Chapter Nineteen-Pressure

A/N: Gosh, I took forever getting this out. School is a terrible thing. ;) Well, here it is. Hope you like it...

"Oh, this totally awesome!" Paige gushed as she and Ellie walked to Paige's house that afternoon when school had ended for the day. "I bet you're so excited, El."

The whole walk to the Michalchuk residence, Paige had been overjoyed that Ellie was going to the Spring Fling. And with Jimmy nonetheless.

"It is pretty cool," Ellie agreed, trying not to freak out like Paige so obviously was.

"We so have to get dresses and I'll do your makeup for you if you want," Paige suggested.

Ellie smiled. She wondered if this was what it was like to have a real friend. She was surprised Paige had stuck around this long, to be honest. She was surprised that Paige had ever been around in the first place. She didn't know where she would be right now if she hadn't had Paige to help her...if Paige had never found about her cutting.

Would they still be at each other's throats? It was almost mind-boggling to Ellie. She figured that everything that had happened to her over the weeks had happened for a reason. A reason she still couldn't quite understand yet, but she decided she'd figure it out with time.

"Do we really have to shop for dresses?" Ellie asked in an I'd-rather-strangle-myself tone.

Paige shot her a glare. "Of course we have to shop for dresses! It's the best part of dances!"

Ellie laughed. "Even better than the actual dance?"

She got a dream look in her eyes and replied, "Well, except for when I'm dancing with Spin. It's like—"

Ellie burst out laughing. "Spinner can dance?"

Paige rolled her eyes. "Okay, when I'm with Spin. It's magical, almost. Like—"

"Ew, okay, that's enough," Ellie demanded, shuddering.

They came to the Michalchuk house and Paige led her to the kitchen, where Ellie made herself at home.

"Have you thought about what kind of dress you want?" Paige asked, grabbing a couple glasses and pouring each of them some diet soda.

"A black one?" Ellie suggested, not really wanting to think about this.

"Oh, come on, El, spice it up a bit. Doesn't black get just a little bit boring?"

Ellie shook her head. "Not really."

They talked a bit more, and then Ellie decided it was time for her to head home.

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She walked into her house to find her mother passed out on the couch.

"DAD!" Ellie called, and then heard footsteps coming down the stairs momentarily.

"What happened?" she asked, gesturing towards her mother, as soon as he reached the bottom stair.

"She's been like this all afternoon," he explained. "Ellie...come with me. We have some things we need to talk about."

He led her into the kitchen and Ellie slowly took a seat. By the tone of her father's voice, she didn't like where this was headed.

"What is it, dad?"

"I think it would be best if...if your mother and I...separated for a little while."

Ellie's jaw dropped. "What?"

"Things have changed, El. We've both decided. We need some time apart."

"Time apart?" she shouted, outraged. "You've been out of the damned country for months! Without me OR mom! And you need some time apart?! Are you kidding me?"

"Ellie, calm down, sweetie..."

"NO! I've lived in this hellhole for almost a year with my pathetic excuse for a mother! WITHOUT you! And now you're just going to leave us?! AGAIN?"

"Eleanor, you know I'd never leave you. I've been looking for a place—"

"A PLACE?! You haven't even been here two days! Can you even AFFORD a new place?"

"I have it under control," he said calmly. "I just need you to stay with your mother for a little while, while I get things sorted out."

Tears made their way down Ellie's cheeks. "You just said you weren't going to leave me!"

"Ellie..."

"NO! You know what? Forget it. Forget you and this screwed up family."

"Let me explain..."

Before he could finish, she had already stormed up the stairs to her bedroom.

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Ellie slammed the door behind her, wiping tears from her eyes angrily. She couldn't take this anymore. It was a constant rollercoaster. Some days she felt like she was on top of the world, and then the next day she was knocked down again. Things needed to change.

She threw herself on her bed, sighing in frustration, trying desperately to keep herself from having a breakdown. It had all seemed so simple when she had thought about her dad coming home. Her mother would stop drinking and become more of a real mother. Her father would tell her stories about Kabul and they'd be one, happy family. Just like she had always hoped.

Things had done the exact opposite.

She had always thought so highly of her dad, but now...now he was just being selfish. A real parent should try to work things out, right? So why was he running away from the family he helped create?

Ellie's eyes lingered towards her nightstand. The red letters of her digital alarm clock told her it was almost five-thirty. She groaned, as her eyes then rested upon the black scissors that rested next to the clock. She shut her eyes, resisting the urge. She gave into the temptation as soon as she opened her eyes, though. Grabbing the scissors from her nightstand, she began to roll up her black sleeve.

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"So...Spring Fling, you going?"

Manny bit her lip, as she grabbed a text book out of her locker Tuesday morning. How did she answer this question?

"It's not that hard...you're either going or you're not."

"Well," she began slowly. "JT sort of invited me..."

"Oh," Craig said dejectedly. "Then I guess I should ask someone else, huh?"

"No," Manny said quickly. "I...I want to go with you...but JT..."

"So, just ditch JT."

Manny was silent.

"Unless...you like him or something."

She looked up at him. "JT's one of the only people that's stuck by my side since...well, you know. I owe this to him."

Craig laughed hollowly. "You think you owe him because he likes you and you feel bad because you can't return the feelings?"

"No, it's not like that."

"Then what is it like?"

Manny took in a deep breath.

"What, Manny? You don't owe JT anything...except the truth," Craig told her.

She stared inside her locker for a few seconds before daring to answer. Her lip quavered just slightly. "You're right...you're right."

She slammed her locker shut and started down the hallway.

"Where are you going?" Craig called behind her.

"I'll talk to you later," she mumbled, as the bell rang.

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A/N: Eeeeek, hope you all liked it...whew. I'm glad I finally got this done. - It's almost over...ah! The last few chapters are always the hardest for me to write, so yeah. I really had to think about the ending. Okay, I'm done babbling...