Last time on "Dead Blonde Skank":
"Mione. Wait" It was Ron, he was panting.
"Yes?"
"Would you like to go out tomorrow?"
"Oh…yeah. Ok, I'll call you" This time I was the one who give the kiss. Courtesy kiss.
He blushed. "Ok bye!"
The animals started cheering again.
Oh, this is going to be a long day!!
_________________________)*)_____________________________
It was getting late. I still had to go to the church to meet with the priest. Maybe he knew something. Oh hell! Ginny was at home alone with a crisis. I'm so exhausted I just want to go home and crawl into my bed. Or maybe I'll take Malfoy's appointment at the spa…
I reached the church. It looked really creepy at night. Dead Jesus, some guy with bloody hands, freaky paintings. As I entered, I saw a shadow walking by. I bit nails to the mere thought of the unknown. Gryffindor bravery my arse! I just my want to get out of here! The shadow kept getting closer…and closer…and closer until…
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" I screamed. I couldn't hold it anymore.
"Gave you a fright my child?" A young looking man told me.
No shit father.
"Yes father." I couldn't see his face in the dark. But that voice…that peculiar voice…
"Well, why brings you here?"
"LONGBOTTOM!" I yelled. I knew that voice was familiar. But…why the hell is Neville a priest?
"Oh you know me?"
"Yes! It's Hermione Granger from Hogwarts!"
Silence.
Could this guy be so thick? We just recently graduated, and already forgot his classmates.
"OI, Hermione!!! How are you doing? I seem to have problems on remembering things recently!"
"Well, I'm ok. I want this to be brief. Just 2 questions ok?" I explain this as if he was a kindergarten boy.
"Ok, go on."
"What did you do yesterday?"
"Oh me? Well, to tell you the truth I don't remember!"
What?! He doesn't remember what he did last night? Don't even bother to push it.
"And the second question?"
This he remembers.
"Why are you a priest?" I asked honestly.
"You see, this is not a normal muggle church. This is a Wizards Who Believe in Jesus Congregation. When I left Hogwarts, I was so empty, and I wanted to find something. And I found Jesus."
"Great, good for you. Don't you remember anything? Not even a blonde guy who came in around non-mass hours?"
"Errr…no."
"Ok well gotta go!"
"Are you looking for something Hermione?"
"More like someone" I replied truthfully as I exited the church.
"Maybe it's Jesus!!!" He shouted back.
"I highly doubt so." I replied to myself.
It's just the first day of research. It usually takes weeks to gather all evidence all come up with an answer. It was the first day of research, and I already have a list of suspects.
The main one is possibly Pansy Parkinson. Devoted fiancé and then…puff! She finds Malfoy with another woman, and tells him she would make sure he doesn't see her again. Isn't that incriminating?
The other suspect is Neville. I mean, the guy made Neville's staying at Hogwarts a living hell. Like most criminals, he returned to the crime scene later on, and uses the same excuse "I don't remember." Plus, he's a priest, everyone believes priests are saints!
I don't stop there. I think maybe Ron could do it. What was the whole "you crazy-ferret-fucker" thing? He loved calling Malfoy a ferret. And not only that but with Malfoy's death he could sneak Harry into the team and make himself Captain.
And there's Harry. Why was he so nervous? Shouldn't he be a little relieved? A Malfoy less in his back. An easier way to get to Voldemort. He looked like one of those people who think they are constantly watched. He was looking to all sides, like a madman. He looked kind of guilty.
And finally, Seamus. He looked extremely happy. Oh and what he said: "Hermione did you really heard? Malfoy's dead! Isn't that great! That asshole, he deserved that and much more…" And his psycho laugh "hahahahaha". Maybe he had a scarf that day and choked him with that, because he's really good at choking.
But then again, why didn't Malfoy use his wand in self-defence? He was good at duelling so I don't understand it. Oh fuck it.
At this point, I'm beyond tired. I should just put a piece of carton in the floor and sleep on it in the streets. I have black circles under my eyes due lack of sleeping. Maybe that mug of coffee I thought about would do me good.
OH SHIT! I didn't thought of it I have a date with Pansy and Ron the same day! What the hell I'm gonna do!
COFFEE…COFFEE…COFFEE…COFFEE
I pulled my pants off the same time as I was driving. They were starting to piss me off. So I was left in a tight black tee and my black knickers. Thank Merlin I decided not to wear grannies today.
There it was. A café. Oh hail the person who invented coffee!
COFFEE…COFFEE…COFFEE…COFFEE
This was beyond desire…this was lust. Lust for coffee. I threw on my cloak and closed it so no one would see I was in my knickers. I quickly entered the café, ordered a tall black and left like a bolt of lightning. What luck. It started raining. Hard. As I hurried to the car, I felt my cloak started swinging behind me. I looked back, hoping it wasn't damp with the new found rain. It wasn't just damp, IT WAS SOAKED. MY NEW CLOAK! SHIT! I tighten my grip to the only possession left, a mug of black coffee. As I looked forward, something odd happens…
CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WE ARE SERIOUSLY NOT LEAVING IT THERE.
My new steaming BLACK COFFEE has been poured in my shirt. And somebody is on top of me…
A/N: CLIFFHANGER!!! MATE, SOLVED THE MYSTERY ALREADY? IS IT PANSY? IS IT POTTY? IS IT OUR BROTHER? FINNEGAN OR IS IT NEVILLE AND THE TOAD? FIND OUT IN THE NEXT CHAPTER OF "DEAD BLONDE SKANK"!!!
To the people that just, plainly and simply…ROCK:
LoLiTA*~!: Our first reviewer ever!!! Congradulations, you just won yourself a sloppy snob. And well, it'll be our pleasure to shag you.
fUCK!NG MAGIcaL Me!:
FRED: Your name is really cool!
GEORGE: Now, now, you have to wait to the next chapter to know who killed Malfoy!
GameOfLove:
FRED: Not for kiss-assing proposes, but we love you fic!
GEORGE: And yes, Draco can burn in hell for all we care!
PassionPolice237:
FRED: Percy…that's really an evil name if you ask me.
GEORGE: But then why isn't Voldie named Percy?
FRED: Because he isn't evil enough.
GEORGE: Oh. Well, glad you like it!
RoBi darkO cOrNeLio RoSa:
FRED: We just want to make a parenthesis here, but…
GEORGE: WE DIDN'T KNEW THAT SOMEONE ACTUALLY LISTENED TO Robi Draco Rosa!!! He's like, the coolest guy ever!
FRED: You sound gay mate.
some1:
FRED: That's like an enigma.
GEORGE: Who in fuck's name killed Malfoy? That was a good title. Hey, review again won't you!
Atellix:
FRED: Hermione kicks arse.
GEORGE: Yeah, she's all Sherlock Holmes by now.
Neveada:
FRED: You are one hell of a clever reader.
GEORGE: No one notices how odd was Ginny acting or what effect it could have on the story, so we'll leave it there for you. Hope you can resolve the mystery. You're clever!
Katvirgo:
FRED: You'll beta for us? *pleads with puppy-dog eyes*
GEORGE: You're the best! We'll e-mail you soon so we can talk. *winks*