Still sobbing, Ryouga keeps going, "I'm so sorry…you warned me…you warned me so many times…to not cliff dive here. And I knew, I knew the wind was even worse than usual that day. B-but…"

He digs his fingers into the ground, and Yuma almost tries to get up and reach for him once more, only for the next words to stop him, "I…I wanted to look cool in front of you." the other admits in a loud shriek, "And I wanted to see that you'd stick by me no matter what!"

Yuma gasps in shock. Kaito briefly looks away, ashamed to feel annoyed even at this moment. But considering he knows what's coming next, he can't help it, "I was young, you were my first crush, and we…we were so different!" he cries, hair sweeping through the dirt, "You were so sunny and cheerful, while I was the cold mess I still am today." he admits with a bitter, almost magical laugh.

Kaito almost mumbles under his breath 'isn't that the half of it', but he doesn't, because there's no one who would hear him anyway.

As Yuma proves by looking nowhere near him, bringing a hand to his mouth as the weight of what the other just said comes to him, "S-Shark…!"

Thankfully for Kaito's heart, Yuma isn't allowed even a moment of happiness over the fact that his first crush was reciprocated after all. Both because Ryouga still doesn't take note of his presence, and because of his next shout.

"You had so many friends! What else was I supposed to do to get your attention?!" Ryouga says with so much vitriol, starting to shake on the spot, that Yuma is shocked right back into silence, "And so many of them, from girls to boys, had their eyes on you too, yet you never realized it! And you're not the type to be impressed by shitty guitar playing, so…"

If it were any other circumstance, Kaito would scoff 'of course' at the guitar part, but he's far too busy mulling over the fact that his suspicions over Yuma being popular are right, to care about such trivial matters.

And also surprised that Ryouga is still going without any prompting. Perhaps he isn't needed here?

"My dueling wasn't enough either. Not when you could meet someone better at any moment, so…" Ryouga mumbles bitterly as he finally gets his face away from the dirt. Kaito hates the fact that he still looks conventionally pretty even when he's a mess of filth and tears, "I played the keep away game, which came natural to me because I'm such a jerk. And it worked! No matter what, you always wanted to spend the day with me instead of your other friends."

How lovely.

(Kaito takes some solace in the fact that the man is right, and Yuma would be able to meet someone with better dueling skill and dump his ass. That person being Kaito, of course. He has no doubt he could wipe the floor with the mop of blue hair any day of the week.)

(Briefly, he wonders, in another lifetime, could that have been their story? A mess worthy of a soap opera, for sure, and yet, infinitely more hopeful than this?)

Now rising, but still shaking, Ryoyga closes his eyes, lost in the memories, "And instead of using that opportunity to confess to you, I…I kept holding it off, because I was a coward." he confesses as he holds onto his own elbows, "And look at where my feelings led you! To your watery grave!"

At that, Yuma finally tries to protest, "But wait—ah!" only to bring a hand to his head, overwhelmed with sudden pain.

Kaito doesn't reach over to him, as he knows it's useless. Yuma cannot escape from this headache unless Ryouga shuts up…but for his own sake, it's better that he just put up with it.

And finally be free.

After a few heavy breaths, Ryouga keeps going, "I tried to reach out for you but…we kept getting further and further away from each other…and eventually, you began to sink, and no matter how much I tried, I couldn't see you any more. And it was so cold…"

At that, Yuma begins to whine all the more. It's now his turn to rest his head against the ground, and he desperately tries to cover his ears in order to block out the words.

But it's of no use. No matter how ragged his voice is, it's impossible to misunderstand what Ryouga is saying, as if the wind was carrying his words and amplifying them, "I swam away to the shore. Because I knew I'd freeze up and die soon. I was hoping you'd be right behind me, fooled myself I was leading the way for you, but…" he stops, whines, and Kaito finally sees a tear fall, "I was just being selfish. The moment I turned around for my own sake, is the second time I doomed you to die."

"No, no, no." Yuma begins to cry, both in desperate delusion and due to the pain he's in, "I'm not…you're the one who…"

And Kaito can only wish that Yuma was right. That his idea about Ryouga having died was the truth.

