Oh my lord. Barely half a day goes by and already this is hailed as
"classic comedy!"
It's been two days since I took a breather, resting my weary fingers and
taking in classic Kenshin humor. Now that that's done, time for me to get
back to work. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to get on the Internet for
several days.
Disclaimer: I don't own Ruroni Kenshin or its characters; the only one I own here is Juno.
Saitou: Why did you have that stupid rooster shove that. thing down my throat?!
Ravenf6: "So it is written, so it shall be", Saitou. Did anyone ever tell you you're stiffer than the dead in the underworld?
Saitou prepares to do a gatotsu but just as quickly, several soldier heartless emerge and bind him in chains.
Ravenf6: Now that I was so rudely interrupted, I have to say that I don't own the Heartless either, those guys belong to Squaresoft. I like being an author; you get away with so much. In the words of the immortal bard:
"It's good to be the king."
Chapter 5: The fortunes of a wanderer
This had been an auspicious day on several occasions: Yahiko acquires a new sword, Kaoru got her shyness off her chest, and Saitou actually showed signs of being human.
Even though all that had transpired, the day was not over yet, for Kenshin had yet his fortune to be revealed.
Right now though, things were about to erupt in chaos in the lobby. Sano and Saitou were at it again. "You're going to pay for that mushroom, you cocky little chicken!" Saitou shouted to Sano.
"I can't help it if you don't watch what your eating, Fido." Sano shot back at the annoyed cop.
"I've killed people for comments less slanderous than that" Saitou took out his katana "I'll hound you until I've made you cough up your organs!"
Sano felt a smile creep on his face at his next comment: "Then be a good dog and sit!"
Kaoru, Yahiko and Megumi began to burst out in laughter, picturing Saitou as a dog. The latter's blood began to boil like a cauldron of molten slag. "That tears it, you better pray that the fortuneteller knows how to raise the dead!"
Juno acted swifttly and shot a blizzard from his hands, freezing the two enemies into human Popsicles. "I thought I warned you two: no fighting in my house!" The hooded sorcerer defrosted his targets in disdain. "It looks like I'm going to have to teach you about proper respect for others, Sanouske Sagara."
"And just how do you think you'll do that, squirt?" Sano approached Juno with a sly glint in his eye. "You don't look like much to me."
"For someone who used to be called Zanza," Juno began. "I expected someone more intimidating. But you're just a lowly street punk."
Now it was Sano's turn to have his vein pulsing with anger. "You'd better watch it Shorty, or else you're gonna have a black eye to go with those robes." . Juno folded his hand out and held it up to Sano's face. "What's faster, your fists or my magic? Let's find out." He shot out a small explosion into Sano's face. When the smoke cleared, Sano was wide-eyed and his head was as black as ashes. "Anymore funny business out of you, and I'll see if I can remove your soul."
Sano quickly backed up against the wall, white with fear. "That shrimp, he's inhuman!" he quivered. Saitou grinned from ear as he watched the scourge of his day trembling with fear.
"I don't think there was any need for that, Juno." Kenshin said to the fortuneteller. "Sano has already suffered enough today, that he has."
"Hmm I suppose, but I guess turning the other cheek isn't his style." Juno acquitted. "I'm sorry about that, but right now though, the only thing that needs to be addressed is your future, Kenshin." The wanderer followed Juno into the private room, leaving the others to themselves.
"Are you sure it was a wise idea to leave them by themselves?" Kenshin asked as he sat himself at the table. "I think so." Juno answered. "After that little fireworks display, I'm sure your friend will be humbled, and I know Saitou wouldn't do anything funny, it's not his way." Juno poured some tea for the both of them. "Any mystery can be unraveled at your feet Kenshin, what would you wish to know this night?"
Kenshin drank a little of his tea before he gave his answer: "I want to know if I can live the rest of my days in peace." A riffle of the cards later, three were laid face down on the table. "We all would like peace, Kenshin." Juno sighed. "It's too bad some people don't think that way. He turned over the first card. "Death."
Kenshin looked down at the infamous card with little surprise. "When I said I've seen your past, I saw only as much as I could bear." Juno began. "Your life has been a sad one, Kenshin, so much death and violence. I often in my sleep see the gods contemplating you as the next reaper of souls should your time come. But the death card is also one of change. In spite of all you've done during the revolution, you devote yourself to protecting the defenseless. Do you not feet irredeemable for what you cannot change?"
