Happy New Year!

REQUEST: Could someone read my Harry Potter story? I started one...and had to bribe my best friend so she'd leave a review. Could someone please read it? I'm going to take it off if no one does, but I really dont want to because I think it'll be good. It's in my list of stories - check it out please!

How I Feel

Chapter the fourteenth: Crushed Hope

"You!" Heiji cried in disbelief. Ai shifted uncomfortably.

"Yes, me," she said. The cell door opened creakily again and Shinichi heard her footsteps come closer. Ai kneeled down next to Shinichi, avoiding Heiji's glare. She put a gentle hand on Shinichi's face and turned it to examine his rapidly swelling cheek. He pulled away from her tender touch in disgust.

"Don't touch me," he snapped. She sighed and pulled out a white handkerchief from the front pocket of her lab coat. She wiped away the blood on his face, ignoring his protests.

"I'm sorry about this Kudou," she whispered.

"Why did you do it?" he asked. "Why did you come back to them?"

"They threatened me!" she said indignantly. "I didn't want to. But they made an offer I couldn't refuse."

"What's that? Betray your friend and get a normal sized body?" Shinichi snapped angrily.

"It sounds bad when you say it like that," she said quietly.

"It sounds bad any way you say it, Sherry," he spat her code name like a curse word. She cleaned off the remaining blood from his face silently and got to her feet. As she closed the cell door, she looked up.

"I didn't want it to be this way. I didn't think it would get this far," she said, her voice cracking.

"Then why did you let it?" Shinichi asked venomously. She didn't answer, just locked the rusty padlock and walked away. Blood flowed out of Shinichi's nose still and down his arms, tickling his skin.

"Are you alright?" Heiji asked. Shinichi coughed.

"I'm fine," he said quietly.

"Maybe," Heiji started. He hesitated.

"What?" Shinichi asked.

"Maybe you shouldn't pick fight with them. It wouldn't be as bad for you," Heiji said slowly. Shinichi shifted.

"I guess," he said reluctantly. "But I don't like to show weakness."

"I know," Heiji whispered.

They sat in silence for what seemed like hours, before both boys finally fell asleep.

---

Shinichi awoke to a sharp kick to his stomach. He coughed and hunched forward slightly, the handcuffs keeping him in place. He clenched his eyes shut and gasped for breath. There was a soft clicking sound and his arms fell limply to his sides. He wrapped his arms around his stomach and curled up, trying to block out the pain from the blows that were raining down on him.

Finally, when he was too bloodied and beaten to move, someone grabbed his arms and forced him to walk out of the cell and through many hallways to a cold room, where he was forced into a chair. He slumped forward, but was pulled back and held upright by two firm, calloused hands.

"Sherry interrupted last night, but that isn't going to stop you from punishment," Vodka's voice floated through the room.

"We want you to have everything you need, so we had Sherry cook up a little something last night. Open your mouth," Gin's voice ordered. He clenched his teeth. Vodka smacked him again on his already swollen cheek. Dried blood already coated under his nose and his chin from the night before. Fresh blood spilled from his mouth and he felt it soaking into his shirt.

"Open your mouth!" Vodka bellowed, giving him a strong punch to the stomach. Shinichi cried out and instinctively tried to curl into himself. Vodka grabbed his face and forced his lips apart, spilling a liquid in then holding his mouth closed after. He swallowed against his will and Vodka took away his hand.

After a few moments, his eyes started to burn. He squirmed and struggled, but the hands holding him didn't let go. He screamed in intense agony and then the pain stopped. He fell limply against the back of the chair and closed his eyes.

"Very good. Now, let's see if it worked," Gin whispered. "Open your eyes, kid." Shinichi hesitated but opened his eyes slowly. He froze.

"Looks like it worked. Thank you Sherry, you're dismissed," Vodka smirked. Shinichi's breathing was getting heavier. It couldn't be possible, could it? No, no it couldn't happen like that. Vodka saw the fear on Shinichi's face and laughed evilly.

Shinichi blinked. He could see.

---

Later, Vodka dragged Shinichi back to the cell and handcuffed him to the wall tightly, reopening the wounds on his wrists. Deep crimson blood fell from the cuts, covering the dry reddish-black blood from the night before. He looked up into the coldhearted eyes of the blonde-haired man in fear.

"Have a nice rest, Kudou. Tomorrow is a big day," he said smiling. He turned and left. Shinichi pulled his legs up to his chest and rocked gently back and forth.

"Kudou, are you okay?" Heiji asked croakily. Shinichi looked up at his battered and bloodied fried and winced, half at the soreness in his whole body and half at Heiji's horrid state. One of his eyes was swollen and there was a deep gash on his cheek, which was bleeding down his face and staining his white T-shirt. Bruises dotted over his arms and neck, and Shinichi was sure there were more hidden under his clothes. He realized he couldn't look much better.

