AN- Alright everyone…this is it… the moment you all have been waiting for-hopefully. When starting this fic I was so unsure of the responses I would get, I was not even sure if I was going to finish the tale. Thank you. I can't say it enough. I want to thank each and every person that took a moment to review this story, to encourage me. You don't know how much you mean to me-Even the ones who threatened me because I'm so slow. You made my day.
One more quick note- there may be a sequel in the works, possibly. Let me know if it is something you would like to see.
PS- HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Standard Disclaimer- You know the drill.
Miracle Girl
Rating- PG-13
Chapter 7- To Pray for a Miracle
Ferio watched the unmoving figure, the doctor's words still ringing in his ears. The room was cold, but Ferio couldn't feel it. It had been hours since he had felt anything, his feelings locked tightly away. The doctor had been kind and gentle, telling him carefully Fuu's condition. He shut his eyes at the memory of the doctor's words and his reaction. His hand still hurt from clenching it so tightly. Slouching against the wall, Ferio's breaths came out uneven and shaky. He tried to steady his breathing, but found it impossible. Light filtered through a small window, snowflakes barely illuminated outside. Pale moonlight spilled through the otherwise dark room, matching his melancholy mood.
Standing up he moved to a chair, sitting down only for a moment before rising up again. He paced, the pitter patter of his steps loud and obtrusive in the otherwise silent room. Running a hand through his hair, he approached the figure, his eyes drinking in the paleness of her skin. Ferio had never felt such an overpowering feeling of helplessness before. He was a cop, he had handled robberies, murders, stabbings, he was trained to deal with every situation. So why did this one threaten to revoke his already wavering sanity? He didn't want his sister there, when she had heard the news she had tried to comfort him, tried to help. He didn't need that, didn't want to see her eyes full of sadness and understanding.
He wanted to shut today away, wanted to undue the past. But truly the only thing he needed was the woman sleeping. Her breath was shallow and barely audible against the harsh electronic sounds of the monitors and devices connected to her. Skin pale, it seemed almost translucent beneath the moon's light, the blackness of her eyelashes resting on her cheeks furthering the illusion. The hospital gown she wore seemed unnaturally large on her, and he had to keep reminding himself that she wouldn't shrink away. Sitting on the edge of the bed, carefully to not disturb her, he smoothed back a lock of hair from her forehead and felt the steady pulse beneath his fingers.
He allowed a slight smile to touch his lips as he noticed how mussed up her hair was. If she was awake she would have flustered at how silly she looked, and tried to flatten it out. His heart caught in his throat again. Taking a deep breath he shut his eyes, suppressing the pouring out of emotions that his body so desperately needed. He had no right to cry, no right to do anything. Ferio was living on a stolen life, a life he had been taken from the one person he wanted more than anything to protect. He leaned over her still figure, and kissed her forehead. It was cool to the touch.
He hadn't believed the doctor at first, hadn't trusted the words he had so carefully constructed. Sitting next to her now however, he knew them to be the truth. She had barely made it out of surgery, the blood loss more than her body could take. The doctors had worked diligently on her small frame, trying to restore a body that was more dead than alive. And they had succeeded. She indeed was alive, if barely. The final word was that it was likely that she wouldn't for awhile, if at all. He closed the last part of that thought away… she had to wake up. Fuu was too strong of a person to not wake up. She had survived so much, conquered so much, that to have it robbed at such a time wasn't possible. Taking another steadying breath, he did the only thing he could.
Kneeling carefully next to her bed, he cradled his head on his hands and began to do the only thing he could. Ferio began to pray. Raised Catholic, he hadn't prayed in ages, the very idea seeming silly to him after the age of ten. Now, he would just as easily have sold his soul to the devil if it meant he would have Fuu back.
"Please," his voice sounded defeated even to his ears, "Please don't take her away from me. I know I'm not perfect, but please…please…Don't take Fuu."
