The rest of their trip was relatively uneventful. At least, neither of them managed to set anything on fire. Around midnight, they had decided to stop at yet another rest stop. This one was smaller than the last. No pop or candy machines, not even a bathroom with indoor plumbing. A single light illuminated the small parking lot. In the small space allotted, there stood four picnic tables with grills and in the far corner a pair of outdoor johns. Rinoa shuddered at the thought of having to use them at some point. But there was no choice. This was the last rest stop for another hundred miles, and they had to pull off.
They'd been driving for twelve hours straight, only stopping for ten minutes here and there. Both of them were beyond exhausted. They'd made it through a major portion of the mountains that was at least one thing they'd managed to do right. One more horrible twelve-hour drive and they'd be at the prison. It seemed so simple and at the same time very daunting.
Rinoa parked the car, relieved to finally be pulling the key out of the ignition. She sat for a moment, listening to the clicks in the engine as it cooled. Irvine had been asleep, and woke slowly; keen SeeD senses noticing that they were no longer moving.
"Mmmm. Stopping for the night?" he drawled, she nodded in silent reply. He laughed a little as he stretched, "Funny. I'm not really sleepy."
"I told you not to take a nap. Though, I'm not all that tired either."
Irvine opened the car door, looking out over the rest stop, "Hey, follow me."
"What?" Rinoa looked at him with confusion as he exited the car. She shrugged, cocking her head as she watched him make his way into the park. He stopped and glanced back at her, giving her a wave to follow.
"C'mere. I wanna show you something."
Rinoa hesitantly jogged up to meet him, "Depends on what it is."
"It's not like that!! Freakin' A! You're paranoid as hell. Knock it off." He answered, his brow furrowed, "When I can't sleep, I like to go out and look at the stars. I pick out the constellations....it's really relaxing."
Irvine led her to a small overlook, where the sky could be easily seen without the cover of trees. He flopped onto the ground, spreading arms and legs wide. Smiling, he motioned for her to do the same. Rinoa sighed deeply and rolled her eyes, and reluctantly lay down near him. Looking towards the night sky, her eyes took in the stars. They sparkled brightly in the deep blue sky without the glaring light of the city to compete with. She sighed again, this time with contentment. The stars had never been this clear for her. Irvine tapped her on the shoulder and pointed to a cluster of stars.
"Okay...Look up there....see the stars that kinda form a cross?" He asked, his finger moving over the stars indicated.
Rinoa squinted and searched the sky, it took her a few moments but she found it. "Yeah...."
"That's Apodis the dove. According to legend, Apodis was so overjoyed at Hyne's defeat, that he decided to proclaim it to the earth and the sky. So he flew without stopping for an entire year. Telling both god and man about the demon's death. At the end of that year, he was so tired that he fell down and died. The gods, in thanks for his hard work, lifted his body and set Apodis in the sky. So that all would remember his dedication."
"Wow... what about those....the three bright ones."
"Hmm.... That's the first sorceress, Vega..." he talked as he pointed out the stars, outlining them with his finger, "...and the other group of stars is the first knight, Deneb. The two constellations together are called the Erasmiades. It's said they shared a great love for each other, and that it had been the key to defeating Hyne. Their devotion was so strong that neither could live without the other. She gave him the strength to fight and he protected her spirit. But in the battle, Deneb was mortally wounded, leaving Vega grief-stricken. She died of a broken heart, still holding Deneb in her arms. The gods were so touched, that they gave them a place in the sky forever."
Rinoa thought for a moment, a feeling of sorrow at the loss of some unknown connection that she only just became aware of. "That's incredibly sad. Are you trying to depress me?"
"No."
"Well, you're doing a marvelous job."
"Sorry. I'll change the subject...." He paused to look over at her, noticing her face relax a little, "So what makes you think I like Selphie?"
"Besides the fact that you said so?"
"No I didn't. I just hinted I MIGHT like her. Never said I did. You just assumed...and when you assume..."
Rinoa rolled her eyes, "You make an ass out of you and me....yeah, yeah, yeah...."
"So, what makes you think that?"
