Hi, everyone! I'm sorry (again) if this takes some time, but there are always all those stupid everyday things to attend to that make it possible to afford the luxury of a computer, among other things.
Thanks for all the reviews. Here are few comments:
HexWa - obvious, isn't it?
Unreet - yes, I was somewhat disappointed at OoP, too. I'm still working out how to get her to Hogwarts.
Paradox - Funny, really. I'm a 200% H/H shipper, too, as far as canon is concerned, so I'll readily join you running around with that banner of yours. Only, in this story it's not possible, as it's going to be H/F. Anything else would have no point at all. You'll have noticed that I've made Fleur as young as she can possibly be, and after all, Harry is a special guy, so why not? That's why I say it's going to be more and more A/U, too.
WickerB - yes, Dobby is great, I'll try to get him into the next chapter.
Molassesturtle - sorry, we won't find out quite yet.
Blazinangelwings - glad you like little Gabie, she's not easy to write, I can tell you. And, yes, of course it has.
Warbl - yes, everybody goes H/H or H/G, it's kinda boring. But I do hope it's not a GOOF story ;)
Panuru - of course it's inevitable, but I do my best to contradict canon as little as I can.
Sorrow - yes, Fleur on her own back in France wouldn't be worth writing. I'm just trying to work out how to get her back to Hogwarts.
Pantherocker - right, there are only a handful good H/F stories around, so I'm trying my humble best to add one.
All this said (hope you're not half asleep by now) let the story begin. There's not much action here, but I hope you'll enjoy it nevertheless as it will explain a lot of things.
Chapter 21 ResearchFeb. 27th, 1995
It's Saturday, and this means no lessons. I was a bit worried about Gabie, I really want to spend as much time with her as I possibly can, but on the other hand, I really want to know what happened to the Veela charm. Fortunately, Iphigenie and Margaux have offered to spend the morning with her, so I'll be free to start on my research.
+++
I met with Hermione in the Hogwarts library after breakfast.
"Hi," she said with a – very slight – smile.
"Bon jour," I replied, perhaps a bit stiffly. She had been looking daggers at me most of the past months, after all.
She couldn't but notice, and said, "Come on, I know I haven't been too friendly recently," – the understatement of the century! "– But I was afraid – "
She stopped herself, and blushed.
"What?" I asked innocently. I suspected it had something to do with Ron and the way he used to react to the Veela charm, but I wasn't going to tell her that.
"Oh, forget it," she said briskly. "I suppose we can just as well try to become friends." Her smile was more open now, and she extended her hand, which I took happily enough.
+++
There are quite lot of books about Veela, their habits, their culture, and their powers in the Hogwarts library. But they are almost exclusively about pureblood Veela, and don't have anything about people like me who are only quarter.
"It's a strange feeling," I said to Hermione some time after the tenth or twelfth book. "I mean, normally you do this research for academic reasons, and now it's something that affects me personally, and nobody else-"
"Not quite," she interrupted with a dry grin. "The thing we're looking for does affect quite a lot of other people."
"Touché," I returned her smile. "But still, the way it used to affect them in turn affected me."
"Let's have a break," she said, pushing the heavy tome in front of her away. "Care for a walk in the grounds?"
"Yes, why not? A breath of fresh air will do us good after all these dusty old books."
She went back to the Gryffindor tower to fetch her cloak, while I waited for her in the great hall. Some students walked past, and I was satisfied to note that there was no sign of the Veela charm returning.
Presently Hermione returned and we went outside. The air was fresh and cold, but the warm sunshine was quite comfortable.
"Tell me about the Veela," Hermione said. "I know, of course, that they are wood spirits and originally come from eastern Europe, something like fairies… but that's more or less it, indeed I hadn't even heard of them before the Quidditch World Cup."
"World Cup? They were not playing, were they?"
"Of course not!" She looked at me as if I was out of my mind. "They acted as cheerleaders, as the Muggles would say. You know, dancing and singing, and generally looking gorgeous to heat up the atmosphere…"
"Yes, it's one of the legal uses of the Charm. There are only a few these days…"
"They say it can be switched on and off at will. Ron said you did it on Cedric…"
"What utter nonsense!" I burst out angrily. He really is Ron the Moron to me! "Only full-blooded Veela can do that. Just as they have the power to transform into birds. They are natural animagi. Unfortunately for me, this is not true for half- or quarter-bloods. That Charm, if you can call it that, seeing as I have no control over it, turned up rather abruptly when I was fourteen. It's something to do with my hair, too, I can't even cut it. And, of course, I can't transform."
"This Veela Charm, can you tell me more about it? What does it do?"
"Well, you'll have seen the main effect for yourself at the World Cup."
"Yes, every male person around started behaving in the stupidest ways, bragging all over the place, trying to do idiotic things to show off…"
"And Harry?" I couldn't resist asking. "Did he behave like the rest?"
"In the beginning, he did," she answered, grinning at the memory. "Wanted to jump down from the top box, or something… But when I shouted at him, he came to his senses all right. Unlike some others," she finished darkly. (I believe she was talking about Ron.)
