Pretty Like Drugs
By: Holly Rose E.
Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: sorry for it being late, guys. It was harder to write for than I thought it would be. :::blush:::
Chapter One: Bad Habit
And you might say it's self-indulgent
You might say it's self-destructive
But you see it's more productive
Than if I were to be healthy
---The Dresden Dolls
He awoke slowly and rolled ovr, moaning at the pain that was fixated between his shoulder blades. Never one to cry, or at least admit to it, he was nearly compelled to do so at the dull ache that was throbbing in his entire being, consuming all his senses and overriding everything else that may have otherwise been relevant to him.
Throwing an arm over his eyes as he squirmed to try and get a little sense of comfort and when finding none, he sat up and discovered the reason for being even sorer than the previous night. He had fallen asleep on the floor.
"Damn," he muttered, pulling himself into a sitting position and leaning against the wall. The scalpel that he had gotten out the night before lay a few feet away, caked with a murky maroon. Getting to his feet slowly, grabbing the tool on his way up and pocketing it into his belt, he went to the cabinet and looked ovr his choices. Tylenol seemed his best bet, and he dry-swallowed two.
"Robin?" A tentative voice from the doorway, sing-songy even when wrought with worry, "Have you awoken yet?"
"Ye-," he cleared his throat and tried again, "Yeah, Star, I'll be out in a minute."
"Friend Raven is preparing our breakfast; it will be finished soon."
He smiled to himself while putting his gloves back on and rubbing his forearm lightly, at her inability to contain her concern. While it was an admirable character suit, it could also one day get her into trouble.
Then he locked on to what she had said - Raven cooking. She didn't have breakfast duty for another three weeks, and even when she was scheduled to cook, Cyborg or Beast Boy usually did the cooking for her, arguing incessantly even after all this time as housemates as to what should be made to be eaten for the day's beginning meal.
He made his way towards the door and while walking out of the room almost made the mbarasing mistake of walking straight into Starfire's chest, for she had been pressed close to the door and suspended n air. She was in her trademark despondent pose, with one arm gripping the other's elbow with her eyebrows furrowed, while slightly nibbling on her lower lip slowly.
"Are you feeling better today, Robin?" Starfire asked, oblivious to how close Robin had come to embedding himself into her 'grebnaks'. 1
"I'm fine, Star," he replied as gently as he could, walking down the hall towards the kitchen, the smells of waffles and bacon wafting gently and adding to the pounding in his head, no matter how delicious the aromas were.
"Hey man!" Cyborg waved a hand that clutched a full glass of milk and Robin watched as the white droplets dive-bombed headfirst and longingly to the table. Cyborg, unmindful as to where his drink was ending up, just ushered him over. "Rae's cookin' up some waffles," he licked his lips in utter delight and had a fork n his other hand at the ready.
"Yeah, she even remembered to make tofu things for me," Beast Boy sidled up behind Robin and pushed his leader towards the table. "She's really going all out." As he was sitting down, Beast Boy missed the knowing glance Robin threw at Raven, who's back was turned to her teammates as she moved around busy-bodily, more concerned about how her food turned out than their petty conversation.
"It was... a difficult night last night, yes? For all of us." Star, as she was wont to do, made sure to be as near to Robin as she could. He could only glance at her from behind his mask and for the first time was unable to bring himself to at least put a comforting hand -- no matter how insincere or false -- onto her shoulder.
Cyborg nodded, capturing Robin's gaze and the boy-wonder found he could not break the semi-android's gaze as his mismatched eyes serched him, feeling violated in two entirely different ways. "You'll want to keep the training down too, man, I don't want to risk any major heart problems."
"I know my limits," Robin said, meeting all three of their gazes, "I've learned my lesson, repeatedly enough. I can't risk my obsessions. It wouldn't be good for the team."
"Or you." That dry, slitely raspy voice hit him and his eyes shot to her. She was carrying over the food, almost a banquet for the titans. She brought the rest by her mind, as she calmly sipped on herbal tea. "Obsessions are normally unhealthy, but you've been known to borderline fatal."
