A/N: My first L.J. Smith fanfic so all thoughts would be truly, madly appreciated.
Yesterdays
Rated PG-13
Chapter 9
Sibyl walked into the hotel room and gave a sigh of relief. She'd let herself be tailed back, not wanting to give Thorne any reason to be suspicious by shaking it off. She was going to be as non-suspect as possible until she left L.A. scrolls in hand.
"It's the Girl-Who-Lived! How'd it go with You-Know-How?" Her partner was sitting in front of the television, watching one of her ridiculous soap operas.
Sibyl shook her head as she pondered the question. How had it gone? Not as planned, not as expected and yet somehow still alright. They'd made a date for tonight, on his suggestion, giving her opportunity to complete her mission. But when opportunity meant time spent with Thorne, well, that certainly banished any desire to rejoice.
"Ask me that after tonight's date. Assuming I'm still alive," she added melodramatically.
Phoena let out a whoop, focusing on the date issue rather than Sibyl's possible death. "I knew you could do it."
"I haven't done anything yet," Sibyl pointed out.
"You got him to agree to spend time with you. That's the first step."
Sibyl acquiesced with a slight nod. This morning, unpleasant and difficult as it was, had ended in her favor. In Circle Daybreak's favor. The first step was accomplished. But, oh, so many more were left. And should one of those go in the wrong direction, there would be no second chances.
Phoena's voice broke into her maudlin thoughts. ". . . wear tonight?"
"What was that?"
Impatience and annoyance flashed across the shifter's face. "I asked what you're going to wear tonight."
Sibyl gave a shrug. What kind of question was that anyway? She had other, more important things to worry about than her attire. Like the fact that the other half of her soul was a black and shriveled mass hiding behind a beautifully chiseled façade.
But Phoena didn't understand or didn't care for she kept harping away until Sybil agreed to a shopping trip.
It was something to keep her occupied, to keep her from brooding about the impending date. Trying to keep up with Phoena in a mall was better than any exercise in the gym. She was dragged from store to store forced to try on dress after skirt after shoes until she was ready to hail Phoena queen of the universe in exchange for a little respite.
And she was a trained Daybreak agent, supposedly immune to torture. The witch shuddered to think what going shopping with Phoena could do to a regular human. It could be lethal!
As Sybil mechanically went through the motions of readying herself for her date she tried to cheer herself with the thought that it was over and the real torture would not begin for another half hour. She wasn't much cheered.
Her hand slowly, steadily applied eyeliner while her mind whirled at a faster pace. She thought of the man she loved. The man she lost. The man she loathed. How unlucky for her that he was one and the same with the man she'd see tonight.
And that was the kind of thinking that made her life a mess. Because Thorne knew it. He was too intuitive, too smart not to realize that she considered him her personal demon, her punishment for some heinous crime committed in another world. She doubted that he even needed the soulmate link to tell him that every minute spent with him was pure agony. Just as she didn't need the soulmate link to tell her that he relished in it. Perhaps that was the true reason for tonight's date. Not a new beginning at all but a chance to needle her with reminders of the past. As though that was even necessary. As though her life hadn't been forever stained by his careless cruelty. As though every moment of every day, no matter how glorious, wasn't shadowed by her remembrance.
And how unfair was that to Owen? Yes, she loved him. How could she not? He had saved her life countless times. People thought saving a life was something dramatic, and the time he rescued her from Hunter certainly was. But there were other things, less dangerous, perhaps but equally precious, and equally vital. A hug when she was cranky, a soothing voice to pull her out of nightmares, a person who cared just because. Owen had given her that. He'd been the one who caught her when she fell, or more accurately when Thorne gave her that shove. Her anchor when the world had gone adrift. Yes, she loved him for that. Always would. But even he couldn't replace the gaping whole in her heart. And she knew there was nothing he could do that would leave equal mark. She didn't love him that much.
How could she give Owen all her heart when most of it had already been taken (shredded, and destroyed, yes, but first taken) by his cousin? She had thought she loved Owen enough for it to work, but seeing Thorne again made her realize that she only had crumbs of herself left to give. She cared about Owen too much to want that for him. He needed someone who could love him the way he deserved.
He needed
And she started to think a soulmate, but her mind balked as memories stirred. She wouldn't wish that on anyone. He just needed more. More than she could ever give anyone.
When this assignment was over, (with the large and not necessarily likely assumption that she was still alive) she would leave Daybreak to while away the rest of her life on some secluded beach somewhere.
She would loll about on the sand, sunbathe and swim, drink pretty drinks with little umbrellas in them, flirt with hot guys. Five minutes later, as Sybil was fantasizing about the number of sarongs she would have, a knock on the door brought her abruptly (and rather lamentably) back to the present.
And it was showtime.
A/N: If anyone's made it this far, I'd love to know what you think. Please take a couple seconds to review. Thanks!!