What have I done?

Len's feet pound pavement in a violent rush. He's never been in such a hurry, but right now this is an emergency. This is something that needs to be addressed and taken care of right now, or he may never be able to look Rin in the eye again.

Rin. He hurt Rin.

He hurt her. Completely involuntarily, like something had taken possession of his limb from outside them and then forced him to close his hands on her soft neck, ready to take her life. He almost killed her. He had felt his fingertips on her windpipe, the crushing sensation as he kept her from breathing.

He had nearly killed the woman he loves, and it had been completely out of his control.

It can't happen again.

She looked at him so kindly, as if immediately forgiving him for hurting her, and he couldn't take it then and he can't think about it now. Rin is too gentle, too nice; she was about to tell him everything's alright, but it isn't.

'You had some internal wiring damaged.'

In the incident where Mikuo and his gang ripped him up, they had gone as far as to ruin his internals, and he knew, but he had assumed that they were fine. He had felt fine after Gumi's repairs, but perhaps that was a misconception he had told himself so that he wouldn't have to see Rin's sad face anymore.

He had lied to himself to cover up the problem, and it came back to haunt him.

Why had he done that? Is that flaw of sentience that makes him do completely illogical things? If he had told Rin he needed to be repaired then she surely would have, but considering her reaction back there, maybe not.

I can't stay like this. I have to talk to Gumi right now.

Leaping onto her front door, his fist pounds against the door, calling through the wood. "Gumi, it's Len. Gumi!"

No answer, he uses his desperation to throw his shoulder into the door, snapping it open with little effort. The sound causes Gumi to walk out of her room, terrified, and Miki to follow suit. He makes a beeline for the greenette, but Miki steps in front of him and presses a hand to his chest, threatening with only her gaze.

"Len? You're back," she says, not as a question but an observance, looking confused and tired.

"Gumi, I need you to fix whatever's broken inside me," he says quickly, trying to get past Miki, but the redhead prevents him from moving any further. "You know what's wrong with me, right? I need you to repair it."

"What are you talking about? I can't make any changes to you unless Rin is here with you. Why are you alone? And making demands?" she asks, crossing her arms. "You broke into my home and I'm supposed to just drop everything for you?"

"I hurt Rin!"

His words cause her eyes to widen.

"Is she alive?" Gumi asks, keeping a measured tone even though she's unsure.

"Yes, of course, I could never kill her," Len says with horror, the words falling out in a rush. "But you have to understand me when I say that even if she refuses, this has to be done. I can never allow this to happen again. You have to understand!"

A dawn of realization crosses Gumi's features, and then she snaps her fingers, the signal for Miki to let Len go. As he takes a cautious step up to her, her eyes darken.

"You know what it might mean for me to work on your system, don't you?" she asks seriously. "If I start digging, you may forget Rin, or your conscience will be snuffed out. Do you fully understand what you're asking for?"

He knows. He knows all too well, but the idea of forgetting Rin entirely and not causing her pain, instead of randomly being unable to stop himself from doing much worse with his memories, is a much better choice. This is what needs to be done. For himself, but more importantly, for Rin.

"I do," he replies, nodding. "I fully accept whatever occurs during this, but I'm doing it for her. I won't let anything bad happen to her again, especially not because of me."

Gumi studies his face for a minute, tilting her head. "...Fascinating," she murmurs. "I've never seen an android quite like you, Len."

He shrinks a little, a realization of his own breaking over his mind like ice water. He's revealing his sentience to her. She can see it as clear as day, like he'd painted it out on the floor for her to read.

Yet she doesn't seem to be worried about it, instead thoughtful and intrigued.

"Will you please help me, Gumi?" he asks, and she hums under her breath.

"Yes," she finally says, sighing. "You may have broken down my door and demanded my services, but… It's not every day I can help an android who asks for it personally."

Without another word, she leads him into her workshop, the glinting metal table waiting for him. He stares at it for a moment as she walks around him, prepping, before steeling himself.

This is for Rin.

Not for me, not for anyone else; for Rin.

I just hope that I can wake up and still remember her.

.x.X.x.

"Gumi! Gumi! Don't!"

Words rip from her throat like knives slicing through her vocal cords, and Rin is tripping over herself at every turn trying to get to the woman's place before Len does, even though she knows that's futile too.

He's already there, she's sure, but maybe she can get there in time to stop him. Gumi will be confused no doubt, and it might give her just enough time to do something

Or maybe she won't get there before she agrees, but she wouldn't, right? Gumi has no right to alter Len without her permission, it's a written law regarding androids; but considering how much help she's asked of her recently it might not be completely impossible.

No, please, I don't want him to forget me.

What if he dies in the process? I just got over that fear and now it's back to haunt me again.

I need him. I need Len with me.

I want this to stop!

When she finally reaches Gumi's house, the door is smashed in, surprising Rin until an icy feeling runs down her spine. What if Len did that?

She hops into the open doorway like a professional acrobat, not wasting any time. She's greeted by Miki's cold gaze, standing in front of her.

