Elsa had managed to avoid her mother for six days, which was a record on her part. Because even though certain topics could sometimes bring out the worst in them, the mother-daughter pair were undeniably close. The last time they'd gone this long without even a glimpse of each other would have been when Elsa was still in boarding school.
The two were surprisingly adept at avoiding each other, never quite meeting, like two negative ends of a magnet. Neither would admit that they were intentionally avoiding the other, and when asked by the palace staff, there was always a flimsy yet believable excuse.
"I plan on retiring early."
"I'd rather take my dinner in the garden."
"I've got embroidery to catch up on."
Only Anna knew the truth.
Elsa debated on whether or not to discuss the issue with Honeymaren. After all, she was her best friend and close confidante. But she wasn't sure how the whole marriage thing would play out, and its unpredictability terrified her. She wouldn't have told anyone about it at all, except Anna just happened to walk in on her sob session, and to her surprise, she was finding some comfort in being able to share things with her.
Even though she hadn't wanted to talk about it at first, she found herself surprisingly warming to her. Opening up, at least a little bit.
"I don't want to have to be forced to marry a man I've just met," she lamented that Saturday morning as Anna mended a ripped sleeve on one of her father's old blazers. "Even if I get to court with him for a few months before I'm crowned, it just wouldn't feel like love. Or whatever love's supposed to feel like."
Anna, to her credit, always listened attentively. Elsa knew that it was probably because she was her boss, but that didn't matter. Anna took her side on the matter, and that felt good.
"I think arranged marriages are outdated," she agreed. "People should just be allowed to marry who they want. Marry anyone, or everyone, or no one. It's your life, you know? The only person you should be thinking about is you."
"If only." Elsa exhaled sharply. "I'm a princess. My life is the kingdom's life. The kingdom's life is mine. There's no escaping that reality."
"Can't you just tell the queen you need more time?" Anna suggested.
"She wants me to be wed by my twenty-first birthday. She's made that clear." Elsa noticed Anna's frown and quickly cleared her throat. "But never mind. I don't want to talk about this anymore." That was partly true, but something Elsa didn't want to admit to herself was that she just really hated seeing Anna frown. "You said you got into suitmaking because of your mother?"
The redhead immediately brightened, and Elsa calmed at the physical change. "Yeah! Well, just dresses with Mom. The suits are a whole other story."
Elsa quirked a brow. "Do tell."
"It was after I moved into Madam Frosk's attic. I was really down, for obvious reasons, but the girls at the shop looked out for me, more than my guardian ever did. They made sure I always had food to eat and that I was always warm enough in the winter. They brought me books and trinkets and art supplies to keep me entertained. Madam Frosk didn't really care whether or not I showed up for work those first few weeks. Then one day, my coworker brought me a magazine." Anna's eyes practically sparkled. "It was the first time I had ever seen one. It was a fashion magazine, and she brought it to me from France, which is pretty much the fashion capital of the world."
The princess smiled, amused at how enraptured Anna was getting in her tale. Usually, she was able to multitask, holding a conversation while she sewed or cut fabric or measured something, but now, her needle was stuck in a pin-cushion, blazer draped over her knees as she made wild, excited hand gestures while she spoke.
"There were so many great designers in there, but funnily enough, the one whose work caught my attention isn't even French. She's American, and her work puts everyone else to shame."
"What's her name?" Elsa prompted, that same amused smile on her face.
"Edna Mode," Anna swooned. "A visionary. She makes something for everyone, and she can make whatever she wants. Dresses, suits, she even has a line of pyjamas."
"That's impressive."
Anna picked up the needle again to finish up the last corner. "So how did you get into suit wearing?"
Elsa chewed gently on her bottom lip. There were two versions of the story, one of which was far easier to digest than the other. "I was twelve or thirteen," she began. "It was winter, and a cold one at that. We were out riding one night and I had refused to bring a coat. I thought the cold wouldn't have bothered me."
"I remember that winter," Anna recalled. "It was freezing."
"That's what my mother told me, but I was a stubborn teenager and still refused. So surprise surprise, I got cold." Elsa chuckled. "My father took pity on me and gave me his coat, and God, it was the biggest, sturdiest thing I had ever worn. It swallowed me up in its sleeves like a warm hug. I'd never worn anything like it before. Girls' clothes are all so dainty and delicate, but clothes like that just… don't exist."
"Maybe one day they will. There are millions of designers out there. You never know what'll be the next great thing someone comes up with," Anna looked on sympathetically as she tied off the last stitch. "But for now, you can try this on. I adjusted the fit a little so it should be less boxy now."
