Disclaimer: In very flat tone I do not own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing.

AN: So I haven't gotten lots of reviews yet and I'm bummed:( Don't you guys like my story???

Well I'll just keep writing, even if I only have a total of dundundundun 2 review. Okay so in this chappie, there will be some Darien bashing Takes baseball bat and stars hitting Darien And just to tell you, the humor will start in the following chapters. The first chapters were like general but now we'll get into the funny stuff. And I would also like to thank a certain author ( Don't know her pen name but she knows who she is ) for giving me this idea for a story. And lastly, I'm not very good with Homophones so please cope with that two !!!!!! lol ON WITH THE FIC ! READY MEN CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!!Rated PG13 for cursing. Sorry I haven't updated lately but I just kinda got tired of writing if you guys know what I mean, so I'm going to make this chapter a long one. ( Well I'll try to )

Life or Death

Chapter 3

"OUCH!!!! Hey man, what's your problem!!" Duo stated as Darien continued to swat at him with a stick. "Get up you sorry ass. We don't have all day." Darien said as he continued to use Duo as a piñata. "Okay man, cool your jets, I'm up I'm up." Duo stood up extremely slowly and looked around. They were surrounded by palm trees and sand. "Great!!! Today I just had to get stuck on an island with the likes of you. What was the deal with Serena any ways. It's bad enough you won't leave her alone, but then you have to try and drown her to!" Duo exclaimed at the pathetic excuse for a man that stood slouched before him. "Stay out of my business kid. Serena's mine, she belongs to-" but Darien was cut off by a soft moan and grunting. Both men turned around and saw a small woman with short sea blue hair. Or as we all know, Amy. Her small eyes fluttered open as she bolted into a sitting position and exclaimed. "Oh my gosh am I alive !!If I am, has anyone seen my dildo!? It was with me when I was swimming and I don't know where it is now!" Amy said dramatically as she started to wander around looking for her '' precious item ''. Duo and Darien just looked at her in a very strange way as the girl suddenly emerged from the bushes. "AHA! I knew I would find it." she exclaimed as she hugged the item close to her body and started to talk to it, just like you would to your pets. Both men were now gawking at Amy, until a new voice reached their ears. "Oh, daddy won't like the idea of me getting my best suit all dirty in this sand." Again both men turned around to come face to face with another 'man'. "Oh thank goodness I found you people. My names Quater, Quater Winner and because my servants seemed to die on the plane, you get the honors of doing whatever I say. So I command you to get me off of this island or I'll sue!!!" Quater stated with confidence as Duo shoved him in the sand. "Look pal, don't you think that maybe we might want to get off of the island too, or are you just to selfish to think of anyone else ? Man, I was going to LA to get a record deal, and I end up lost on a island with a pitiful excuse, a sex crazed lesbian AND a daddies boy!!! My life sucks." Duo stated as he sat back down on the sand. "What to do now ? We could stay here and see if anyone finds us, or maybe we should go looking for Heero and the girls." Duo stated off his options to himself as everyone waited for their game plan. "Okay, it's settled, we go looking for my three friends. They must be on this island somewhere." Duo said as he started off his journey to find his friends, but was stopped by a hand placed firmly over his shoulders. "Who made you the leader all of a sudden! I could be a better leader then you any day." Darien said as Duo turned to face him. He had an amused look on his face. "Okay Darien, if you think your man enough, then you can lead us." Darien then proceeded to march in the other direction. Everyone followed Darien as he continued to march. He stopped and smelt the air and turned to the left. 'He's just getting us lost.' Duo thought as he followed Darien. Suddenly, Darien screamed and Duo raced forwards. What he saw made him fall to the ground laughing. Of coarse he didn't mean to just start to laugh when someone needed help but how many times do you see Darien Shields, fraying about in a pit of quick sand. "So do you still think your a fearless leader ?" Duo asked trying to hold in his laughter as Darien was yelping like a little girl. He had his hands fraying about him and was just sinking into the deep substance. "SAVE ME!! I WANT MY MOMMY!!" Darien yelled as he was buried up to his neck in quick sand. By the time Duo laughter had subsided, Darien was already buried under the wet and sticky sand. "Well so much for our famous leader. Common people, lets go this way." Duo said as they turned around and started to walk in the other direction. (AN: I know that when someone is sinking in quick sand, someone would start laughing. It's stupid I know but please cope with it!)

"Ugh. I don't think were ever going to bump into someone else you guys. Can't we take a break, please!!!! I mean, we have been walking for almost an hour." Mina complained to the two others she was following. You see, after Mina had woken up, she found a scary looking man lying on the cold surface of the small island. His hair was covering one eye and he seemed to be obsessed with leather. After he woke up, he told her his name was Trowa. By that time she had also found Heero. He was a little banged up, but he was alright. They had decided to go looking for other passengers and had now been walking for a very long time. "We should keep going, you never know, someone could be hurt." Heero stated as they continued their walk around the island but stopped abruptly after they herd a scream coming towards them. The two men got into a denfensive stance infront of Mina, and to Heero and Mina, the voice sounded somewhat familiar.