"That's the most harmless form of the Charm, you know. It's not directed at a particular person, but spread out over a large number of people. If a Veela – a full-blood Veela, that is -deliberately directs her Charm at one person only, she can make them do whatever she wants. It's one of the most powerful Charms, or perhaps Curses, some say it's equally strong as Imperius, even. Obviously, I can do nothing of the sort, whatever people may think."
"You say person, does that mean the Charm can also be used on females?"
"That's right, but only if the target leans that way."
"How come that there are mixed – marriages, I suppose I'll have to say – among Veela and Humans? There must be, of course…"
"Or freaks like me wouldn't exist?" I remarked bitterly. "That's what you mean, don't you? Well, believe it or not, even Veela are capable of real love. Of course it's much harder for them to find a partner that loves them for who they really are; usually, they marry among themselves – yes, there are male veela, too - but time and again there are humans who are immune to the Charm, and then, very rarely, such a pair will get together. This is what happened to my grandmother."
"I never thought-" to Hermione's credit I must say she looked taken aback, "I mean, there are loads of awful stories how all those boys fall in love with a cruel Veela and pine away for the rest of their lives after one fateful kiss…"
"Ah, that kiss!" I said heatedly. "In all these clever stories of yours, does it ever say anything about the other side? How the Veela herself feels? Do you know about the strong magic that's connected with that kiss?"
"I just assumed it had that devastating effect on the human, you know, like some incurable addiction…"
"Quite right. Only not so easy. I believe you think of it as an absolutely one-sided thing. Like the big bad Veela sneaking up on the poor boy with the sole aim of making him a miserable wreck for the rest of his life. Trust me, it's not like that at all. The important thing is who starts it, who is kissing who first."
"I don't get it. A kiss is a kiss."
"For humans. With Veela it's very different. It's true that the Veela kiss forms a life-long bond, whether you like it or not. But it only binds the one that initiates the kiss. See? It's the very first kiss that's important. So if the guy, in the usual male manner, stupid and without thinking, just giving in to his hormones, is the one to kiss the Veela, then it will be him who is bound to her for the rest of his life. She, on the other hand…"
"Will probably be less than amused by the whole thing," Hermione said, catching on at last. "And who can blame her if she turns him away? Yes, I see it now…"
"I've always looked at it as some sort of justice," I told her. "Just imagine how awful it would be if it was the other way round! It shows that there is still something like free will, even where magic is concerned."
"And your grandmother? How did it work with her?"
"Ah, she's often told me about it! They met at the World Exhibition in Paris, in 1874. He was a young scientist, a muggle, by the way, not even a wizard; she says she was drawn to him at first sight. And just out of curiosity, she turned her Charm on him. She says she wanted to test him. Imagine her amazement when he turned out to be completely immune to it! Well, that was it, as far as she was concerned. They got married three months later."
"And their first kiss?"
"She says she can't say who started it. It seems they did simultaneously, and met halfway, so to speak."
"And did they live happily ever after?"
"They did, as far as grand-mere told me. Of course, being a muggle, he died at the age of 87, but she still remembers him fondly. So, well, that's what you ought to know about the Veela Charm, the original one, that is. But it still hasn't got us anywhere near my own case."
"I'm sure we will. And I am really sorry for all the awful things I've been thinking - and saying - about you. I think I understand what you must have felt like all these years. Let's be friends!" And she opened her arms, inviting me to embrace her, which I gladly did.
+++
In the afternoon, I took Gabie for a ride round the castle on my broom, which she liked a lot. There was no sigh of Harry, though, and she was disappointed. To say nothing about me! I have had quite an empty feeling all day, though I keep telling myself not to be stupid.
Feb. 28th, 1995
After a long luxurious sleep, I took Gabie for a tour to the village. Margaux and Iphigenie came with us. Of course, most shops are closed on a Sunday, but the sweet shop and the pubs, as well as the cafe (they call it a tea shop here) were open. We didn't feel like taking her into a pub, so we ended up in the teashop.
The place is a horrible accumulation of velvet and silky frills in colours usually associated with the stickier kind of sweets, but Gabie loved it. I really must work on her taste. We had some buns, which were reasonably ok, and some coffee, which was a mistake. I should have known! "English" and "Coffee" are two ideas that just don't go together. It being morning, and obviously not a Hogsmeade weekend for the Hogwarts students, the place was more or less empty, and we soon returned to the carriage for lunch.
+++
In the afternoon, I left Gabie in the company of Grisabel, and returned to the library to continue my research.
Hermione was already there. I begin to wonder whether she actually sleeps in the library, too. After glancing through two or three books, she suddenly looked up.
"Come here," she told me. "I believe I've finally found something."
It was not much of a book, compared to the heavy volumes we had been heaving about, it could scarcely be more than a hundred pages, and its cover was simple blue canvas. Human crossbreeding with magical species the gold title said.
