Title: Lost
Author: Quick-demon
Disclaimer: I want a blow up doll of Jak. I don't think naughty dog would
manufacture naughty things. So their name is misleading though. Still Jak isn't
mine but I would like to dream...
Disclaimers for Pokemon too... if they manufacture dolls.
Rating: PG-13 (only for minor sexual references. Nothing disgusting!)
Genre: General, Humor
Game: Jak 3 but Jak II friendly
Summery: Daxter has lost Jak and it seems that not the only thing that is lost... This ones for the ladies but its guy friendly too.
Author's notes: Hey everyone! Another kooky idea that I got. My muse has been getting ideas... Erh you don't have to know Jak 3 to read this fic. Ok? This is my birthday gift to you.
So have fun!
And a laugh.
"Damn stupid Precursor crap!" Daxter cursed, "Why? Why do they do the most stupidest things?"
When no one answered him Daxter turned around.
"Jak? Jak!"
No one answered. Oh great! Not only they touched one of those figure heads in the desert, Jak was gone as well. You know one of those figure heads with glowing eyes giving Jak tasks to 'prove he's a hero'. Well Jak touched one of those and 'hey presto' Daxter found himself alone in a room. A Precursor metal made room.
"Jak! JAAAAK!" Daxter called as he moved off down the adjoining hall
No answer.
"If I don't find you, that means I get your Morph Gun and your Pokemon Doll Collection!" Daxter's voice echoed down the hall
Silence was his answer.
"I swear I'm going to kill you if I find you" Daxter muttered
The hall sloped down some stairs. Daxter stepped down them annoyed that he couldn't find his friend.
"Jaaaaak! Jaaaaaak!" Daxter called
Still no answer.
"Question: How the hell can you loose a six foot tall, man who freaks out purple and white? Answer: Precursor technology" Daxter muttered, "Great I'm talking to myself!"
He turned to the halls and yelled, "See Jak! You're making me talk to myself! Where the hell are you?"
Still no answer.
"Damn it Jak!" Daxter growled
His voice echoed, magnified by the sound metal. Daxter found himself in a room filled with columns. Perfectly spaced. He thought it was odd to have so many column bunched together. Daxter heard shuffling which broke his mental train..
He turned, "Jak?"
It was quiet again. Daxter glared at the spot he heard the noise. He walked towards it then stopped. He didn't dare to move around. Someone was in this room, hostile or not Daxter couldn't be caught off guard. He wasn't the hide and seek champion of Sandover for nothing. He can find this person in this column filled room.
Daxter suddenly lunged to the side and he hit the prize as his hands felt warm soft skin. His force knocked the person or thing over.
"Ah ha! You think you could escape me- JAK?" Daxter exclaimed
"Hey Dax..." Jak gave a little wave
"I've been looking for you! You know that? Where have you been?" Daxter ranted, "You look different... anyway you know how I hate spiders and this place is crawling with spiders. You should be ashamed about leaving me alone! You know I have to go to the psychiatrist to help me deal with the problems that we face everyday!? If we don't leave right now... I'm going to be late!"
Daxter walked around while he ranted on, "You know how much they cost? I had to pay with my credit card- Hey now I know what's different about you... you're naked"
"Daxter!" Jak hissed as if someone else could hear it
Daxter turned and he saw the bottom half of Jak, "Gezus Jak! That's one big-"
"DAXTER!" Jak was going pink
"Er... what happened to your clothes buddy?" Daxter turned back
"I don't know..." Jak shrugged, "One moment I was with you and the next down here with..."
"Nothing?"
"Yeah"
Daxter turned back to Jak's bottom half, "Hey did you have an enlargement?"
"DAXTER!" Jak snapped, his face going scarlet
"Oh I know you answered those enlargement SPAM ads didn't you?"
"Daxter!" Jak hissed
"Or did your 'powers' help you reach that-"
"DAXTER! I swear if you open your mouth again about that I'm going to sow it shut!" Jak roared
"You can sow?"