He sat still, the words repeating over and over out of his dry mouth to the point that he wasn't sure what he was saying. His knees began to hurt from the hard floor, and the bruise on Ferio's chest grew from a dull ache into a throbbing, but he ignored it. To get her back he would need nothing short of a miracle, and he would do whatever it took to make that happen.
Someone tapped on the door and it was hesitantly opened it, a shaft of light seeping into the quiet room. A dark silhouette fell over the ground, and he knew his time was up. Looking up from his hands at Fuu again, he took a brief moment to absorb the beauty she still possessed even while in a critical state. He felt his sister's small hand rest on his shoulders, and breathed out a sigh. She truly was his rock.
"Ferio," her voice was soft but strong, "It's time to go, the doctor wants to look at you."
Numbly nodding, Ferio dragged himself up onto his feet, grimacing at the pain in his joints. Vaguely he wondered how long he was kneeling next to Fuu, begging God to let her live. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he couldn't help but lean over Fuu one last time and kiss her lightly on the cheek.
"I'll be back soon."
Emeraude didn't say anything as they trudged down the white hallways to an examination room and he was thankful. He sat still as the same doctor that had treated Fuu poked and prodded at his chest.
"My son, this is one nasty bruise you have." the doctor felt deftly along Ferios ribs, "It doesn't look like anything is broken though, you are one lucky man."
Ferio couldn't help but chuckle sardonically at what the man had said. Lucky, yeah right. If he was lucky then why did it feel like he could never smile again? Why did his heart feel like it had been savagely twisted apart? Why was the most important person in the world dying because of him and his foolishness? If he was lucky, than for the rest of his life he wanted to be cursed.
Emeraude gave him a sharp look and he ignored it. He guessed that she couldn't see the irony of the situation.
"Well, I think what's best is for you to just get a good night of rest at home." the doctor's eyes flickered over Ferio's face, "However, I have a feeling that you might have some problems with that considering the state of my other patient."
Ferio didn't say anything, and the doctor nodded grimly.
"You can stay in a room down the hall where doctors take quick naps between long shifts. There are a couple of beds set up, you should be alright there." The doctor began to put his instruments away, "You can stay there until there is definitive information on the young lady's status."
Fuu's status. Whether or not she would wake, or become a permanent sleeping beauty. He shook slightly. She had to wake.
Ferio nodded numbly, he would sleep outside her door if he had to. Standing up carefully, he flinched at the pain in his chest and pulled his shirt back on.
"And I'd like you to take this, it will help ease your pain." The doctor held out his hand, the blue pill in his palm standing out against his skin. Ferio took the pill and swallowed it with a small cup of water. His mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton balls. His head felt full of cobwebs.
Rolling his shoulders, he exited the room after Emeraude and the doctor, already anxious to peek in on Fuu again. How soon would he be able to tell if her medical condition changed? What if something good or bad had happened already?
Zagato leaned against the wall in the hall, his rumpled hair matching his shirt. Emeraude's boyfriend's eyes were fixed on her, and Ferio felt a stab deep inside him when he saw the love between them. He couldn't help but be angry and jealous. He was sick with myself, filled with a deep ache for what he had possibly lost. Ferio watched him briefly, then brought a hand to his head. This night had brought a new side of him. A side that was darker, deeper, and much more frail.
Emeraude's back blurred slightly, and Ferio shook his head gently. He didn't need this now, his mind on its last reserves. She blurred again, this time the walls following suit, and Ferio felt his world spin. He sensed himself tipping, the task of maintaining his balance suddenly to much for him to bear.
Out of the corner of his eyes she watched Emeraude signal to Zagato, Zagato moving closer to catch him when he fell. And he knew now he would fall, the realization finally dawning on him as the doctor watched with concerned but not frightened eyes. That blue pill wasn't for giving his chest ease, it was for a dreamless sleep. One that Ferio had been desperately fighting, but just as desperately needed.