"Miki, where is Gumi? Is Len here?" she asks, starting to walk past the android.

Miki's arm shoots out, smacking hard into Rin's chest, causing her to cough and falter.

"Do not enter," the android says quietly in her lullaby tones.

"What? Is he in there? Len!"

Rin starts to call out into the building, but Miki picks her up, and slings her over her shoulder eliciting cries from the blonde.

"Let me down! What are you doing?!"

She puts the flailing woman into a chair, and when Rin tries to immediately jump out, the redhead's slim hand pushes her back in without flinching, acting as a vise to corner her.

"You may not enter," Miki says again.

"That's not your decision to make, you-!"

"It was not my decision," Miki continues, ignoring Rin's anger and instead silencing her. "It was Len's."

His name sends her reeling back into her chair, and she meets Miki's eyes with abject confusion. She doesn't understand what's going on. Her thoughts are a whirlwind that refuses to cease.

"Len's… decision?"

He decided this? He was the one who told them to keep her away? He also chose to come here for this operation, too.

What does this mean? How does this happen? How can an android directly disobey and even go so far as to make choices on his own without his owner's permission?

That sentence bleeds acid onto her tongue, making her wish she hadn't dared think of herself that way. She's not just Len's 'owner'. That's a poor title for what she is, or what he means to her, but what else is she supposed to call herself? His partner? His lower?

Humans are on a different level than androids. They aren't seen equally, and never have been. She is supposed to be superior; it sounds so disgusting put into that perspective. She's never once thought of Len as lesser than she is.

God, she's turning herself inside out with all this back and forth. But all she can do is dwell and wait, because Miki stands over here protectively like she'll throw herself in front of her the moment she breathes the wrong direction.

It feels like hours that pass waiting, her heart in her throat, her doubts and fears written in her body language like a neon sign. She just wants to know Len is okay. If only she had been sooner.

Is it so selfish of her to have hoped that everything was going to be fine? She had made the mistake of brushing his wiring issues under the rug, and it's coming back to ruin her. Why? Why can't things be fine for just a moment, just long enough for her to grasp that feeling of happiness she craves? Sure, Len being with her is happiness in itself, but every which way she turns there's something waiting in the wings to drag her into the shadows.

Did she cause this? No, that's a silly question; she did. And now she's facing what she's wrought.

After ages of waiting, the door to Gumi's workshop opens again, and Rin feels that horrible memory of waiting to see if Len was living resurface like a demon in a swamp. She wants this to be over.

"Gumi," she breathes, standing up. Miki tries to stop her, but Gumi raises a hand and waves her off, allowing Rin to move forward with the speed of light and grip onto the greenette's shoulders.

"Why? Why didn't you stop him?!" she cries. "Is he okay? Why did you do this? How could you go behind my back and-"

"His repairs are complete," Gumi says, ignoring her much like Miki had a bit ago. Her eyes stare off somewhere past Rin's head.

"What does that mean? Does he remember me?" Rin's voice cracks from her worry, and Gumi closes her eyes.

"No, it doesn't mean that," Gumi says. "It means that whatever happens now, he won't be glitching any longer. Now we wait."

"That's it?!"

Rin stares daggers into Gumi's somber expression, horrified.

"That's all you have to say? You directly went behind my back and did this for him even after I told you no! How could you? Why, Gumi, why?!"

"Because Len asked me to, Rin," Gumi finally exclaims, shoving the blonde off her and returning her glare. "Because Len told me that the one thing he never wanted to do again was that!"

Her finger reaches out close enough to prod Rin's neck, and a shooting pain responds, forcing her to cover the purpling bruises Len had left on her skin.

"I did this for Len, because this was completely Len's decision to make!"

Rin gapes at her. All the feelings she wanted to yell out in rage, all the hurt and the worry and fear, every word dies in her throat, leaving only a hollow behind.

There's nothing she can say.

Gumi, unmoving in the face of her friend's expression, takes Rin's arm and leads her back to the chair she was on before, forcing her to take a seat. The blonde is helpless in the process, plopping down and struggling with what to do. Gumi doesn't give her time to dwell, however.

"There's something you need to know about Len, Rin," she offers, crouching in front of her much like a parent would talk down to a child. How silly, Rin ponders in the back of her head. Isn't she younger than me?

"What… do you mean…?" she barely speaks, her voice inaudible for anyone safe for the woman before her.

What could it be? What is it that has her looking so severe?

"The reason why I did what I did is because Len is… different from other androids," Gumi begins, making sure to keep level eye contact with the blonde. "He's not programmed the same way. In fact, he goes against most any software androids usually have. Len is…"

She pauses.

"...Sentient."

A heartbeat, then two. It's a moment that stretches on between the two of them while Rin finds it hard to swallow.

…Sentient?

"That's not a very funny joke."

Her words pour out before she can think them through, and she lets out a halfhearted chuckle, trying to make light of the situation.

"Len isn't sentient, I don't know where you got that," she says. "That's impossible."

