June 2, 1998
Dear Ron,
There's so many things I wish that I could say, so many things I wanted to tell you but didn't have the chance to. I had no choice in leaving, know that. No chance to say good-bye. And now I'm here... where ever here may be.
First, I want to thank you for everything you have ever done for me. You never treated me special because of my name and for that alone I am grateful. For your friendship and loyalty, putting yourself in danger when you didn't need to, I thank you again. It means more to me than you know.
I wish you could be here with me, no matter how dangerous it is and how selfish that makes me seem. I would tell all these things to you, despite how awkward it would get and how red you would turn.
You always make me smile. No matter what the situation, you've always been able to lighten the mood, making everything pouring in on me seem less ugly. You'd do that now, wouldn't you? By making some joke, by making me laugh. I miss laughing, Ron. I haven't laughed since I left Hogwarts... since I left you. Remus is here training me. He has tried to cheer me up, but it just isn't the same.
He's the one who told me to write this, you know, even if the chances of you reading it anytime soon are slim. I makes me wonder if I can admit everything. You're not going to read this, why not tell you the true reason I miss you? Why not go into sappy details like some lovesick third year?
I couldn't do it. Not on paper, nor in person. Even if this is only for my own good, to distract myself from the loud noises coming from the mountains, I cannot put it on paper. But I can tell you something else, Ron... I'm scared. It took me five minutes to write it down, but it's the truth. I'm scared shitless about what will soon happen. I'm scared, but determined. Voldemort will pay. I will survive. And, someday, I will show you this letter.
Until that time,
Harry