Elsa rose from her seat. She wasn't wearing the binder so she worried a little about how it would feel around her chest, but she tried it on nonetheless. Anna observed from the sidelines. It wasn't her design, but she still felt proud of the work she did, especially seeing it on the princess. The brown blazer was now a more appropriate size, cinching slightly at Elsa's waist. It still felt a little tight at her chest, but nothing the binder wouldn't fix later.
"Looking dapper." Elsa burst out laughing, and Anna blushed. "What?" she said through a smile.
"Nothing, I just…" The princess turned in the mirror, catching a glimpse of her side profile. "No one's ever said that to me before."
"Well, I guess no one usually sees you wearing this stuff," Anna pointed out before faltering slightly. "Were you okay with me saying that?"
"Yes!" Elsa blurted out. She blushed at her minor outburst and collected herself. "Yes. I do look quite dapper." She struck a pose in the mirror, making the two of them burst out laughing once again.
Just then, the women startled at a knock on the door. They weren't given any time to think before Honeymaren poked her head in. "Elsa, the queen has asked if you want to go riding with her."
She… what? "She asked?" Honeymaren nodded.
Queen Iduna rarely asked Elsa of anything. That was probably an exaggeration, but Elsa had definitely been feeling that way since the whole marriage thing came up. Usually, she was summoned, and she came when called, as any good princess did. But this time, Elsa had a choice. She'd been given a choice. That had to mean something, right?
"Did she say why?"
"She didn't mention anything, just that she'll be at the stables if you say yes." Honeymaren was gone before she could say anything more. Elsa and Anna stared at each other, the princess' mind clouded with thoughts.
"Do you wanna go?" Anna asked, finally breaking the silence.
"I… don't know."
Anna found herself suddenly on her feet, next to the princess. They stared at each other in the mirror. "Have you spoken to your mom about any of this?"
"I've not seen her since… since I was in her study and she showed me the invitations." The memories still made her shudder.
"Well, then maybe you should go meet her," Anna suggested. "It could be good for you guys to talk things out."
"I don't know, Anna." Elsa shrugged off the blazer, as if just talking about her mother would someone expose her true nature to her. Like her face would materialise in the mirror and see everything wrong with her daughter. "I don't want to meet her only to have another fight."
"Then don't have another fight," she replied, as if it was that simple. "Stay calm, relaxed and just talk things through. And if things start to get a bit much, you could always leave."
"I couldn't do that."
"Sure you can! I walked out of arguments with Madam Frosk all the time. Sometimes you just have to do what's better for you. Right now, talking to the queen would be better for you, but if that situation changes and leaving becomes the better option, then make the change and do that instead."
Elsa drew strength from Anna's support, watching her beaming face in the mirror. It had been a week. Surely things had cooled down. "Maybe I should give it a try."
XXX
Queen Iduna pulled on the reins of her reindeer, bringing herself to a halt when she caught sight of her daughter. She'd been trotting around the stables for the last ten minutes, needing something to do with all the restless energy bottled up in her. "Elsa."
"Hi."
"I wasn't sure if you were coming."
Elsa shrugged awkwardly. "I'm here."
She offered her daughter a small smile. "Nokk's all saddled up. Care to join me for a ride?"
Nokk had been the pony Elsa learned to ride on when she was a girl. They practically grew up together, and she took comfort in the familiarity of his mane under her fingers when she pet him. Elsa took a deep breath to calm herself. She was already dressed in her riding gear, so she mounted the horse and the two of them set off.
They rode in silence, their steeds trotting along at a steady pace. The palace shrank behind them as they worked their way down the well-trodden path, the one Elsa had learned to ride on back when she was a girl. Elsa felt the tight anticipation in her chest slowly dissipate as she focused on the rhythm of the ride. Her mother seemed calm. She smiled at her. There was no indication of the anger they'd shown each other just a week ago. Maybe it would be okay.
"I know I'm hard on you." Iduna broke the silence, eyes fixed on the horizon. "But that's because I want you to reach your fullest potential. Ruling over a kingdom is hard. I want to give up the crown knowing that you have all the tools you need to succeed. And that includes a husband, as much as you don't like it. You need someone supporting you other than your mother."
So the issue wasn't forgotten. "I have Kai and the royal council," Elsa reasoned as evenly as she could manage. "I've spent my life preparing to take the throne on my own. What was the point of all that if I was just going to end up marrying some man I don't even know?"
"You and I both know this was always going to be your future, my dear." When Elsa looked at her mother, she was surprised to see how sad she looked. Not angry. Not frustrated. Just pure, unadulterated sadness. "I know this isn't what you want, but unfortunately, this is the path that has been set out for you, and for every royal who has come before you. It's necessary for Arendelle to progress and prosper."
