Last Resort

by Skyla1

A second chance to do things right this time, it was their last way out. No one said they wouldn't screw up along the way.

14. Close Enough

Disclaimer: Standard poverty claims

Chapter 14: Close enough

WARNING: A long hiatus leads to an extra long chapter. 38 pages of unadulterated drabble. Do not try to read in one sitting. Doing so may lead to serious eye strain... so says the author with the spiffy new pair of glasses hunched over her laptop typing away...

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"Didn't I tell you this place had the best pancakes in the city?" Thomas smirked. Beneath the golden rays of the sun pouring through the window falling on his slightly upturned face, Thomas stood out like a sore thumb in the small diner. He lay slack against the back of the booth with one arm leaning against the ledge of the window. His deep blue eyes reflected a sort of childish glee, watching the activity going on outside.

For a twenty-eight year old, Thomas had retained a perpetual lightheartedness that most people would have lost in the twists and turns of maturity. Most of the time he was mistaken for the typical American frat boy, who just happened to speak perfect fluent Japanese. He dressed in a simple t-shirt and faded jeans with a Boston Red Sox cap on his head. His skin had darkened a bit, tanning under the sun from all those Saturday morning basketball games the guys had. In a way, he never tried to fit in. He retained as much of his American heritage as possible, not feeling the slightest guilt when he showed up to his first Japanese baseball game complaining about the backward rules. Some looked on at him as the strange gaijin, a man lost in translation, but he never cared much for fitting in. That was one of the main reasons he went to Japan.

Yuuki took another big gulp from her glass of orange juice to ward off the immense heat emanating from outside. Even with the air conditioning on full blast, it felt like an inferno every time the door opened to the small eatery. She brought the glass up to her neck, pressing the cold condensation forming on the exterior of the glass to her warm skin.

Thomas watched her movements with avid interest. His breath hitched the second he saw her crane her head up, exposing her neck and sliding the glass against the skin. It didn't help much more when she let a small moan escape her mouth.

"I still can't believe this heat. I don't think I can take much more of it."

"Uh... yeah." He averted his eyes, focusing on the half-eaten plate in front of him. "So, have you decided what you want to do about my little proposal?"

She placed her glass onto the linoleum table and leaned backwards, sighing deeply. Her gaze shifted out the window with a slight wistfulness and emptiness in her expression. "It's rather pathetic," she snorted. "He doesn't even spare me a glance unless another man comes along. Do you know when I mentioned the prospect of you and I becoming an item, he took it badly? In some way, I'll always wonder if he took up the sudden interest because he was selfish and didn't want to lose me. I don't even know exactly what he sees me as, a friend or a lover. The line is so transparent nowadays. We step over it all the time without realizing it, with a simple brush against the arm or whisper in the ear. It makes it all the worse that what little I can have of him, I'm willing to take it." She smiled half- heartedly. "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'll take what little I can get from him for as long as he will have me. I'm insanely and ignorantly in love with Nishikado Soujiro, and he will be the death of me."

Thomas listened to her small impromptu speech, understanding quite well where the woman was coming from. It pained him a bit to see her lose all hope of anything remotely close to the ideals of love. What she had just described sounded more like the kind of love that has been bruised and beaten so many times that it's unrecognizable. Something inside of him wanted to make her see the world differently, see it as what it really is or could be.

"We love them blindly and that is enough for me."

She placed her hand over his, and gingerly rubbed her thumb over the back of his hand. "She cares for you more than you think."

Her hand was taken away, and he blinked, almost missing the flicker of hope in her eyes. His eyes remained downcast, trying to muster the look of reassurance.

"I don't know if what I feel for her is love. I don't even know what real love is. All I know is I've never felt more intensely for anyone in my life. When she smiles I know that everything is going to be okay. When she laughs I know the world is okay. She gives me a reason."

"So, I guess we should shake on this." He extended his hand and took hers in his, sealing the deal. "We might have some fun along the way, too."

She smirked, taking in the foreboding mischief. "Something tells me we'll be having a lot of that."