He frowned at her, taking a bite of the blueberry waffle that Star had eagerly placed on his plate, along with sausage, eggs, a tofu-muffin, bacon and a spoonful of fruit salad. He was loath to admit it, but she was right of course. The first time nearly proved so with his teammates and this time with himself. Either way, there would have been blood spilled... onto his hands.
"Will you be accompanying us to the mall of shopping, Robin?" Starfire asked hopefully and cheerily between bites of mustard-coated waffles.
"I think I'll stay here, Star. Like Cyborg said, I shouldn't risk any heart problems." He had added that reproachfully, though laced his voice with the sense of nothing amiss and began to angrily gnaw on his sausage.
"Would you wish me to stay?" Starfire's emerald eyes shone as she stared at him, trying to search him as she had done n the past so many times, but always got the same results: nothing but a startlingly white abyss.
"I think the quiet will do me some good, I didn't sleep well last night." A full out lie, he had slept better than he had days. He twirled the thought about in his mind of making a habit out of last night's proceedings.
"But Robin, what if -."
"I'll be here, Star," Raven said, eyes locking onto Robin as they had done the previous night. Searching and searching, trying to push through the wild vines and attacking thorn bushes to find the center of his being, to violate him once more. Although he no longer felt her presence still inside him, he felt just as naked and exposed to her when she stared right into his eyes. He tried to comfort himself by repeating that she couldn'tsee anything more than the rest of his teammates and Raven trying to figure him out should be no more unnerving as Star's own attempts.
But then again, Raven was capable of far more than Star. She had proved that in multiple ways.
He smirked triumphantly, pouring himself coffee and drinking it black. He flipped through his memory files and removed what he knew of Raven and looked through it greedily. She couldn't do anything without repercussions.
Relax, his mind said, You've always been able to trust her before, why so paranoid now? She's still Raven, you're still Robin, and she hasn't done anything a good teammate wouldn't do. You're both fine, so chill.
Then why didn't it feel like it?
Cyborg stood up, dragging away a complaining Beast Boy from his half-eaten plate, "C'mon, Star, we wanna get there early."
"Yeah!" Beast Boy turned into a dog and began to nudge Starfire out of her seat. After complying with a few giggles and high-pitched squeaks, Beast Boy returned to normal state, "They've got the new Zombies from Mars III out!" He did an imitation and began to stalk around the room, "Braaaaiiiinnn," he drooled, eyes swirling crazily around in his head.
"All right, ya'll, you ready?" Cyborg stood out the door, and Beast Boy pounced on him as a leopard before leaping away merrily towards the garage. Cyborg quickly ran after him, yelling empty threats.
Star stalled as she floated away, glancing between her remaining teammates. "Robin, you are sure?"
He waved her off, flashing her that special soft smile he reserved only for her, "Of course, Star. I can take care of myself."
A low, but in no means timid, snort erupted in the following second of silence. Robin heard his neck creak as he slowly looked over at Raven, who was looking right back at him completely unperturbed. She quirked an eyebrow and tilted her head in Starfire's direction.
"Raven, you will contact me if... something were to... happen, yes?"
"Of course, Star," Raven broken Robin's intense glare, he felt he would spontaneously combust in a moment. "Now go, before Cyborg leaves without you."
"Oh!" With a squeak and a flash of bright red hair, Star was gone, leaving the human and the demon-halfling alone.
--End Chapter One--
1. I, myself, took the word 'grebnaks' for breasts. I'm a pervy-perv!
Author's Note: :::hides in shame/embarrassment::: dear god, where is the characterization?? WHERE?? I'm so sorry that the characters are horribly marred, and my god, is Cyborg hard to write for! Well... I know it's a lame excuse the mall thing to get the others out of the way, but... no, there is no excuse sigh... Again, sorry for all of them being so OOC, especially Robin. and for any typos!
-Holly