"I don't want to just marry out of necessity, Mother." It was practically a plea, and the queen flinched at her daughter's desperation. "Like how you didn't want to marry Johan."
Iduna sighed. That was a fair point. Marrying Johan in the village when she was a young woman would have been a safe option that secured her a stable future. It was necessity, plain as day. But she hadn't wanted to marry out of necessity. So she fought to marry Agnarr instead.
"I wasn't a royal," Iduna replied. "There were no stakes if I did or didn't marry Johan."
"But there were stakes when you decided to marry Father."
The two looked at each other sadly. "I know you want what's best for the kingdom—"
"I'm your mother," she interrupted gently. "I want what's best for you. And I genuinely believe that your betrothal is what's best. I've been running this kingdom alone for the past three years. Even with Kai and Gerda and the royal council, it's hard. It's… lonely." A stab of grief hit Elsa right in the chest, mixed with the unwelcome yet underlying feeling of guilt. She lost her father, but they were bound by blood. She couldn't even imagine losing someone you loved by choice, someone you fell completely and utterly in love with. "I'm sorry that I snapped at you, Elsa. I just… I don't want to see you struggle like I've been struggling."
"But you run the kingdom so well."
Iduna pressed her lips into a thin line. "Some parts of running a kingdom are private. Even from the princess."
Elsa felt a familiar sting creep up behind her eyes, but she forced herself to swallow it down. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "That I'm here. This would all be so much easier if—" Her voice cracked. "If you had a son."
"Oh, Elsa." Iduna brought her reindeer to a halt, and gave the verbal command for Nokk to stop too. They were right next to each other, and Iduna placed a tender hand on Elsa's cheek. "Never in a million years would I think that. You're my daughter, and I wouldn't change that for the world. Don't ever apologise for being here, because I am so glad that you are."
She told herself she wouldn't cry, but she felt her tear ducts betray her when a single searing teardrop fell down her cheek. "I know I'm a big disappointment to you. I can't even entertain the thought of an arranged marriage, but I know I need to do it."
"Putting up a fight against something you don't want to do is a natural reaction. I can't fault you for that." Iduna took out a handkerchief and gently wiped Elsa's tears away. "You have been the perfect daughter, Elsa. You always accommodate me, and I don't think I thank you enough for doing that. This is just you forging your own path. I can't expect you to agree with me all the time. That's just something that I have to learn to accept. But darling, I don't ever want you to think that I'd rather have a son here than you."
Elsa sniffled delicately, thanking her lucky stars that this didn't spiral into a full-on ugly cry. "The kingdom would do so much better with a prince."
Iduna leaned over, almost falling off her reindeer when she captured Elsa in a tight hug. "The kingdom is lucky to have you as their princess."
Elsa buried her head in her mother's shoulder, like she did when she was a girl, taking in the familiar scent of her perfume. After so many days of avoiding each other, she had missed this. "Thank you, Mother."
"Now." Iduna pulled back, taking Elsa's hands in hers. "You know a decision still has to be made, but I am willing to compromise."
"Compromise?" she asked warily,
"I've thought about this a lot over the past week. You will still need to be married, but there shouldn't be a deadline for it. If you haven't found someone by your coronation, then that will be okay." Elsa felt the tension leave her body like a rush of air. "You can court in your own time, but until I know you're seeking people out on your own, I still want you to try my method. None of the matchmaking letters have been sent out yet so you can still go through them. But you can at least try to meet some men from other kingdoms, even if it's just to get to know them. Think of it as preparatory democracy. There'll be no stakes, but as your mother, all I can ask for you is to try."
That deal was considerably better than what she thought she would have had to face. It gave her time to get used to the idea of being married. It let her take things at her own pace. "And if I really don't like anyone I've been set up with?"
Iduna sighed. "It would be unfortunate, but at least you can say with confidence that you gave it a shot. You're still welcome to seek out anyone you'd like, no matter their background, as long as I can see an effort on your part."
The queen looked at her so hopefully, her eyes pleading. If she said yes, this fight would be over. That was all the two of them wanted in the moment. To not have to avoid each other. To not feel that anger that welled up inside them like a balloon that just wouldn't pop. To just be mother and daughter again. "Okay," Elsa said finally. "I'll give it a shot."
The two of them shared another hug, blissful relief making them both feel lighter than air. When they pulled away, Iduna was grinning. "Race you back to the palace." She already had her hands on the reins,
Elsa smirked. "Oh, you're on."
This story is also available on AO3. I also have a Twitter where I post behind the scenes content, polls, writing updates and more. Both are under the same username kalesalad003 and the links are in my bio!