"AHHHHHHHHH. Somebody HELP!!!" prayed the feminine voice, then suddenly Serena emerged from the bushes and clobbered Heero to the ground. She was followed by two other females and the third one they couldn't tell what sex it was. Both of the other girls had a look of courage in their eyes, while Serena was scared shitless. "Oh thank god Heero it's you, there's this sand monster chasing us all around the island! You have to kill it." Serena said in her state of panic. Then once again, something emerged from the bushes moaning and groaning. It was very tall looking creature and was covered from head to toe in sand. It was walking towards Serena and she let out another ear piercing scream and ran over to Mina and hugged her tightly. To everyone's suprise, Heero pulled out a gun and aimed it at the creature. "I will kill you." he said solemnly. Then the thing started to spit out sand. It took its hands and wiped its face off to reveal the angered face of Darien Shields. "I am NOT a monster! Sigh I was leading Duo, Amy and Quarter through the island to look for other passengers because Duo was to scared of being on a stranded island, to take the role as leader. After walking for about a half an hour, we came across a patch of sinking sand. Duo was right about to fall in, so I shoved him aside and fell in myself. They left me there to die but I was lucky that I'm very smart and grabbed onto a vine that was close by and pulled myself up when I saw Serena and tried to tell her that it was me." Darien sighed again. "I feel bad for Duo, he must be so lost and scared." Darien was about to continue, but a voice stopped him. "Hey Shields, get your lie straight."

Duo, Amy and Quater emerged from the bushes. "DUO!!" Serena exclaimed as she ran towards him and hugged him with all her might. "Ah Serena, I really missed you to but, I can ..... 't breath." Duo spat out as Serena let go of him, her cheeks turning a light shade of pink. "Duo, did you really leave Darien in the quick sand ?" she asked him and he got a very offended look on his handsome face and declared "Yes I did but it wasn't intentional, and no I was NOT scared! Common me scared, I don't think so. Mr. Hero here was almost peeing his pants when he wasn't watching were he was going and FELL into the sand. He was moving around to much, I wouldn't of been able to save him anyways. I still don't know how he got out of the pit without anyone's help." At hearing this, Serena turned around and was about to slap him but decided that now was not the time for abuse, but that didn't mean she couldn't put him in his place now did it ? "Darien, I told you once never to lie to me, but I guess some things don't change. I thought it would stop after I had caught you with Rita. I thought you would change then but no, you just went right on back to your other women, and left me all alone. You don't deserve me, and you never did. Darien Shields, when we get off of this island, you are going to leave me alone for the rest of your life. I don't want to EVER see your sorry ass EVER AGAIN!!!! Is that clear ?" Serena asked. She was just a little pissed at how after all those years of false promises, lies and other women he wasn't about to stop any of it. After the small nod from his head, she turned to everyone else to find a slight bit of shock on their faces. Some because of her passed relations with Mr.Shields that had been reveald, and some because by the end of her speech, she was so loud they wouldn't be suprised if Honkong had herd her heart moving speech. "What ?" she asked everyone in an irritated tone of voice. Everyone turned and started to talk about their own business, which was pretty much how to get off of the island. "This is everyone right ? All the passengers are here ?" asked Mina, looking around and counting everyone. "Okay, this is everyone so, what do you guys think we should do now ?" asked Rei from her spot behind Amy. "We'll set up camp over by the shore lines and make our descitions when we have some sort of shelter for us all to stay in. Something tells me were going to be here for a while." Duo said thoughtfully and everyone agreed, except for Darien, who said that they should look around the island to try and see if they were the only ones on the island. He thought maybe there would be some villagers near by, but everyone dismissed his idea and followed Duo.

Once they had made it to the shore lines, Heero took charge again and ordered everyone to find certain things. "Okay, Rei, Amy and Quarter, you guys go look for something edible for us to eat. Lita, Wufei and Trowa, go and find fire wood. Serena, Mina and Duo, you guys find things we can use to build a shelter and Darien, you stay with me and help build a fire pit, and maybe you should wash yourself off to. Alright so does everyone know what their doing ?" Heero asked while looking around. At everyone's nod, they all parted to do what they were assigned to do.

AN: I know I told you guys I would try and make it longer but I'm having readers block. I know what's going to happen and a killer kills people, but I just don't know how I'm going to get the characters into their situations!! Oh, and by the way, the murders won't start for a while, like once the shelter is built and their on the island for a few days. Well R&R