Chapter Five (Written by Rei Nokato)
He'll look away soon... Any minute now... Stupid fruity fancy-pants...
Inertgrey eyes remained ogling at a face revealed by greasepaint.
Stop staring at me!
Dorian's gaze lingered. Rodney's face twitched with a bothered smile.
There are a million things to stare at in this place! Stare at the fire... or the carpet! Surely the carpet is more interesting than me!
The League's captive smirked, leaning frontward a bit in his restraints.
"Mr. Skinner?" The Immortal whispered softly, in a tone that indicated something.
The thief jumped a little. After an hour of silence you would too.
"Surely you're not frightened to untie me now..." Dorian's voice trailed off.
"Of course not," The thief shifted in his chair uncomfortably, "but for saying that, you deserve the luxury of a punch."
Gray cringed as he readied himself for a knock on the face.
Skinner sniggered. "Oho! What a pun!" He walked towards the alcohol cabinet and grabbed a pitcher full of orange liquor. He poured it into the smallest glass he could find and came back to Dorian. "Thirsty?" He brought the glass close to the prisoner's face.
Dorian tilted forward a tad more to reach the goblet. To his astonishment, instead of indulging a fine icy punch, he found it speckled all over his well-groomed appearance.
"Hahaha!!!" Skinner mocked loudly. Dorian's face grew, innocently enough, childlike. Skinner stopped abruptly in his own humour as he became aware of this. "Look, I'm sorry, pal. I just spent an hour with you gazing at me oh so intently while I tried to benefit from the silence... You deserved it. Now stare in another direction or I'll find a first class blindfold for you." The Invisible Man returned to his seat.
Dorian shook with a bizarre hilarity.
"Mr. Skinner, do you truly assume these chain links will hold me back all night?" The Immortal leered.
"Bloody right they will." Skinner spoke, his customary pride reappearing.
"Are you sure?" Gray murmured. "I am beginning to recuperate my strength -"
"My good man, would you please refrain from ruining the serenity?" Dorian stayed silent in response. "Thank you."
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Numerous hours slowed by. Skinner was not allowed to doze in the presence of Dorian Gray, as ordered by his teammates.
The skies were cerulean. Clouds had drifted by over the hours, but now not a single shade was to be seen.
Skinner had never been a natural at bullying. That's why shortly after he had beleaguered Dorian of his smugness he had decided to give him an undersized swig of sherry. On the other hand, Rodney's slyness had come through once more; He had spiked it.
He presumed that was why Gray was sound asleep. However, the drug would make him restless in due time...
For the first time in a week Skinner began to have half-dreams. He would always awaken from them when any sound was made in the real world.
Welcome... to the real world... I can't believe I just said that... Dammit... Why am I thinking out loud?
Rodney ultimately slipped into a power-nap. He couldn't prevent himself since he was so fatigued.
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He awoke quite suddenly just before dawn. In dread, knowing he had probably slumbered for roughly four hours, he sat up quickly and glanced directly at where Dorian was last seated.
Restraints were on the ground. Some looked like they had been snapped by force and several seemed to have been viciously gnawed through. The chair was tipped over on its back.
Skinner shoved his fist in his mouth, stopping an aggressive word from escaping.
He had a slight idea of Dorian's course. The carpet was faintly crumpled near the door, suggesting he had tripped over on exit.
He supposed Dorian was most likely to be running rampant somewhere. The drug must have finally kicked in.
He hurriedly turned the radio on, which sat beside his chair on a quaint stand.
Expecting to hear breaking news concerning the wrongdoings of Dorian Gray, the thief was staggered to perceive a song playing. It was playing so softly that he could only make out a low whirr.
He turned it up so the tune was bouncing off the walls of the library.
"GAAAAYBARRR!!!! I WANNA TAKE YOU TO A GAYBAR!!!" The radio screeched. Rodney yelled with fright. He twisted the dial to another frequency.
"I feel pretty! Oh so pretty!" He was slightly perturbed by the song, but it made no indication whatsoever of queerness, therefore he left it on. He increased the volume slightly to let the noise flow through him, calming him of his last shock. The song unforgivably continued. "I feel pretty and witty and GAAAY!"
The Invisible Man switched the thing off completely. He was shuddering and twitching.
It took him a few minutes to regain his composure. He stood up and checked the shelf where he had previously discovered the book of Karma Sutra. He gawped as he looked across the top of the bookcase. Volume after volume of factual Karma Sutra, crammed into the one section.
