Vince once asked me who I thought was better.

It didn't surprise me that he asked, I'm sure everyone's dying to know, even Dom and Jim.

You can always tell when people feel like asking. They try to put this blank look on their face to make it seem like everything's okay with them, but you can see in their eyes they're busting a gut not asking.

But Vince, being Vince, didn't think it was rude. He's always in trouble for not being able to shut up, but it also makes him pretty fucking honest. And he expects the same thing from the people he meets.

So when he got the guts to ask, I answered.

No one was. There wasn't anything there that I could compare. I loved them both, as a lover and as a friend, even if as people they were different.

I didn't choose one because I thought they were a better lover, or a better friend, or a million different things that people seem to judge others with.

I chose what I felt was right.

I could have lived with either of them and have been happy. I don't doubt that.

But I was a different person to either of them, and in the end I had to ask myself: who was it that I wanted to be?

Present

It was a little past two when Brian and I finally got home. Tired but happy, the two of us made our way to beds, glad at least that we didn't have to drag this thing with us anymore.

Brian told me that he didn't know how long he could have kept this from Mia, especially if he was looking to marrying her.

And to be honest, I'm done with how this came out. I don't know how I would have told Dom or the team. I don't think there was any way to make this sound better.

So I went to bed a little lighter, until I realized that I was supposed to meet with Jim in a few hours.

That kept me awake for another hour, wondering what might happen, what it was that he wanted to say.

So morning came extra early for me, starting with the sound of someone trying to break their car door before the sped off for work.

Work!

"Oh shit!" I yelled, scrambling off the bed.

I had exactly fifteen minutes to eat breakfast, take a shower, and head off to work.

Not that I really needed to worry. One of the advantages of going to work in a garage that you and your friends own is that you can pretty much take control of your own hours. So long as you put in the hours and get the work done, none of us really gave a shit on whether or not you were on time.

And we could do that, be late for work I mean, but I learned long ago from watching Tony that even if you were your own boss, you had to respect your job if you wanted your people to respect you.

Because of that, Dom, Vince, Mia and I developed a work ethic that Leon and Jesse seemed to pick up.

I'd already taken yesterday off, it wouldn't look too good if I came in late. Even if Brian told me they would understand, I couldn't really avoid them forever.

The house was already empty when I came up. The boys had already left for work and Mia's been up for hours before she came to school.

I took a quick shower before slowing down to dress up in mine and Dom's bedroom.

I sat on the bed for a few moments, just looking around. I'd only been sleeping in Jesse's room for a night and the room already feels different. This is the longest that Dom and I haven't been with each other and still be in the same house...and I miss him.

I stayed for a minute more before running down the stairs to grab a power breakfast, hoping that Mia left me enough leftovers from last nights dinner.

But soon as I entered the kitchen, I saw that she left me more than just last nights dinner, she made me a full spread.

I blinked and just stood there, not really believing that I could have all this food.

And it wasn't even my birthday.

"Wow" I breathed

"You can say that again."

I whirled around and saw Dom coming in, plastic bag in his hand.

"Enjoy it, Leon made it" he said "Says it's his way of apologizing"

My jaw must have dropped to the floor. "He didn't have to do that."

"He wanted to" Dom answered "Besides, it made Mia happy knowing that somebody else knows how to cook breakfast around here."

He put the bag down the counter and pulled out a chair.

"C'mon, eat. Nothing in there that'll kill you."

I sat down and watched as Dom pulled out a milk container from a bag, putting it in front of me.

"We ran out this morning and I know you don't like coffee so I thought...I thought I'd get you one."

Okay...

Eggs benedict, bacon, sausages, pancakes, a frigging bowl of sliced fruit and now Dom pouring me a glass of milk...

"You don't have to do that" I tell him, taking the carton and doing it myself "Why don't you, uh, go eat"

"I already ate" he said, but sat down in front of me anyway "Brian told me you came in pretty late, so I thought I'd let you sleep in."

