The dust cleared and the screaming started. Screams of pain, screams of sorrow.
"Tally! Abigail!" Raelle's voice cut through the air. Before the explosion, Tally had been standing right at her side but now she was nowhere.
Tally coughed and attempted to get her bearings, but she quickly found she couldn't stand. She couldn't move her legs at all. "Raelle!" She tapped into her magic sight that allowed her to see through the smoke. So much destruction, so much death. She found her blonde sister crushed under a large piece of cement. The best Tally could do was crawl over to her.
"Rae!" Tally brushed the dirt off her face. "You're going to be okay,"
"Abi-gail…" Raelle sputtered.
She searched harder, eventually finding Abigail, motionless. Raelle read her face first before Tally could even think about finding the words. "No, Tally, no!"
She didn't remember anything else but Raelle's wail of grief until she woke up in her bed almost a week later. It was quiet, but her head was screaming. "Sarah?" Tally called even before she pried her eyes open. She had a massive headache, pounding with every attempted movement.
"Tally's awake!" Someone unfamiliar practically yelled joyously.
"Quiet down! We can all hear you!" Someone else answered.
"Ugh," She groaned and pushed herself up in the bed, albeit painfully, and finally opened her eyes. The light pierced her eyes like a dagger being driven into her skull, and just as quickly she shut them and instinctively covered her face with her hands. Even that felt like fire shooting through her limbs. She was quite sore.
"Get the lights! Quickly!" A different woman commanded and almost immediately Tally heard the small click of the light switch. When she finally cracked her eyes open again, what she saw both warmed her heart and filled her with disappointment. Even in the darkness, she could see the biddies were all gathered around her bed, already prepared with more blankets, pillows, water, and hot soup, but Sarah…was not there.
"Wow," Tally didn't know what to say, her head was swimming. She didn't have the emotional fortitude to keep tears back from her eyes.
They all smiled and looked warmly down upon her. "Welcome back Tally, Sarah will be overjoyed to know you are awake," Seven voices said in unison, each placing their gathered items near her.
"Thank you all, you didn't have to do all this," Tally smiled and wiped her eyes. "What happened? Where is Sarah? Did she get back from the Hague? How did I get here?"
They all looked amongst each other, then back at her. "Yes, she has returned but she has had a few meetings," The eldest biddy stated.
Tally just looked at them, of course, Sarah would be busy. "Well, how is she? When will she be back?!"
"Leave us," The three eldest biddies stated. The others nodded and left.
Clearly, she wasn't good and Tally was filled with unbearable dread that gnawed at her already aching insides. "She is contending with a lot of different issues at the moment. The attack has left things in disarray and she is doing her best to control it all, it wasn't just Salem that was attacked. There were coordinated attacks at bases across the country," The biddy on her left explained carefully.
Tally nodded, she still didn't know exactly what happened or if her friends were okay, or anything. "When will she be back?"
The biddy on her right took this one. "Tally, we don't know, please do not blame her,"
Tally narrowed her eyes. "Blame her for what?"
"She charged us with watching over you here, but we have not seen her since she carried you here from the infirmary," They admitted.
She felt herself tremble before she could even voice the question. "And…and when was that?"
"Several days ago now,"
If she wasn't hurt before that Sarah hadn't been here, she was certainly hurt now. "She hasn't been to visit me…at all?" Her voice wavered and broke.
They silently shook their heads. "She has been keeping an eye on you at all times through us,"
"She blames herself for what happened to you, to everyone," The biddy sitting at the foot of her bed added solemnly.
"Her being here wouldn't have stopped the other attacks," Tally scoffed, typical Sarah taking the blame for everything. "Help me up. If she won't come to me, I'll go to her,"
They looked amongst each other. "That may not be wise. I know she will be eager to see you but you are still in no condition to walk that far. You need to heal,"
Tally closed her eyes and took a breath to keep herself from completely lashing out at the elderly women before her, after all they were only the messengers and they had only ever taken care of her. "You can help me get to her or I will crawl all the way across the base, but one way or the other I am going," She pushed her blankets off her and stifled a groan as she placed a bare foot on the cold floor.
