Disclaimer: I take no credit for the cover, nor for the properties of Elden Ring and the Leagend of Zelda
As the tall scarlet-haired woman stood over the fading corpse of her foe, she couldn't help but sigh. It had been the 5th bout this day after this foolish Tarnished had first disturbed her slumber. She was tired, oh so tired even though it had been- she couldn't remember how long since she had fought her half-brother, General Radahn, to a standstill in Caelid, forcing her to use her curse to end their struggle. Her mind was numb, her body sore as the scarlet rot slowly ate away at her flesh and mind while her gold prosthetics chaffed. Now she had this foolish mortal to deal with, who had constantly managed to be the most obnoxious opponent she had yet faced, with the man making crude comments and insulting her dignity as he "attempted" to avoid her blows. But, just as she was thinking of sitting back in her chair and removing at least her sword arm. Her thoughts again turned to her twin brother, Miquella. "Oh dear brother, once I've rested more, I promise, I will find you," she sounded uncharacteristically weak as she said this. Then, not a moment after, she nearly collapsed as she put out a hand to stop herself, her head aching as a powerful voice wailed in her aching mind. Her face clenched as pain ripped through her back, her closed eyes watering as she repeated one singular phrase: "I am Malenia, Blade of Miquella," only stopping when she heard the clinking of plate armour, and she turned to find several of her loyal knights running over to her.
"My lady, we heard a disturbance-" the lead cleanrot knight paused when he saw her gaze at him with her half-shut golden eyes. Then, without wasting another second, he and the others ran over to her with the knight extending an armoured hand, which Malenia refused as she slowly stood up. Once she was on her golden feet, he and the other knights quickly bent a knee.
"We have failed you, lady Malenia," they said in discorded unison.
She bent over and picked up her helmet, which had fallen off during her most recent episode, before turning to her faithful. "Rise," she commanded, this time in her typical regal tone. The three knights all rose to their feet. Their glazed eyes stared at her from behind the bars of their visors. "How did this happen?" she asked as she gestured to the bloodstain on the floor.
"He ambushed us, my lady," replied the lead knight.
"I see," she replied in an understanding tone. After all, these were her knights, and they would never admit failure lightly. They had been hand-picked not just for their devotion but also for their prowess in battle. Unfortunately, her best knight, Finlay, the most devoted of all, had vanished after carrying her back from Caelid. When she awoke briefly, her other knights informed her that the woman had set out alone in search of Malenia's brother, only to never hear from her again. At this time, she wished she hadn't, as the knightess would have been invaluable for the defence of the Haligtree against this Tarnished menace, but, alas, she was still asleep when all this took place. However, just as she saw the fog gate at the entrance to her alcove, something strange happened: The world around her vanished, the floor disappeared, and before she knew it, Malenia felt herself fall. She didn't scream, although she could faintly hear the wails of her knights.
Suddenly, the world returned to light, and Malenia found herself standing beside her knights as she turned to see that the Tarnished had returned, and it seemed he'd brought company. While the one she had fought previously sat down beside the wall in the furthermost corner from her. The loincloth-clad man he brought with him seemed confused, his dual katanas held at the ready while his pot-covered head swivelled as though he was looking for something. Thinking that perhaps her enemy was blind, she quietly walked over before dashing, her long sabre held at the ready. Then when she was in range, she committed to her infamous fountain of blows on the man, and as the blade touched him, it passed straight through. But, instead of being splattered with the blood of her foe, there was nothing. He didn't sidestep, roll, or even attempt to counter or block. He just stood there as she cut into him countless times, only to find that her infamous blade did not affect him. She pulled back as she considered what had just happened. The man was still standing, looking for something, as though he didn't even acknowledge her existence. She scowled as she tried to think of another way to get his attention. After all, one should never ignore a lady, especially if that lady was her. So, she straightened her posture and loudly proclaimed: "How dare you ignore the Blade of Miquella!" she ran over, intending to strangle him, but when her hand should have met his neck. Instead, she ran right through him as though she were a ghost.
As Malenia was trying to comprehend what just happened, the man in the loincloth turned to the armoured man sitting in the corner with a concerned gaze. "Hey man, I'm sorry to tell you this, but I don't think Malenia is here-" he paused as, suddenly, words erupted over her head in a tongue she did not understand. Her brother had always been better at that sort of thing anyway.
"Wait, we won!?" asked the armoured man as he stood up from his seat before jumping up and pumping a fist.
Malenia tore off her helmet as her eyes widened in shock and fury at his declaration. How dare he claim that he had felled her when she still stood tall.
"Huh, maybe it's a bug," said the man in the loincloth while she fumed obscenities. She charged and tried to attack them both to no avail, all while her knights looked on in concern while she continued to lose any sense of regality or form. Malenia attacked like an unhinged beast, dashing around the room, slashing her sword with a fury that not even Radahn had felt. This situation went beyond any insult, slight, or pain she had known previously. She felt almost as furious as when she had learned of her brother's kidnapping, and these two fools walked around as though they had accomplished anything while she still could fight. Then, as her fury boiled over, her mind filled with thoughts of the unthinkable, to Blume into the goddess of rot and display to these mortals precisely what she did to Caelid and her half-brother. It would destroy everything, and there'd be no possible way for them to survive the rot which would blanket everything.
As these thoughts came to her, she could feel the pain in her back return and the voices urging her onward. Even while she could see her opponents speaking to each other, the numbing ache prevented her from hearing them, her rage only growing as she watched them celebrate. Then, without warning, she stopped and fell to her knees as the pain became unbearable, and, with a final grunt, she bloomed. Slowly, a massive scarlet lotus began to sprout from her back, ripping away her blouse as it expanded, tears falling from her eyes as everything became enveloped in bright light. Even as her knights ran over to her, they too faded into the light before everything went dark again.
As a young man pressed the off button of his PS4, he couldn't help but feel elated. Not only had one of the most infamous bosses in Elden Ring suddenly and miraculously glitched out, but the game had proclaimed him the victor. "I can't wait to tell my friends!" he said before rushing into the other room to get his phone- before stopping to check on his younger brother, who sat with a Wii remote in hand with his eyes fixed on the screen in front of him. As he turned, he sighed and shook his head while chuckling. "I can't believe you're still playing that," he said as he watched a green-clad man with pointy ears riding a horse fighting his way through a horde of goblin-looking creatures riding giant boars.
"What? Twilight Princess is a classic," his brother rebuked as he continued to play. The older boy shook his head and was about to pick up his phone when his brother called: "What is that!?"
The boy turned his head to find his brother staring wide-eyed at the screen, only to find a ray of crimson light had appeared over Hyrule Castle, only to disappear a moment later. "Huh, wired. I've never seen anything like that happen before," he said as he stroked his chin, shrugging his shoulders and walking over to the cabinet where his phone was charging. "Maybe it's a glitch? I don't know," he finished.
However, neither one saw the faint flash of scarlet in the distance, which plummeted toward Hyrule Castle. "I can't wait to get this part over. Then it's onto Lake-Bed Temple," the younger boy said while continuing the escort mission.