And it was indeed dreamless.
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He scratched at his five o'clock shadow, his body slumped over in what the nurse's referred to as 'his usual chair.' His clothing was wrinkled and disheveled, and his eyes had large bags under them. He hadn't moved in hours. The last light of the day filtered through the window, and a brilliant sunset burned in the sky. He felt nothing, no longer was he touched by anything in the world. Glancing at the clock hanging on the stark white wall, he gazed at his hands briefly. The doctor had made his last round over two hours ago. Had that much time really passed?
Emeraude had remarked to Ferio that she'd stop by today, Hikaru no doubt tagging along. He wouldn't deny that he was excited to see them. She had brought flowers and visited with him three if not more times a week- all five weeks that Ferio had been living here. Her last flowers, marigolds, sat at on the small bedside table. They were starting to droop, the very atmosphere of the room falling as the petals did.
Five weeks. Had that much time really passed? Five weeks since he had called the office, called Hikaru, and put in for emergency time off. Five weeks since his life had come crashing to a halt. Had it been so long since he had seen her brilliant smile, or heard her soft and sweet laughter? Five weeks since the last time he held her close and felt her hot breath on his neck? Five long since she had made him weak in the knees with one glance? Every image of her he had danced behind his eyelids every time he shut them. The memory of her both nurturing and slowly destroying him.
Ferio cleared his throat, and sipped at a glass of water. As silly as it sounded, at times, often late in the night, he found himself talking to Fuu. His mouth would open up and ramble for hours, every thought, fear, and hope coming out in a violent outburst. He would stop at times, almost certain that she would answer back. She never did, her body continually still as stone. Her features remaining serene and unexpressive. He would kill to see a smile.
He leaned his head back again and strained his ears. If he listened just so he could hear her breathing. The slow intake and outtake of oxygen a symphony to his ruined body.
The door was cautiously opened, and Hikaru's bright blue hat poked through the small space, followed by her equally tiny face. Her cheeks were rosy from the winter and her face was filled with a tentative but true smile. Ferio didn't have the will to smile, but the edges of his mouth did twitch slightly. Emeraude followed closely behind Hikaru, her own small frame wrapped in a huge winter coat, a bouquet of slightly wilted tulips clutched in her gloved hand. The two of them looked like thirteen year olds. Ferio glanced behind them and saw Lantis and Zagato settle themselves against the wall outside. The similarity in their looks astounding, and Ferio wondered briefly if they were related in some way. They had come along a few times, not wanting to intrude, but still wanting to show their support. And it touched Ferio.
"So how is she today?" Hikaru's voice was bright in the usually bleary room.
Emeraude moved the marigolds over to the window ledge, and replaced them with the tulips. The new flowers revitalized the room.
They asked this every time they came, and Ferio thanked them for it. Even if they were hear to check up on him, they were just as much there to check up on Fuu. And they realized that asking him how he was would be pointless, because he was nothing without Fuu.
Ferio stood and stretched. He walked over to her bedside and held her hand loosely in his. It felt cold. He prayed that she would squeeze it back- but it lay limply in his hand.
"The doctor says her condition hasn't changed."
His voice was flat and emotionless. He briefly thought back to those hours after yet another one of her check ups. Ferio had been hopeful, sure that something must have changed. The anger that had taken him hours to reign in still lingered beneath the surface. If the girls noticed they didn't say. Hikaru perched on the chair Ferio had vacated, and cocked her head to the side. Emeraude pulled off her coat and stood next to him. She placed a hand over his free one, and he waited to feel something. Pain. Hate. Sorrow. Anything. He felt nothing. Ferio was dying inside.
"Ferio, you should…you should go home…get a decent night of sleep, maybe -"
He removed his hand from hers more harshly than he intended to. This was not the first time they had tried to persuade him. Did they really think that he might agree to leaving her?
