"Hey," Tony said softly, "Any news?"
Zoe shook her head. "Nothing. The police say that the chances for her still being alive are very low."
Tony put his head in his hand. "Oh God..."
"It's not fair... I was so looking forward to the three of us being a proper family, and then we were just about to get you back they just had to take her away... Why do bad things like this keep happening to us? Why can't they happen to someone else for a change?"
"I don't know, Zoe..."
"And why can't they just let you out of prison one month early so I can at least have you? One month out of twenty years, that's nothing!"
"It doesn't work like that, Zoe, you know that. I'll be out soon, and the absolute first thing I am going to do is to hug you as hard as I can. Just hang on a little longer, alright?"
"Alright... It's just, I feel so alone. I mean, Grandma calls to make sure I'm okay and that I'm going to school and stuff, and Aunt Julie stops by and she's even paying the rent for me... but I just want Mom."
"I know, sweetheart, I know you do... Just remember that however small the chances are for her being alright, there is still a chance. We could still get her back at any time."
"It's not very likely, though, is it?"
"That's not the point. The point is that it is not impossible."
Even though I've pretty much accepted that she's not coming back, because since when do miracles happen for me?
Zoe nodded slowly. "I guess... but it's almost Christmas time, Dad! I can't celebrate Christmas without Mom! Christmas is supposed to be happy, and all it's gonna be now is painful." She was getting very close to tears.
"Listen, Zoe, I know it'll be hard, but you have to try. Your mom wouldn't want you to have a bad Christmas, no matter what happened to her."
"But I keep thinking about all the things that could've happened to her, and I keep having these dreams where she's about to die and I can't save her..."
I've been having those dreams for the last twenty years... but then I always woke up knowing that she was alright...
"I know, me too... we just have to believe that they'll go away with time."
"Just like the likelihood that she's alive."
...which is pretty much nil already.
Tony shook his head. "No. That may get smaller, but it'll never go away. You could wake up one day when you're married with two kids and she'll be there on your doorstep."
"I don't think so, Dad..."
"Well, I do. And I will be there on your doorstep in one month, and I will do my very best to find out what happened to her. And we still have a visit a few days before that as well, if you want."
Zoe sighed, but nodded and gave him a small smile. "Dad," she said after a moment, "Tell me a story about her?"
Tony smiled too. "Which one do you want me to tell? The first meeting? The proposal? The wedding? The chocolate-covered briefcase?"
"Tell me one you haven't told me before."
"Alright..." Tony thought for a moment, trying to recall what he hadn't told her and what might make her feel better. Make them both feel better.
"Well..." he said... And then he remembered something that always made him smile. "It was your mom's birthday, her first birthday since we'd started dating, and I'd bought her some really great presents and lots and lots of chocolate, and we were gonna go home and have a romantic evening of me pampering her as much as I possibly could... and then I had to work late. She decided to stay and wait for me, so she sat in my office eating her chocolates and reading a month-old magazine she'd found at somebody's desk. Eventually she made me take a break and we had take-out pizza and coffee instead of the romantic meal I had planned. And then I asked her if she was having second thoughts about getting involved with the boss, and she just smiled that dazzling smile of hers and said, 'Not for a second.'"
"Aw..." Zoe smiled. "Mom's so cute when she's happy."
"Yeah," said Tony. "Yeah, she is."