Chapter Fourteen: The Hogwarts Express

Hermione and Malcolm looked at their tickets. It was clearly up to them because Hermione's parents had no clue as to how to find Platform Nine and 3/4.

"There must be a simple trick to it," Hermione said. "Otherwise, everyone would know where it is."

"It is simple," Malcolm explained. "If you know how to think like a wizard." He looked at Hermione. "Or a witch." When she gave him a look, he added, "You know what I mean."

It's great. I can call her that and get away with it.

"Yes, I do," Hermione said frostily.

"The twins are starting again," someone said from behind them.

"Mum," Hermione said with annoyance. "We are not starting. He is."

"I told you," Mrs. Granger said.

"We should ask someone," Hermione said with authority.

"Like who?" Malcolm asked unhelpfully.

"Like whom," Hermione said courteously. "Like someone who would be in a position to know."

"And they were doing so well," Mr. Granger commented.

Hermione and Malcolm paused to smirk at each other. Malcolm's eyes flashed as an older boy walked by, pushing a cart. Hermione followed his gaze to see a group of redheads, all pushing carts. "Brilliant," Hermione said. "That one boy has an owl. It can only mean one thing."

"He has a permit to keep wildlife," Malcolm said firmly.

As Mr. And Mrs. Granger prepared for another round of name calling, Hermione turned to Malcolm. "Exactly, and if we follow him we can find out where the wild things are."

Mrs. Granger shook her head. "I always regretted not having more children. Now I'm regretting I didn't have less."

"Hermione," Malcolm said as he pointed to the boy he had spotted. The boy was walking directly toward a pillar, and then disappeared. The second boy was following his brother. "They're getting away."

The two children pushed their carts quickly as the two adults tried to follow. As they came close, there was only one boy with a cart left. "Excuse me," Hermione called, and the boy, his mother and his sister all looked up.

"Yes, dears," the woman said.

"Hi, I'm Malcolm and this is Hermione. We're trying to get to the Hogwarts Express," Malcolm said breathlessly.

"And you want to know how to get to the Platform?" The woman smiled at them. "The two of you must be first years. This is Ron's first year too. And are these your parents?" The woman held out her hand. "Nice to meet you. Molly Weasley."

The Grangers introduced themselves.

"You must be proud of your twins. Both going to school. My twins have already gone through. They're both boys."

Hermione interrupted. "But we're not . . ."

" . . . both boys," Malcolm finished with a smirk as Mrs. Granger rolled her eyes and whispered something to Mrs. Weasley, who laughed.

"Then why do you talk funny," the girl asked Malcolm.

"Now, Ginny," Mrs. Weasley said.

"He does it to show off," Hermione answered. "Personally, I don't think he sounds American at all."

"It isn't very good," Ginny admitted.

Okay, one point for me for running with the twins idea. One point to Hermione for mocking the way I talk.

"You will have to excuse them," Mr. Granger said suddenly. "They've been so excited about the school. Now, Malcolm, if you are not going to talk properly, don't say anything at all. And Hermione. Don't tease your brother."

"But, Dad . . ."

Hermione stopped as she saw her father smirking at her.

"Ron," Molly Weasley said, "Show them how it's done."

Ron nodded and pushed his cart toward the secret entrance, and disappeared as his brothers had done.

"Now which one of you first?" Mrs. Weasley asked, then grinned. "It's a good thing you are a boy and a girl. I swear you look so much alike. Malcolm, why don't you let your sister go first?"

"Sure," Malcolm said.

"We don't look alike," Hermione said in surprise.

"They definitely act alike," Mrs. Granger said.

"MOM?"

"Hermione. Train. NOW."

Hermione huffed, then pushed her cart to the hidden platform.

Malcolm smirked at Mrs. Weasley. "You know, don't you?"

"Your mother let me in on the joke. And Malcolm, you're accent IS terrible."

"I'll practice on it. Thanks for helping us. Goddbye Mr. G, Mrs. G."

Hogwarts Express. Here I come.

Malcolm and Hermione managed to get a compartment by themselves, and Hermione couldn't stop grinning.

"Malcolm, that was the most fun I've ever had. I was already on the platform before I figured out that Mrs. Weasley knew the truth, although I have no idea how."