"Emeraude, what would you do in my situation? Would you leave Zagato's side, when for all you knew he could wake up with his next breath? Or that he could-"
Ferio didn't finish his sentence, his heavy heart cracking at his train of thought. He tried to keep his mind off the worst scenario. Emeraude didn't say anything, turning her head slightly to the side. Ferio could see the embarrassment and shame on her face. He was such a jerk. But even then, he couldn't or wouldn't change his behavior.
"She doesn't mean it like that." Hikaru voiced softly, still positioned like a small animal, "We know this isn't easy for you."
He nearly scoffed out loud. They couldn't understand the depth of torment he faced. The agony of everyday. The waiting. They could try all they wanted, but they would never know. Ferio wanted to scream at them. They didn't know anything. There was no way they could know. How could they possibly understand? His heart was nailed to a tree, each heart beat slowly draining his life away. He didn't say anything.
Hikaru reached around to a duffle bag slung across her back. Ferio could still see how horrible she felt. How awful they both felt. He brushed the guilt aside, along with the other emotions that he had discarded over time. Pulling it off her arm, she set it next to Fuu's bed,
"We brought you some clean clothes."
"Thanks." It didn't matter, he hadn't even noticed that his clothes were dirty.
He noticed nothing.
He avoided their eyes, avoided their obvious body language. They could see it even better then he could, and it scared them. Ferio was deteriorating. He was a shell of the man he used to be. Ferio brushed a lock of green hair out of his eyes. He didn't know what to do. The only thing he was sure of was that leaving Fuu was out of the question.
Grasping the bag from Hikaru, he nodded his thanks. He didn't know what action would satisfy them. They could provide for his bodily needs, clean clothes, rest, sanitation, but they couldn't help him with his sanity. Only Fuu could.
"Alright, I'm going to go change, I'll only be gone for a minute. Keep on eye on Fuu for me."
Hikaru and Emeraude exchanged a look.
"Okay."
Emeraudes voice was soft. It was obvious that she didn't know what else could be done.
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Ferio rearranged the slightly worn tulips next to Fuu's bed, and gazed out the window. The last time his sister had visited hadn't gone well. Not that he didn't know why. Hikaru and Emeraude had practically begged for Ferio to start taking care of himself. He knew that brushing them off wouldn't work too much longer. They were getting seriously troubled.
He turned back to Fuu's prone figure and drank in her form. Sitting carefully next to her, carefully avoiding any sudden disjointing movements he ran his hand over her cheek. She looked a little healthier today, a little bit of color returning to her cheeks. It strengthened his soul.
Fuu strengthened him in every way.
"Did I ever tell you about how I met my sister?"
His voice was soft but clear in the otherwise silent room. He had told her bits and pieces about himself over the past few weeks, but had never really touched on his childhood. He was sure that she could hear him, sure that every word he spoke she soaked into her soul.
"I didn't meet her until I was eighteen or so." He squeezed her hand, memories coming back in full swing, "I didn't know that I was adopted, didn't know that I was anything."
He adjusted her hair.
"I was sort of running with the wrong crowd, did a lot of stupid things, and after finding out that I was adopted…I was even angrier if possible." He shook his head sadly at the memory, "I hated my adoptive parents for hiding it from me, hated my real parents for giving me up. Hated the world. So I did a lot more stupid things. You wouldn't even have recognized me Fuu."
Ferio briefly recalled some of his stupidest actions. Did he really think that they would have no consequences? That nothing could touch him? He touched his nose than face carefully. The scars were a prominent reminder of what his foolishness had done.
"When I realized I had a sister, I didn't know what to think. Do I meet her? Do I ignore her? At that time, I was still so young. I decided to, but only to stick it to her, to tell her that I hated her. That I hated everything. After I met her though, I found that I couldn't. I found-"
He held his breath, his eyes going wide. Ferio could have sworn that Fuu had moved. That her hand had squeezed his just slightly. Sitting in the dark however, he wasn't sure if it was his imagination. It had played tricks on him before. Leaning over, he flipped on the bedside light, and watched her. He shut his eyes briefly at the sudden light, anxious to have his sight return. Opening them carefully, he watched her through slightly pained eyes. The lamp cast a glow on her features, her beauty looking as ethereal as a goddess's. His blood raced through his veins and his heart hammered painfully against his chest. He held his breath, and examined her face, looking for any and all signs.