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The high-pitched voice of a child sang along with the repetitive chorus of one of her morning cartoons, oblivious to everything around her. It was a bit scary to watch her attempt to maneuver the piece of toast in her hand towards her mouth, showing great hand to eye coordination for a five year old, all while keeping her eyes trained on the television screen.

"A little to the left," Tsukasa mumbled to himself, watching Kaya engrossed by the television while eating her breakfast. He almost burst out in laughter when he saw the toast, splattered with thick amounts of jam, slam into her cheek.

"Kaya! Will you please just finish your food first? That's the fifth time you've missed your mouth. I think I'll need to shower you off before we leave the house today."

"Yes. Mama."

"Are you going to finish up your breakfast then?"

"Yes, Mama.'

Tsukushi noticed the pattern forming with her daughter's responses and decided to use it to her advantage. "So, you're okay with never ever watching TV again?"

"Yes, mama," she instantly replied. It took her a few minutes to register what the question was. "Wait! I'm not doing that!"

"Too bad, kid. You agreed to it," Tsukasa taunted. He shook his head. "It's a good thing too 'cause if I had to listen to one more winky dinky girly saving the world puppet or cartoon I'm gonna throw myself off the balcony."

Kaya jumped up from the floor and stomped over to the kitchen table, scowling. Feeling rather grumpy, she kicked him directly in the shin and stuck out her tongue. "I can watch whatever I want, Mr. Pineapple."

"So, we're back to Mr. Pineapple, huh?" he sighed. "Will you stop calling me that?!"

"No. That's what you are."

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!

"Geez, if I knew that taking you in would be like getting another child to take care of, I would have taken a second thought about the idea," Tsukushi screamed, exasperated by the two of them. "Finish your breakfast, you! Tsukasa, stop letting a five year old get to you."

"Fine," he groused, folding his arms across his chest, sulking.

"Fine," Kaya agreed, turning back towards her half finished breakfast.

"This is the last time I let you two stay up late like last night. The next morning you're both all grouchy." Tsukushi groaned to herself. Her eyes wearily drifted off to the stack of bills and paperwork she needed to tend to later that day. The little break they had all taken for the week was catching up on her, and the massive stack of things to do was about to topple over onto her.

"Change the channel already."

"No."

"Do it."

"No."

"Do it," Tsukasa ground out between his teeth while keeping a perfectly faked smile on his face. His head ached at the sound of tinkling bell-like voices coming from the box in front of Kaya. Another program featuring laughing, dancing, singing, colorful, and oversized puppet-like characters emerged on the screen.

"No," Kaya petulantly spouted back.

"Fine, I'll make you do it then." He lunged out of his seat with a devious glint in his eyes. His fingers wiggled, searching for their target.

"No!" Kaya squealed as she was pounced upon and pinned to the floor. She rolled back and forth as she was mercilessly tickled. Her labored breaths of laughter rang over the television.

"Now will you change the channel?!"

"No! Mama, help!"

Tsukushi peered over the newspaper she was reading, watching the two children wrestle on the floor. She shrugged her shoulders and grinned. "I can't save you every time."

"Mama!"

"Okay," she drawled out after a long pause. She slapped the newspaper onto the table, and took one last sip of her morning coffee. With a running start, she leapt on top of the pile of bodies and began tickling Tsukasa from behind.

"What?!" Tsukasa yelped in surprise. He rolled off of Kaya, and fell onto his back next to the kid. A large pillow hit him smack in the face, and Tsukushi stood over him, panting heavily.

"Oh, it's on now!" Tsukushi began pounding them both with the pillow in her hands, laughing maniacally. "Now will you two listen to me after I've beaten you both to a bloody pulp?"

Kaya turned to Tsukasa with wide eyes. The fear was evident in her face, knowing exactly how sadistic her mother could be with her pillow torture. "Run!"

From outside the apartment, the neighbors walking by could hear the sound of screams and pleas of mercy. However, they knew all too well to just ignore the strange sounds that came from within.

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Soujiro strolled half awake down the street, looking for the nearest place to eat. With the festering heat and lack of sleep, he was feeling less than his best at the moment. He shifted his shades, covering his eyes from the blistering rays of the sun, and peeked at the group of office ladies making their way to work in their short little business suit skirts. A few stopped to pass him a flirty wink and another, a bit more daring, slipped into his hand a piece of paper with her name and phone number scrawled in the flowery cursive of a woman's touch.

