A/N: While you're reading this keep in mind that while writing this, I was lacking sleep and therefore not in my right mind. Well, actually I think I've got a screw loose anyway but that's not the point. This incredibly stupid and I have no idea why I'm actually posting this.
The hall was filled with Elves, all of them singing and dancing. Frodo, Merry, Pippin, Sam, and Bilbo watched with glee as the fair inhabitants of Rivendale carried on with their merry making. Gandalf sat talking amiably with Lord Elrond while watching the Elves on the dance floor. Alas, while everyone else was happily dancing, singing, and eating, Aragorn and Arwen were not joining in.
They sat in a corner talking in very serious, hushed voices. None of the people who walked by noticed them.
"Arwen," Aragorn said desperately. "Please, you have to marry me."
Looking at the king-to-be Arwen turned her nose up. "And why is that?"
"Well…" he searched for the words. "I love you…?"
"If you can prove it, I'll believe it." Arwen crossed her arms over her chest and looks at him expectantly.
Aragorn bit his lip. There was only one way he knew how to prove his love to the Elven princess. Naturally it meant public humiliation. He sighed heavily before moving to the middle of the stage. Yes, the hall had a stage which magically appeared.
"Everyone," he called out loudly, trying to get everyone's attention. "Excuse me. Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to um… make an announcement." Every last person in the hall had stopped and turned their attention to Aragorn. "Right. Well, if you would all please return to your seats." Even as he said it, people started to move to their places at the many tables, grumbling all the way.
Once everyone had settled down and he once again had their attention, Aragorn looked to the band and nodded as the lights in the hall dimmed and the spotlight was put on him. "I'd like to dedicate this song to Arwen," Aragorn said, his eyes resting on her as he spoke.
The music started in a somewhat lively tune. Aragorn was tossed a top hat and a cane from some unseen person. Then to the immense amusement of everyone in the crowd, he began to sing and tap dance.
When I get older losing my hair,
Many years from now.
Will you still be sending me a Valentine
Birthday greetings bottle of wine.
If I'd been out till quarter to three
Would you lock the door,
Will you still need me, will you still feed me,
When I'm sixty-four
You'll be older too,
And if you say the word,
I could stay with you.
I could be handy, mending a fuse
When your lights have gone.
You can knit a sweater by the fireside
Sunday morning go for a ride,
Doing the garden, digging the weeds,
Who could ask for more.
Will you still need me, will you still feed me,
When I'm sixty-four
Surprisingly Aragorn was a pretty good tap dancer. He seemed to know exactly when he should use what moves and he knew all the words to the entire song.
Same leaned over to Frodo and asked, "Where did he learn to dance like that, Mr. Frodo?"
Arwen, who had been not too far away from the Hobbits had overheard and decided to answer. "He does this for me whenever we're together in private." Her eyes shone with admiration as she watched her future husband. "You should see him sing Body Language."
Every summer we can rent a cottage,
In the Isle of Wight, if it's not too dear
We shall scrimp and save
Grandchildren on your knee
Vera Chuck & Dave
Send me a postcard, drop me a line
Stating point of view
Indicate precisely what you mean to say
Yours sincerely, wasting away
Give me your answer, fill in a form
Mine for evermore
Will you still need me, will you still feed me.
When I'm sixty-four
The song ended and everyone was silent. Everyone was too shocked to be able to say or do anything. Then, once the shock wore off, the hall exploded with an applause. Some people even cheered for an encore.
Leaving the stage, Aragorn looked for Arwen but couldn't find her anywhere. Finally he came across the table where the Hobbits sat, eating like… well, like Hobbits.
"Have you see Arwen," he asked hopefully.
His little friends all grinned at him. Frodo was the one to answer. "She said she was going out to the garden."
With a smile and a quick thank you, Aragorn took off in the direction of the garden.
When the ranger had left Frodo turned to Merry and Pippin. "You two did get that on all on film, right?"
The two cousins gave Frodo matching mischievous grins. "You'll just have to wait for the bachelor party to find out," was the only answer Merry would give.