A/N: Well, I'm back, after a while. Yeah...uh. Here we all are. I hope you all like this edition. This story is a bit more...freaky, so if you don't like people hitting on others or anything like that, just go away.
Boromir: Aragorn
Frodo Gimli
Gandalf Pippin
Gimli Sam
Legolas Frodo
Merry Merry
Pippin Legolas
Sam Gandalf
Denethor Eowyn
Eomer Denethor
Eowyn Theoden
Theoden Eomer
Gollum Gollum
Saruman Grima Wormtongue
Grima Wormtongue Saruman
Chapter Two: The Edoras Bachelor Party.
In Edoras...
"So, Legolas, want to have a drinking Contest?" Theoden, who is playing Eomer, asks Pippin.
"Er, sure!" Pippin, playing Legolas, says.
"Cool! HEY! 'Nuther round over here!"
"Just to say, old man, you're going down!"
The bar person returns with 2 large tankards of ale.
"Bottoms up!"
Pippin and Theoden quickly attempt to down the 2 tankards.
"Hey! I want in!" Merry says. "I face winner!"
The two are quickly done, and they both finished in the same amount of time.
"'Nuther round, please!" Theoden says.
Soon, Merry is also joining in on the contest.
"Hey, dudes, watcha doin?" Eowyn asks.
"Drinking!" Merry says.
"Get me a round!" Eowyn says.
The bar person runs back with another round for the 4 of them.
"Aah, Rohirrim Ale!" everyone sighs.
"Hey, men, what're you doing?" Denethor walks over.
"Er, getting drunk."
"Count me in!"
So the bar person returns with a glass for Denethor.
"Hey, dudes!" Frodo and Sam say.
"Hello!"
"What's going on?"
"We're getting drunk."
"Hey, fellow men!" Boromir and Gandalf says.
"Get us all a round, ok?"
So Gandalf, Boromir, Frodo, and Sam sit down with Merry, Pippin, Theoden, Eowyn, and Denethor and precede to get drunk...
"/Hic/ that was /Hic/ good!"
"Hey, let's /hic/ just go find the /hic/ storage barrels and /hic/ hijack them."Denethor says
"/Hic/ ok!"
So the already drunk people stagger out to the ale-storage barrels in the back."
"Ooh, so ale-y!" Pippin says.
So all the people kind of, well, just, like...get..drunker than they are...and with that some weird things happen...
"Did I ever tell you about the time /Hic/ me an' Faramir went to some /hic/ nightclub in Minas Tirith and kind of, /hic/, er, met some people?" Boromir says.
"Nah, ye sure didn't!" Frodo says, swaying.
"Hey, there, sexy, who might you be?" Denethor asks Eowyn.
"Hey, hottie, I'm Eowyn...I mean Theoden...I mean Eowyn..."
"I'm Eowyn...I mean Denethor... Wanna stop by my /hic/ house?"
"Why wait? /HIC!/" Eowyn says.
"Er..."
"Hey, whass goin' on wit the old guy?"
"Is that Eowyn?"
"Oooh, naughty naughty people!" Pippin says, looking at Denethor and Eowyn, who have started Making-out (EEEEEWWW!)
"What?" Denethor says.
"Eew, isn't he pretending to be Eowyn and she's Eowyn?"
"Eeew, that's disturbing..." Merry says, puking.
"Dude..."
"Can they kind of...stop...I mean, I have a sensitive stomach..."
"Ok, people, let's stop before some stuff happens we don't want to see /hic hic hic hic hic!/" Gandalf says.
"Ok, Denethor, let's let the poor shieldmaiden go..."
"But she hit on me first!"
"Oh, sure, that's why you called her sexy."
"Hey, it's not my fault that I'm a stud muffin!" Denethor protests.
"Did you ever noticed we're all a bit disturbed??"
"Why has everyone stopped talking like drunks?"
"Good question, Pippin!"
"Hey..."
So now that everyone has stopped getting/talking like drunks...
"So...what's happening?"
"Hmm...where's that Palantir? I have a strange desire to just take it and hold it."
"Well, Sam's keeping it well-gaurded. I mean Sam-dalf."
"SAMDALF! That's funny! Let's all start calling him that!"
"Ok.." so everyone marches inside to bother Samdalf.
"Hey!"
"SSSSH!!! People are SLEEPING!" says Angry Rohan Dude 1.
"Sor-RY!"
So they all kind of just pull up sleeping bags and sleep..
"Hmm..now'd be a good time..." Gandalf says, crawling over towards Samdalf (Sam).
"Pippin! I mean, Gandalf!" Merry says.
"What?"
Meanwhile, outside Edoras...
"Something evil lurks here, I think. A shadow in the east or something, a sleepless malice. Is Sauron an insomniac?" Pippin (Lego-pip, remember?) says.
"Hmm. Dunno, Pip. I mean, maybe. And what are you talking about, evil being here? Unless you mean Gandalf. He's a bit off his rocker." Boromir muses. "And perhaps Sauron is an insomniac. If I ever see him, I'll ask."
"You'd do that for me? Little old adorable hobbit-y elfish me?" Pippin says.
"Well, I mean, maybe..." Boromir says.
"Hey! He's here!" Pippin screams, running into the hall, a confused Boromir following him.
Gandalf has been looking at the palantir, and has finally gotten hold of it and has started to look into it, which is pretty bad.
"Gandalf Pippin! Put it BACK!" Merry says, but it is too late.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Gandalf screams, writhing on the floor in pain.
"Pippin! Gandalf! Someone help!" Merry screams, as Boromir and Pippin run in. Samdalf (Sam) wakes up at that moment.
"Fool of a Tookish Wizard!"
Boromir runs in and tries to pry the palantir from Gandalf's hands, but it's no use and he just faints from over exposure to something so evil. Pippin catches him but ends up being dragged down by Boromir.
Finally the palantir rolls away and everyone is fine...except Gandalf.
"Gandalf! Wake up, man! GANDALF!"
"Maybe we should leave him that way.."
"Help him, Samdalf!"
"What's with this Samdalf business?"
"Dunno..."
So Sam helps Gandalf wake up, which is a bit weird. Gandalf recovers, and says...
"Boromir, your homeland is under attack! Talk about dry tinder, that freakin white tree is being burned to the ground, along with the city! AND THE EYE WAS THERE!!"
All this just causes Boromir to faint.
A/N: Check back soon for Legolas and Gimli and other parts of the movie!