Before she had to test her ability to stand on her own, they did as she asked and helped her off the bed and into her uniform.
Despite the fixing, she still had bruises all over herself. She was able to walk, slowly, and with a limp as the pain in her leg was too great to put weight on, but the biddies assisted her all the way across the base.
They passed the field where the ceremony had been interrupted by fiery explosions. Crews were still cleaning up the debris and removing bodies. The sight made her falter in her step, a sick feeling making itself known in her stomach. She cringed, but the questions remained. She still didn't know what happened to her sisters.
When they arrived at the conference room where Sarah was having a meeting, they helped Tally to sit down outside.
"You cannot possibly want me to push this mandate at this time of tragedy!" Tally could make out Sarah's voice clearly through the wall. She was very obviously pissed, but also tired. The strain and fatigue also made themselves clear in her tone. Tally knew her well enough to know.
"General, we lost over one hundred young soldiers. Witches won't have a future on this planet if we don't do something!" Someone spoke up. It sounded like the new Imperatrix.
Tally wasn't really interested in this discussion, she just wanted to see Sarah and to get the truth about what happened. Letting her head fall back against the wall, it made a slight thud. It made no impact on her headache though, which hadn't faded in the slightest. Trying to breathe through the pounding in her head, and the throbbing of her limbs, she squeezed one of the biddie's hands.
"We can go back, Tally," The woman suggested, noting how much pain Tally seemed to be in.
She shook her head but didn't open her eyes. "Mm-mmm. No. I want to see her,"
"No. These soldiers have just lost their sisters and loved ones, I am not going to march out there and tell them they all have to have children to make up for it!" Sarah again.
That made Tally open her eyes, and she looked across the biddies' faces. "This is what they are worrying about, they don't have more important things?"
"Among other things. Funerals, memorials, retaliations, counterstrikes, fortification, and yes this part about how to move forward and bring new witches into the world," The youngest biddy answered.
"Goddess, do we not get a moment to mourn first?!" Tally grumbled but continued listening to the meeting and focus on her breathing.
"Yes, this is exactly what we need to do! To promote the future of our people in the wake of this disaster! They can mourn, but they also need to move forward," Someone else added, that Tally couldn't quite place. Her head was still a little foggy.
"Fine. So what, all witches between 22 and 30 will be mandated to have at least one child?" Sarah said incredulously, obviously thinking what she proposed was a ridiculous idea as the words left her mouth.
"Not a bad start, but how about witches between 20 and 35, will be required to have two at a minimum and we can propose bonuses for more?"
Tally's eyes shot wide, and the biddies looked just as concerned. Tally wasn't sure if that was their own feelings or if they were mirroring Sarah's.
"Absolutely not!" Sarah roared, her vocalized rage practically shaking the walls.
"Calm down General. You and Tally will make great parents," Tally knew the imperatrix was asking to be windstruck. "How is Tally doing by the way, is she alright?"
Tally recognized the next sound as Sarah's hand connecting with the table. "She is barely alive, no thanks to anyone in this room. She, like everyone else, has just lost members of her family. I will not inform her of her loss and in the same breath command her to bear children! I will not do it!"
"...what…" Tally gasped, her breath felt like it had been taken right from her lungs.
There was a lot to unpack in that statement, and Tally just needed to know. She couldn't stop herself and neither could the biddies.
"You will do it, Sarah. Tally is no different from anyone else, we all share this responsibility, even if she is your wife,-"
Tally threw the door open. "Who?!"
The whole room gasped and looked shocked at the outburst. Sarah jumped up immediately. "Tally, sweetheart! You're awake," She enveloped her in a tight hug, not caring about the other generals in the room with her.
"So it's decided then?" Some of them muttered to each other.