The small boost in his ego was fleeting when thoughts of the conversation that had taken place in his car flashed before him. The slip of paper was mercilessly crumpled in his palm as he clenched his fist.

Thomas and Yuuki, huh? I never saw that one coming. Last thing I heard Thomas was screwing one of his students in his class. He's always been one to sleep with the girls taking their English classes from him. I wonder what would happen if the program ever found out about his liaisons with these women. It could probably get his ass shipped back to America.

He shook his head roughly, dispelling those unseemly thoughts. It was really none of his business what his friends did on their free time.

Does Yuuki like him? They've never shown interest in each other before.

That was before she started dressing and acting the way she does now. Did you really think that she did it for only you, dumbass?!

No, I didn't mean it like that. She can do whatever she wants. She's a big girl now, and she doesn't need me like those days.

She's in love with you.

It's a crush.

Fine, then let Thomas have her. She won't wait for you forever. You sure as hell wouldn't wait for her.

There's nothing much to wait for in the first place. She deserves better. If Thomas is better then I'll be happy for her.

Then why are your hands itching to wring his neck?

"Shut up," he muttered to himself in pure frustration. A few heads turned to see the man caught so much in his own thoughts telling those imaginary voices in his head to quiet themselves. "Damn inner monologues."

In his fit of incoherent rambling, he barely noticed the direction in which he was headed nor the person walking in the opposite direction. Both seemed too lost in their own minds to notice the other as they headed for a straightforward collision.

"Oomph!" he groaned as something rather hard walked right into his chest. A sea of papers went flying up in the air, falling around them like sprinkling rain.

"Shit!" a high voiced scream screeched from the ground.

His line of vision barely left the sky as Soujiro made quick work to collect the fallen pieces of paper, trying his best not to let them stray too far. It was a comical sight to see the man chasing down the wayward sheets as they filtered across the pavement, the street, and in random places he didn't think they would be.

"I'm so sorry," he profusely apologized, trying to straighten out the sheets. He bent over while clutching the loose stack in his hands.

"Oh god!" She made a grab for the folders and papers, trying to shove them into the appropriate places, only causing further attention at the two of them as she sat spread out on the ground fumbling with her papers. "Please tell me I didn't lose the Kurata file!"

He didn't know quite what to do exactly. One, he could have just walked away, leaving the frantic woman to her own devices. Then there was option two, he could try to help her look for the file she was so desperately in need of. The answer came when he spotted what appeared to be a rather thick file hiding under a nearby bench. He walked away to retrieve it, and dangled the sought after item in front of her face. That was when he recognized her face for the first time.

Déjà vu.

His breath immediately hitched. The facade as an experienced man of the world with the flawless charm and impeccable confidence in air crumbled around him, leaving that awkward fifteen year old he hoped would never resurface.

"Sara," he gasped in disbelief. After briefly bumping into her a few weeks ago, he never thought he would see her again.

Her hands shot out and grabbed the missing file, and she hugged it to her chest, mumbling something about saving her job. When she heard her name being called out, she instinctively looked from the hand to the face.

"Soujiro!"

Everything he had spent so long trying to hide was shattered with her mere proximity. There was only one woman who could ever reduce him to a pathetic stuttering monstrosity.

"Jiro!" she exclaimed with faked surprise. By the tone in her voice, she was a little less than enthusiastic about bumping into him a second time. "We've got to stop meeting like this or I might get fired. Shit! I hope I have everything here." She rifled through the folders, glancing over their contents.

Call it fate, destiny, or whatever, there had to be something with the alignment of the stars or something that seemed to keep pulling them together. Soujiro was a bit taken aback by the fact that she didn't run like a scared rabbit. He thought back to a few weeks ago when they had found themselves in the same exact situation. However, this time she had not opted to scramble for all her papers and make a mad dash away from him like the fiery flames of hell were after her.

There was only so long she could spend immersed in the papers, so she slowly raised her head and offered a weak smile. "You've grown up a lot since I last saw you," she lamely stated.

