In the Doghouse
By Saraman
"I see you," called Paris playfully. "Come down or I'm coming up."
"You'll never get me down," replied Helen. "I can stay up here for as long as it takes."
"Oh, come on, honey," pleaded Paris. "You're not still upset about the Pitt are you?"
"He was your brother-in-law," she answered, shifting her weight in the tree. "You could have at least given him a chance."
"My brother-in-law!" exclaimed Paris. "You're not serious!" Helen nodded.
"Achilles was a relation to you, whether you like it or not."
"How so?" questioned Paris.
"Andromache is his sister," explained Helen. "She married your brother Hector. Hence, he was your brother-in-law."
"No, no, no!" complained Paris. "It can't be! The Pitt is a relative?"
"Figure it out for yourself," said Helen. "Andromache is from Greece, specifically Mycenae, Greece. So was Achilles."
"Please forgive me, Helen," begged Paris. "A madness took me, but it has passed!"
"Uh huh," said Helen, unbelievingly. "Just like the time when a madness took you and you stole me from Menelaus?"
"Uh, well, no…" stammered Paris. "That time it was manly instincts, or peer pressure, or threats from crew members, or my bus was late, or my dog ate my homework, or every other excuse in the book."
"I see," said Helen. "But, I will come down. Only if you promise to sleep in the doghouse from now on, though."
"That's not very reasonable," protested Paris. "Then where will the dog sleep?"
"In my room on a silk cushion," replied Helen.
"All this over a Pitt!" fumed Paris. "A Brad Pitt's pit!"
"Hum de dum de dum!" hummed Helen.
Finis