CHAPTER 9: TO LOVE AND TO HATE
The small noise alerted the attention of all on the porch. It was completely dark outside and having someone come to the clinic this late usually meant danger or a serious accident. Sano stood and peered through the unrelenting darkness in a feeble attempt at making out who the intruder was.
"Who's there?" Sano called to the unknown stranger as Megumi lit a small lamp.
"It's been a long time, that it has." A voice cut through the dark. It was said so softly that that it could hardly be heard, but no one missed the sadness and regret laced within the words.
Kaoru tensed and her body shook. She knew who it was standing just a few feet away from her. It was a voice she never wanted to hear again. She had resigned herself a long time ago to the fate that had been bestowed upon her at such a young age. She had, on the surface of her mind, long forgotten about it all and she had never intended for it to resurface. All of the memories came flooding back in rushing waves, whether she willed them to or not. He couldn't be here. He was supposed to be dead. Buried six feet under with no way of coming back. She wasn't supposed to see him ever again. But now, here he was standing no more than five feet in front of her.
Kaoru forced herself to turn her gaze towards Kenshin. By now a lamp had been lit and everyone was silent. No one knew what to say. Jiro didn't know what was going on and Sano and Megumi were too dumbstruck to say anything.
"Why?" Everyone's eyes turned to Kaoru who had broken the silence. Her gaze had never left Kenshin's face. She had gotten over her surprise and it was now replaced with anger. Anger at Kenshin for waiting ten years to come back. For breaking his promise. For coming back after she had been living her life so normally for so long.
"Why what Kaoru?" Sano asked the question quietly after several agonizing minutes of silence.
"Why did you come back?" Her voice rose in volume with each word, the harsh tone so out of place in the calm darkness. The answer to Sano's question was clearly directed at Kenshin.
The regret shown clearly in Kenshin's eyes but he didn't answer. To tell the truth he really didn't know why he had come back.
"You know what? I don't even want to know." Her voice wavered slightly on the last few words as she struggled to keep control of her emotions. Without another word she turned and swiftly went inside slamming the door behind her. Jiro looked from Kenshin, to Sano, and to the door questioningly before going inside to check on Kaoru.
*-*-*-*
Kaoru sat underneath the oh-so-famous window. It was her place of solitude, no matter how much she hated the person that had made this place so special to her. She rested her head on her knees as she cried. The tears came mostly from the anger and hate she held for Kenshin. His arrival upset her entire mental balance in which she had hidden herself within for all these years. Now she didn't know how to handle it.
She heard the door open and a pair of strong arms wrap around her shaking frame. She knew it was Jiro and she held onto him like a lifeline. He didn't know what was going on and she was grateful that he didn't. She needed someone to tell, to spill out all of the pain that had built up over the last ten years. So she began, without preamble, her voice slightly muffled in the fabric of his gi.
"He saved me you know. Ten years ago he saved me from a man named Shinji. He beat me all the time and Kenshin came across us once and caught him. After he saved me he was so kind to me. He was the first decent person I had ever met in my life. I loved him like a brother. I spent a little over four months with him on our way to Tokyo."
She paused a moment as the anger pushed away the sadness in her voice.
"Then he left. He promised me, more than once, that he would never leave me. He said he would be back in a week. Instead he took ten years. We all thought he was dead. It was in the papers and we never received a letter from him. What were we to believe? It took me nearly a year to get past all of the betrayal he had left me with. After I turned nine I was finally able to start forgetting most of it, and get past it. I've hated him since." She had summarized the basis of it in just a few minutes but it didn't seem to help her any as she buried her face into his shoulder and cried some more.
Jiro wasn't sure what to do. He couldn't say it would be okay because that would most likely upset her more. He didn't know much about the situation, save for what Kaoru had just told him. So he did the only thing he could do, held her until she fell asleep against him.
*-*-*-*
Outside on the porch what was left of their group looked back and forth at each other in an uncomfortable silence. The quiet was unbearable but no one could find anything to say to push away the silence or squelch the tension in the air. That is until Kenshin let out a cough and spoke.
"I never meant for this to happen." His told them of his sincerity.
"We know Kenshin. But Kaoru doesn't." Sano replied looking at the other man with understanding. It would take a long time for Kaoru to come around.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
I don't think this is quite long enough but I didn't want to make you guys wait any longer. This would've been up a while back but after I posted the author's note my teachers swamped me with projects and I haven't had much free time. I have another big one due sometime at the first of November (I think O.o). As soon as I finish I'll update again. *gives all of her reviewers various plushies from her collection* Until then snuggle these plushies ^^'
The small noise alerted the attention of all on the porch. It was completely dark outside and having someone come to the clinic this late usually meant danger or a serious accident. Sano stood and peered through the unrelenting darkness in a feeble attempt at making out who the intruder was.