"The way you talk about her....not to mention the fact that you've been blithering on about her non-stop for nearly twelve hours....and the whole time you make this funny little face. Plus, the corners of your mouth twitch when I say her name."
Irvine scowled, "What face? What twitch? You're talkin' crazy, Woman!!"
"Selphie." She said, peering at him with eyes sparkling. The corner of his mouth twitched and he clapped a hand over it.
"That's only because you said something....not because I like her." He snapped, giving her a look of disgust and jabbing his finger at her.
"Liar. Just admit it already. I saw the way you looked at her over my father's. You can't hide that kind of stuff from me."
Irvine sighed, looking up at the night sky for solace, "Fine. I like her. I..." he stopped, and thought briefly about telling her his secret. The one he promised himself he'd never tell any of them. No, I can't. She wouldn't understand.... deep blue eyes softening with self-imposed solitude. "It's just.... She reminds me of my first crush. A long time ago."
"That's....that's the sweetest thing I think I've ever heard come out of your head." Rinoa replied quietly, her mostly negative opinion of the sharpshooter changing just a little, "You know. I take back all the mean things I've ever said about you. Okay, not all of them, but some."
"Thanks, I think. You know. The story of Vega and Deneb....It reminds me of something...." Irvine began, wondering how to approach his next rather uncomfortable turn of subject.
"What?"
"Remember what I said earlier? About you not having fun anymore. I....I'm just worried about you, Rinoa. I know we're not best friends. Hell, I've only know you a month...but.... You have this hard shell you put on. Even now, you try and act so strong, but you're not really. I just want to make sure you're okay. Because you haven't talked much about what happened. So....if you need to talk...I'm here. I just don't want you to throw your life away, like in the story...that's all."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You loved him."
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Now who's the liar?! You're not the only one who sees things! You loved Squall. And when he died, something inside you died with him. It's scary. And as a friend, I just want to make sure you're okay. I don't want you to give up on life."
Vincent's words echoed back to her, with sudden frightening repercussions. That connection she'd pushed back in her mind burst forward. She had been blinded by the subtle tricks of her own mind. Becoming the serious princess, the haughty leader who only wanted to get things done. Who yelled and cursed and threw fits, till everything went the way she wanted it. It was the Forest Owls all over again. The walls she had started to tear down, slowly rebuilding themselves while she remained unaware. She'd become cold and hard again, like her father had after he mother's death.
"Oh god....I've become my father...." Rinoa whispered, wrapping her arms around herself and stuffing her hands into the inner lining of Squall's coat.
Her fingers stumbling upon the hidden pocket, and drawing out what lay concealed within. A picture, it was a picture. The white backing of the photo greeting her as she held it aloft. She turned it over and gasped when she saw what it was of. Irvine had been looking at the sky, giving Rinoa a moment to contemplate the weight of his words. He could only hope she would listen. He glanced over at her, her quivering form illuminated by sharp moonlight. She was crying again.
"Fuck....I'm sorry....I didn't mean to make you cry.....Aw! CRAP! Please stop...I'm sorry..." He said hurriedly, grimacing at his own stupid manlike reaction. Usually he was better at this kind of thing, but she'd caught him off guard.
Rinoa sniffled, gently fingering the picture, she handed it to him without a word. Irvine took it, nodding somberly. It was one of Selphie's pictures taken at the Grable building. A rather lovely close up of Rinoa that Squall must have saved. I knew it! Irvine thought in bittersweet triumph. No, he'd known long before that. Rinoa claimed to be so adept at reading people, but she hadn't seen then what he had. She'd never known until this moment. That first day Irvine had met all of them; he knew there was something between Squall and Rinoa. An undeniable connection, that both of them seemed to be completely blind to. Now it was gone.
He put an arm around her as he had countless times in the last few weeks. Feeling so damn guilty. It should have been Squall, the one who saved this picture, doing the comforting. Not me.... If only I had shot sooner....dammit all to hell. He gave the picture back to Rinoa, and put his best foot forward.
"You know.... he wouldn't want this. He'd call it a waste of time, and then he'd get mad at you and tell you to focus on the mission."