"I think so,"
Sarah rolled her eyes. "Dismissed, all of you, get out, this isn't over,"
"Your children will be so cute," The imperatrix said over her shoulder on her way out.
Sarah slammed the door behind them so it was just her and Tally in the conference room now.
Tally weakly pushed Sarah off her and sat down tiredly. Long ago it was understood that she was second to Sarah's job, but it didn't lessen the sting that Sarah hadn't been with her when she woke, but that she hadn't been there at all, even at night given how many days had passed. Either Sarah hadn't slept at all or…well that was probably it, but she could have spared a few minutes to see her.
"They were supposed to inform me when you woke, darling, I am sorry I wasn't there," At least she sounded sincere.
"Are you? They told me you weren't there at all!" Tally spat.
Tally could see Sarah clench her jaw at the accusation. "I know. I am sorry I wasn't there personally, I was watching over you through them, every moment. There wasn't a second I wasn't thinking about you, but I needed to make sure everything got taken care of, that there would be no more attacks that could hurt you again,"
Tally was having a hard time staying mad at her now that she could hear the pain in her voice. "It's my fault you were hurt in the first place, I'm so sorry Tally,"
"Don't say that," Sarah looked at her with soft eyes and carefully brushed some of her red hair out of her face. "Sarah, just tell me who. Please,"
Sarah shifted uncomfortably. Tally knew Sarah had given countless of these condolence messages to families before, and she couldn't imagine the toll it took on her. Sarah took Tally's hand. "I'm sorry Tally, Bellwether, she didn't make it. The fixers tried everything, but she was hurt too badly,"
"No, Sarah no, not Abigail," Tally sobbed. "What about Raelle? Does she know?!" Sarah pulled Tally carefully into her, holding her tightly.
"Collar is still recovering in the infirmary. She has not woken to be told yet," Tally just shook her head.
"No, Sarah no, she can't be dead," Tally cried into her shoulder while Sarah rubbed her back gently. "Why would I want to bring children into this cruel world?!"
"It isn't about want, I'm afraid,"
Tally woke up with a start, breathing heavily, brought back to that goddess-forsaken year. She would give anything to have Sarah hold her, but as she suspected when she opened her eyes, Sarah was nowhere to be seen. The space she had vacated, had long gone cold. Tally sighed, wishing that just once Sarah could stay and be there when she woke, especially today of all days, but no. She glanced around to see a gorgeous rose on her bedside table, under which a note was delicately placed.
Tally knew it was hard for the older witch, and she did her best to not hold it against her. As the years passed, it only became increasingly apparent that Sarah didn't know how to cope.
She stretched out her aching joints before pulling the note from its place.
"Happy Birthday, my love. Breakfast is in the oven. I went for a walk, but I will be back soon. Love, Sarah"
Tally wasted no time, there were only a few places Sarah could be, and no matter what her note said, she knew Sarah wouldn't be back quickly unless she went to find her.
After getting her uniform on as quickly as her body would allow, she checked the oven timer to see forty-five minutes still on the clock. Clearly, Sarah hadn't left that long ago.
She rushed herself out the door as fast as she could manage. Though she had been fixed all those years ago, every now and again she would feel the ghost of pain shoot through her legs. She did her best to ignore it as she hurried down the paths across the base.
Tally shivered as the brisk early morning gusts of wind hit her, she should have brought an extra jacket. Especially knowing Sarah was in a mood, she should have remembered. She just had to make the walk quick before it started actually raining.
She slowed down ever so slightly as she always did when she passed the memorial for the witches they lost in the attack 18 years ago. Once passed, she picked up her pace again, just in time too, as she started to feel the patter of raindrops on her head.
Once inside, she was immediately warmer. It was a weekend, so the place was significantly quieter than usual which she was grateful for.
"General!" "General Alder!" "Tally" "Tally!" "General!" "General," A group of recognizable young voices called out from behind her.
