I've actually decided to update! Wow, after what, like years? Ok, so here's the next chapter, I promise next time it won't take me so long to write! Yeah, so this chapter is a random funnyness chapter, I should get the next one out as soon as I can in something weeks. Until then, REVIEW! ...Please? (Sorry it's so short!)

Harry Potter and the other characters are obviously not owned by me, if they were, this story would probably be published worldwide, have as many fans, and have as many movies about it by now...Yeah, I don't own them.

Hermione grinned as she twirled her wand in her fingers reading the page. PMS sucks, but why do those boys never have to put up with it? Just why? Why?! WHY? Hermione wanted revenge and she wanted it NOW! Out of character, yes, but she didn't care. She was always the girl who was left behind to do all the book work, study this and that, write down the formulas here and there, and all of this many times under her "monthly condition"! All while the boys were goofing off swallowing their chocolate frogs. And this is just the LAST straw! She looked over the page again:

THAT Time of the Month Invoker! Now for Boys! (Girls use only)

Revenge is Best Served Cold With a Side of Chocolate Cake.

Why should men go through life scot-free? When women have all the troubles every lunar cycle? So when aches and pains get you down, pick yourself up when hilarity ensues when the boys discover the blissful panic of scrambling for maxi pads. This spell consists of two parts, one for gender transformation (can't have a cycle without a pouch, can you?) and one to get their hormones working faster (for immediate satisfaction). Also, located on page 362 is a way to transform them back (if you ever feel like it, that is).

Part I.

Tara Stillsky's Recipe for Gender Transmutation.

1 lock of hair of preferred victim (make sure it's a BOY! (and has reached puberty))

A small branch of rosemary

A stem of lavender (ONLY the stem!)

Take half of the lock of hair (you might need the other half later to turn him back) and set it on the branch of rosemary. Break the stem into small pieces and sprinkle them over the lock of hair. Tap your wand over the pile once and swish twice. The incantation is "Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum!"

The effect is immediate (it is powerful!), but the victim will not feel anything.

(Just be sure to be near when they go for the toilet, the results are quite amusing!)

And now that you have changed their gender, the next part is optional, as since their biology has been changed it will eventually take its course, but you can speed it up to within a day or so.

Part II.

Aches, Pains, and Pads, Oh My!

This part is simple, you already have all you need in front of you, now you just need a new incantation. (This will not work without the first spell!) Tap your wand once twice, once above the pile and once below and drag the point around the pile in a full clockwise circle. Say this twice afterward: "Dolores capitis non fero, eos do."

And you're done! The effect should take place in a day or so! Watch the hilarity as it ensues!

Hermione grinned again and copied the spell down in her notebook, she figured she'd go and look for the counter spell later. She sat back and thought for just a little bit. She never was one to whine and moan about these things before, so why start now? Then she remembered what Harry said.

"It's just a little blood."

Oh yeah, that's why. Yes, Harry and Ron have annoyed her at times, but why so much now? Oh yes, PMS.

Duh.

Let's get started now! Hermione stuffed her hair in a hat, covered most of her face and rushed over to the boys' tower to Harry and Ron's room. The door was closed. She put her ear to the door and listened in just to make sure that no one was there. But how far from the truth she was!

She could hear Ron and Harry talking and Freddy and George in the background too. Harry and Ron were…panting? What the heck are they doing?

Ron huffed. "C-come on Harry…one more time around…it'll be fun!" He sounded…tired?

"M-maybe…I'm…I'm not sure if…I can take it…" …So did Harry?

"Heh…tired out already? I thought you could handle it!"

"H-Hey! I can…go another round…Just let me catch my breath. This is just the roughest we've ever done this."

"Ha! You said you wanted to do it a lot rougher than last time! Where's that quidditch stamina?"

"I got your stamina right here!"

They were groaning! Her eyes nearly popped out of her head at what she heard…She never knew that…they…She shouldn't be listening…but…it was just so…wrongly delicious! But that was just gutter-mindedness creeping in…they might not really be doing that…are they? What naughty thoughts that crossed her mind. She forgot about Fred and George, and they were just egging them on.

"Yeah! Come on Harry, go for it again! Don't be a wuss!"

"Come on! Come on!"

She heard a thud and a louder groan.

"Ow! Ron! You're doing it too hard! My glasses keep falling off…"

"Heh, our wittle Ronny-bottoms has gotten better, hasn't he?"

"Yes, all those nights practicing with us really got him toughened up!"

Hermione clamped a hand over her mouth. No! No…they can't be really doing that! But she could be in denial. No! No! Bad thoughts…bad…thoughts. She ducked into the empty room across the hall.

She sat down and figured that when they get out, she'll get some hair then… Hermione shuddered and shook those thoughts out of her head, but she couldn't…and kind of liked it to stay there. She wasn't sure if she really liked it or not. No! Dirty...dirty thoughts!

Bwahaha.

She looked around and found that she was in George and Fred's room, no doubt. Pieces of failed prank toys and joke candy laid around the room. Hermione sat down on the floor by the bed and flicked away bits of scraps and paper. She saw the corner of a book peek from below the bed ruffles.

Hermione edged it out from under the bed with her fingertip and found it was a magazine.

It was a PlayWizard magazine.

The "Naughty Witches and their Wands!!!" issue.

And the witch on front was looking at her very suggestively while licking her wand.

She blinked and her mouth dropped. How could you sneak in these things?! Well, if no one else couldn't sneak something in, you know Fred and George could. She always thought about the possibility…and well, if they didn't make them now, they would eventually. It made sense. Magic pictures equals magic porn.

Hmm…Do they make PlayWitch magazines too?

URK! Oops, bad thoughts again.

There was a shuffling and she could hear the boys come out of Harry and Ron's room and walking to Fred and George's room! Hermione squashed herself behind the door and they stepped in with their backs turned to her. Ron and Harry were laughing saying how fun that was ("Ugh, I'm all sweaty now") and the twins said they loved to watch… Hermione made a face. She slipped away from the door and across the hall to Harry and Ron's room, shutting the door before she could hear:

"Wow! That was one heck of an arm-wrestling match!"

How was it? Pointers and stuff are freely welcomed.

Spell Translations:

"Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum!"

Translation: "A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants!"

"Dolores capitis non fero, eos do."

Translation: "I don't get headaches, I give them."