CHAPTER FOUR

Lindsey woke up, his body feeling heavy, sated and down right good. He looked at the woman he was spooned around, the stump of his arm tucked between her warm breasts. He kissed her shoulder, brushing aside her dark hair. He didn't remember Saeth arriving last night. They must have really been celebrating with the Kristal he had bought for her visit. His memory was totally fogged.

His lover woke, shifting in his arms. She turned her face up, smiling at him. Her eyes widened as his jaw dropped. Lilah stared at him for a moment then they both were in motion.

"Oh fuck!" he cried, swinging out of bed.

"Don't bring that up. What did you do?" Lilah got out of bed.

Lindsey couldn't help but look at her lean, supple body. He had never noticed that she was incredibly hot before. "I didn't do anything. What do you remember?"

Lilah's brow creased. "The bar...the guys who wanted the medicine shield."

Lindsey nodded. "They did something to us."

"Great. Their idea of funny was to stick me with stumpy. I'm going to do something and it's not going to be nice," Lilah growled, heading for her clothing. She tripped over something. Bending down, she picked up a narrow leather paddle done in gold with an arrow-shaped head. "An Aztec tawse. You know, I have a distinct memory of using this on you and you liked it, you kinky little bastard."

Lindsey lunged across the bed. "Give me that."

Lilah danced back, twirling the paddle like a baton. "In full possession of my faculties, I'm not sure I'm up for another round, even though spanking you is tempting." She tossed the paddle on the bed then grinned. "At least not all of you is small."

Growling, his face burning, Lindsey rolled back out of bed and pulled on his boxers. "Bitch."

"I'm pretty sure that's not what you were calling me last night." Lilah pulled on her underpants and bra. She squatted down by the garbage can in the master bath. "There'd better be condom wrappers in here."

"Please let there be condom wrappers," he mumbled under his breath. "Where's my hand?"

"Probably used as a sex toy. Check the sheets."

He glared at her. "Not funny, Lilah."

"Yeah, neither's the lack of condom wrappers."

"Shit. Got any RUD40?" Lindsey pulled on his pants.

"I can get some." Lilah came back out and found the rest of her clothes.

Lindsey wanted a shower but she'd probably find that amusing somehow. Worse she might want to join him.

"You know what the worst part of this is?" she asked.

He groaned. "There's a good part?"

"It was actually good sex." Lilah shot him a look that said how dare he be good in bed.

Lindsey curled his lip, hating to admit she had a point. Now that his memory was trickling in, the sex had been very good. He wanted his memory gone again. The phone rang, saving him from having to answer. He hurried out to answer, desperate for rescue. "Hello...Linwood? I'm not on duty...oh...yes, we did but it was a spell...but it really was a spell, we didn't want to...yes, I understand...I'll tell her." Lindsey slammed the phone down.

Lilah leaned on the door frame. "Let me guess, the Senior Partners know we broke the no fraternization rule."

"Yes, and how they might know that makes me shudder." Lindsey cringed.

Lilah's eyes looked nervous. "How bad's the damage?"

"We've both been sanctioned. The fine is ten thousand a piece." Lindsey looked rather relieved that's all the worse it was.

Lilah shrugged. "At least it wasn't a body part."

"No kidding. You leaving?" He tried not to sound too hopeful. She might stay just to spite him.

"Can't imagine why I'd stay." Lilah headed for the door then stopped. She picked up his arm. "We must have been in some hell of a hurry last night."

He took it from her, wincing as he tried to put the prosthesis on.

"It hurts, doesn't it?" Lilah's voice carried a touch of compassion, a hint that she was a human being with feelings under her pretty armor.

"Like you wouldn't believe." Lindsey strapped it on as someone knocked on the door.

"If that's your friends, I'd suggest shoving that hand somewhere it'll never see sunlight," Lilah said.

"I'm way ahead of you." Grimly, Lindsey opened the door.