"Who's there?" Sano called to the unknown stranger as Megumi lit a small lamp.
"It's been a long time, that it has." A voice cut through the dark. It was said so softly that that it could hardly be heard, but no one missed the sadness and regret laced within the words.
Kaoru tensed and her body shook. She knew who it was standing just a few feet away from her. It was a voice she never wanted to hear again. She had resigned herself a long time ago to the fate that had been bestowed upon her at such a young age. She had, on the surface of her mind, long forgotten about it all and she had never intended for it to resurface. All of the memories came flooding back in rushing waves, whether she willed them to or not. He couldn't be here. He was supposed to be dead. Buried six feet under with no way of coming back. She wasn't supposed to see him ever again. But now, here he was standing no more than five feet in front of her.
Kaoru forced herself to turn her gaze towards Kenshin. By now a lamp had been lit and everyone was silent. No one knew what to say. Jiro didn't know what was going on and Sano and Megumi were too dumbstruck to say anything.
"Why?" Everyone's eyes turned to Kaoru who had broken the silence. Her gaze had never left Kenshin's face. She had gotten over her surprise and it was now replaced with anger. Anger at Kenshin for waiting ten years to come back. For breaking his promise. For coming back after she had been living her life so normally for so long.
"Why what Kaoru?" Sano asked the question quietly after several agonizing minutes of silence.
"Why did you come back?" Her voice rose in volume with each word, the harsh tone so out of place in the calm darkness. The answer to Sano's question was clearly directed at Kenshin.
The regret shown clearly in Kenshin's eyes but he didn't answer. To tell the truth he really didn't know why he had come back.
"You know what? I don't even want to know." Her voice wavered slightly on the last few words as she struggled to keep control of her emotions. Without another word she turned and swiftly went inside slamming the door behind her. Jiro looked from Kenshin, to Sano, and to the door questioningly before going inside to check on Kaoru.
*-*-*-*
Kaoru sat underneath the oh-so-famous window. It was her place of solitude, no matter how much she hated the person that had made this place so special to her. She rested her head on her knees as she cried. The tears came mostly from the anger and hate she held for Kenshin. His arrival upset her entire mental balance in which she had hidden herself within for all these years. Now she didn't know how to handle it.
She heard the door open and a pair of strong arms wrap around her shaking frame. She knew it was Jiro and she held onto him like a lifeline. He didn't know what was going on and she was grateful that he didn't. She needed someone to tell, to spill out all of the pain that had built up over the last ten years. So she began, without preamble, her voice slightly muffled in the fabric of his gi.
"He saved me you know. Ten years ago he saved me from a man named Shinji. He beat me all the time and Kenshin came across us once and caught him. After he saved me he was so kind to me. He was the first decent person I had ever met in my life. I loved him like a brother. I spent a little over four months with him on our way to Tokyo."
She paused a moment as the anger pushed away the sadness in her voice.
"Then he left. He promised me, more than once, that he would never leave me. He said he would be back in a week. Instead he took ten years. We all thought he was dead. It was in the papers and we never received a letter from him. What were we to believe? It took me nearly a year to get past all of the betrayal he had left me with. After I turned nine I was finally able to start forgetting most of it, and get past it. I've hated him since." She had summarized the basis of it in just a few minutes but it didn't seem to help her any as she buried her face into his shoulder and cried some more.
Jiro wasn't sure what to do. He couldn't say it would be okay because that would most likely upset her more. He didn't know much about the situation, save for what Kaoru had just told him. So he did the only thing he could do, held her until she fell asleep against him.
*-*-*-*
Outside on the porch what was left of their group looked back and forth at each other in an uncomfortable silence. The quiet was unbearable but no one could find anything to say to push away the silence or squelch the tension in the air. That is until Kenshin let out a cough and spoke.
"I never meant for this to happen." His told them of his sincerity.
"We know Kenshin. But Kaoru doesn't." Sano replied looking at the other man with understanding. It would take a long time for Kaoru to come around.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
I don't think this is quite long enough but I didn't want to make you guys wait any longer. This would've been up a while back but after I posted the author's note my teachers swamped me with projects and I haven't had much free time. I have another big one due sometime at the first of November (I think O.o). As soon as I finish I'll update again. *gives all of her reviewers various plushies from her collection* Until then snuggle these plushies ^^'