"Oh" I mumble, stacking my plates high with pancakes and drenching it with syrup, fixing another plate with sausages and eggs

And it all looked surreal. Sitting here in our sun drenched kitchen, the room smelling like coffee, staring at pretty food while my boyfriend watches me eat.

But see, that doesn't fucking happen here. Not in this house. Nothing in this house is surreal, or slow for that matter. No one ever takes a break, least of all, Dom.

"Uh, I can't eat with you watching me Dom" I told him

He sort of snaps to and makes himself a bowl of fruit, giving me a rather sheepish smile to dull the awkward moment.

And what a fucking awkward moment it is. It's like one of those British sitcoms where they all stand there pretending that they don't see the bear standing in the middle of the living room.

And from what I can recall, the scene always ends when the fucking bear tries to eat them all...

Well, we have to start somewhere...I take a few bites then look at him, watching him pick with his food before taking a bite.

"You okay Dom?"

He stops for a moment and just shrugs.

"I don't really know Let" he answers "Depends on what you'd call okay, I guess"

Not really the best of answers, but at least he was being honest. And that's really what we need right now.

"Look, I know this sucks, but--"

"I just miss you Let" he cuts in "I just miss you."

I can almost say that time stopped as the wind is knocked right out of me.

One day, I'm going to have to ask Dom how he does that. Maybe it's something you're born with, but it couldn't hurt just knowing how the hell he comes up with these breath stopping statements.

"Dom, I..." I swallow thickly "Dom, I miss you too, but we both know that this wasn't going to be easy."

He sighs, and for the first time this morning I notice the tired look in his eyes.

"I know it's just...I didn't really get enough sleep" he says "Leon and V got into this stupid fight last night and Mia asked me to shut them up so she could study. Refereeing lasted most of the evening. That and the beds just too big without you and...I couldn't really sleep."

Wow. Two in a row, Dom. Two in a row.

"I couldn't really sleep either" I manage "Jesse's bed is too small, you know that? Must be why he always did it in the living room."

He let out a snort. "Jesus, that kid and his surprises."

"Remember that one time when you told him to get a room? And--"

"He moved to ours?" he finished "I don't think that kids ever done it without someone walking into them."

"Well, he could have tried the basement, but the bed's too small and floors just fucking too cold."

"Must be why Leon started bunking in with V" he said

"Coz V always goes down on some hoes bed" I finished for him

It was a pretty funny joke...until I thought of all those girls.

How many of them were really hoes...and how many of them really cared about V? Or even Leon, for that matter. Pretty ridiculous, but there are those that do, and I know that because some of them are my friends...

It kind of makes me wonder what'll happen once they get tired of it...I mean, it has to happen, right? One of these days, them two dawgs are going to have to grow up and move out and things will be different...

"What are you thinking?"

I looked up at Dom, surprised.

"You know, that's the first time you've ever asked me that."

Now he was the one surprised. He kind of leaned back, shaking his head with a cocky grin on his face.

"Nah...no way. C'mon, I always ask you what you're thinking"

"If it's about a car" I answered "If it's about some race, or what movie I wanna see. But never about how I feel."

This time, he was dumbfounded, because I never told Dom how I felt.

When things started getting bad, I just kept things to myself. I never really said anything, always just acted out, thinking he'd get the hint and figure things out himself.

"You used to ask me, before, when you got out of Lompoc. When we were just starting, you asked me that a lot."

"And you talked to me" he answered, simply. He fiddled with his hands a bit before moving forward, putting his elbows on the table, his head moving towards his clasped hands.

I didn't say anything. I thought he was praying, but he looked up and out the window, just thinking...remembering, I guess.

"We used to talk a lot" I told him "I still remember what it was like to be this kid who followed you around...and when you got out of Lompoc, and you stared asking me all these questions...it made me feel like I was special. Because you wanted to know how I felt. And you never cared to ask me that before, when I was a kid."

I pushed my plate away, suddenly losing my appetite.

"I knew you wanted me, and in the beginning I just couldn't figure out why. You could have any girl--"

He looked up then, this pained look on his face.