"Your mom tipped her off while you were complaining about my accent." He grinned. "I guess we were getting on their nerves."

"But it was so much fun. I've never done anything like that before."

"You never goofed on people?"

"Goofed? Do you mean deliberately lying to try and embarrass someone? No. Of course not. I'm not that type of person." Hermione widened her grin. "At least I wasn't, before I met you, dear brother."

Malcolm paused. "That kid, Ron."

"What about him?"

"Did you tell him the truth?"

"I was going to," Hermione admitted. "But I didn't want to tell him I lied. I suppose I should have."

"He told his brothers. When they helped us find this compartment, one of them wished me and my sister the best of luck."

They were both laughing when the door from the corridor opened. It was Ron Weasley, and he looked at them nervously. "Um, could I join you? Everywhere else is full."

"We'd be delighted," Hermione said politely.

"Thanks," Ron said gratefully and pulled his trunk in. They helped him store it and Ron sat down next to Malcolm."

The compartment opened again, and twin boys stuck their heads in. "Hi," one of the twins said, "We're Fred and George and this is our brother, Ron. Sorry we didn't introduce ourselves before. Ron, do you want to join us? Lee Jordan brought a Tarantula with him. He's going to let us hold it."

Ron looked up nervously. "That's all right. I'll stay here."

"Right then. We're off."

"Never liked spiders," Ron said.

"Most of them are harmless," Hermione assured him.

"Most," Ron agreed, then changed the subject. "So, both of you are muggle-born?"

Hermione answered, "No," and Malcolm shook his head. "We are?" And Malcolm nodded.

"No, you are?" Ron asked.

Malcolm pulled out a pen and a piece of paper and wrote quickly, then handed Hermione a note. Hermione read it and nodded. "Sorry," she apologized, "I'm still nervous. My parents are muggles. Both of them. Are you parents wizards?"

"Yeah," Ron said carefully, confused by what was going on. Hermione and Malcolm kept giving each other strange looks. "Maybe I should find someplace else to sit. You two look like you need to talk."

"He's right," Hermione said to Malcolm. "Everyone will know sooner or later. Ronald will be a perfect test subject."

"It's been nice talking to you," Ron said as he stood up.

Malcolm and Hermione ignored him as Malcolm frowned. "Then they'll ask me about it. I don't remember anything."

This is stupid. It's like the Krelboyne's all over again. Everyone will find out I'm special and I'll be stuck hanging out with losers again.

"Hagrid knows," Hermione pointed out. "Do you think he kept it a secret?"

Ron paused with the door half open. The conversation was becoming interesting. "Hagrid's the groundskeeper at Hogwarts. How do you two know him?"

"He delivered my letter," Malcolm said.

"Personally?" Ron asked. "That is unusual. My letter came by owl."

"So did mine," Hermione said.

"Then why did they hand deliver your brother's letter."

"Malcolm, do you want to answer Ron?"

"Hermione isn't my sister," Malcolm admitted. "I said that to try and embarrass her. She and her mother met me at the airport."

Ron nodded and smiled. "And you talk funny because you ARE a Yank?"

I think I hate this kid already.

"You're in trouble with your joke, by the way," Ron added. "I told Fred and George, and you didn't correct them. They pointed you out to their friends. By now half the train knows about you two."

"Why would they care?" Malcolm asked snidely.

Ron smirked as he revealed the joke. "You two are twins, and both of you can do magic, and both of you are muggle-born. Do you know how rare that is?"

Malcolm paused as he thought it through. Okay. Nobody knows yet that I'm the Boy-Who-Lived. They won't ignore me for that reason. But they will want to talk to me because I'm a fraternal twin. Which I'm not. And only three people on this train know the truth.

"Ron, what will happen when everyone finds out the truth?"

"You'll become a laughingstock." Ron said with authority.

"Even though you spread that lie?"

"I only told Fred and George." Ron admitted.

"It doesn't matter," Hermione said. "Once they find out the truth about you, Malcolm, I think they'll forget about it."

"That you're a Yank?" Ron asked, then smiled. "You talked to Fred, didn't you, Malcolm?"

"How can you tell?"

"That's my excuse," Ron said proudly. "I was obviously lying to them. And they should have known it."

"Hooray," Malcolm said cheerlessly. "That isn't what we're talking about."