"Then he'd add a whatever in there, for the full surround sound Squall experience..." She said with a slight laugh, wiping away the tears, "You're right. I know you're right. About all of it. I've been avoiding the reality of it, because I'm scared. But you should have seen the look Quistis gave me. She blames me, I just know it. They all will. How can I face them?"
"Don't be silly. You weren't the one who....it wasn't your fault. Accidents like this happen. And Quistis hardly blames you. If it hadn't been for her, you'd be in prison too and then where would I be?"
"Back at Galbadia Garden, hip deep in women...."
"Well, now that you put it that way...."
She socked him on the arm, "Butt-hole."
"Hey, you said it not me!! Hit yourself!"
Rinoa merely smiled sweetly in response, tucking away the picture and laying back to gaze at the stars. "So what's that one called?" She asked, pointing at another grouping of stars.
Irvine flopped on his back, contemplating her question for a moment before he launched into his next explanation. The heavens watched in silent communion, celestial bodies glinting and dancing in anticipation of the reunions ahead.
Rinoa sighed contentedly, sprawling arms and legs wide as she lay in her Eden. Gazing up at the softly bobbing heads of the flowers above her. The field rippling as a silent breeze tumbled over it. The only sound was the rhythmic swish of the nearby ocean, and the occasional sea bird's lonely call. Once again, Rinoa found herself waiting for her knight. At the moment, she didn't mind, she could stay here forever and not mind. Though through experience, she knew that this dream would fade as it had before. It'd end up in the same place it always did. Pain. Death. Apocalypse. Rinoa frowned, it had been awhile since she was last here and she was loath to give up the good part of the dream. Dreams don't last forever....they are, after all, dreams.
She closed her eyes tightly; trying to will the darkness away despite the fact that she knew it was fruitless. Balling her fist, she hit the ground in sheer frustration. She was tired of being helpless against the coming darkness. Most of all, she was tired of just waiting. If he wouldn't come to her by god she'd come to him. Rinoa stood up suddenly, eyes snapping open forcefully, full of determination. She took off running as fast as she could through the rustling field, the storm following rapidly on her heels.
Streaks of green and gold flying by her as she ran faster and faster. In her own mind, never seeming to go fast enough. As if she was running on a treadmill, her feet unable to find sufficient purchase. Gradually, the field did disappear, the scenery slowly changing. Grass and flowers dying off slowly, withering as if burned by some internal fire, the one peaceful scenery swathed in a dusky gray mist. The ground was cracked and dry, her footfalls sending up puffs of silent dirt. She was in the wasteland, a strange no-where place, without time or hope. The storm now surrounded her as if waiting to see what she would do. Rinoa stopped and looked around. She'd been here before. In the middle of the desert was a gunblade buried deep in the earth. Ecce....
Rinoa gasped for air, feeling tears form in her eyes. She choked them back, calling out Squall's name desperately. This wasn't the normal course of the dream. This was new, unexpected and moreover, downright disturbing. I'm waiting....I'll be here, so if you look for me..... His voice called back to her, Rinoa became more desperate.
"WAIT!! WHERE ARE YOU!? I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!" She shouted, waiting quietly for the reply.
His voice whispered slowly, sounding near and faraway at the same time...I'll be waiting. In our field, I promise. Looking for the source, She aimlessly wandered around the area near the gunblade, calling out Squall's name. For what seemed like hours she did this. Her voice tiring, her throat as thirsty and dry as the wasteland itself. Tears streaking her dirty cheeks. Why couldn't she find him? Rinoa abruptly erupted into a coughing fit, her throat was choked with dust and could take no more. Rasping huskily, the coughs racked her body, the force of it driving her to her knees. Coughing turned to retching. Screaming as she puked out black bile from her nose, eyes and mouth. Insontis vite....
Irvine had been having a rather nice dream. It involved at least a dozen nubile co-eds, all of them naked in an overlarge hot tub. He was about rub some oil on one of his new girlfriends when his dream was interrupted by a piercing scream. Jolting awake, he sat up and looked at Rinoa as she flailed on the dew-covered grass. She was having a nightmare of some sort and from the looks of it a real loo-loo.
