Summary: James loves Lily. Lily hates James. James shows his love for Lily by playing pranks on her. Lily retaliates with hexes and verbal insults. Add a non-serious Sirius and a wise Remus to play matchmaker and what do you get? My fanfic!

Disclaimer: I am NOT J.K Rowling!!! I, therefore, do not own Harry Potter or anything mentioned in Harry Potter!

Reviews:

XLynex: Thanks so much for your review! You were actually my first! :) I think I will continue this story! lol

Lils-X: Awww thanks for the compliment! I'm so used to writing essays in class, and staying within the strict confines, it feels eerie and relieving at the same time to just let loose! lol To tell you the truth, I think after about two years reading fanfic, you start to pick up on the styles people write. I'm seriously winging this completely but I'm glad you enjoy it!

Vickiicky: Thanks! I know how eager I always am for new chapters to come so I'll try to keep the chapters coming (as fast as my fingers can fly over the keyboard, and as long as school allows!)

Telwyn Dubois: Wow. Simply wow! You have no idea how much it means to me that you reviewed! I hold you in high esteem due to your incredible writing! Thank you!

Pigwidgeon188: Thanks, Kristen! I know, I'm going to try to update as much as I can! One thing I probably won't do is write an author's note as a chapter! I always am disappointed when I get an author's alert only to read someone's excuses for not writing! I don't want excuses, I want the story! Lol As for James, you'll just have to wait! So no, being a friend of the author doesn't has its perks this time! Sorry, Crooty!

Chapter 2: Day One: Part One

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. - Oscar Wilde

Faint, miniscule rays of sunlight streamed into Lily's room, causing shadows to dance to an unheard rhythm, as she groggily opened her emerald eyes. Yes, the sun itself was hardly up, yet Lily Elizabeth Evans was awake. Why, you may ask? Well, it was just one of those mysteries of the world; you can ask as many times as your heart desires without receiving a definite and exact answer every time—like how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? Some attempt to answer the popular and, thus, annoying question via scientifically or pure guessing, but what it all comes down to is this; the world may never know. Well Lily's uncanny sleeping habits were just one of those questions where you may never know the exact answer. At any rate, the young witch stretched her sore muscles lazily while swinging two dead weights she liked to call "legs" off the warm bed. Still in a dream-like state, Lily gazed longingly outside where a kaleidoscope of colors crept through the misty clouds. It might have been her imagination, but the clouds seemed to drift together in a pattern of some sort; yes, Lily vaguely saw an outline of a person's face; the wispy clouds took the form of oval shaped glasses peering down at her, and, for a moment lost in time, Lily felt as if her soul was being unearthed. She felt completely free and rejuvenated, a feeling she had often, yet not this strong. Then, all too soon, the puffy clouds swirled and evolved into a menacing, dark figure; on its right side, a gigantic serpent slithered, and on its left side, a slimy rat sneaked around, almost as if it was desperately trying to hide from its "master's" cloak. Lily immediately shook her head and the mysterious balls of fluff returned to their delicate sunrise. As if awakened from a trance, Lily stepped away from the window and started to prepare for the horrible day, all the while muttering, "Stop daydreaming! You need a clear mind if you're going to be dealing with Tuna for an entire week. Even with Alice coming, it shall prove to be difficult, especially since Tuna was allowed to invite a friend. With my luck, Alice and I will be stuck with Tuna and one of her annoying little minions that clings to her every word and bitches about everything." Sighing as she finished the last touches to her makeup, Lily's face took on a look of determination as she fiercely whispered, "Bring on the week of hell."

Lily slowly walked down the winding staircase, as if preparing for her doom. Silently she wished with all her might that Alice had miraculously came and did not wake her. Unfortunately, as Lily's petite foot came in contact with the final stair, she did not find Alice's plump, yet cute, face beaming to see her. Instead, to Lily's utter astonishment and disgust, she encountered a red face of a fat—no, scratch that—humongous man wearing a tacky purple suit with yellow buttons that were about to burst open. If Lily were not so repulsed by the walrus-like man standing in front of her, she would have burst out laughing at his ridiculous clothing. As it were, Lily's face contorted to a mix of disappointment, disgust, and amusement, which Lily believed was a rather odd mix. "Then again," Lily thought amusedly, "the look on my face for a brief moment is almost identical to Petunia's horse-like face all the time!"