A man boldly stepped in with an electronic clipboard in hand. Two people behind him wheeled in a coffin. "Shelton, Raoux, and Buckhalter funeral services. Here's the coffin you ordered. Sign here, please."

"Lindsey, you little pervert." Lilah came over and patted his cheek. "I'm so glad this didn't arrive yesterday.

"I didn't order a coffin," Lindsey moaned, knowing who was responsible for this. "Get it out of here."

"Here's the order form, sir. Already paid for." The man showed Lindsey his address on the electronic clip board.

"I didn't order any damn coffin. Take it back," Lindsey said as Lilah sauntered off down the hallway.

"Sorry, sir, we have our orders. We could get sued if we don't make our deliveries," the man said, still chipper as his men set the coffin on the living room floor.

"I'm a lawyer and I'm telling you I will sue if you don't get this coffin out of here," Lindsey snarled.

The man handed him a business card. "Ask for Mr. Irwin, the office manager. He'll take care of any of your concerns."

The funerary men were out of the door and down the hall in record time, probably on their way to a pick up, Lindsey thought miserably. He looked at the mahogany casket with brass fittings. "You had best be empty."

He struggled to open the smaller portion that would cover the head. It was empty, lined with pristine white satin. He put in a call to Irwin and got voice mail. He left a suitably threatening message then went for his shower. He stayed for the better part of an hour steaming and scrubbing until his skin was pink and there wasn't a hint of Lilah left on his flesh.

The funeral home hadn't called back. He figured they wouldn't until he gave up the medicine shield, which he wasn't going to do. On a sudden impulse, he went to the neighbors. Their door was now plastered in their own band memorabilia. He ignored the blatant violation of the codes and knocked. One of the skin heads answered.

"What?" He pulled the cigarette away from his cracked lips and blew smoke at Lindsey.

"Did you by any chance order a coffin?" Lindsey thought the man looked drugged but he brightened at the mention of the casket.

"Yeah."

"Well, it's in my place. Would you please come get it?" Lindsey said, tersely.

The man shrugged. "Yeah, sure, can't have a party without it."

"Party?" Lindsey tried not to sound horrified.

"Sorry, buddy, can't really invite you." Skin-Head gave Lindsey a critical once over. "You're not really our type of people.

Lindsey kept the 'thank god' to himself. "I'll be happy if you just get the coffin the hell out of my place."

Skin-Head puffed more smoke at him and Lindsey still refused to give him the satisfaction of him coughing. "You mean now?"

"Yes, now. Can't have a party without it, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah, don't get your candy ass all tight." Skin-Head came out into the hall. "You gonna give me a hand?"

Lindsey held up his prosthetic limb. "Could but it's not likely to help you much. Why don't you get your partner?"

"He's sleeping." Skin-Head scratched his crotch. "Can't we do this later?"

"They're coming to retrieve your paid-for coffin as a misdelivery soon," Lindsey lied.

Skin-Head sighed and went in to get his companion. Lindsey went back into his place. The two skin heads came in. The second one smelled gamey.

"You got some nice stuff," Smelly said, his eyes casing Lindsey's living room like a common thief.

"Yes, I do," Lindsey said, cold and arrogant.

"What happened to your hand?" Skin-Head asked as he and Smelly tried to lug the coffin out.

Lindsey raised an eyebrow. "A vampire cut it off with an ax. Really, I should have keep the coffin. I know people who could make good use of it."

The two musicians gave him nervous looks – probably thinking him insane as opposed to believing vampires were real - and hauled faster. Lindsey slammed the door behind them and tried to figure out what to do with his day. He looked outside from his balcony and saw James, Sophie and Dominique propped up against a beautiful truck. They were eyeballing the front door of his condo complex.

"Son of a bitch."

Lindsey decided he wasn't going to let them get to him. He went to the underground garage and went out the back entrance. He headed for the botanical gardens. Why waste a spring full of beauty worrying about bad luck, good sex with all the wrong person, shitty neighbors or being stalked by supernatural beings. He needed to unwind and think of a plan.