"Yes, this does seem more like it," I agreed. I opened the book, and looked at the table of contents:
"Giants," I read out, "trolls" ("Ugh!" went Hermione.) "banshees - fairies - veela! Yes! At last!"
I took the book and settled down in a chair, but then I stood up again.
"Do you mind very much if I check this book out with me? I'd prefer reading it by myself. I'll tell you what it says later on. Ok?"
She looked as if she was going to object, but then she just nodded. "I understand that," she said, "just go ahead, but tell me at dinner if you have found something interesting."
So I took the book and went back to the carriage.
Gabie was already tired of playing with Grisabel, and didn't want to let me read in peace. I was at a loss for a moment, but then I had an idea.
"Wait a moment," I told her, and started rummaging among my things until I found the model of "my" dragon of the first task.
"Look," I said, "Why don't you play with this? I'm sure you know a few spells already to make it do things."
With a squeal of delight she took the dragon and busied herself with it on the sofa, while I could finally have a look at my book.
The book has a lot of stuff that is not new to me, but at last I reached the important part, and I must say it has done nothing to ease my mind, though it explains a lot of things. I'll sum up the most important parts here, although I doubt I'll forget them in a hurry:
In muggle and wizard history, half-Veela appear again and again, according to the book, such famous people as Morgaine and Delila, Cleopatra and Madame Pompadour were half-Veela. (I'm not sure if I should really believe this, but it doesn't make much of a difference, anyway.) It seems the author of this book is not one to appreciate women when they are strong-willed and independent, so I think I'd better read this with caution. Anyway, while half-Veela are not uncommon, it seems quarter-Veela like myself are much rarer. Apparently, most half-Veela remain childless. (The author suspects they are too selfish and preoccupied with their own career to bother having children, but I believe this is mostly due to his prejudice.) Therefore, he doesn't say much about quarter-breeds, and I have to be content with the facts about half-breeds and try to guess what may be different for me.
Well, according to this book, the original Veela Charm gets kind of diluted in half-breeds. It does not work in the Imperius-like way any more, but it is still possible to direct it at a single person on purpose. At the same time, what I like to call the "general" Charm, which affects everybody up to a certain distance in a diffuse way, is harder to control for the half-Veela. Also, although they can learn to be animagi, their natural ability to transform into birds is lost.
If I extrapolate this to my own case, it fits in well with my experience. While I've never possessed the REAL Veela Charm to switch on and of at will, the annoying diffuse version has always been present, and I've never had any control over it, just as the book leads to expect. So far so good, and nothing really new.
What follows is more disturbing, though again quite logical. It says that while for the full Veela, for the first kiss to have that fateful effect, it needs to be given with full erotic passion and intent, for the half-breed a feeling of friendly affection may already be enough. Now, again, extrapolated, this might mean that my grateful kiss could already have had that effect on me. The book doesn't really state it clearly enough, so maybe I'm wrong and it's not as bad as all that. Hold on, it's not "bad"! It's... oh, I don't know what it is! But it would explain the way I've been feeling ever since...
+++
After dinner I told Hermione what I had read. I had been toying with the idea not to tell her everything, but she's smart enough to notice if I keep something from her, and I'm absolutely sure she's going to read that book front to cover anyway, as soon as I return it to the library. I just told her what the book itself says, though, and kept quiet about my own ideas.
It was no use, of course.
"That would mean you and Harry-" she stopped, her eyes wide.
"It seems so, doesn't it?"
To my surprise, a huge grin appeared on her face.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Oh, nothing, really," she said, blushing profusely.
"What?" I insisted. "I thought we're supposed to be friends?"
"Well," she muttered awkwardly, "you see... Ron and I... and then there's Harry..." I had never seen cool and self-assured Hermione Granger like this. "I mean, he would feel left out... But now..." again she stopped, looking at me almost pleadingly.
"And now he just needs to get hooked up with me, and everything will be all right for you and Ron."
She looked hurt.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like this. Actually, it does you credit. But how do you know it will ever work out? True, I feel very much attracted to him, it would be absurd to deny it, and to tell you the truth, this has not even anything to do with me kissing him... But do you even know what he thinks about me? He's immune to the Veela Charm, remember? For all we know, he might be madly in love with YOU."
She paled visibly.
"Do you think so? But that would be awful! I'd so hate to hurt him in any way... He's got so much on his plate as it is. What with Dark Lords and dementors..." she trailed off, her eyes glistening.
"I understand. I'll tell you what you can do, for yourself, and for Harry, and for me: You are together with him most of the time (and I don't mind admitting I sometimes feel jealous), so why don't you try to sound him out - on his ideas about ME, of course," I added as she seemed about to protest, "I'm being quite selfish here, and then tell me what he said? I realise he might never see more in me than a chance acquaintance, but I want to know."
""He'd be mad-" she started, but checked herself. "How stupid of me, he'd just be going for your looks again, it would be like the Veela charm thing, only worse... Yes, I'll see what I can find out.
"And nobody is better at researching than Hermione Granger," I told her, at which she blushed again.