"So have you," he numbly replied. His feet shuffled beneath him as he lost all nerve to look at her in the face.

She spun around slowly in a blatant display of her conservative beige skirt suit and newly highlighted brown sugar hair. After one full circle she placed her hands firmly on her hips, and she winked. "Not too shabby, huh? I've cleaned up rather nicely, I must say."

"You have,' he agreed. "So, what are you doing here?" He winced a bit at the undisguised bluntness to his question.

Her smiled faded, and her lips fell into a thin line, finally seeing that small bit of resentment she should have assumed he would feel. "I'm working full time now for the Minato Insurance Agency. It's rather boring really. I'm just an agent. I was on my way to a new site that is being looked at as a prospective client. I mainly specialize in building properties."

He offered a weak smile. "Seems like you've made a life for yourself."

She nodded her head animatedly. "I had to find some way to feed myself. I couldn't live under my parents forever.

"Umm... I think I should be going now. You have work to do. It was nice seeing you," He hurriedly said his goodbyes, and began to walk briskly away, but was pulled back by a hand grabbing his wrist.

"Wait, Jiro!" Sara nervously chewed on her bottom lip, and glanced upwards towards the large clock on the exterior of the bank. "Listen, I don't need to be at my next appointment until 11. Would you like to have a cup of coffee or something? I would really like to catch up a bit with you."

He stared at the small hand on his arm to the woman looking up at him with pleading eyes. Something in him couldn't resist. Just like he couldn't resist her all those years ago, he still couldn't resist her today. "Fine."

"How about over there?" She gestured to the tiny outdoor café across the street and took his arm, dragging him across the street without waiting for an answer.

Soujiro followed her in morbid silence, regretting his weakness for the woman beside him, but that was dispelled when he saw her flash her lively smile at the waiter who directed them to a table. When she sat down, she settled her hands defensively on her lap, waiting for him to strike. By the grimace on his face, she knew right away he was in one of his fouler moods.

If she was to be brought down by the deadly glares emitting from him, she would go down in a blaze of horrific glory.

"You know I went back to look for you, but by then you were long gone."

He tilted his head to the side, giving a sideways glance to the empty street across from him. "There was nothing much to go back to."

"I heard about your mother," she barely whispered, as if speaking some forbidden secret. She recounted in her head how about a year or two ago when she had finally had the independence to go back to her childhood haunts to look for the certain boy that still plagued her at odd times in the night. "I'm sorry to hear she passed away."

A nerve was struck in him, and all those repressed feelings that he had tried to ignore for so long were slowly resurfacing. He stared in odd fascination at her, wondering if she knew what sort of memories she was eliciting from him. It was a cruel punishment from his angel of mercy.

"It's been a few years. I've gotten over it by now. Sometimes I really believe she's better off dead than alive."

She winced at the harshness in his choice of words. Her fingers tapped against the side of her water glass as small drops of condensation collected on her fingertips. Out of an old bad habit, her left leg, which was crossed over the right one, was bouncing up and down impatiently. "Perhaps she is, but you must miss her."

"Can we stop talking about her?" he growled lowly. "It would be just like you to bring up shit like this now."

She sighed wistfully, and flicked the few drops of water off her hand onto the hot asphalt beneath them. The small action caused the cool liquid to hiss as it hit the ground with a small douse of smoke rising from the spots. "Fine. We'll talk about other things, then. What have you been up to the last time I saw you?

"Oh, the usual." He impassively waved his hand. "My life is just like every boy next door's story. Boy falls in love with childhood friend. The kids do it. Girl's parents find out and take her away. Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that boy's life is so fucked up, his dad would beat his mother every night since he was a kid until one day he cracked and he hit her a little too hard. Either it would be hitting his bitch or taking up the bottle. Boy's mother dies from a skull fracture and internal brain hemorrhaging when her head hits the wall a bit too hard." His fingers pinched together to emphasize the word 'bit.' "Boy's father gets thirty to life. Boy runs away. Everything after that is a bit hazy, but you get the gist. Sex, drugs, and sorry, no rock and roll."

"I'm sorry, I didn't know." Sara clamped a hand over her mouth, muffling the gasp of air that escaped her lips. "I really didn't know."