Her face was sticky with dry tears, face contorted in pain as she moaned and struggled with whatever visions were tormenting her. Irvine sighed deeply, it had become so hard to hold Rinoa up and he was very tired. It seemed she never got any better, the pain only worsening with every step towards their goal. Perhaps it would have been better if he'd left her behind. She'd never stand for it and you know it. He thought with a weary grin. Irvine gently shook her shoulder, and waited as she awoke.
She gasped and bolted upright, eyes wide with fear. It took a few moments for her to adjust to her surroundings and remember where she was. They'd fallen asleep in the field after talking about stars nearly the entire night. Shakily she rubbed her face, bleary looking over at Irvine.
"Nightmares?"
She simply nodded; she still wasn't one hundred percent awake.
"Wanna talk about it?" Irvine asked, expecting her to answer no.
Another shake of the head, "....It's all jumbled. Hard to explain. Maybe later. Tired now."
Irvine smiled, "It's about him, wasn't it? You know, sooner or later you will have to talk about it. It's eating you up inside. Hell, it's eating me up"
"I-I can't...."
"Rin, it's not like I wasn't there. Not like I don't blame myself for what happened. If only I'd shot sooner..." Irvine sighed in frustration, his face struggling with emotion, ".... None of us would be here. But we are. Talk to me."
Rinoa looked at the cowboy warily as he looked at her with earnestness. Trust him. Siren whispered from within. Why should I? she hissed back. People are more than the sum of their parts, my dear and wisdom does not often come from the most obvious source. You must shake your burden; he will bear it for a time.... Rinoa frowned; annoyed that Siren chose to speak in riddles rather than telling her plainly what she meant. She knew enough not to ask, Siren seemed to like answering questions with more questions. Rinoa was not in the mood.
"At the parade... Something happened." She looked down, finding it difficult to come up with the words, "I didn't tell you exactly everything that happened. I think there's something wrong with me."
Irvine looked at her doubtfully, "Like what?"
"I don't know how to explain it. Squall and Seifer were fighting.... I saw the sorceress and this feeling overcame me. My whole body felt lighter, everything was on fire. I reached out my hand and there was a flame...there shouldn't have been. I wasn't junctioned...It just came out of nowhere. So I just stared at it, amazed. Then the sorceress.... and Squall saved me." Rinoa finished, her voice choked with emotion and on the verge of tears. "I think I might be like her. Siren said I had a lot of power.... plus this. Only people like.... her...can use magic without junctions. I'm just afraid that...."
Irvine laughed and Rinoa shot him an angry glare, "What?! You're a sorceress? That's just stupid! I'm sorry to make light of your story, but there's a perfectly rational explanation. You experienced your first limit break! It's fair to say you were stressed out, and your adrenaline levels were probably pretty high. Bingo. Limit break! It's a perfectly natural occurrence. So quit worrying."
"BUT!!"
"But nothing. You're not a sorceress. Why is everything extremes with you? I remember my first Limit Break. I was training with this wicked monster simulator. I was fighting a Grendel by myself for the first time. Bastard managed to get in a real close attack, nearly tore my arm off. So I freaked out and started shooting like crazy. Totally shredded the sim...the only reason I even stopped was I ran out of ammo. Man I thought I was really in for it, but my instructor just laughed at me. Still haven't lived it down. You're first experience with your Limit is always weird, but you'll get used to it once you can control it. Come on, let's go. Geesh, had me all worried over nothing."
He ruffled her hair and she gave an indignant yelp. Heading towards the car, they shook the morning dew from their clothes. The rest of their very long journey lay ahead, and there were many miles to go before their rest. The mountains blurred into hills which blended into flatlands, which blurred into the dry scrub of the desert. Rinoa watched the scenery pass, the pale rust of the rocky desert floor whirring by. She turned her head to look out the windshield, noticing that she could see the spires of the prison looming slowly ahead of them. In less than thirty minutes they'd be there. How long it seemed.
Authors Note--
Hey y'all! Nice to see everyone again. Thought I'd update before the wedding and stuff....cus I won't be around much....for a bit. I'll get some rest and hopefully be updating more often. Anyways, enjoy this chapter....yes, it's not much on the story line, but I wanted to stray a little bit for character development purposes......and it builds tension. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!