"It is what we're talking about," Hermione pointed out. "What you mean to say is that it is not what we should be talking about."

"Maybe we shouldn't bother," Malcolm replied. "They'll think I'm lying, anyway."

"About what?" Ron asked.

Ron watched as Malcolm and Hermione began exchanging looks. It was obvious that something was up. "Look, I don't know what's going on but if you want to tell me something I'll promise to keep it a secret."

Hermione gave Malcolm a hard stare. "It's about the Boy-Who-Lived."

Ron nodded. "I heard he was supposed to be coming to Hogwarts this year. What about him." He paused. "The two of you know him?"

"Yes," both of them said.

"What's he like?"

"He's extremely obnoxious," Hermione answered.

"That's the pot calling the kettle black," Malcolm retorted, slapping the seat beside him for emphasis. A loud squeak was heard as Ron suddenly rushed towards Malcolm.

"You almost hit Scabbers," Ron yelled as he picked up his rat.

"Sorry," Malcolm said insincerely. "I didn't even know he was there."

"He doesn't make much noise," Ron admitted sadly. "He mostly sleeps. He's pathetic, really. Percy gave him to me."

"I am sorry I almost smashed your rat," Malcolm admitted.

I think he would have liked it if I did.

"Ron," Hermione asked. "Could we get back to the subject."

"I guess," Ron said. "There's no reason to talk about Scabbers."

"Exactly," Hermione replied. "Malcolm and I have something to tell you, and it is important."

"About the Boy-Who-Lived?"

"Exactly," Malcolm said in an almost perfect imitation of Hermione.

Ron paused. "Were you pretending to talk with an accent?"

Malcolm nodded.

"Then you two really are twins, and this Yank stuff was a joke?"

"No," Hermione said with a frown.

"Yes," Malcolm said with a smirk.

"Excuse me," a boy said from the doorway. "I've lost Trevor, my toad. Have you seen him?"

"Would you like a rat instead," Malcolm asked, pointing to Scabbers.

"No," Ron said angrily.

"I'm only joking," Malcolm complained. "You said he was pathetic."

"He's still mine," Ron insisted. "And you're talking in that stupid accent again."

"I've done accents," the boy at the door said to Malcolm, "but you should end every sentence with 'Eh.' That way everyone knows it's an accent."

"Um, Right," Malcolm said with an accent.

"He isn't very good," Ron said and introduced himself.

"Neville," the boy said, "Neville Longbottom."

"And these two are Malcolm and Hermione Granger," Ron said with resignation, adding in a whisper, "I picked the wrong compartment to sit in."

Neville laughed.. "You're the ones everyone is talking about. Are you really twins? And muggles to boot?"

Malcolm and Hermione looked at each other, and laughed.

"That's right," Malcolm said, remembering his accent.

"Not really," Hermione responded, then smirked. "I suppose we are."

"Nor exactly." Malcolm replied, and they both laughed again.

"Stop," Ron said. "You keep doing that. Either you are twins or you aren't."

"I suppose we should be completely honest," Hermione said with a smirk. "We aren't twins at all. Malcolm is adopted."

"Which explains why I'm two months older," Malcolm added with a smile.

"You're doing that stupid accent again," Neville pointed out.

"It's not an accent."

"But," Neville was clearly confused, "you aren't a Yank?"

Malcolm took a serious tone. "I was born over here, but I was sent to the States after my parents died." Then he brushed the hair from his forehead.

"Criminy," Ron said in surprise. "You have the scar. You're Harry . . ."

"My American parents changed my name when they adopted me."

Neville was still confused. "Then why does your sister talk like a normal person?"

"She doesn't," Malcolm said with a smirk. "SHE'S faking the accent."

"She's very good."

Neville couldn't keep a straight face after everyone gave him a look of surprise. He started laughing when Malcolm said, "Um, Neville . . ."

That was good. After everything we said to him, he turned it back on us.

"Malcolm, why did they change your name?"

"It's because of my Uncle Harry. He's such a jerk. There was this family, the Feltons, they named their kid Harry. Then they met my uncle. The next day they changed the kid's name to Tom. Really, it's a true story."

"We believe you."

A/N: It's Christmas Eve and I'm in a rush. I'll see you again on Boxing Day. Have a Happy.