July 21, 1998
Dear Severus,
I know that you must be thinking I am terribly foolish, writing to you as Hogwarts falls to pieces around me, but it was you I thought of when this fight began. I am deep inside Hogwarts, safe in the unused recovery room, awaiting healing wounded fighters. I don't remember how I was assigned this job, but I feel guilty for it now. It seems everyone but me and the other girls assisting me are up there fighting. You're up there, still fighting I hope. Even Ginny is fighting. The sounds of the battle seem echoed down here, as if magnified by the soil that surrounds us. I fear for you, which may be me showing my foolish self again.
We're near your classroom and your office. I don't think much is broken... Will you forgive me for what happened there? I know what you are thinking, and no, I don't regret it. What about you? You told me that you did but I don't believe you. I'm eighteen, Severus, and indeed a woman. I know what I want, I can make decisions without backing out of them later.
I wouldn't leave you, despite what you might think. Scowl if you like, doubt me even, but I tell the truth. I would dedicate the rest of my life to you if given the chance. Oh, that sounds horribly rash, now doesn't it? Surely it can't be the age difference that is bothering you or the fact that I am a Gryffindor. Those things don't matter... Maybe I was just too inexperienced for you.
Dammit Severus, why did you become so cold? I know that you wanted me, that you still do. You would have stopped it had you not wanted it. You would have stopped your eyes from wandering to me in those quick meetings Dumbledore has held since school let out... I didn't mean to go that far, I only mean to kiss you! Why didn't you push me away, if you hate me so? Why won't you let me figure you out? You let me be your friend for those afternoons in your class, why not something more?
I've got to go – the doors have fallen.
Love,
Hermione