"Ah, speak of the devil," Lily murmured, as Petunia's scrawny body flew into view.

"This," Petunia said snootily, "is my boyfriend, Vernon Dursley. His father owns a prosperous drilling company, and when Vernon is old enough, he shall take over the business, isn't that right, Vernie?"

"It certainly is my darling. Sweetums dearest, you forgot to introduce me to your stunning sister," Vernon squeaked as his squinty eyes stared lustfully at Lily's body.

"I'm Lily, and I'd prefer it if you would look at my face, not my body, like the repulsing pig/walrus you are. You know, usually when I'm introduced to someone, I would extend my hand, but I honestly don't think you are worth it. I also don't wish to scrub my hand vigorously with soap for the next year," Lily spat angrily.

Vernon, about to reply with most likely a not-so-witty remark, was struck down as a soot-covered figure tumbled out of the fireplace. Vernon, being the wimp that he is, screamed in a high-pitched voice, much to Lily's chagrin. However, as Petunia stooped over to brush Vernon off, Lily finally recognized the dirty figure to be her dearest friend, and at the moment, savior.

"ALICE!" Lily screamed.

"LILY!" the soot-covered Alice mockingly screamed back though a bright smile was painted on her face.

The two kindred spirits embraced in a friendly hug, as Lily whispered, "You came! You came! Thank you Thank you Thank you!"

After a few sentimental seconds, the two magical friends split apart and turned to face Petunia and Vernon. "Alice, this is Vernon, Tuna-breath's ickle boyfriend," Lily stated to Alice, and then murmured, "he's a muggle, too." And then, as if Lily were just learning this fact as well, her face contorted into one of panic, as she reached for her wand. However, this movement did not go pass Petunia's beady eyes as she threw herself across her boyfriend and exclaimed, "No! Don't you dare point that w-w—stick—at Vernon! I won't let you corrupt him with your freakish ways, I just won't!"

Surprised at her sister's display of emotion, Lily said, "I was only going to erase his mind from this event. I didn't think you would want him to know about my "abnormal" ways and my "crack-pot" school!"

"Vernon and I plan to get married anyway. I might as well tell him about you now, as to prepare him for your craziness," Petunia haughtily said.

"Tell me what," Vernon questioned.

"You are about to find out, follow me, Sweetums," Petunia softly ordered as she led him to the kitchen.

"Well, this looks like we're going to have a splendid week together. Simply splendid!" Alice exclaimed sarcastically.

"Thank Merlin you are here, Alice. Thank Merlin."

"Actually," Alice said thoughtfully, "you can thank Dumbledore. I was actually staying at Hogwarts for the summer—feels like bloody house arrest to be honest. He was the one who allowed me to come; I haven't been allowed to go anywhere since summer started."

"What? Why are you staying at Hog—wait a tic! Did you just curse?!" Lily asked in astonishment. "Now I'm really worried! Come sit down with me and tell me what's happened! It's not like we don't have time, with Petunia explaining an entire world to a retarded muggle, all the while adding tidbits and bloody insults about me!"

Alice nodded and obediently sat down next to her friend, who immediately wrapped her arms around Alice's shoulders, letting the warmth spread over her.

HAHA! Cliffy! I'm sorry, I couldn't resist! It's a first… lol Don't worry, I promise I'll update again soon. I actually feel satisfied with this entry since I'm more awake… it's only 10:23PM right now! Lol but school is starting tomorrow so I really must get some rest. Please review! You have no idea how much it means! I regret every time I've passed the review button after reading an author's story! Each review fills you with such warmth and pride in you and your story, and you feel so accomplished, really! I feel awful that I've deprived all these authors out of the extra spurt of happiness they need! I'm reviewing all the time now! 

Nighty-night,

Haley