Kenshin sat calmly. "It's true that I can't bring back all the lives I took, but that is how I am repenting for those sins, that I am. Mastery of swordsmanship is only killing people and spilling blood. I did learn one thing though, even if my life will be forever damned, I can still protect those I care about with my sword."
Juno nodded slowly. "An interesting paradox: a being who knows death, yet seeks to preserve life. You're an unusual person, Kenshin."
Kenshin began to drink some more tea while Juno turned over the second card. "The Judgment. Even though you've changed since the Revolution, something about your old life clings to your soul, something frightening."
Kenshin knew very well what Juno was talking about, suppressed deep in the void of his subconscious was the embodiment of his evil side, Battousai the Manslayer. The ruthless shadow yearns for the day to emerge and kill again.
"It must be hard for you to maintain sanity, Kenshin." Juno said sympathetically. "I'd be terrified knowing that I could turn into a killer at an instant's notice. I'm sad to say that there is no spell that I know or potion I could make that can calm your Battousai self forever."
Kenshin shook his head slowly. "I never asked if that could be done. This is my curse, no kind of magic can undo it, but I remember what someone said. He said that I am a manslayer to the core, and that truly written in stone, but I can still live my life as a wanderer."
"That would not be an easy road." Juno said. "But now we must look to the future." He turned the third card over. "??. The Fool?"
"Is there something wrong?" Kenshin looked at it with a look of confusion. "what is so bad about it?"
"Terrible misfortune is on the horizon, Kenshin." Juno explained. "You should be very cautious. I'm afraid I can't decipher what it is."
Kenshin rose from his seat. "That sounds serious. But I'm pretty sure I can handle it regardless what it is."
"Then, I'm afraid your reading is finished." Juno shook his head. "Well, we better check to see if your friends haven't destroyed anything."
The wanderer and the fortuneteller reentered the lobby. To Kenshin's surprise, Sano and Saitou haven't done anything the least bit violent: They were playing mahjong.
"You lose again, rooster." Saitou declared. "That makes it 9 to 0."
"I'm feeling my luck changing, Shifty and I'm about to bury you." Sano retorted irritably. "Just you wait."
"I can't believe those two can actually fit an outlet for their grudge outside of fighting." Megumi observed. "I guess even miracles are possible."
Juno looked at the clock as it struck 5:30. "He should be here soon."
"Who?" Kenshin asked.
"One of my best customers." Juno said. "He always comes by once in a while."
A loud knock came from the door. Juno answered it promptly. "Wow, you sure are early tonight, Hiko."
Kenshin stood frozen in his tracks and turned towards the door. He easily recognized the large frame, the green hair, and that red-and-white cloak. Yet he still couldn't believe that his former master had come all the way from Kyoto.
"Hmm. So the master of the Hiten Mitsurugi style has come." Saitou thought to himself. "What could bring someone like him over to Tokyo?"
"So, Hiko. You've come for the usual?" Juno asked the almost giant man.
"You've got that right." Hiko said as he made his way towards Kenshin. "Though I didn't expect to see my stupid apprentice here as well."
"It's good to see you again, master." Kenshin greeted. "Miss Kaoru brought us here to have our fortunes read."
Saitou got up from his mahjong game to speak to former Battousai. "I'm not surprised that your little Raccoon Girl would go for such a thing."
"But why does Juno know you, Saitou?" Kenshin asked. "You're not one to be sociable. That you're not."
Saitou took a quick look at Sano who was trying to peek at his tiles, when the rooster withdrew from his attempted cheating; he turned back to Kenshin and Hiko. "True. But as you clearly saw, this boy is good at making remedies. My wife has an unbearable ulcer. Perhaps the Fox Woman could learn something from him."
Megumi shot Saitou an angry look, and then turned away.
"So what is it that you came for?" Kenshin asked Hiko.
".I don't really care if that kid can see the future, but he does brew some good sake." Hiko answered. "Maybe you should try some when he gets back."
Juno returned shortly with a large pot of the sake. "Extra strong, just the way you like it. That'll be 8 yen."
Hiko produced the money and gave it to Juno. "Do you have any left over? My stupid apprentice fancies a sample."
