A knock on his door and Holliday answered. It was early for visitors.
Wyatt entered the room and by the looks of him, disheveled clothing, hair out of place and face drawn, he had gotten little or no rest the night past. Doc showed the man to a chair and drew one up opposite him at the small table.
"What's the matter, Wyatt? What's happened?" Holliday poured himself a shot of whiskey from the bottle that sat between them. He glanced over at Earp, a question on his face. Wyatt nodded and Doc poured a shot out for him as well. Whatever was bothering Earp was serious indeed.
"Mattie lost the baby last night." His voice was sadness itself and Doc was puzzled.
"The baby? Wyatt this is the first I've heard there was a child expected." Holliday waited for his friend to elaborate.
"Mattie was expecting, but she didn't want anyone to know about it just yet. Her ma had always said it wasn't right to tell about a baby till the mother was three months along at least. Said it was bad luck or some such nonsense. Seems that had little to do with things this time."
Wyatt reached out and took the glass into his hand, staring into the amber liquid before tossing it back. A grimace followed the whiskey but that did not stop him from pouring another shot.
"Wyatt, I'm very sorry." Doc drank off his own shot and refilled the glass. Like his friend, he allowed that one to sit untouched. "You wanted it then," he observed.
"It? I wanted the baby...yes, very much. She had a bad time of it. Doctor Goodfellow helped as much as he could, but there really wasn't much he could do. All that pain...all that and nothing to hold afterwards."
Wyatt looked into the face of the man sitting across from him and Holliday was startled by the anguish he read there. Even Earp's eyes were red-rimmed from crying.
Doc reached out a hand, but drew it back. He did not know how to help, as much as he wanted to try. Silence stretched out. Holliday drank the whiskey he had poured. Wyatt's sat untasted.
Finally Doc spoke and his voice was muted and full of feeling. "Kate was pregnant once...while we were in Prescott. Silly me, I thought it was mine, someone to live on after I'd passed...carry on the name and so forth. How I wanted that child, Wyatt." There was a pause and a cough covered by a handkerchief. "I would've married her."
It was Earp's turn to be surprised.
As Holliday spoke, his voice quavered; his eyes grew soft and his expression sad. "Kate didn't want it. Told me it wasn't my child. And you know, even that didn't really matter to me. We had argument after argument about it until one day she just up and left on the morning stage.
"Weeks passed without word and finally she returned. Just like Kate, all sugar and butter wouldn't melt on her tongue and sorry. We made up in bed. I was being so gentle, so careful and you know what she says, Wyatt?" Earp shook his head no.
"She says, "Doc honey, why you bein' so easy on me. You know I like it sassy." And I say I don't want to hurt the child. "Child? What child? Where the hell ya think I went, Doc? I got rid of it! I told ya I didn't want it and besides, it wasn't yours anyhow."
There was another pause, longer than the first. "At least Mattie wanted your baby, didn't she?"
Earp nodded.
Again Holliday refilled his glass and again he drank it down. It was beginning to affect him on an empty stomach. He could feel it, but didn't care. When he spoke again, his voice was slurred.
"At least you had that, Wyatt. And maybe Mattie would've been a decent mother. Kate has all the mothering capabilities of a cuckoo. Lay her egg in some other bird's nest and forget all about it. But even that damned bird cares enough to actually lay the egg. Kate couldn't even do that much." Holliday shook his head in disgust.
Wyatt had come to Doc for what, to be comforted? Instead he discovered Holliday's experience had been even worse than his own. Now he felt he should be the one offering some kind words, but he couldn't.
Pushing aside the whiskey, he stared out the window of Doc's room. People came and went. Life went on, but why in hell did it have to be so damned hard? Finally he came out and asked Doc that question, as if the dentist had an answer. Naturally he did.
"All life is suffering, Wyatt. Haven't you learned that lesson yet?" Holliday offered a wry smile. "But if it takes every moment of what's left of my life, I do hope you'll prove me wrong."