"Yeah, well I was surprised you didn't do your research before you spoke too soon. Most of our old neighbors still live there. It was the talk of the community for a few months after everything. Everyone loves a scandal in the now not so peaceful middle class suburbia they idealized for so long. That about sums it up, so if you'll excuse me, I have to be going." He pushed his metal chair backwards with a loud scraping noise as it raked across the hard pavement.

"Wait!"

He stopped, but kept his back to her, afraid to show her how much his cool exterior had worn off in his tirade. "What do you want know?"

"I don't remember you being this disagreeable, Jiro."

That thin thread of sanity in him cracked as his head whipped towards her. "Don't call me that. I don't even understand why you want to have this little tête-à-tête. Clearly we have nothing to talk about, considering our less than amicable break up. I don't even know why I agreed to have coffee with you." He viciously tugged his hand through his hair, trying to make some sense out of the situation. It all went into an endless loop with the same conclusion that he was probably cursed with some masochistic tendencies.

She stood up stiffly from her seat, and gathered her things. "We've both made a lot of mistakes. Can't we just forgive and forget? It's clearly obvious we aren't the same fifteen year olds we used to be. Why can't we at least be friends as adults?" All of the muscles in her jaw clenched as she yelled.

It was a simple idea really. It didn't take a genius to see how foolish the entire concept was, a clean slate. However, that was exactly what Soujiro wasn't looking for. For all his life, he had made only one assertion on life itself. The past could and never would be forgotten. It is exactly what embodies all that we are. Losing that would be like losing a part of our souls, our very existence. You could hide from it, or ignore it, but in the end, it will follow you until the day you cease to exist.

"I don't think we can do that."

"Why not?" Slowly, she dragged the back of her hand against his cheek. She smiled a bit wider when the noticeable shiver in his body gave way to what he was feeling. She had felt it herself when she had seen him for the first time. "Why can't we just look at it like a long break we took? I don't know about you, but I could never forget my first, my Jiro."

"I don't want to forget what happened between us," he icily stated. "I don't owe you anything."

He wasn't exactly lying when he said those words. He really meant them for what they were worth. If she knew exactly which aspects of their past he wished to never forget, the deep scowl on her face would have been different.

"You never showed up that night. I asked you to come see me that night before I left, but you never came. I waited all night for you, but you never showed up. Didn't you think it hurt that you never even came to say goodbye? Where were you that night?"

"I don't want to talk about it. I wanted to be there, but things were out of my control. By the time I got there you were gone."

And you took my heart with you.

She released him from her grasp and stood firmly on the ground when she asked him the next question. "Did you see the message I left you?"

All too painfully well.

"I didn't," he lied.

She knew it, too.

"Then, I'll tell you right now. Love Jiro."

He winced at the memory of the familiar words scrawled upon the billboard high above the city, professing a childhood love that dreams are made of. They could have been that perfect couple, the ones began as childhood friends blossoming into a lifelong love that could compare only to the greatest of the epic romances.

It was all too painfully clear to remember those jumbled pubescent emotions at once. He lived and breathed for her. She was his light in all the horrific darkness around him. No matter how many times his father struck him down, no matter how many times he broke down in fear and anguish over his inability to protect his mother, she gave him reason to exist in this world because there was someone who gave a damn whether he lived or died. His mother was too far gone in her own quiet depression to properly love and care for him as she should have, but she was different. Sara gave him reason to want to live.

But she had been taken away all too easily.

Can you take back what has been lost?

"I never got your reply," she stated more as a question than a statement. It was apparent that the dredging of what had been was beginning to take its toll on her as well. Her voice began to crack, and small, tiny, iridescent tears flowed down her flushed cheeks. "I've never forgotten you. Have you so easily forgotten me?"

Words would not present themselves to him, which frustrated him to no extent. The idea of taking actions was resisted due to the knowledge that he might not be able to accept their consequences. All he could do was stand there, and stare blankly at her, letting the pregnant pause consume them.