"What's with stupid apprentice thing?" Saitou asked. "The Battousai is a master in swordsmanship, if it weren't for the Kyoto affair I would have had his head."
"But you didn't take it did you?" Hiko asked in reprisal. "Kenshin may be able to wield a sword, but if he hadn't left to fight in the revolution, he truly might have become invincible."
Kenshin shook his head in denial. "Thousands of people would have died if the Revolution dragged on. The only real solution was to stop the fighting."
"Okay, I got the sake!" Juno announced. He brought a smaller jug and several cups. "I warn you though, drink it at your own risk."
"And why's that?" Sano asked. "Its just sake. The worse it can do is get is drunk and forgetful."
"Just like you?" Yahiko asked slyly.
"Yeah, just like- hey! Wait a minute-!" Sano realized his mistake. Everyone else in the room laughed at Yahiko's joke. Saitou merely grinned in satisfaction.
"So Juno, what is it about this sake that's so dangerous?" Kenshin examined the seemingly harmless brew.
Juno filled a cup and set it on the table, among the mahjong game. "In my travels around the world, I often set up shop in bars or restaurants. It all started at a large pub in Scotland. I was experimenting with my potions when I noticed that most of the customers were interested in a good drink. Problem was that the bartender had his latest shipment of scotch stolen. I made a bet with him that if I could brew some good scotch for him, he'd convince his customers to try my fortunes. It took me about 7 hours to create a prototype, but it was worth it: The first one to try it was a real tough guy from the Highlands. He said it was like fire in a cup-"
"So you went into the liquor business like that?" Sano asked the fortuneteller.
"Not exactly." Juno shook his head. "My brews have no alcohol. Ever since that time, I always created a synthetic drink whenever I visited a new country. It's good for business without the side effects. This sake in particular wasn't selling as much as I hoped when I was passing through Kyoto."
Hiko then decided to elaborate the rest. "At that time, I kept my end of the bargain of looking over your friends, Kenshin. Then I was dying for something hard. It was then I ran into this little guy and he offered me some sake. It had a good kick to it, so I ended up buying a load from him every once in a while. Then he left saying that he was going to set up shop in Tokyo a few days ago. I felt restless and decided to come down here a short while later."
Sano picked up a cup and poured himself some of the drink. "Now that's a guy who likes his sake."
Juno put his tarot cards in his robes and handed the sake to Kenshin and Hiko. "Well if there's no objections, bottoms up, folks."
Hiko drained his cup in an instant and looked to his stupid apprentice. "It's not that bad try it."
Kenshin looked at his cup, it certainly looked enough like sake so he took a gulp. It seemed harmless enough. But Kenshin felt a strong reaction inside his body: smoke began to hiss from his ears, his eyes turned red. "Y- y-y-yikes! My throat is on fire!!" Poor Kenshin ran around, clutching his throat. Everyone watched with eyes as big as dinner plates (except for Hiko and Saitou, of course.) as the wanderer vainly searched for some water.
Hiko and Saitou watched the comedy of errors with a bizarre sense of confusion. "I always thought the Battousai was mighty, but I'm not seeing this: he's crazy!" The wolf said to his larger companion. "I know what you mean." Hiko nodded. "He rarely listened to me years ago, and now he's soft as a marshmallow. It's pathetic. "
Yahiko ended the ordeal when he brought in a bucket of water and threw it at Kenshin. "Thanks Yahiko, I needed that, but it looks as though my fortune has come to pass." Said a grateful, but soaking wet Kenshin. Hiko walked up to him with a mirthful grin on his face. "That was funny, never thought you'd become a clown after all that you've been through." He slapped Kenshin on the back, but Kenshin ended up falling to the floor; much to Saitou's delight
"You should have seen him when the festival was going on a long time ago." Juno said to Saitou. "He did things you wouldn't believe. He sang a ballad that put a lot of people in hysterics."
Saitou's face began to contort. This was becoming too much to bear for his serious personage. For the first time tonight, Saitou actually laughed (Yeah I know, completely out of character for Saitou). Kenshin on the other hand, blushed as red as his hair. The sun went down as the Silver-eyed Star rang with laughter..
I know what you're thinking, and no, this is not the end. I thank you all for your patience as this proved to be a hard chapter to write (writer's block, mostly). Next up, Juno begins to read Sano's future. I don't know when I'll get started on it, as I plan to see relatives over the weekend, so I'm afraid I can't guarantee another update anytime soon.