Tally spun around to see a unit of three first-year cadets trailing behind the older and easily recognizable Bellwether twins and Raelle's eldest daughter. Alliyah and Elizabeth Bellwether were all done up and stoic as their mother, the spitting images of Abigail, though they both always had Adil's kind eyes.
Beside them was Amara Collar with her dark curls delicately framing the fair skin of her face. Slightly behind them was a taller girl, well-built with slightly darker skin and dark smooth hair tied back in a tight ponytail. Tally recognized her as Gregorio's daughter, Kiara. In the middle was Raelle's second daughter Willow. Tally always thought she looked more like Raelle, though she still had Scylla's brown hair and brown eyes, but it also could have been that she picked up more of Raelle's mannerisms. And finally on the end stood her own beautiful daughter, Bridget Alder. Her dark hair was braided just on the sides to keep it out of her blueish eyes, but the rest was just down. A hairstyle Tally had favored during her combat years.
"Why are you all skulking about so early?" She eyed them all curiously. "And you should all know better than to call me General Alder, there can only be one, and that is not me," She smiled, looking across all of their faces, she remembered when they were all barely walking, and now here they all were. Abigail's girls were on track to be sergeants this year having just finished war college, and Amara was starting war college, and Bridget and her unit had started basic training only a short few weeks ago. It was weird not having her living with them anymore, but the fact she could run into her like this any day was nice. "You may call me General, only, is that understood?"
"It wasn't me," "It wasn't me," The twins stated simultaneously, still standing at attention.
Tally just laughed. "No of course not, but I didn't ask who it was. Speaking of the General Alder though, have any of you seen her?"
They all looked amongst each other and then back at her.
"I think I saw her in-" Allyiah started but Elizabeth elbowed her.
Tally narrowed her eyes. "Where? I order you to tell me,"
"She said not to say, and she uh outranks you, ma'am, I'm sorry," Elizabeth stated firmly.
"Is that so?" Tally stepped toe to toe with the eldest twin. "So much like your mother you both are," She placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I don't look forward to telling your father that you disobeyed my direct orders, you should know better than that, he will not be pleased,"
"Mom, come on, I know where the General is, you don't have to be like this, you're embarrassing me," Her daughter grumbled with crossed arms.
Tally rolled her eyes. "Fine then, the rest of you are dismissed, I will be having that word with your father when I see him next. Now I need to have a word with Bridget for a moment,"
"Yes ma'am," They all said in unison with a stop of their feet, before walking off.
When they were around the corner, Bridget hugged her tightly. "Happy birthday mom!"
"Oh, so this isn't too embarrassing for you?" Tally asked, holding her close and then letting her go. Oh, she had missed her.
Bridget looked down. "I'm sorry. I just am still getting used to this,"
"Look at me, sweetheart, I know. I remember my first year, it was a lot, but you'll get used to it, I am certain of it," Tally said softly. "But especially after everything if you ever need anything, we are here for you,"
"I know, I just…" Bridget trailed off.
Tally cocked her head to the side. "What?"
"I don't want to disappoint her, uh or you," She stammered.
Tally gave her a serious look. "Bridget, you could never. We are both incredibly proud of you. Even if she doesn't show it, I know she is. So are you going to tell me what all of you are doing up and about this early on a Sunday morning?"
The younger witch shifted between her feet. "We are getting some extra training in. Ally and Beth agreed to spar with us,"
Tally sighed. "If your mother found out, you would all be in serious trouble,"
Bridget pouted. "Why?! What's wrong with it? Isn't the whole point for us to get better and stronger?"
"Of course it is, but the twins are quite a bit older than you. Basics is about just that, the basics. Going too fast when you're not ready can be dangerous, as you know, I shouldn't have to remind you of that. The rules she made are there to protect you,"
Bridget nodded reluctantly. "I know I know,"
Tally sighed but relented. "Run along. Have fun, but be careful please, and don't forget we are having lunch with Anacostia and her daughter this afternoon,"
"Of course, thanks mom," Bridget smiled.