"Letty--" he started

"No, I know that." I said "I'm not the prettiest girl on the block, and you always...you always had pretty girls, ever since we were kids. Even when I was ten, I remember thinking 'if I could just be that pretty girl'...but I knew I just wasn't like that. And when you started talking to me... I thought maybe I could be. Be that pretty girl, be your girl"

I looked at him, wanting him to see that I was trying, that this was difficult for me too.

"Only, I had one up over them, because I knew you, the real you. Watched you grow up. Knew the things you liked. What made you hurt, what made you happy. They all wanted you because you were Dominic Torreto, this legend, the King of the Streets. They were all chasing after a myth...but I was after the real man. And I thought, if you could just see that--"

"And I did" Dom cut in "I knew from the start Letty, that you were the real thing."

Somehow, our hands found each other across the table. I watched as his big hand engulfed mine, felt his thumb lightly running through my knuckles.

This is it...this was what we lost...

"You were a kid when I left, but I knew then that you were someone special, that you'd always be in my life. I thought about you when I was in jail, how you were doing, what you were like. I wished you the best in there, because to me you were always my little sister, and I guess for along time I just thought of you as that."

"Then I came back home...and there you were, all grown up. And you talked to me...the way you always talked to me. Everyone else was treating me like I was either some sort of ex-convict or anti-hero, but you...you treated me like Dom. And I really needed that. I started to see you then, Letty"

His grip tightened, and my hands closed on his.

He was talking, and I was listening. And I was talking, and he was listening. About a past that we thought was just gone.

I don't remember a lot from when Dom came home, only that I felt relieved, liberated. Like I was the one who got out of jail and thought "finally, my life can go on."

"But it didn't take much long for me to fade" I answered "Was I just a new thing, Dom? Was that why you went back to screwing all those girls?"

He shook his head. "No...yes...I...I don't really know. I just...everyone else had moved on in their lives and I...I was still stuck in that nightmare. I guess I wanted things like the way they were before..."

"When you had everything" I said "Racer King. When you were on top of your game, owned every racer in every street, and could have any woman."

"But I just wanted you, Let. I always just wanted you" he finished

"You were right, you were never one of the pretty girls. You spoke your mind, you were always smart. You never took shit from nobody from the streets. You never hesitated in giving your opinion, you always kept things real and that to me made you beautiful..."

That made me smile.

This is the most honest conversation that we've had in a long time. It was taking a lot from the both of us, but hey. You get what you give, and with this much at stake, we're both willing to sacrifice a lot to make that risk.

And it's not Jesus, and it's not even frigging nine thirty.

"When we get home" he said "We're going to talk about this you not thinking your pretty bullshit."

His eyes were shining, so bright as they looked at me that I thought I was just luminous.

"Not pretty? Jesus woman, have you looked in the mirror? If I wasn't the King of the Streets, I'd have to get thrown back in Lompoc for beating guys off of ya"

I laughed at an image of Dom beating of my hapless "suitors".

"Seriously Let" he said "Later, when we get back from the races, we are going to start fixing this."

I winced as I remember my "appointment" for this evening.

"I can't go to the races tonight, Dom. Jim and I are going out...he wants to talk to me about something."

The light dimmed in his eyes and I can feel the tension creeping back in.

Welcome to reality Letty. Here's the door. Feel free to go whenever you feel like dreaming.

"What time are you leaving?"

"He said he'd call first, but he'll probably pick me up after work which is sometime around six."

I know he wants to say no, but he just nods. He's going to have to learn to trust me if this is going to work, and I'm going to have to learn how to trust him.

"Hey" I tell him "It's going to be okay. I'll be back."

His grip on my hand doesn't loosen, but I can feel the doubt pouring off of him...I know that, because I'm worried too.

Authors Notes: Yes, I do know how this is going to end. The final chapters are pretty much done, I just have to polish and post them. And don't worry Eli, I won't toss Jim out...Actually, I can't toss Jim out since the story is pretty much about, well, Jim and Letty. :D And though it's not like me to explain, there is a reason why our two leading men had to take a step back and let some secondary characters in...More Johnny Strong for one. That guy's hot!