Later!
Disclaimer: I don't own Ruroni Kenshin or its characters; the only one I own here is Juno.
Saitou: Why did you have that stupid rooster shove that. thing down my throat?!
Ravenf6: "So it is written, so it shall be", Saitou. Did anyone ever tell you you're stiffer than the dead in the underworld?
Saitou prepares to do a gatotsu but just as quickly, several soldier heartless emerge and bind him in chains.
Ravenf6: Now that I was so rudely interrupted, I have to say that I don't own the Heartless either, those guys belong to Squaresoft. I like being an author; you get away with so much. In the words of the immortal bard:
"It's good to be the king."
Chapter 5: The fortunes of a wanderer
This had been an auspicious day on several occasions: Yahiko acquires a new sword, Kaoru got her shyness off her chest, and Saitou actually showed signs of being human.
Even though all that had transpired, the day was not over yet, for Kenshin had yet his fortune to be revealed.
Right now though, things were about to erupt in chaos in the lobby. Sano and Saitou were at it again. "You're going to pay for that mushroom, you cocky little chicken!" Saitou shouted to Sano.
"I can't help it if you don't watch what your eating, Fido." Sano shot back at the annoyed cop.
"I've killed people for comments less slanderous than that" Saitou took out his katana "I'll hound you until I've made you cough up your organs!"
Sano felt a smile creep on his face at his next comment: "Then be a good dog and sit!"
Kaoru, Yahiko and Megumi began to burst out in laughter, picturing Saitou as a dog. The latter's blood began to boil like a cauldron of molten slag. "That tears it, you better pray that the fortuneteller knows how to raise the dead!"
Juno acted swifttly and shot a blizzard from his hands, freezing the two enemies into human Popsicles. "I thought I warned you two: no fighting in my house!" The hooded sorcerer defrosted his targets in disdain. "It looks like I'm going to have to teach you about proper respect for others, Sanouske Sagara."
"And just how do you think you'll do that, squirt?" Sano approached Juno with a sly glint in his eye. "You don't look like much to me."
"For someone who used to be called Zanza," Juno began. "I expected someone more intimidating. But you're just a lowly street punk."
Now it was Sano's turn to have his vein pulsing with anger. "You'd better watch it Shorty, or else you're gonna have a black eye to go with those robes." . Juno folded his hand out and held it up to Sano's face. "What's faster, your fists or my magic? Let's find out." He shot out a small explosion into Sano's face. When the smoke cleared, Sano was wide-eyed and his head was as black as ashes. "Anymore funny business out of you, and I'll see if I can remove your soul."
Sano quickly backed up against the wall, white with fear. "That shrimp, he's inhuman!" he quivered. Saitou grinned from ear as he watched the scourge of his day trembling with fear.
"I don't think there was any need for that, Juno." Kenshin said to the fortuneteller. "Sano has already suffered enough today, that he has."
"Hmm I suppose, but I guess turning the other cheek isn't his style." Juno acquitted. "I'm sorry about that, but right now though, the only thing that needs to be addressed is your future, Kenshin." The wanderer followed Juno into the private room, leaving the others to themselves.
"Are you sure it was a wise idea to leave them by themselves?" Kenshin asked as he sat himself at the table. "I think so." Juno answered. "After that little fireworks display, I'm sure your friend will be humbled, and I know Saitou wouldn't do anything funny, it's not his way." Juno poured some tea for the both of them. "Any mystery can be unraveled at your feet Kenshin, what would you wish to know this night?"
Kenshin drank a little of his tea before he gave his answer: "I want to know if I can live the rest of my days in peace." A riffle of the cards later, three were laid face down on the table. "We all would like peace, Kenshin." Juno sighed. "It's too bad some people don't think that way. He turned over the first card. "Death."
Kenshin looked down at the infamous card with little surprise. "When I said I've seen your past, I saw only as much as I could bear." Juno began. "Your life has been a sad one, Kenshin, so much death and violence. I often in my sleep see the gods contemplating you as the next reaper of souls should your time come. But the death card is also one of change. In spite of all you've done during the revolution, you devote yourself to protecting the defenseless. Do you not feet irredeemable for what you cannot change?"
