By the way everybody, I am now posting my original novels on fictionpress, as foxfirelightswitch. I would really appreciate people reading those, too.... :)

Chapter Eleven: The Real Reality Overlap

"Rainbows are really cool," said Carl dreamily.

"Hmm?"

"So are squirrels."

"SQUIRRELS?"

"You got a problem with squirrels?"

"SQUIRRELS?"

"Squirrels are cute. They have bushy tails and perky little ears and they hide nuts."

"SQUIRRELS?"

"And they eat sheet-rock. No, wait. That's not right. Termites eat sheet-rock. Squirrels eat— squirrels eat— what do squirrels eat—"

"SQUIRRELS?"

"We had a real problem with termites eating the sheet-rock at the Vati— vat— vashicam— um— "

"SQUIRRELS?"

"Would you stop screaming SQUIRRELS, Van Helsing?"

"Where are the squirrels?"

"There aren't any."

Van Helsing grasped Carl by the nonexistent lapels of his robes. "Where are the squirrels?"

"Um— over there." Carl pointed in a corner. Van Helsing let go of him and ran for it.

"SQUIRRELS?"

"Decoupage!" said Carl triumphantly. "Squirrels eat decoupage! Also long hair if they're hungry enough," he added, causing instant panic on Van Helsing's part. Van Helsing grabbed at his hat and pulled it down over his ears.

"They're not gonna get my hair," he mumbled.

"That's alright," said Carl, "I was just making it up. Hmm. Knights errant. Turtles. Pea soup and peanut butter. Do you know, I think I'm still a bit drunk?"

"Do your Faramir voice," said Van Helsing, forgetting instantly about the squirrels.

"Why should I?"

"Do your Faramir voice, or I shall remember about the squirrels, and then you will be sorry."

"To entah the forbidden pool bears the penalty of death," said Carl, darkly and With Angst. Van Helsing laughed and clapped. "Listen to this— Faramir! Eowyn. Faramir! Eowyn.... Faaaramiiir! Eeeeeowyyynnn...."

Van Helsing laughed till he choked.

Suddenly the door banged open and Frankenstein ran in.

"Which way to Dracula's Castle?" he asked.

"The Frankenstein Monster!" howled Van Helsing and Carl.

Frankenstein looked extremely unhappy. He bit his lip and began to sniff. "I really hate it when people do that. I have a name of my own, you know."

"Really?" asked Carl. "What is it?"

"Duncan," said the Frankenstein Monster. "Duncan Hines Frankenstein."

"That's funny," said Van Helsing, and began to laugh.

"No its not!"

"Actually, I have to agree with Van Helsing, it is kind of funny," said Carl, "but that's only because we are drunk. Excuse me a minute, won't you?" He laughed for about five minutes, rolling on the floor. Frankenstein frowned at them.

"I need to get to Dracula's Castle," he said.

"What's your hurry?" asked Van Helsing, giving him, for no apparent reason, his famous One-Eyebrow-Raised Look, which is currently undergoing copyright transfer from Sean Connery.

"They're about to use Anna to turn all Drac's children into Teletubbies. I can't let that happen."

"Why not?"

"Because I am in love with her. Also I hate Teletubbies."

"When did you ever meet Anna?" Carl wanted to know. "Not that I'm jealous or anything. I'm just— curious, that's it, curious."

"She organized my fan club," said Frankenstein. "So will you help me get to Dracula's Castle in order to save the woman all three of us want to marry?"

Van Helsing and Carl looked at each other.

"We're going to need a carriage," said Van Helsing.

"Why?" asked Frankenstein.

"Because I don't want to carry all these bottles of vodka by myself!"

"Van Helsing, why don't we—" suggested Carl, "leave the vodka here."

Van Helsing stared at him. "WHAT?"

"Never mind," sighed Carl. "Go get the carriage."

"But we have no horses," said Frankenstein.

"Don't worry about it. We'll let Van Helsing pull. He's always boasting about having the strength of ten men anyway."

And so they set off in the carriage, passing another carriage going the other way—

"Hey, those people looked familiar," said Van Helsing, looking back after them.

"That's because they were us," said Carl calmly.

"What do you mean?"

"They were us in the fic "Big Bang Theory" headed back to London. Our realities overlapped, briefly."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Did we bring any vodka?" asked Van Helsing plaintively. "I don't think I can cope with all this right now."

"I know!" said Carl. "Lets have an extremely sudden endi—