"You look horrible," he stated. Heiji looked at him oddly.

"You can see?" he asked. Shinichi's shoulders sagged and he nodded solemnly. "What's wrong?" Heiji asked.

"You don't know what I saw. And you don't want to know," Shinichi whispered.

"What?" Heiji whispered.

"It's awful. You don't know what they have up there all sorts of –," he broke off, shuddering. Heiji decided not to push the subject.

He wouldn't admit it, but he hurt all over. Kudou had been gone all day and when he was gone, there was no stopping them from beating him up, brutally. He was sure at least one rib was cracked, but the rest was just bruises that could be healed over time. Except for the cut on his cheek. He'd tried to fight back and they'd pulled a knife on him, slicing his cheek open.

Now Shinichi was back, and he looked horrible. He was bloody all over and had dried blood caked on his face and arms. Bruises covered the exposed flesh on his arms. By the way he was hunched over; Heiji knew they'd worked to give him as much pain as possible to his stomach and chest.

"Kudou!" Ai's voice interrupted his musings. He looked up and saw her standing there, grasping the bars in her hands and looking in with concern etched on her face.

"What do you want?" Shinichi whispered, not meeting her gaze.

"I wanted to see if you were alright," she said while unlocking the cell and sliding the door open. She hurried in and kneeled between them, first taking Heiji's chin in her hand and forcefully turning his head to examine the cut. She took a handkerchief from her pocket and pressed it to his face. He pulled away slightly but she held it firmly.

When the flow slowed, she took away the bloodied cloth and turned to Shinichi. He pulled away from her touch. She dampened the cloth with a water bottle and cleaned off the fresh and old blood from his face. He pulled away forcefully and spat at her.

"I don't need your help," he snapped. She pulled away and stood up haughtily. Her heels clicked on the cement floor as she walked out, slamming the door behind her.

"Fine. If you don't want my help, you can just sit down here and rot!" she hissed. She turned on her heel and walked briskly down the long hall and up the stairs. Shinichi was silent.

They were alone for a long time. Shinichi suspected it was night, because it got even colder. They could hear the pitter-patter of hail raining down on the house.

They could both see their breath floating in front of them as they shivered. Heiji's teeth chattered and he tried to curl up into himself to keep warm, but he got no warmth. Shinichi coughed. And he kept coughing, louder every time. He finally stopped when blood sprayed from his mouth and onto the floor. Heiji stared at Shinichi in horror, but Shinichi had fallen unconscious, blood steadily dripping from his slightly parted lips.

Heiji shook violently, part from cold and part from fear.

But it was only getting colder.

Three days passed by with similar treatment. They were awoken, and then beaten to unconsciousness. And it was always cold. By the fourth day, there was no way they could move if they tried. They had no broken bones, but lack of food and severe beatings made it almost impossible to move, so the organization stopped binding them with the handcuffs after the beatings.

Shinichi was sick. He wasn't getting any better with lack of nourishment or treatment either. He shivered constantly and was pale and sickly looking. Presently, Heiji had a soothing hand on his back as the two kneeled on their hands and feet, Shinichi vomiting blood on the cement floor. Both looked worse for the wear, bruised and exhausted, but Shinichi was worse by far.

He couldn't move by himself, nor could he speak. Heiji didn't know if he'd lost his voice or refused to speak, but whatever the reason, he hadn't said a word. Heiji dragged Shinichi away when he'd finished and they sat in the far corner of the cell, huddled together for warmth.

Ai hadn't come down anymore. Maybe she really didn't care. Perhaps if she had come down, she could've prevented Shinichi from getting so sick. But Heiji could tell from the look in Shinichi's eyes that he had lost hope. Shinichi had lost all hope of living to see sunlight again.

And so had Heiji.

---

Hum dee dum dee dum... ::Numerous evil glares:: Um...I'm sorry?

serenity-touched - Drama is fun!

Amanda - Yeah...that'll happen a lot in this story. Exceot this story is almost over ::Creepy Music::

Fyliwion - Well- Yeah actually, it is angsty now that i go back...but that's okay! (A/N: I LOVE YOUR PEN NAME! I can't get over how cool it is!)

Tant - Yes about that note...You arent going to like the emd of this story....But the sequel will be better and less angsty. Unless you want it to be of course

TheMeg - I try. (LOL)

Saide Janelle - Lol...thank you

Firestorm2004 - THANK YOU! I was like....Good? Bad? AHHHH! But thanks for telling me. Thanks for reviewing btw