He made one step forward, and a hand reached out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Slowly, he leaned further and further to her face, stopping mere inches away. His warm breath tickled against her lips, and her chest heaved a heavy intake of air. Out of habit, she placed her own hands on his chest, waiting for him to make the first move as he had done one rainy afternoon so many years ago, in a time that seemed to have never existed.

"Never," he whispered delicately into her ear. He bent down a bit lower, realizing the difference in their heights was still there, but now he did not need to bend so low as before. The gap was closed as his lips sought out hers, tasting her for the first time as a woman.

It felt like nothing else in the world. Nothing would ever compare to her, to her kisses. There was that familiar temerity he recalled so much, the way her mouth slowly parted, letting him suckle teasingly on her bottom lip. When he managed to coax her mouth open, his thirst for her seemed unquenchable. So they stayed like that, ignoring the wide- eyed stares of passersby and the polite cough by the waiter trying to get their attention.

He knew he shouldn't have done it, let her back into his life so easily, but what could he do?

You never forget your first.

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Tsukushi and Akira stared down at the ledgers in front of them, both staring intently at the blur of numbers therein. Junpei lazily lounged on the couch, waiting for their reply, although it was taking a bit longer than he expected.

"Wow! They are really willing to pay a lot for a party hosted by us," Tsukushi spoke up. She whistled as she picked up the budget proposal.

Junpei lifted his head and nodded. "Well, these guys aren't paying chickenshit for a half assed party. They want the best, and you know we still hold the best reputation for parties. It makes us even more desired that we do it so rarely. People like to brag about the fact that they managed to get Last Resort to do one of their functions."

"Yeah, we do have a rep to uphold," Akira agreed. He punched a few more buttons on the calculator, tallying up the total cost of the proposed event for evaluation towards their decision. "When was the last time we threw a party of this scale?"

"I think about a year ago," Tsukushi answered. She tugged on the hair band wrapped around her wrist and pulled her hair back, twisting it into a ponytail. "I'm not so sure about this, though. We did make a ton of money off that private birthday party, but the stress level of pulling something off like that almost killed us. We only did it because we needed to pay for the new sound equipment, and to cover the damages done to the place over the years. We don't necessarily need to do it, and I'm personally not that desperate for cash to do this. What do you think, Akira?'

"I don't know. It is really short notice to be doing this. The party is less than a month away. We could pull it off in a week or two, so that leaves us a two-week leeway to make a decision. We may not need the cash, but it might be good for some extra savings for future expenses we might incur. Plus, I know for a fact that the others would like a little bit of a bonus."

Junpei hopped up from the couch, and sauntered towards the desk shared by Akira and Tsukushi. He sat down on the corner of the old wooden desk, admiring the numbers on the papers. "These guys are willing to pay anything to pull this off. I also got a few more offers from some other friends."

"Where do you find these people anyway? I thought after the fiasco that happened a few years back, most of the inner circle wouldn't speak to you." Tsukushi looked up at him questioningly, wondering of the deal which sounded a bit too good to be true.

"It was a long time ago. In the modeling world, all models are born with an expiration date. Most of the better ones last only a few years at most. I just got unlucky that my reputation got dragged through the dirt all 'cause of some bad press. No one wants to hire someone to represent their products with a criminal record."

"You were really good at what you did, though. You could have kept doing it for a few more years if you didn't get into all those random fights. You really need to work on those rage issues."

"Eh," he shrugged. "The whole pretty face thing got old fast. My agency wouldn't even hire me back after I messed up a few of their clients when we got shit faced during one of the after parties. I was never really happy with that life, letting people visually rape me all the time. I like what I do now. I don't know what I would have done if Susumu hadn't offered me this gig. I like getting paid to rough up people."

"Geez, you make it sound like you work for the mob or something."

"Yeah, well I kept in touch with some of the guys I met along the way. Some of them made it out better than others, I suppose. Your brother knew Hiro, too. We all rolled with the same crowd back in the old days. I still can't believe the poor bastard is getting married. Well, I guess if you're gonna sell your soul, you might as well go out with a bang. That is one wild bachelor's party there."

Tsukushi lifted the list of requirements to her face. "There are a whole lot of strippers requested here." She raised a speculative eyebrow. "He does realize that we don't condone sex in the club and that all the girls we bring in aren't prostitutes, right?"