"Did she talk to you when you saw her?" Tally asked tentatively before she let Bridget walk away.
The girl shook her head. "I mean I saw her from a distance, briefly. I didn't see exactly where she went, but my guess is memorial hall. How has she been doing?"
Tally sighed. "Well I don't have to remind you it's my birthday, and you turned 18 in the same year, so I think it's fair to say that she isn't handling it very well at all, not that she would tell me that herself, but I know her,"
"Right, so expect her to be worse tonight than any other year. Got it," Bridget spoke softly.
Tally hated that it was affecting her girl so much as well, but none of it was easy. She allowed the following silence to hang in the air for a moment before she replied. "Hey, if you see her, and there aren't too many people around, you should give her a hug, she misses you, young lady, now go, catch up with your unit," Tally pulled her in for one more hug. "I love you, and really just call me General or mom, you don't want to get people confused,"
"Right, love you too, mom, see you later," Bridget ran off after her friends and Tally continued on her mission to find her elusive wife before their breakfast casserole burned in the oven. Thankfully, the memorial hall was only a few hallways away, and just as predicted, it was empty except for one woman.
"General Alder, reporting General," Tally stated, standing at attention next to her wife. She knew Sarah hated it when she did that, but she got a smile out of her every time so it was worth it.
Sarah sighed audibly. "At ease Tally, you do not have to do that you know," She said without turning her head. Tally could hear the smile in her voice though. She put her arms around Sarah's waist, hugging her from behind, and rested her chin on her shoulder so she could see the display Sarah was standing before. "You also know there can only be one, and it's me," Sarah turned and kissed her on the cheek, making Tally smile.
She let her go and came to stand next to her, keeping an arm around her waist. "Yes darling, I know, I just got done reminding some of our favorite cadets that very same thing,"
"Oh? Which ones?" Sarah cocked an eyebrow at her.
Tally smiled. "Specifically? Our daughter,"
Sarah's eyes widened. "Ha. Our Bridget called you 'General Alder'? That is hilarious, she does remember who I am, yes?"
Tally chuckled. "Of course she does, even if you have been a bit distant," She rubbed Sarah's back gently. "I think she was just nervous, which is understandable, she feels a lot of pressure to live up to your standards, given everything I think it makes sense," Tally paced around the room, glancing at all of the familiar displays.
Sarah was silent, watching Tally as she walked around until she stopped in front of one display in particular.
"I remember my birthday that year so clearly. It was the last one before everything changed. Do you remember? That was a rough two weeks, 20 years ago," It was one of the two displays Sarah had commissioned for her thirty-second birthday. In the glass case was a painting of Sarah and Tally kneeling on the dusty ground, Tally's hand on Sarah's shoulder. Next to it was a portrait of Tally from when she was a Cadet. Underneath was a description of the Tarim mission that was much more dramatic than Tally remembered it being.
The last line read: "Cadet Tally Craven was the hero of the day. There is no telling how the world would be different to this day had it not been for her valiant and selfless sacrifice,"
Tally scoffed at that with a tear in her eye.
Tally looked back to the morning of her birthday two decades ago:
"This is so dramatic Sarah, tell me you didn't write this," She stood beaming at her, tears in her eyes, she didn't know what she had expected, but this wasn't it. Not that she would trade it for anything, no, it was perfect.
"I did not, but I do believe in every written word of it," Sarah smiled proudly. "The world truly would be a vastly different place had you not stepped in on that fateful day," She paused to cup Tally's cheek, locking their gazes together. "That one singular mission all those years ago, gave me so much that I will forever be grateful for," Sarah's voice broke over the words, and Tally could feel all of the raw emotions the older witch was trying to convey. "That mission changed everything for me, in the best ways imaginable,"
"It wasn't all good though," Tally shrugged.