There it was again, a slight shifting- this time in her face. A grimace on her usually frozen features. He stayed still, unsure of what to do. Was she dreaming? Waking? Was something wrong? Ferio refused to blink, refused to breath, refused to move.
Her eyelids fluttered, and time stopped.
"Oh God please let me not be dreaming."
Ferio didn't even realize that he had spoken out loud. His hand clutched at hers in a death grip, and he strained his ears for any abnormal noise. Her eyes opened slowly, the green unfocused orbs staring blankly at the ceiling. She moaned slightly, and blinked repeatedly, her mind slowly coming into focus. Ferio didn't feel the hot tears on his cheeks.
He watched her mind slowly take in the surroundings. The unfamiliar ceiling, the white walls, the unopened window. Shaking slightly he waited for her to notice him. He was too shocked to move, to shocked to speak. What if she hated him? It was his fault she was there, his fault she was injured. What if she never wanted to see him again? He didn't think that it was possible to live without her. She had said that she loved him. Would she take it back? He treasured her words, treasured their time together. Would she want it to end?
Her head shifted slightly in his direction, and he watched her eyes squint at him. Her eyes were still beautiful, still heart stopping. A deep swirling glow that truly was a gateway to her soul. She didn't give off any reaction to his presence. In fact, she looked more confused than surprised or angry. Her hand stiffened in his, and he slowly untangled it. Fuu was probably so overrun with emotions of hate, that even touching him was painful. He had to give her a few minutes to adjust. He felt his heart crack. Ignoring the pain, he reached for the phone. The doctor would need to know that she woke up.
"Hello? Who's there?"
Her voice was scratchy and unused, but still raised goosebumps on his flesh. The noise was like water to a dying man, and he wondered how he had survived so long without it. Ferio's hand froze in mid air. He cocked an eyebrow at her question. Didn't she recognize him? Her hand went up towards her face, and it hit him.
She wasn't wearing her glasses. He doubted she could see her own hand clearly, let alone his face. Grabbing them off the counter, he put the new frames that he had gotten for her in her hand. Watching her with trepidation, she slowly slid the lenses onto her face. Fuu's hand shook slightly, still weak and tired. Her eyes, this time in focus, took in the room once more. From her vantage point, Ferio knew the dark hospital room would be foreign and menacing.
Her eyes swiveled toward him, and he found himself frozen. Her eyes widened at the sight of him, and he felt his stomach in his throat. How long had he waited and prayed for this moment? How long had he begged God to let her open her eyes? He felt a smile on his lips, an allowed it to grow. Even if she hated him, even if she never wanted to see him again- she was alive and awake.
"Ferio?"
His name on her lips was almost his undoing. It sounded like a caress on the wind and twisted his mind into inappropriate places. Clutching his hands into tight fists, he fought to keep his hands off her. She had to do what she wanted and was bound to be confused. Fuu struggled slightly, and Ferio put his hands on her shoulders.
"Please, don't strain yourself."
His voice sounded far away.
"Ferio. Please…what's wrong?"
There were tears in her eyes. She reached her hands toward him, straining her tired muscles. Not needing any encouragement, Ferio wrapped his arms tightly around her, crushing her form to his. She shook against him, sobs beginning to rack her worn frame. He clutched at her, afraid that he was dreaming. He shifted lightly, terrified that his weight would crush her. She pressed her tear stained face into the crook of his neck, and pulled harder at him. He breathed her scent in deeply. Even having been asleep in a hospital for weeks didn't diminish it.