"Uh huh, I told him straight out we don't do that kind of thing. The party plans weren't even penned out by Hiro. It was his best man that wrote up that list. I've seen Hiro. He's too pussy-whipped to dare plan something this crazy. His groomsmen are behind it all. When they heard that he had connections here, they jumped at the chance for the best."

"I'm starting to wonder why we always get stuck with parties for men. For once, I would like to see the place filled with some male strippers."

"Uh, there are a few on the list too," Junpei pointed out.

Akira blanched, but the point was proven to be true when he took a second look at it.

"A few of their buddies swing the other way. We can't be discriminatory on preferences."

"I see. Tell them we'll get back to them after we think about it some more."

"Okay. I should get going. I've got some guys to see about some temp work here."

Tsukushi pushed herself away from the desk, letting her chair roll backwards a few feet. Her feet dropped onto the top of the desk with a dull thud that sent a few papers flying to the ground. She eyed them as they drifted in the air, but cared not to pick them up at the moment.

Akira stretched his arms out and rubbed his eyes, trying to readjust them from all the reading they had done in the last few hours. They did manage to tackle most of the bills, contracts, and accounting books for the past month, but the tedious tasks still were a challenge.

"Penny for your thoughts?" he asked, rubbing his temples.

Tsukushi rolled her head backwards and closed her eyes. Her arms raised above her head, lifting her tank top a few inches above her stomach, revealing a small expanse of skin. One hand shot over her mouth when a loud yawn emitted from her. "I don't know. In some ways, I want to do it because it'll be good for business. With the work, we could probably afford to shut the club down for a week or two to let everyone off on a vacation. We all need one of those. I don't remember the last time we did that. I'm just not sure if I'm willing to go through hell to get it. Did you see those plans?"

"Yeah, it's some pretty wild shit, but it is doable."

She opened one eye, and glanced in his direction. "It would require us to open up the private rooms. Fuck, I don't remember when was the last time we used those rooms. It's been so much easier to monitor our customers when they're forced to be out in the open. I don't want people doing drugs or having sex up there. I still remember how horrifying it was to go up there with a black light to check out the damage to the couches. Shit was everywhere."

"Well, people lose all inhibitions with the right lighting, their bellies full of booze, and clouded judgment. So, are we going to think this over for a bit?"

"Yeah."

Tsukushi rose from her seat, and walked towards the door, opening it to hear the sounds of people outside working. "We should get out there and help out a bit before opening."

Akira passed on the idea, and decided to occupy her empty leather chair. "You go on ahead without me. I, uh, have a few more things to look over here."

"That means you don't want to make your lazy ass do some real work," she grinned.

"You know me all too well," he laughed, breaking out into a full smile. "I'll be out in a minute." His hands ruffled through his hair, pulling back the bangs that had fallen over his face.

---------------------------------

"How many more glasses do we have to wash?" Tsukasa whined for about the twentieth time in the last two hours. His hands were becoming chapped from dunking them in and out of the hot water. Glasses of all sizes bobbed up and down in the soapy water in front of him.

Sakurako blew at a strand of hair that fell over her eyes. "Oh, about another three hundred. I'm starting to wish that we didn't put off cleaning up last time."

"Now why can't someone else do this?"

She loaded up another tray of glasses into the dishwasher and jammed her index finger into the start button. The soft hum of water swishing around the insides of the machine interrupted their conversation. "Trust me. You'll thank me later that I got you out of cleaning the bathrooms." She shuddered at the thought alone. "It was scrubbing toilets or scrubbing glasses.

He pondered over the two choices and had to agree with her that they had lucked out on the coin toss. Tsuyoshi and Kin hadn't been as lucky. Tsukasa jumped slightly when he heard a godawful scream that sounded a lot like Kin coming from somewhere.

Sakurako laughed to herself. "I think Kin just got into the women's bathroom."

"I always thought the men's room was ten times dirtier than the women's. I heard you guys have a couch, mirrors, and all that frilly shit."

She lifted an eyebrow at his assumption. "It's a whole different story when you get into the stall, buddy."

"What the fuck is this?!" another voice boomed from the distance.