"'Ello!" He pulled one out smoothly. The next thing he knew he was bombarded by a landslide of Karma Sutra books.
Before long, all of the sounds of books falling and pages creasing ended. There was a minute silence before Skinner pulled himself out of the pile.
Eyebrows raised, he scraped up one of the books. On the spine it read:
Vol. XXI
"Holy..." Rodney dropped it. He picked up another. This time it read:
Vol. XXXXV
He was just about to slip the mini-novel into his pocket when he heard what sounded like someone having a head-on collision with a door.
Forgetting the idea of theft, he moved toward the top of the stairway outside the library. He stared down at the entrance hall where he identified Mr. Dorian Gray.
The Immortal was currently shirtless. His locks were in disorder and he seemed to be embracing a chicken. The poor hen was in complete confusion, its wings flapping constantly. Feathers were shooting out everywhere, covering the excellently polished floor in a frenzy of fluff.
Dorian closed the front door and bolted up the stairs, flapping his arms and waving the disorientated chicken in different directions.
Skinner gulped. He paced calmly into the library once again, his mind racing. What if Dorian attempted to... violate him? He could defend himself without a doubt, so the concern was immediately put aside.
He took his seat and tried hard not to choke on his own uneven breath.
Gray dashed into the room towards the window.
"'Ey! 'Ey!" Skinner started. He was suddenly afraid Dorian would jump out of the window with the chicken held over his head, thinking it could fly him over the rooftops of London.
On the rooftops of London... Gaww... What a sight... Lalalalalalala Chimchimeny-! -bang-
Skinner approached Dorian without hesitation.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Skinner grabbed Dorian's shoulder and shook him roughly, seeing as he didn't appear to be listening.
Gray bounced as he lobbed the chicken out the window.
"BE FREEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!! BE FREEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!" Dorian shrieked.
Rodney watched as the flustered bird descended into a waste bin. He stared a bit longer, enough to see the garbage roll out onto the road. He snapped back to his senses when Dorian tripped over the floor covering.
Gray clapped whilst jumping up and down manically when he managed to get up.
The racket was brought to a standstill. Dorian gawked at Skinner as he had done before under any influence. An idea came to the dazed man; obvious by the way he clapped his hand over his mouth and gasped.
Rodney seated himself on a chair. He looked urgently outside at the sky. No sign of the sun yet.
Perkily, Gray halted at the centre of the room. There was a small silence before he broke into song.
"I LOVE YOU BAYYYBAAYY!!! AND IF IT'S QUITE ALRIGHT, I NEED YOU BAYYYBAY -"
"Oh no."Dorian ran towards the Gentleman Thief with his arms extended in a bear hug. Skinner stood up and stepped to one side.
In an amazing stunt, Gray jumped onto the chair and made a magnificent flip over it. The feat was indeed finished, however, when he hit the floor and the chair fell backwards on top of him.
Rodney thought Dorian had been knocked out, but as he ambled nearer to the chair, he made out a muffled humming.
He stood uneasily, considering what his next action ought to be. He decided in about two seconds. He strolled to the pile of Karma Sutra paperbacks.
As Rodney opened up Volume XII, the chair that buried Dorian against the floor sprang back up to its preceding spot. Gray crawled to the heart of the library for the second time and leapt to his feet. Skinner flinched when Dorian out of the blue began singing yet again.
"You're just too good to be true!! Can't take my eyes off you!!!"
For a few rather absurd minutes, Gray danced brightly and tried a small number of disastrous cartwheels. He then grabbed his cane and tried waltzing with it. When he attempted the circus approach, flipping his top hat and such, he grew off balance and careened into a wall. He fell and smacked onto the floorboards.
Skinner shrugged after watching Dorian's performance and returned his attention to the book of Karma Sutra.
The tip of the sun's crest shone over the East Docks of London. The League would be here any minute now, Rodney thought joyously.
He slid the book into his jacket and made his way to the door.
"So long, Dorian! Hope you had a nice trip! Aha! I crack myself up." Rodney laughed quietly to himself, wondering if anyone would someday be entertained by his lame jokes. PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!!!!!!!
He marched down the staircase. "That's the last time I slip him drugs." He whispered.
The Invisible Man was wrong in thinking the antics were done. For at that very moment, Dorian had just completed preparing his next extravagant act.
Skinner looked up as the ceiling shook. Dorian had tripped over again. The professional thief halted his gaze at the top of the stairwell.
