Fun
A/N: Hola! It's me again with another story! Today, Nova's running late, so Sprx is helping Ivy with the disclaimer.
Ivy: So, you think I'm incompetent, huh? You're obviously a glutton for punishment.
Beastfire: grinning Yup!
Sprx: Yeah, so Beastfire doesn't own the Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce-
Nova: runs in, yelling at some guy in the distance GO TO-
Beastfire: Yaah! On with the story!
Antauri was meditating, one day, when the observation was made…
"Dude, you need to learn to have some fun!"
The monkey was taken aback at this statement as it broke his concentration and he fell to the floor.
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is you're a stiff, you're too serious, and ya wouldn't know fun if it came up and bit ya in the-"
"Ivy, your idea of fun is different than my idea of fun."
"C'mon. It's the least ya can do since the whole incident in the training room."
"You've already gotten your revenge."
"Fine. I guess I'll just have to tell the team about your…problem."
Antauri's face wore a worried expression as he thought about his embarassing problem, where he would laugh at the word "boogars" whenever he drank something around someone who said it. If the rest of the team knew, the embarassment would be unbearable. Begrudingly, he said: "What do you plan to do?"
The meerkat's eyes lit up as she smirked. Oh, how she'd been waiting for him to say those words. Well, actually, she'd been waiting to be called a goddess, but this was close enough. She was soon joined by Nova, Sprx, Otto, and Chiro. They also agreed that Antauri needed to learn to have fun.
"Okay, Antauri," Ivy began. "First things first. I'd like for you to make a list of goals, and a to do list for today."
Antauri did so, thinking that this would have nothing to do with anything of importance. Ivy took the lists and read them, eyebrow raised bemusedly. He had to be kidding her!
"Are you serious? You have too many goals."
She handed his lists back.
"Now," she continued. "I want you to take those lists, hold them in both hands, and RIP 'EM APART! With this course, you won't need 'em."
He ripped the lists in half. Ivy shook her head disapprovingly and showed him how to mutilate them. Next, was Course 1: Mindless Video Games. The teacher was Chiro.
"What you wanna do is forget about reality. It doesn't apply to video games."
"Why is that?"
"Don't question the teacher!," Ivy snapped from behind.
Chiro, Antauri, and Ivy began a game of "Tomb Raider: The Real Lara Croft", where Lara Croft was a sloppy, deteriorating gravedigger who robbed the tombs at the cemetary (um…I have no idea where this idea came from). Antauri, no matter what instruction or cheat codes he was given, could not get into it. Chiro and Ivy slapped their foreheads. This was promising to be a long day. After 137 pitiful attempts at winning, they decided to send him to Course 2: "The Joys of Sleeping For Hours on End", taught by Otto. Ivy was only there to monitor progress, as she didn't sleep at all.
"Listen, Antauri," Otto said. "The secret to endless sleeping is to not think. You'll be better off that way. It works for me."
"Yeah, Otto, I think we all know that," Ivy snickered.
"This shouldn't be too hard," Antauri said.
"You might also wanna learn the basics of drooling-"
"No, thank you, Otto."
Otto shrugged, laid upside down, and instantly fell asleep. Antauri tried to do the same, but wasn't as much of a natural as Otto. He couldn't get to sleep at all. Ivy rolled her eyes and telekinetically KO'd him, so that he'd go to sleep. When he was concsious again, he would be subjected to Course 3: "Cracking Jokes 101" with Sprx.
"The first point would be to make an observation," said Sprx. "Like, if I were to see that Ivy was puttin' on a little weight, I'd-"
"Hey, wait a second!," Ivy yelled. "Just what are you insinuating?! Are you saying I'm fat?! I'M GONNA POUND YOU INTO THE GROUND FOR THAT LITTLE COMMENT!!!"
Sprx began sweating profusely. "Well," he said. "I believe this concludes Course 3!". Sprx ran for his life while being chased by a very annoyed mutant. Course 4, "Taking Out Frustrations in a Fun Way", with Nova as the instructor.
"Now, what would this one be about, Nova?"
"What you need to do is find a good punching bag, first, Antauri. Like mine, only THIS ONE'S MINE! GET YOUR OWN!"
Antauri looked at the yellow monkey in bewilderment. She'd obviously dipped into Ivy's stash of sugar, coffee, and beer. Man, was she out of it! Antauri backed away as Nova flipped out. He ran right into Ivy and knocked her into the wall. He helped her up.
"Sorry."
"Stow it. Now, it's time for Course 5: Alcohol-and-Junk Food-Consumptionology. And I'm in charge."
Antauri felt a sense of impending doom in his gut. No good could have come of this. A few minutes later, they were surrounded by heaps of beer, chips, and all other kinds of junk foods. Ivy was gorging herself, completely forgetting the concept of table manners. The black monkey also ate, only much more controlled. The meerkat looked at him, flew over, and crammed the food down his throat. After about an hour, Antauri was too full to see straight. Ivy was still eating, with no signs of stopping.
Gibson came out at this time and saw that Antauri was about to be sick. He ran over to help him out.
"What is going on in here?," he asked.
"Well, thanks a lot, Gibson! You just ruined a perfectly good crash course! I was just about to show him the true way to belch!"
To emphasize her point, Ivy released a no-holds-barred, ground shaking, eardrum shattering belch. Gibson glared at her and helped Antauri into the lab. As he left, Ivy yelled, "HEY! YEAH YOU, GIBSON! YOU'RE NEXT! MUAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH-AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Gibson ignored her and went on his way. The rest of the team joined her.
"What was that about?,"Nova asked.
"I don't think we wanna know," Chiro said, as Ivy continued laughing psychotically.
The End of Another One-Shot
P.S.: Thank you to anyone who has reviewed my stories! This means you, Kuramafangirl11!
And if anyone would like to borrow Ivy, let me know. But, if you besmirch her character…I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND…uh…see about a compromise? Oh, well. See you next time I write a whacko story!