Kenshin sat calmly. "It's true that I can't bring back all the lives I took, but that is how I am repenting for those sins, that I am. Mastery of swordsmanship is only killing people and spilling blood. I did learn one thing though, even if my life will be forever damned, I can still protect those I care about with my sword."
Juno nodded slowly. "An interesting paradox: a being who knows death, yet seeks to preserve life. You're an unusual person, Kenshin."
Kenshin began to drink some more tea while Juno turned over the second card. "The Judgment. Even though you've changed since the Revolution, something about your old life clings to your soul, something frightening."
Kenshin knew very well what Juno was talking about, suppressed deep in the void of his subconscious was the embodiment of his evil side, Battousai the Manslayer. The ruthless shadow yearns for the day to emerge and kill again.
"It must be hard for you to maintain sanity, Kenshin." Juno said sympathetically. "I'd be terrified knowing that I could turn into a killer at an instant's notice. I'm sad to say that there is no spell that I know or potion I could make that can calm your Battousai self forever."
Kenshin shook his head slowly. "I never asked if that could be done. This is my curse, no kind of magic can undo it, but I remember what someone said. He said that I am a manslayer to the core, and that truly written in stone, but I can still live my life as a wanderer."
"That would not be an easy road." Juno said. "But now we must look to the future." He turned the third card over. "??. The Fool?"
"Is there something wrong?" Kenshin looked at it with a look of confusion. "what is so bad about it?"
"Terrible misfortune is on the horizon, Kenshin." Juno explained. "You should be very cautious. I'm afraid I can't decipher what it is."
Kenshin rose from his seat. "That sounds serious. But I'm pretty sure I can handle it regardless what it is."
"Then, I'm afraid your reading is finished." Juno shook his head. "Well, we better check to see if your friends haven't destroyed anything."
The wanderer and the fortuneteller reentered the lobby. To Kenshin's surprise, Sano and Saitou haven't done anything the least bit violent: They were playing mahjong.
"You lose again, rooster." Saitou declared. "That makes it 9 to 0."
"I'm feeling my luck changing, Shifty and I'm about to bury you." Sano retorted irritably. "Just you wait."
"I can't believe those two can actually fit an outlet for their grudge outside of fighting." Megumi observed. "I guess even miracles are possible."
Juno looked at the clock as it struck 5:30. "He should be here soon."
"Who?" Kenshin asked.
"One of my best customers." Juno said. "He always comes by once in a while."
A loud knock came from the door. Juno answered it promptly. "Wow, you sure are early tonight, Hiko."
Kenshin stood frozen in his tracks and turned towards the door. He easily recognized the large frame, the green hair, and that red-and-white cloak. Yet he still couldn't believe that his former master had come all the way from Kyoto.
"Hmm. So the master of the Hiten Mitsurugi style has come." Saitou thought to himself. "What could bring someone like him over to Tokyo?"
"So, Hiko. You've come for the usual?" Juno asked the almost giant man.
"You've got that right." Hiko said as he made his way towards Kenshin. "Though I didn't expect to see my stupid apprentice here as well."
"It's good to see you again, master." Kenshin greeted. "Miss Kaoru brought us here to have our fortunes read."
Saitou got up from his mahjong game to speak to former Battousai. "I'm not surprised that your little Raccoon Girl would go for such a thing."
"But why does Juno know you, Saitou?" Kenshin asked. "You're not one to be sociable. That you're not."
Saitou took a quick look at Sano who was trying to peek at his tiles, when the rooster withdrew from his attempted cheating; he turned back to Kenshin and Hiko. "True. But as you clearly saw, this boy is good at making remedies. My wife has an unbearable ulcer. Perhaps the Fox Woman could learn something from him."
Megumi shot Saitou an angry look, and then turned away.
"So what is it that you came for?" Kenshin asked Hiko.
".I don't really care if that kid can see the future, but he does brew some good sake." Hiko answered. "Maybe you should try some when he gets back."
Juno returned shortly with a large pot of the sake. "Extra strong, just the way you like it. That'll be 8 yen."
Hiko produced the money and gave it to Juno. "Do you have any left over? My stupid apprentice fancies a sample."
"What's with stupid apprentice thing?" Saitou asked. "The Battousai is a master in swordsmanship, if it weren't for the Kyoto affair I would have had his head."