There was a loud scuffing before Dorian appeared looking down at him. The hyper Immortal was no longer wearing his striped pants. He was now simply clothed in grey socks and boxer shorts. Rodney noticed quite suddenly that Gray was wearing his pince-nez. He had taken them off before he had fallen asleep and had forgotten to put them back on.
"OI! TAKE THEM GLASSES OFF!" Skinner roared at the Immortal. Next thing he knew his pince-nez had been thrown down into the entrance hall. He heard the chink of something breaking into pieces.
Rodney was about to holler with rage, but he was cut short by Dorian's unexpected outburst of song.
"I FEEEEEEEEEEEEEL GOOD!!! Nanananananana!" Gray skidded and tripped down a few stairs. Rodney merely blinked and continued walking.
Dorian made the effort of standing up. When he was on two feet again, he sat on the stair rail and slid down it at a dangerous speed.
"I FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!" Dorian's song was delayed when he tumbled backwards off the rail. He plummeted down the stairwell.
Skinner had just reached the entrance hall when this happened. He glanced upwards to see Dorian falling at a rapid velocity.
The Gentleman Thief swore. He sprinted to the bottom of the stairwell and dived to catch Dorian.
Rodney stopped sliding across the floor. He halted right underneath the Immortal.
An intense pain shot through the Invisible Man's back. He shut his eyes firmly and clenched his teeth and fists. His eyes watered and he let out a suffocated cry of pain.
The light of the morning sun shone on him, somewhat peacefully.
A moment of silence occurred after that. The calmness was shattered, however, when Dorian began bouncing cruelly on his back.
"Hee! Squishy!" The Immortal commented irrelevantly.
Skinner lost it. "GE' OFF ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" With a tremendous effort, he slipped out from beneath Dorian. The influence of drugs making him look quite lost indeed, Dorian stared widely at him with huge shining eyes.
The pain in his back shot through Rodney unceasingly and he collapsed helplessly.
The last thing he recognised was Dorian's sweetly innocent voice. "Oopsie..."
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"Oh, I hope he didn't hurt you, Skinner..." A whisper echoed through him.
A dim light glowed through his eyelids... Candlelight.
He could feel his jacket and blankets covering him. His neck was supported by a soft pillow. There was a light weight beside where he lay. A hand stroked his back gently.
His memory failed him for a moment as he tried hard to remember what had happened to him... And why did his back feel so heavily bruised?
His eyes snapped open. He sat bolt upright.
"GE' AWAY FROM ME!!!!" He flailed his arms to the side where he sensed someone was sitting.
A woman screamed as Skinner's arm connected with something.
He cursed under his breath. He had just whacked Mina Harker over the face. She licked blood off her lip, as if she were threatening him.
"Whoops! Heh! Sorry, love!" Rodney sat up hastily and patted her on the head. "Thought you were Dorian. I mean, you look enough like a man - I mean - I need a do-over!"
Mina gathered all of her strength and gave Skinner a fairly malicious punch.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!" Rodney wailed as Harker laughed very openly at him. "Oh yeah, sure! Just beat up the defenceless guy. Yeah! That sounds like a brilliant plan!"
The vampire departed the room silently.
"I could really use that do-over now!" Skinner called after her.
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Meanwhile, on top of scraps inside a dumpster situated in an alley, Dorian began to stir from his short morning nap.
He hastily rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. His eyes flickered for a few moments.
He groaned softly. His throat ached and his voice felt much worn out. His muscles were exhausted. He felt an unpleasant chill as a dreadful draught swept over him.
He slothfully propped himself up on his elbows, grumbling inaudibly as he pulled his head up.
Two beady eyes looked up at him suspecting. It was a cock. AAAAAHHHH!!!!!! I think I'll change that word.
REI! How dare you cut out that word! YAY for COCK! :D (Jin, obviously)
It was a chicken. It ruffled its wings cautiously, as though preparing itself for a hug from Dorian.
The Immortal rested his chin on his chest, bewilderment finally coming to him.
He rested on top of the garbage. "Where am I?" He muttered, closing his eyes to block out the morning sunlight. "What happened?"
Something wet and sodden hit his chest very suddenly. He flinched and looked at the fowl sitting on top of him. It squawked affectionately as a reply.
Dorian sat up with difficulty. He took a wild glance at his surroundings. His confusion made him feel terribly sick, so he lay back down on the trash.
He struggled to keep himself from giving reality the slip, but eventually he became unaware of everything. With that, his senses shut down and he entirely passed out.