"I would not change anything at all," Sarah reassured her. "I would not change anything and risk losing you and all that we have together, I would not. I almost lost you more than enough times without having to add meddling in the past, to that list of causes,"
"I know," Tally nodded. "And you know I love you, yes? Even if something would have happened. You always had my heart, Sarah, and you always will," Sarah closed her eyes and tightened her grip on the redhead. Tally pulled her closer, letting the general's head fall onto her shoulder while she stroked the back of her head soothingly. "I'm here, I've got you,"
"Not for long," Sarah shuddered, her voice a breathy wavering whisper. Tally squeezed her tighter, but she knew for the kind of sorrow she was feeling, there was nothing she could do to console her. The older witch was mourning her, though she was still alive and well.
"Thank you for all of this, it was incredibly thoughtful of you," Tally tried to change the subject as she continued drawing circles on Sarah's back.
"You deserve it, Tally," Sarah pulled herself out of Tally's grip and cleared her throat. "There is one more thing I wanted to show you,"
She strode across the room and carefully lifted another blanket away revealing a wall of portraits. "They take such good care of me, I only regret that I have not taken the time to honor them all better," her tone was solemn and Tally knew how grateful she was.
"You have, Sarah, I know how you are with them, how you were with me, I know they feel honored just to be near you, to be part of something so important," Tally tried to explain while she took in the display before her.
Sarah looked uncomfortable but she nodded. "Yes well, I know it is your birthday, but I thought you'd also appreciate this,"
Tally was beyond words, she didn't know if it were possible for her to love this woman any more than she did right now. "I do, and I know they all would too," Tally squeezed her hand supportively. "It is perfect," Each portrait was of the biddy as they entered basic training as a cadet, with the dates of their biddyship, beginning to end, on a plaque underneath. There was a blank space after Tally's portrait that made her tighten her grip on Sarah just thinking about that time in their lives. She knew why Sarah probably insisted it be included, but still it bothered her. Tally wiped the tears out of her eyes before turning and hugging Sarah close. "I love it, and I love you,"
Sarah's voice snapped her back to the present. Her eyes swept the room. Before they landed on Sarah, they hit the other display, though it was different now, many more photographs had been added and a dull sense of sadness crept over her before she blinked it away and let her gaze fall on Sarah's ever-young and beautiful face.
"Do I remember your birthday that year or do I remember two weeks later when I wasn't here and I almost lost you?" Sarah asked seriously, tearing her thoughts away.
"I know you haven't forgotten either event, you have a good memory," Tally was quiet. "You still haven't lost me, Sarah," Tally walked to stand beside her. "You know I'd be the first to admit that everything that happened was horrible, and I miss Abigail every day, but you know if that hadn't happened, we wouldn't have that mini-you running around here. Every day I get with you and her is a gift,"
Sarah looked away then, the guilt and pain of everything was too much for her and she couldn't look at her wife. "If I had been here to stop it, to protect you, there would have been less pain, less death. You would not have had to grieve your sister, and more than that, you and I wouldn't have had to eventually grieve our first daughter,"
Tally gasped. That wasn't a topic they discussed frequently, so it always stung like salt on a fresh wound when it was brought up. Fighting to keep her voice from breaking, she wiped her eyes before the tears could even slip down her cheeks. "That all may be, but it was not your fault and you need to forgive yourself. No one blames you but you. It was twenty years ago, there was nothing you could have done. You need to choose to cherish the people who are still here, the time that you have with them, and hope that you may be reunited with those we have lost, after this life. The camarilla might have taken her from us, but we will be with her again someday, I know it,"
"You mean you will," Sarah sounded cold and dejected.