But unfortunately, Ryouga just keeps smashing those hopes into small bits, "And if only that was all I did. But no…I had to be even more of a scumbag. I had to prove I wasn't worth one bit of the friendship you gave me, much less any chance at your heart."

When he next opens his eyes, even Kaito is shocked at how empty they are. Perhaps, it's for the best that Yuma can't see them after all, "I had to tell. Even someone like me wasn't capable of just pretending I didn't know what happened to you. I was scared but…I told your family, the police, your friends…Kotori." he only lets out that last one after a long pause.

And yet, Yuma's reaction doesn't change at all, so despite himself, Kaito finally gives the other his full attention. He can't help but be curious about the significance of that name.

Ryouga slowly brings his hands in front of his face, as if he's a toddler who doesn't understand that they belong to him, "Of course, everyone hated me. Everyone wished that I was the one who had perished instead. No matter how much they tried to assure me otherwise…I could tell." he smiles, one so frightening that it makes Kaito step back a little, "It was just like when I survived the car accident, but Rio didn't. And I can't even blame them. My existence is so meaningless compared to you both, and yet…"

Kaito has no clue what he's talking about. Doesn't even care to know. Still loathes this guy, and wishes Yuma had been initially right about this. But perhaps because of a deep-seated, almost instinctive human sympathy, even he can't help but feel a tiny bit of pity for the other at this moment.

"Shark…no…that is…" Yuma gasps out between moans.

But Ryouga just hovers one hand over him, gazing at it as if he's staring at the stars, "All, except for her…"

Briefly, the ring on his finger glints. And then, Kaito understands what he's going to say.

"Kotori…she never blamed me at all. She was the only one who cared that I was falling apart. She kept coming over to comfort me, to share our pain…even though I was the reason for it, she never threw it to my face." he states, using the same hand to grasp his chest as if he's in sudden pain, "I never saw her that way before, but truly, she's just a kind and bright as you were. I guess that's why she was your oldest friend. And why you two liked each other. You were a perfect match."

At that, Kaito gasps, shooting Yuma a look. Now he wishes he had waited for the other to share more, before coming to such an important decision.

To be fair, even almost rolling on the ground, Yuma's voice sounds surprised as well, "Wha….what?"

And sadly, that is the one thing Ryouga is unlikely to miraculously answer, "And honestly, the fact that my attraction to her began both because no one else would have me, and because she reminded me of you, is all there needs to be said about me." he settles for adding, a mixture of bitterness and sarcasm.

Kaito feels queasy just thinking about the implications of that. But at least, this guy feels somewhat self-aware? Either way, it makes Kaito happy that he didn't rush into marriage, waiting for things to feel right. It sure paid off now, and he wonders, if either Ryouga or this Kotori person could say the same.

"And being the piece of filth that I am, I could deal with all that. Take her from you. Marry her. Move into a new home with her, eat her food, go to bed with her. All while ignoring the fact you ever existed. Put it out of my mind almost entirely." Ryouga continues, shame seeping into his every word as he takes a deep breath, "But…even I…"

He begins to shake, prompting Kaito to listen in carefully, and after a long stretch of silence…"She wants to have a baby, Yuma."

While Kaito doesn't get what's so shocking about that, Yuma moans loudly. So it must be important…he guesses.

Going by the way Ryouga throws his hands into his hair and screams, "With me. Me!" loud enough to make Kaito flinch, it likely is. "Instead of that child having someone like you for a father, someone sure to make any kid happy, they are going to be stuck with me!"

With a shriek worse than any baby, Kaito is inclined to agree. Yuma however, stops struggling for a bit, though he still can't manage to lift his head, "A child…you…Kotori…"

"No matter all the things I've done, I can't do that! I can't put that final nail in the coffin." the other admits miserably, hands lowering to his face and grasping the skin so tightly, Kaito would be inclined to think he was going to gouge his own eyes out, "I'm not worthy of any of this, Yuma. And I can't stop pretending otherwise. That's why I began to come here, to try and make amends to you, but…"

Finally, he seems to remember he's not alone, and lets go of his own face long enough to throw Kaito a bitter look, "I never even managed to walk up here until this prick dragged me here. I guess I'll never change…"

Kaito rolls his eyes. Yuma just keeps whining, "Ah…ahn!" and by this point, Kaito is getting concerned to the point he thinks he should try and help the other after all.