"But you didn't take it did you?" Hiko asked in reprisal. "Kenshin may be able to wield a sword, but if he hadn't left to fight in the revolution, he truly might have become invincible."
Kenshin shook his head in denial. "Thousands of people would have died if the Revolution dragged on. The only real solution was to stop the fighting."
"Okay, I got the sake!" Juno announced. He brought a smaller jug and several cups. "I warn you though, drink it at your own risk."
"And why's that?" Sano asked. "Its just sake. The worse it can do is get is drunk and forgetful."
"Just like you?" Yahiko asked slyly.
"Yeah, just like- hey! Wait a minute-!" Sano realized his mistake. Everyone else in the room laughed at Yahiko's joke. Saitou merely grinned in satisfaction.
"So Juno, what is it about this sake that's so dangerous?" Kenshin examined the seemingly harmless brew.
Juno filled a cup and set it on the table, among the mahjong game. "In my travels around the world, I often set up shop in bars or restaurants. It all started at a large pub in Scotland. I was experimenting with my potions when I noticed that most of the customers were interested in a good drink. Problem was that the bartender had his latest shipment of scotch stolen. I made a bet with him that if I could brew some good scotch for him, he'd convince his customers to try my fortunes. It took me about 7 hours to create a prototype, but it was worth it: The first one to try it was a real tough guy from the Highlands. He said it was like fire in a cup-"
"So you went into the liquor business like that?" Sano asked the fortuneteller.
"Not exactly." Juno shook his head. "My brews have no alcohol. Ever since that time, I always created a synthetic drink whenever I visited a new country. It's good for business without the side effects. This sake in particular wasn't selling as much as I hoped when I was passing through Kyoto."
Hiko then decided to elaborate the rest. "At that time, I kept my end of the bargain of looking over your friends, Kenshin. Then I was dying for something hard. It was then I ran into this little guy and he offered me some sake. It had a good kick to it, so I ended up buying a load from him every once in a while. Then he left saying that he was going to set up shop in Tokyo a few days ago. I felt restless and decided to come down here a short while later."
Sano picked up a cup and poured himself some of the drink. "Now that's a guy who likes his sake."
Juno put his tarot cards in his robes and handed the sake to Kenshin and Hiko. "Well if there's no objections, bottoms up, folks."
Hiko drained his cup in an instant and looked to his stupid apprentice. "It's not that bad try it."
Kenshin looked at his cup, it certainly looked enough like sake so he took a gulp. It seemed harmless enough. But Kenshin felt a strong reaction inside his body: smoke began to hiss from his ears, his eyes turned red. "Y- y-y-yikes! My throat is on fire!!" Poor Kenshin ran around, clutching his throat. Everyone watched with eyes as big as dinner plates (except for Hiko and Saitou, of course.) as the wanderer vainly searched for some water.
Hiko and Saitou watched the comedy of errors with a bizarre sense of confusion. "I always thought the Battousai was mighty, but I'm not seeing this: he's crazy!" The wolf said to his larger companion. "I know what you mean." Hiko nodded. "He rarely listened to me years ago, and now he's soft as a marshmallow. It's pathetic. "
Yahiko ended the ordeal when he brought in a bucket of water and threw it at Kenshin. "Thanks Yahiko, I needed that, but it looks as though my fortune has come to pass." Said a grateful, but soaking wet Kenshin. Hiko walked up to him with a mirthful grin on his face. "That was funny, never thought you'd become a clown after all that you've been through." He slapped Kenshin on the back, but Kenshin ended up falling to the floor; much to Saitou's delight
"You should have seen him when the festival was going on a long time ago." Juno said to Saitou. "He did things you wouldn't believe. He sang a ballad that put a lot of people in hysterics."
Saitou's face began to contort. This was becoming too much to bear for his serious personage. For the first time tonight, Saitou actually laughed (Yeah I know, completely out of character for Saitou). Kenshin on the other hand, blushed as red as his hair. The sun went down as the Silver-eyed Star rang with laughter..
I know what you're thinking, and no, this is not the end. I thank you all for your patience as this proved to be a hard chapter to write (writer's block, mostly). Next up, Juno begins to read Sano's future. I don't know when I'll get started on it, as I plan to see relatives over the weekend, so I'm afraid I can't guarantee another update anytime soon.
Later!