"I can mange" Jak retorted coldly
"A bit chilly in here isn't it?" Daxter quipped with a shit eating grin
"Daxter this isn't funny"
"Welcome to my world. Now you can go run around with out a pair of pants"
"But you have fur! I have... nothing" Jak whined
"What? You're not muscle and bone. I believe you have, what they call... skin Jak"
"No! I mean clothing"
"So? I'm still naked and you don't really rush around to get me some clothes!"
"But you're an expectable naked..." Jak murmured
"Expectable naked? Is there such a term Jak? Honestly?"
"Well all animals are naked..."
Daxter sighed, "Once again you don't understand"
"Hey... can you communicate to animals?" Jak asked
"Say what?"
"You know since you turned into animal and all..."
"Jak that was not funny"
"Welcome to my world"
"Your world? Oh sure! Receiving powers, getting credit for my work and being the hero of the universe... its a pretty nice world"
"Going insane, getting kicked out of Haven City, nearly dying, going on suicide missions, getting shot at, tortured, nearly getting eaten, getting killed in general... sure life's a party" Jak countered sarcastically then teased as an after thought, "What, why? Getting jealous Dax?"
"For that you're going to sit here and freeze some more" Daxter shot back
"How about we go and find my clothes?" Jak asked
"How about you can expose those parts to the sunshine? Sun helps things grow..."
"Daxter!" Jak growled warningly
"Or is it shrinking because its cold?" Daxter teased
"That's it! You've gone too far! Where's my gun?! When I'm done you're gonna have more holes than a putt putt course!"
"Oh Jak I know you never would hurt me"
"Wanna bet?"
"Oh is someone hating the cold?"
"Daxter!"
"Ha ha! I'm loving this" Daxter grinned, "About time some one acknowledges my suffering!"
"I think I'm getting hypothermia" Jak muttered
"I think you don't like to be in my shoes"
"Daxter! You have fur! That's more better against the elements than... skin!"
"So? Grow a thick skin!"
"Daxter!"
"What?"
"You're not helping!"
"Should I be?"
"Yes!"
"Please give me one good reason why?"
"Do you want to be late for your psychiatrist appointment?" Jak asked cleverly
"Ahhh... you have a point" Daxter jumped off Jak's bare chest
Jak rose. His bare feet slapped against the stone floor. Daxter hadn't noticed they were stone until now.
"Wow if only Kiera or Ashelin could see you now..."
"Daxter!" Jak growled in a warning tone
Suddenly Daxter flipped out a camera, "Say cheese"
"What the-?"
FLASH. Daxter flipped out a camera and pressed the button.
"Its handy to always have a camera. I learned something during our adventures Jak. Some situations we get in are worth taking the camera" Daxter grinned patting the small digital camera
Jak looked ready to strange him. Daxter was oblivious to the man behind him.
"Ahhh. I should make copies and give one to Kiera or to Ashelin. Oooh, ooooh! Maybe I can bribe Ashelin to give me a naked picture of her as a trade..."
"Arrrrrggghh!" Jak lunged at Daxter
"Ahhhhh!" Daxter screeched
The two friends fumbled around. Jak being more bigger and stronger took the upper hand right away and pinned the Ottsel on the ground.
"Ahhh! Please don't hurt me!" Daxter whined
"That depends..." Jak replied
"Depends on what?"
"Give me the camera"
"No way! I got a really good picture of Ashelin's butt! No way!"
"Give it here Daxter" came the warning tone
"No!" Daxter said stubbornly
Daxter looked down and commented, "Mmmm... I swear you had an enlargement..."
Jak looked down also. That was the distraction Daxter needed, he wretched his arm free. Jak responded by facing back at him and Daxter poked Jak in the eye. Poking someone in the eye can bring the biggest beast down. It brought Jak down... of off him.
"Ow!" Jak cried and his hands flung to his right eye
Daxter jumped up and escaped.
"Daxter!" Jak bellowed kicking himself for falling for such a trick
"Wait until Torn sees this!"
"DAXTER! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Jak roared
He got up and ran after Daxter out of the room.
"I wish I had my Morph Gun!" Jak muttered
Heavy slapping feet chased after the smaller pattering feet.
The End
So what did you think for my first Jak 3 fic? Ok so I was crazy on Jak's little streak but erh the first Jak 3 fic had to come in with a good entrance.
Love it? Hate it? Send me a review! Tell me what you think?