Sighing as he finally appears to calm down just a little, Ryouga mumbles, "But I don't even know why I'm here. After all…in fifteen years, they have never found your body. As if the sea claimed its treasure and refuses to give it back. I don't blame it." he chuckles sadly, digging into his pocket and fishing out something, "And yet, this washed up on the beach the next week, when the search had been called off, yet I fruitlessly came here one last time…"

As Kaito squints in order to get a closer look, he can't help but let out a surprised gasp. Ryouga is dangling a golden pendant between his fingers, and while he can't be sure…he has the feeling this is the pendant Yuma's father gifted him, the one he never took off.

What a strange thing to happen, for Yuma to be lost forever, and yet a piece of metal managed to find its way home.

Only one way to find out if it's the thing he's thinking or not, though. Without a word, he walks up to Ryouga and roughly snatches the thing. Surprisingly, the other doesn't fight him off or even throw him a glare; just keeps staring rather emptily at the edge of the cliff, likely lost in a sea of regret and too tired out from the emotional outburst to do anything more.

So Kaito keeps going, and kneels right by Yuma. Tenderly, he shakes the other boy until he's forced to at least take his hands from over his head. It hurts, to see how much Yuma is shaking, pain seeking from every pore, yet he still places the cold and rather heavy pendant in the other's hands, "Your father's gift. It came back to you."

Still trembling, Yuma struggles to open his eyes, "Ah…my key…but how…"

"It's okay, Yuma." Kaito assures as he gently runs a hand over the other's hair, "You don't need to hold on to your guilt any more. As you can see—" he points to the not completely still man behind them, "He's alive, and clearly older. You did nothing wrong. You are free now."

Slowly, Yuma blinks at him. His shakes subside, as memories start coming to him, "That's right…I never made it back to shore. The one who got left behind was…" he looks down at himself, to the pendant in his hands. To the clearly out of fashion clothes compared to Ryouga. To the forest around them, "…me. We went cliff diving in the winter, and it's summer now…"

Regretfully, Kaito nods, "It's impossible for you to not have come back home during all those months." he points out, closing his hands over Yuma's and bringing them close to the boy's chest, "All of that was just your brain trying to make sense of things. You're—"

"I'm dead." Yuma finishes for him. His voice is low and scared, but still full of realization, "I have been for years."

At that, Kaito fights off the urge to sob himself. He can feel his eyes getting teary, "Yes."

Taking a deep breath, Yuma lets out a single tear as he sobs, "Thank you for doing this for me, Kaito."

All Kaito can do, is nod back, and allow Yuma's hands to slip from him as the younger boy gets up. He doesn't turn around to watch Yuma walk over to Ryouga and say, "It's okay, Shark…it's okay."

He hears Ryouga shriek, "How did this—that other dude is still there!" and Kaito can only guess that Yuma gave the pendant back to him, "Yuma…are…are you…"

"It's okay, Shark." Yuma talks once more, perhaps uselessly, "You can move on with your life. I don't blame you, and…take care of Kotori, okay? I'm sure you're going to make a great father."

Kaito is already walking away, not sticking around to verify if Ryouga heard any of that or not. He can only guess, by the loud sob that follows, that at least Yuma's feelings reached him.

Good for him.

Because all Kaito will get out of this, is another hole to add to his heart.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It's been a long time since he's closed the windows and curtains all by himself, but he supposes he should get used to it by now. And that he'll never get to know just why he shared this weird phobia with Yuma.

The saddest thing is, he can't even look forward to the next new moon, because what is he going to do on that day? Go out by himself? How will that differ from the rest of his days from now on?

With a sigh, he turns on his cellphone. It's about time he starts to look for a job, get his life back in order. Maybe finally message Chris, ask him for a long call. Maybe even share what happened to him, and then pass it off as an idea he had for a book or something, and wanted to see if it was engaging enough to fool the other.

He'll deal with the Haruto issue later. First, maybe he should go out tomorrow, to at least stock up on food…even if he still has some left in his pantry. Come to think of, he never cleaned the garage, did he? The place must smell awful. Hopefully, whatever was going on with his body whenever he tried to get in, has passed by now.