Exasperatedly, Tally slid her palm over her face. Words could not describe how tired she had grown of this conversation over the years. "No Sarah, you will join us someday too, whether that's with me when my time comes, or another hundred years from now, you will too,"
Sarah looked at her again and she was once again hit with those bright blue eyes. "My work isn't done,"
Shaking her head, Tally stepped up to Sarah. As always, the years had not touched a single feature on her perfect face. Tally cupped her cheek with a gentle, slightly wrinkled hand. "Work is ongoing and your determination to find more for yourself is unyielding, you will never be done unless you choose to be. But you could choose to be,"
"Just like you could choose to stay," Sarah mumbled. Tally's hearing hadn't gone yet, and she gave Sarah a stem look.
Tally sighed but looked at her softly. "I don't want to have this conversation with you again, Sarah, please?" Sarah gave the slightest of nods. "Now, come on, we are meeting Anacostia and your granddaughter for lunch, remember?"
Sarah cocked her head to the side. "Tally, you haven't even had breakfast, are you feeling alright?"
"I am fine, I just know that the casserole is still in the oven, and if we burn the place down we will be dealing with that for the rest of the day," She smiled and Sarah just rolled her eyes with a smile before taking her hand.
"Then let's go,"
"Happy Birthday Tally!" Anacostia smiled and hugged her.
Tally beamed brightly back at her. "Thank you," She hugged her tightly before sitting down across from the older witch. Sarah had gone off with Tessa and Bridget to place their orders. They had gone out to Tally's favorite local restaurant downtown.
Tally's eyes barely left Sarah and Bridget. She was happy that they seemed to be laughing about something. Sometimes it was tense between them, she had always wanted them to have a good relationship but lately, it has been strained.
"How have you been? Still happy running missions out of the cape?" Tally asked casually, testing her eyes away from her favorite people.
"Yes ma'am, but you knew that. I couldn't get bored with Ramshorn as my second in command," Anacostia nodded. "I want to talk about you though, while my mom has given us a moment's peace, how have you been, how has she been? Any more pressure to take your own…you know,"
Tally was sipping on some water and nearly choked, making her cough. "Oh uh, every so often. She is dealing with everything the best she can. I think after losing Dalia, and Bridget just starting basic training this year, and now today…we both know she isn't one for properly processing her feelings. But when you live to be nearly 400, who can really say what the best way is to do that? Only she can do what works for her,"
"But she also has to think about you,"
She nodded. "And she does. Part of me just feels like she expects me to change my mind any day now, but I made my decision years ago and I made peace with that. After everything with Dalia, that only solidified it. Anacostia, I love Sarah to death, but I...I want to see my girl again," She wiped a silent tear off her cheek.
"I pray to the goddess that when I go, I'll be with Sterling again,"
"You will, I believe it," Tally reached across the table and took her hand, squeezing it gently. "Between you and I, I have already seen it, my end. I know it is not my place to stay,"
"You have?"
Tally took a deep breath and chanced a glance back at Sarah. "I don't know when but I have seen it. It would only hurt her to know, so I bear it alone, but so is my duty as a knower,"
"I understand," Anacostia sighed, leaning neck in her chair. "Talk about heavy conversations, I feel like I need a drink, though it's far too early, I suppose we could have just talked about the weather,"
Tally laughed at that, but really she was grateful for Anacostia. That woman knew Sarah better than anyone, now barring herself, but it meant she had someone to talk to who understood the person under all of the medals and honors and military formalities. "You brought it up, but you want to talk about how your mother has been making it rain for almost a week straight, 'cause we can definitely talk about that," She smiled up at Sarah who rejoined them with Bridget and Tessa right at that moment.
"What's this about me?" Sarah quirked an eyebrow at her.
Anacostia and Tally looked at each other and then back at Sarah. "Nothing, just talking about how nice the weather has been lately, darling,"
"Goddess," Sarah scoffed and folded her arms. "You know it isn't just me, weather without magic still exists,"
They all laughed and Tally gave her a slight kiss on the cheek. "Of course we know,"
Tally breathed in the fresh air, thankful for the sun on her face, and held Sarah's hand tightly in her own. "It was nice to see them," They had just walked Bridget back to her building and were now steadily on their way back to their place.