Gumi says nothing, and the return of the pregnant silence feels even more worrisome. She searches her friend's face for any sign of the lie, but it isn't there.

"...Gumi?" she whispers. "It's impossible, isn't it?"

It's like the world has dropped from beneath her feet in that instance, where Gumi shakes her head and murmurs something under her breath she can't hear. Her head whirls, her surroundings tilting on an axis and leaving her behind to crash under the waves.

No. No, no no.

This isn't real.

This is a sick joke, right? This isn't something that can actually happen. Gumi has to be lying.

Len can't be sentient.

"It's not impossible."

Gumi's words are an unwelcome break in her thoughts. The woman continues on without missing a beat in the face of adversity.

"It's highly improbable, as androids have security measures to avoid this from ever becoming a problem, but Len has somehow broken his own code. Something gave him enough incentive to think outside his own box, per se, and now he no longer follows the rules laid down by the creators that made him. I am completely serious, Rin. Len is sentient. He can think for himself just as you and I can."

Thank God Rin is sitting down right now, because if she wasn't, she would have been descending to the floor with shock. Her whole body feels shaky, and she fights to keep a level head.

A lot of things come into focus in that moment, things that Rin had brushed off and made excuses for even unconsciously. Things Len has said and done, like when he attacked Mikuo or told him off at the beach, the way he had spoken to her during the fireworks festival, all the times he's acted strangely when she wondered what was going on in his head.

This has been going on for a long time, and she feels so stupid for not noticing it earlier or even beginning to fathom it. It's a shock to her system, still not quite registering.

Len being sentient, acting like a human in an android's body, shouldn't be possible, but after all she's seen from him this seems the most likely option. It feels so odd to think of, like it's illegal. Maybe it is, considering how strict androids are surveyed.

It brings a new fear to the forefront of her mind, one she can't easily extinguish. If someone, anyone, knows about this, it could mean Len is taken from her, or worse.

God, what is happening?

"I know you need time to think about this," Gumi says softly, "but you don't have that time right now. I want you to fully understand what I'm telling you, because if you don't, it could put you and Len both in serious trouble. Do you get what I'm trying to tell you?"

Rin opens her mouth, but only a weak squeak echoes out. She tries again, trying to regulate her breathing.

"...How?" she whispers. "How can he… be…?"

"I don't know, Rin," Gumi replies, sitting on the floor in front of her even though there are available chairs beside Rin, and crossing her legs below her. "This is a really rare case if I've ever seen one. Androids aren't supposed to ever be like this, so it's likely that Len may be the only robot ever to assume this kind of mentality. He can feel like we do, he can express every emotion as we do, yet with the body controlled by mechanics instead of heart and soul. With that kind of power, he could be taken advantage of by anyone with the knowledge to do something with it."

Rin leans forward, attempting to wrap her mind around this but failing. "What am I supposed to do about it? Am I supposed to- to turn him in? How do I-"

"It's very- no, extremely likely he became this way because of you," the greenette says, interrupting her slow meltdown. "His feelings for you outweighed the ones programmed in his codes, to the point of overriding them. I don't think you need to do anything, Rin, but what I can tell you is you can't let anyone else outside of your trust know about this. This is not only a breakthrough for any kind of research regarding androids, but also the opportunity for anything and anyone to use him for their own gain."

It's too much, too much to handle. Every word she says only bounces around like a ping pong ball in Rin's head, threatening to pop out with Rin's sanity.

Along with it comes a new frightening thought. The thought she's been trying to evade for so long, but now can't be thrown away.

"What happens to Len if… if I'm not here?" Rin asks slowly, hesitant. "When I'm gone, what will happen to him?"

This time it's Gumi's turn to be perturbed.

"I think he'd become obsolete long before you would die, Rin," she responds oddly. "You have about twenty years before he's completely reverted back to a pile of scrap metal, I'd say. This kind of technology doesn't last forever as much as we wish it did. Even in the unlikely circumstance that you would die sooner, Len would not last long. With such a strong tie to you, well…"

She allows herself a moment to speak fully.

"...I believe Len would die without you quite quickly."

Rin's breath catches in her throat hard, like a lump blocking her lungs. Her blood goes ice cold.

No, this is just as she feared. All the nightmares that hinted at this have now come true in just one fell swoop, and there isn't a damned thing she can do about it. God, what will she do now?

"Excuse me."

The sound of someone approaching forces Rin and Gumi both to look up in anticipation. Miki stands before them, stiff and unbothered, though her words weigh heavy.

"The android has woken up."

Rin's heart plummets to the ground.

This is it, she realizes. There is no going back from this now.

Either he'll have recovered completely, or he'll have forgotten me. Or…

…Or the Len I've come to know and love will be gone. What if that's already the case?

How do I handle this change? This… new reality?

Will it even matter once I step through that door and know for sure who he is?

Who Len is…

Android. Human. Alive.

No matter what happens now, I have to face the fact that he is my…

…one last love.