As he's stuck going over all those thoughts, he doesn't hear someone come into the house until the footsteps are right behind him, "Who's there?" he shouts, alarmed, clutching his phone tightly.

"Me. Who else would it be?" a familiar voice replies…Yuma.

Kaito can't hold back from shrieking in surprise, "What are you doing here?!"

And Yuma just tilts his head, "Hiding from the moonlight as always?" he smiles, though there is something off about it that Kaito can't shake, "Or at least, I'm sticking close to you, and since you're still hiding away…"

For a moment, Kaito wants to jump in utter relief. Yuma isn't gone! He's not alone! It's weird, sure, but Kaito doesn't mind spending the rest of his life here with a haunted house, if that's what it takes to keep the other in his life.

But his irritating, logical side pipes in, along with his good conscience. So it is with great regret that he swallows the knot in his throat and goes, "But why? Shouldn't you be able to move on now? I thought that was what you needed…"

Yuma just laughs, "Yeah, I think I can do it. But nothing can force me to do it." he points out, again looking at the closed window, "And I'm not going until you're ready."

Kaito tilts his head, confused, "So…you're just going to wait for me to die too? That's a very sweet thought, and honestly, thank you. But it might take decades for that to happen. Are you sure it's even fine for you to wait for so long? Your very sense of self might eventually fade away, making you some sort of wraith or something. For all we know, at least…" he rambles, hating the fact he's just throwing conjectures out there, and hating the fact he might be right even more.

But Yuma just gives me a sad look, "I mean, maybe. You're the smart one, after all. We don't have to worry about that though." he states resolutely, closing his eyes and taking a deep sigh, "Since you can come with me right now."

At that, Kaito can only blink. Surely, Yuma can't be saying what he thinks he's saying, right? "What the…" he whispers, likely looking like a confused, gaping fish.

"Like I said, you're smart. Surely, you understand our similarities now? The fear of the moon, the headaches when we thought about things we didn't want to remember…" he trails off, giving Kaito a stupidly hopeful look.

Which Kaito can't help but rebuff rather harshly, "You are jumping to some insane conclusions there." he grunts out, unable to keep his fist from clenching nervously, "You have no proof that those things were just because of your deceased status. And for all we know, I might just have a brain tumour or something."

Yes, that made sense. He had skipped his usual medicals due to the stuff going on with Haruto, and if he had some issue they hadn't caught last time, the stress had surely made it worse. That's why his body had been acting so strange…he was just ill.

Yuma throws him a pitiful look that makes Kaito want to turn around close the door on his face, if he didn't know better and forgot the fact Yuma could just go through walls (which explains just how he 'broke' into the house previously, and how he got into Kaito's room without triggering the giraffe trap).

(And also because of the fact that, he still very much fears this might be the last time he sees Yuma. And regardless of the conversation going his way or not, he doesn't want to end this meeting with any regrets. Not like with Mizael.)

Regardless, Yuma keeps going, "Alright, let's put it in a way you can understand…" he starts slowly, as if Kaito is some sort of dimwitted fool, "What facts made you come to the realization that I was a ghost? Cause I doubt you talked to Shark before this afternoon, so it couldn't have been from him." he then bites his lower lip, looking awkward as he mumbles, "And I know for a fact you haven't left this house since you got here…you don't have any acquaintances here."

'I have you, and even now, that is enough for me.' Kaito almost adds, but stops himself from doing so, since it's irrelevant for the topic at hand in the grand scheme of things.

So he chooses to play along instead, "Several factors. The main one was actually your friend. His peculiarly shaped ride and blue hair, along with the fact you said he was the only one with a motorcycle you knew around here, all clued me off to the fact that the person rudely awakening me every morning was in fact him." he informs, "And your story of him dying made me realize what actually went on pretty quickly, and why he came here every day, but always turned around before he could too further into the path."

Yuma nods quietly, then adds when it's clear Kaito isn't going to keep going unprompted, "And those may have been right, but you are a skeptical person by nature. I'm not your little brother, so your overprotective gut instinct doesn't work with me." he self-depreciates with a laugh, "I know you needed far more than that to take an action as drastic as talking to Shark. So…what else?"