"Ferio…"
Her voice came out broken and wretched. He held her while she sobbed, stroking her back- his body still recovering from the shock. Fuu didn't hate her. She was awake and in his arms. And she was glad to be in his arms. Her eyes had opened. Fuu's beautiful green eyes. Keeping her tight in his embrace, he held her until her sobbing subsided. Laying her down gently, he untangled her arms from his. Fuu protested slightly, and he kissed her nose. She scrunched hers up slightly, but didn't make any more protests.
Ferio grasped an untouched glass of water that he had poured for himself earlier and handed it to her. He helped her sit up. Not needing any encouragement, she drank deeply from it. Licking her lips, she finished it off. Putting the glass down, he grasped her hand tightly and kissed the back of her hand, while at the same time helping her lay back down. She blushed crimson, and he couldn't help but smile.
"I missed your blush."
The moment the words left his mouth, he realized just how true they were. He cupped the side of her face, and brushed a stray lock from her forehead. He brought his hand back to his side, realizing that he hadn't stopped touching her since she'd wakened. And what more, he didn't want to stop.
"I was afraid that you'd never open your eyes again."
There, he had done it- He had said the words that had been haunting him. The words that had threatened to destroy him on more than one occasion. She sank a little lower in her bed, and tilted her head to the side. At that moment, she looked just like an exotic and stunning bird.
"Ferio, I don't ever want to leave your side."
It was obvious that she was exhausted. Her voice was full of love and concern, the water having eased her ability to speak, but unable to ease the other damage to her frame. He was once again amazed at how caring she was. Ferio leaned forward and kissed her cheek. And Fuu wanted to be by his side forever. Forever- Him and Fuu. Not that he would ever let her go. Worried about her health, he realized that it might be time to let the world know that she was awake.
"You're going to be okay Fuu, but I have to get the doctor to come check on you, okay?"
He started to stand up, when Fuu's hand latched onto his. Looking down at her form, he couldn't help but grin. Blond hair splayed around her head like an angel's halo, large green eyes watching him, her pink lips were half open as she made a protesting noise, she was truly breathtaking.
"Ferio?" her voice was breathy, "Can I ask you a favor?"
Curious, he sat back down.
"Of course, anything Fuu."
He would fall off the world for her.
"Could you…that is…" She was clearly getting flustered, "I would really like to…."
"Fuu?"
She buried her face in her hand.
"…kiss me…"
Her voice was barely audible. The blush that had previously flourished on her face grew exponentially. Ferio smirked slightly, and lowered himself onto the edge of her bed. Grasping the hand covering her face, he pulled it away. If possible her blush grew deeper. He lowered his face close only inches from hers. Her breath grew ragged and he kissed the edge of her lips.
"I was hoping you'd ask me that."
He kissed her deeply, pouring out every emotion he had been feeling the last five weeks. Despite her weakness, she responded quickly, wrapping her arms around his neck in a vice grip. She moaned against his mouth, and he tried desperately to memorize her. They way her body felt against his, the way her tongue danced with his, the feel of her arms around his neck, he tried to absorb the world of Fuu that he so completely immersed himself in.
He knew that this wasn't the end for them. Their was still a long road of healing in front of them, for both of them. Things that he needed to tell her, a past she needed to resolve- he understood that in many ways this truly was the beginning. But none of that mattered if she was there with him. He loved her, loved every part of her and would help her in any way he could.
Fuu was the best thing to ever happen to him, the most wonderful thing to ever happen to him. She was his miracle. And if it took him the rest of his life, he would show her just how much she meant to him. Resting one of his hands on a small box in his pocket, he checked its placement for reassurance. He was looking forward to a lifetime filled with Fuu.
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TO THE READERS- To be honest, when it came to this story and others that I am working on, I have come to realize a certain truth. I am probably one of the sappiest people out there. I love happy endings, and I love things that pull just so on the heart strings. I hope this story left you with a smile on your face.