and she tore her lips away, gasping for breath.

As their breathing returned to normal they remained quiet, unable to tear their gazes away and still clinging to each other. Finally, she let her hands slip from his hair, lingering over the firmness of his chest before she stopped touching him complexly taking a step away from him and clasping her hands together.

He stayed rooted in his spot, eyes watching her every move and one eyebrow cocked in amusement. His lips curled at the corner. "I told you so."

Paris' eyes narrowed dangerously and she wondered how she could go from kissing him one minute to wanting to slap him the next. "Is that why you kissed me? To prove a point?"

"No," he replied taking a step closer. She took one backwards. He smirked and took another one, trapping her between him and the wood-paneled wall beside the door. His fingers were grazing the skin near her collarbone, slipping under the fabric of her Chilton blazer and the blouse underneath. "I kissed you because I wanted to. Proving my point was just icing on the cake."

"If that's all you wanted to do then please leave," she replied, ignoring his ministrations.

He held her gaze levelly. "Do you really want me to go?"

"I want you to stop touching me."

"Why?" His voice was low, caressing her senses.

Her breathing hitched as she felt his other hand come up between them and unhook her blazer. His fingers played with the top button her blouse and then slowly eased the material apart. Her answer came out weaker than she intended. "Because it's distracting."

"But it feels good, doesn't it?" he asked softly bringing his face closer and dropping butterfly kisses on the side of her face as one hand continued to graze across the skin above her breasts. She clenched her hands at her sides, trying to keep from clinging to him again. His lips grazed her earlobe. "What do you really want, Paris?"

She closed her eyes and her mouth moved on it's own accord. "You."

Immediately he pulled away, taking his hands away and causing her eyes to jerk open in surprise. The jerk was smiling broadly, smugly. "Great, then I'll pick you up tonight at seven."

"Wha - " she said disoriented as she followed him out of her father's study. She was not going to be coerced into a date because of her hormones. "Jess wait. I never said that I'd go out with you."

He reached the main door, turned and gave her a knowing smile. "You didn't have to. Wear something casual. Don't want you mussing up those expensive clothes."

"Jess!" her protest fell on deaf years, as he closed the door behind him, leaving her flushed from their kiss and confused about what had just happened.

When the maid had told her that Jess had come to see her, she had made a resolve to listen to what he had to say and then ask him to leave. She never expected to make out with him in her father's study and then be cornered into a date. She hated that he seemed to make her lose control.

Her fingers immediately came up to her swollen lips and in spite of herself she smiled. Kissing Jess felt extremely good and if they were going to go on a date again the there would be a lot more of it, if she could help it. Her grin grew bigger as she sighed dreamily and headed to her room again. She wasn't one to get caught up in the romance of a new relationship but her elation couldn't be helped. She wasn't one to get carried away and think of making out with boys all night long either but she suspected that Jess Mariano would have the effect on any girl with a pulse.

For the first time in her life, Paris Gellar felt desirable – and she loved it.