He sighs, knowing he has no way out of this, and hating that Yuma can be so smart and manipulative when he wants to, "Very small things that just kept adding up. How you managed to get inside my house despite none of the windows being tampered with. How you always disappeared every morning, and only appeared back onto that cliff in a very specific time period."

He meant to start off simply, honestly. But his mind immediately jumped to the cliff situation, for a very particular reason that had never quite left his mind, "Your general aversion to cliff diving, and unwillingness to go to the beach. Most of all, a dream I had when you found me fainted, that I now realize was…of you, drowning."

Clearly not having expected that, Yuma gasps out, "That…!"

"Don't ask me how it works. It just happened." Kaito says with a shrug, wishing to move things along, "But the cold, the darkness, you trying to reach out for Shark, your body slowly growing numb…I experienced it all. Perhaps, those were your residual memories, stuck on the place you died. And because we already knew each other, when I dunked my head into the water….they just came to me."

Yuma brings both hands to his face as the implications of what Kaito is saying comes to him. It occurs to Kaito that Yuma's death was an unpleasant one, not something he wants to think about even without the headache pain to go along with it. And that his ridiculously empathetic nature is making him recoil with horror that he accidentally made someone else experience the same pain.

But Yuma was the one who brought this all on, so tough luck for him, "When you mentioned how cold it was when Ryouga died, that's when my brain put it all together. But there were other things." he shakes his head, wanting to distract Yuma from the matter with the simpler stuff, "For starters, your clothing is very out of fashion. Even someone like me knows it, and surely, even a remote place like this has the internet. There's also the fact you never changed them…"

He walks over to Yuma, tugging at the out of date vest in order to prove his point. It's at that moment that Kaito realizes that Yuma only uses one glove…something even Kaito did in his youth, when he insisted on always wearing the same two coats and tight leggings.

Most of all, Yuma's glove is in the opposite hand he used to wear his. Meaning, if they had met back then (since as it turns out, their actual age gap isn't bigger than five years. Go figure.), it would have been so perfect to hold hands, and really, just how foolishly romantic is that? What are the odds?

Too bad they had met when their story was already an impossible one. Which might be why Yuma is insisting on this 'Kaito is also a ghost' thing. He still wants them to match and honestly…part of Kaito wants that too.

But he knows it's just a silly wish. Of course.

"You also never ate any of my food, despite spending the entire night at my place. I can tell from your attitude alone that you're the big eater type, yet nothing? No matter how much you hate frozen and junk food, that does not add up." he continues as he lets go of the other, moving on to the second biggest matter, "And lastly, when we kissed that one time…"

Yuma blushes ever so cutely at that. It should be criminal for a dead phantom to be this adorable. It also makes Kaito realize that, if Yuma and Ryouga never went out, he might have been Yuma's first kiss after all…

But dwelling on such happy things only makes this so much harder, so he puts a break to that out of necessity, "I felt like the whole world was….glitching out all around us, for the lack of a better expression. I was too lost in the joy to dwell on it at that time, but later on, when I put it all together, I realized what it was." he admits rather sadly, and for once, he doesn't care if it shows on his face, "Us being able to touch is Earth's very own glitch."

Yuma flinches back just a little. "That…"

And for a moment, Kaito hopes that he's realized the truth. That they can spend their sure to be last moments together in a more pleasant way.

But Yuma dashes those hopes the next time he opens his mouth, "You noticed all that, and yet, you don't see how that all applies to you too?"

That is not what Kaito wanted at all. To circle back to where this all started. " . .about." he scoffs, unable to keep the frustration out of his tone.

"For starters, isn't it weird that you could always see and touch me with no issues?" Yuma points out almost innocently, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, "Shark couldn't see me at all. No matter how much I tried…all I could do was give him back the key. And he was greatly attached to me in life…you'd think he'd be able to sense me over a total stranger."

Kaito's head begins to throb ever so slightly.

"There are several things that don't make sense here. How you could touch your key, for one." he tries to deflect, "And maybe I just have some sort of affinity for the supernatural that your friend doesn't. Never watched those ghost hunting shows?" he asks, almost sarcastically.

Yuma just lets out a tiny sigh, "Alright…how about the fact you too have been wearing the same clothes since the day I met you? And for all you judge me for never eating, I never see you do it either."

