A/N- Well here is chapter 4. I love all of those who read my story, and I love those even more who gave me reviews. You guys are awesome. I will try to get another chapter up soon. But enough of my endless chatter, here you go.

Jack was sitting in his cave, watching the rain drench the land before him. He could almost pretend that he was sitting in a movie theatre, watching a movie; the walls of the cave were the edges of the screen and Tom Cruise or Julia Roberts were just about to walk right in front of him. How he wished it was a movie he was watching and not real life. Sure his life back home wasn't the greatest, but it sure beat the here and now.

He couldn't believe Kate had kissed that slime of a human being. How could she do that to me? After all the flirting and the looks she sent his way, she went and did that. Sure she did it for a good reason. To get what they needed without having to hurt him was a good idea, but why did it have to be her? Why did she have to kiss him back? Why did I have to ask her about it? He really didn't want to know the answer, so why did he ask the question? And why on earth, did she have to tell him the truth? He would have believed her if she had said no, and someone like her must be used to lying to people, so why did she tell him the truth?

It wasn't really fair to stereotype her like that. He didn't know what she had done to be on the wrong side of the law. It might not have been anything bad, maybe just a little mistake she made long ago, but he had no way of knowing. As she had so delicately put it, he had had the chance to know and he didn't take it. He only had himself to blame. But as he thought about it, as much as he wanted to know about her past, about the reasons behind the things she did, he didn't want to know what she had done. He didn't want to look at her and see only what she had done. He wanted to be able to know her for who he saw her to be. But people are never who they seem to be. He was the perfect example of that. She would be surprised to find out what kind of man he actually was. But something about her, about this place, that made him want to change that.

She was the one person on this island who he felt was as strong as he was, maybe even stronger. Sure Sayid was smart and strong, so was Locke, but it seemed that they still always asked Jack first before they did anything. Everyone looked to him for direction, to be told what to do. Not Kate. She was the one person who would do things her own way and if she didn't like what was going down she would tell him. He was just lucky that most of the time, her way was often the same way as his. There was the hardly a time when they disagreed on anything, until it came to the caves. After she decided to stay on the beach, it seemed like they disagreed on almost everything.

Why did she have to kiss Sawyer? Sawyer. The man was most definitely Jacks opposite. The only thing they had in common was Kate, but that was all. They probably even felt differently about Kate. Sawyer most likely just saw Kate as a piece of meat, or something he could play around with when he felt like it. That was not how Jack felt at all. He loved her. He loved her for the way she made him feel, for the way she let him lean on her while everyone was leaning on him. He loved the way she would look at him or flirt with him, but for some reason, he couldn't seem to reciprocate his feelings.

He hated how she was always on his mind, the way she crept into his dreams when he finally found some time to rest, or the way he always got distracted thinking about her eyes or her smile or the sound of her voice when he was trying to do something else. And he hated that even after she had kissed Sawyer, and broken his heart, he was still sitting here thinking about her. He hated this island but he loved it at the same time, because without it, he might never have been given the chance to meet her. But most of all, he hated what he had said to her. He hadn't meant it, he was mad and hurt, and so he hurt her too. He'd never forgive himself for that.

He was stuck on an island with no hope of rescue, with people looking to him for everything, and people like Sawyer, Locke and Sayid. The one thing that had made it better was her, and he had pushed her away. If he wanted to survive or be of any use to anyone, he needed her. He had to make things right. He would make it right, because unlike his father, he cared about her opinion.

His father was a difficult man to be around, let alone to have as a father. All his life, Jack had to listen to his father tell him over and over, that he would never amount to anything. That he would never be able to help anyone, so he shouldn't even bother trying. So naturally, Jack had gone into medicine. He wanted to prove to his father that he could help people, that he could be as good a man as his father. Jack saw how everyone was around his father. As a boy and even as a teenager, he thought that everyone treated his father with respect and admiration, but as he got older, he realized that everyone treated his father as he did. With fear.

Jack also realized now, that perhaps everything his father said to him was just his way of trying to get Jack to try harder, to be better. It had worked, at least to everyone else. Jack grew up to be one of the most respected spinal surgeons in NY, and the kind of guy the other doctors would want to take to their high scale country clubs and set up their daughters with. He was even married to a wealthy woman, from a high class family. All this was still not enough for his father. He was still nothing and would never amount to anything.

But at night, Jack became even more like his father. He would get drunk, sometimes get high, and screw any girl he could. There were even times that, in a drunken rage, he had hit his wife. Looking back now, Jack was glad that they never had any kids like Emily, his wife, had wanted. 'Cause if they had had kids, he might have treated them like his father had treated him.

This went on for two years before the day that everything changed. It was the day that Jack finally saw what he had become, and hated everything about himself. It was the day that Jack decided not to let his father scare or push him around any more. It was the first time, since that day when he was kid, that he took a stance for what he believed in. And it had felt good. That day, he changed everything about his life that he didn't like. He ruffled a lot of feathers when he did, but he didn't care. He was finally happy and he wasn't about to let anyone bring him down.

Yet still, to this day, even though his father is dead and gone, the words he spoke so long ago are continually repeated, over and over in Jack's head. That's why he tried harder than ever to be the perfect savior, doctor, hero, or whatever name they came up with, on the island. He couldn't believe that he was still trying to prove his father wrong. He wasn't here, he was gone, and he had nothing left to prove.

He had proved his father right on one thing though. Kate. He had messed up bad with her. He could tell she wanted to explain, and he could tell that he had hurt her when he had yelled at her. It was his own fault she was off kissing some other guy. He was so wrapped up in trying to prove his father wrong about him being a good doctor, that he didn't take the time to be a person. He couldn't see what she was trying to show him. He couldn't blame her, or even Sawyer, no matter how much he wanted to. It was his fault that his heart was in pieces. But he would make it right.

No one knows what it's like
To feel these feelings
Like I do
And I blame you

So there is the end of this chapter, I hope it stood up to your expectations. Like I said at the begining, I will try to give you another chapter soon.