"Mhmm," Sarah barely responded with a hum.
"I always wish we could see them for longer, Tessa has gotten so old, she is a fine young soldier. The poor girl looked so embarrassed when Anacostia mentioned that boy, but who knows, you could expect a great-grandchild someday soon," Tally said thoughtfully, reminiscing over the rest of lunch.
There was a pause, broken by another absent-minded hum of agreement only when Tally looked up at her. "Mhmm,"
"Want to tell me what's wrong?" Tally squeezed her hand.
"Mm mm,"
"Okay, should I just look ahead to our next argument or…" Tally threatened and she knew that would make Sarah answer her.
Sarah stopped then and the energy about them shifted. Her eyes were not cast in Tally's direction, but rather they were directed away, over the trees, or down at the ground, or simply anywhere else but her face. "There is no need, Tally. The greatest obstacle to my soul is time and never having enough of it with the ones I care about. It was truly lovely to see them, as it always is, but as much joy I get from seeing their smiles and hearing their stories, I feel twice as much sorrow to see the way time has eroded away at them. Not just them, or you, it's everyone…"
"That's why I asked you to release your biddies, one at a time, grow old with me and you won't have to go through that ever again, Sarah," Tally almost pleaded, her voice breaking over the argument she had had far too many times.
The way Sarah looked away from her told her that her mind hadn't been changed and would not be. "The words have been exhausted by our overuse. Let it rest. There is nothing more to say on the matter, I wish to not speak of it ever again,"
"Okay," Tally let go of Sarah's hand, and they walked on in silence. And so that was how it would be, they would just not acknowledge it anymore. Neither of them had an answer the other could accept so they had to bury it. At that moment, in the next, for the rest of the day, the rest of the month, the rest of that year, ever, there would not be another discussion on the matter. Tally could live and die with that, she knew that, but Sarah was struggling to live with it and she did not have a choice.
Years passed and they stayed true to that night, not speaking of it again.
"Sister," Sarah sighed a breath of relief that threatened to blow out the candle that flickered before her. "It is so good to hear your voice,"
"Hello Sarah, it is a surprise to see you again, but a pleasant one, unfortunately, the last," The ethereal girl shimmered in the moonlight that drifted through the window of her dark office.
Sarah tilted her head to the side. "What do you mean?"
The girl didn't respond for a moment. "Why are you not with your wife visiting either of your daughters? I cannot fathom that you made her choose between them, though I suppose that choice will weigh upon you as well soon enough,"
"I needed to talk to you sister, I don't know-" Sarah broke down and sobbed, totally inconsolable, knowing she betrayed Tally by forcing her to choose which daughter to see this year and forcing her to do it alone, but she needed help, she needed answers. Of course, her heart ached to see her deceased children as well, but she could not call on them to ask about death. She had already lost so much, now both of her own children included, it only made the thought of losing Tally more unbearable.
"Breathe sister, what you will experience is nothing new to you," She spoke evenly.
Blinking up at her, she narrowed her eyes. "Is this not different?!"
"You are no stranger to death. You have lost countless sisters, and countless daughters, including three of your own, and you have survived. You will lose your wife too, sooner than you'd ever wish, but you will still survive, and you will call on her as you call on me now,"
Sarah tried to steady herself but it wasn't working she couldn't breathe. Her lungs burned and she made every attempt to suck air in, her body shook violently and it was all too much. Out of nowhere, she was slapped across the face, the sharp sting pulled her back from the edge of hysteria. "Sister! This will do you no good!"
She gasped for breath and somewhat regained some semblance of a regular breathing pattern. "Do you know when…when will I lose her?"
"As I said, this will be the very last time you call on me, and I understand, I love you, my sister," The ghost smiled at her softly.
Sarah shook her head not wanting to hear the implications of what she was saying. "No. No. How could you know that?!"
"It is already written,"