His own eyes widen as he realizes that…that is true. When Yuma had denied food, Kaito had shrugged and not eaten anything either, because he figured his own body would warn him when he needed sustenance.

But that doesn't have to mean anything, "I eat every day before I go see you."

"Are you sure?" Yuma asks simply, "Because your coffee mug that afternoon? Was completely empty. That's why you didn't dirty anything when you waved it all over the place."

Another pause as he remembers that fact.

But no…that is ridiculou—

"Remember one of our first meetings? Where you were insisting I eat the noodles you were giving me?" Yuma interrupts his thoughts with a rather weak voice, "You weren't holding anything. That's why I was acting so awkwardly. And why you never found the container I 'lost' either…there was nothing there in the first place." he says as he rubs his shoulder, biting his lip, "I just thought, you obviously were going through some mental stuff, so it was best not to point it out…"

They never did find that container…

No! Yuma likely just threw it into the ocean with shock when he found Kaito fainted, and now doesn't recall it. Yes, that must be it…it must be it, or his head will hurt more…

"I shower and change clothes every day. You must be blind." he grunts, leaving out the fact he sometimes went to sleep in his day clothes because he genuinely forgot.

The other remains firm, "Then describe to me what you're wearing right now."

And Kaito just groans in sheer frustration, "Brown suspenders with a pink button-up shirt. It's an outfit I've had since my teens, that my ex somehow didn't manage to throw out." he plays along, spreading his arms wide open, "Are we going to play 'I spy' now, is that it?"

"Really?" Yuma shakes his head incredulously, "Then why have I never seen you in anything but that black coat and tight leggings?" he says, pointing at Kaito.

By reflex, he follows Yuma's pointing, and sure enough, Kaito is wearing the outfit he's had from childhood..with sleeves pulled up to his elbows. "What?" he gasps out incredulously.

Taking a deep breath, Yuma stares him head on, "It's mostly black, with blue sleeves, red on the inside, has a comically oversized collar, and some touches of green here and there." he lists off, "Your little boots match too."

Kaito's mouth hangs open. He's sure he's never worn that outfit in front of Yuma. He certainly isn't wearing it now. But he must have done so, and not remember, because Yuma just described it with enough detail that it's impossible for him to have guessed.

"You're insane! Why would I ever wear a coat in this weather?!" he points out hysterically, subconsciously putting more distance between himself and the other, "Besides, I only don that old coat nowadays when it rains—!"

He freezes on the spot.

The last time it rained was…

On the night he moved in here.

"Niisan, don't you hear tha—"

He almost falls to the ground, head throbbing to the point it feels like it's going to explode, "Ahhh!"

Yuma immediately rushes to his side, and cradles him to his chest, "It's okay, it's okay." he coos, "It hurts, I know it does. But the more you fight it, the worse it is. Just let it come…"

A bright flash. The sound of tires breaking through the road desperately. His head hitting against something, his phone going silent, pain overwhelming him…

"Niisan? Niisan!"

"No…no…no…" he cries desperately.

"It's okay. It's okay." Yuma keeps trying to comfort him.

But the pain, along with desperation, makes him want none of that. He pushes the other away, scrambling to hold himself nuts, "You are insane. How about the fact Ryouga could see me, but not you? Explain that?" he cries, even though his mind flashes to how he had to snap his fingers in front of the delinquent in order for him to take note of him…"You can't handle the realization of what happened, and are now pushing it onto me." he rambles on so fast he's almost unintelligible, "I am ill, and you are seeing things that are not the—"

As he accidentally waves his arms around, he suddenly feels much heavier. There's a sturdy weight from his right side.

Startled, he stops his ramblings to look down—

And he's wearing his old coat. "W-what?"

Yuma just stares at him silently.

Believing he's hallucinating, he paws at himself, wanting confirmation he's just seeing things. Instead, his hand wanders to where most of the weight is coming from; his pocket.

And pulls out something he had long ago forgotten. A black box.

Inside it is…

The small headache suddenly intensifies, to the point he feels himself fall over as his eyes roll to the back of his head.

"Kaito!" is the last thing he hears as his conscience fades away.