"And that would be Tsuyoshi joining Kin," she giggled. Once again the annoying strand of hair fell over her eyes as she bent over to unload a clean tray of glasses to be transported to the bar.

Tsukasa noticed her bothersome hair, and reached forward to tuck it behind her ear for her. His touch was light and gentle as the annoying locks were brushed aside. "There, that's better."

"Thanks." Quickly she averted her gaze from him. A light fluttering formed in the pit of her stomach at his feathery touch.

What's wrong with me lately? This is me, the girl who's probably had more men in the last few years than most people have in a lifetime, reduced to these pathetic flutterings. I haven't felt like this since... well, I haven't ever really felt like this. Maybe there was that one time, but that was ages ago, in another time and place.

She snuck a glance at Tsukasa, studying him as he worked over the sink. It was a rather silly sight to see him donning an apron and yellow rubber gloves. It wasn't exactly the sexiest thing to be wearing at the moment. However, her hungry eyes just couldn't get enough of the slight ripple of his biceps as his hands moved beneath the sudsy water. With each slight movement the muscles tensed and released, exposed by the thin covering of a red wife beater shirt. Every time he reached his arm up to wipe away the forming of small rivulets of sweat slipping down his face, his shirt would lift just enough to teasingly allow a peek at the inkling of a toned six pack hidden beneath his attire. The way his baggy pants slightly hung low on his hips, and the slight slip of them displaying the faint trail of hair that started near his navel traveling down to his lower regions. She didn't need much imagination to know what he looked like topless, considering she got an eyeful yesterday at the pool. It was enough to make her mouth go dry.

Tsukasa was a fine piece of the male species. That she could not deny.

However, there were the seemingly innocent rules of Last Resort that hindered her desire to take him on the floor right then and there. It was one of those unspoken rules out of many that everyone firmly believed in to some extent, the rules of attraction. No one ever forbid the concept of developing romantic relations outside of the club, nor was it very often that it occurred. Within their tight knit group, the geometric ties of love were mind-boggling, but outside of that there was that fine line of business and outside life. None of the girls ever dated any of the bodyguards or male bartenders that drifted in and out of the place every few months when business got too busy. It was the same with the guys concerning the female temporary help.

Tsukasa was different though. He managed to assimilate himself so easily into the clique.

"Hey, Sakurako?"

"Huh?" she so eloquently replied when she heard her name being called.

"Are you okay? You've been drying that same glass for the last five minutes."

She stared down at her hand, and her eyes widened, realizing that he was right. "Oh, sorry. I spaced out there for a minute."

The look of concern etched on his face dimmed a bit. "Did anyone tell you, you look nice today?" he added. The comment was made on his part with the calculated motive of drawing her out of her slight bout of melancholy by attacking her weak point, her vanity.

Sakurako stared down at her baggy pair of tan cargo flood pants, a black tank top that had seen better days, and grungy, old pair of sneakers. To her, she resembled one of those sixteen-year old teeny boppers trying to look like a skater punk. She saw right through his lie. "I find that hard to believe."

He vehemently shook his head, disagreeing with her. "You look much better like this than when you're trying to be that other person. It's much more easy to be around you like this. I don't mean to offend you or anything, but I think guys find a woman much more attractive when she's herself."

A frown formed on her face. His words struck a chord in her. It was rare that someone who knew her for such a short time could be perceptive enough to see right through her. The only ones who ever did were Akira and Tsukushi. From day one, they saw right through the façade she carried with a defined skill and execution. Susumu had been the first to make that fact known pointblank in her face when they first met. They all saw beneath the layers of makeup, the scandalous clothing, and the air she carried, simply stating one word, sex.

A bit of her ego fell with her secret let out.

Tsukasa spoke up once again, feeling a bit stupid for blurting that out, not really knowing whether or not she was insulted by his assessments. "I overheard Tsukushi talking about you and Yuuki's new makeovers. It's kind of funny of how you two were on polar opposites. Yuuki was too kiddy for her own good, and you were.... Uh...."

"Slutty?"

He was quick to defend himself. "I didn't mean that. I think liberal with clothing is a better way to describe it. You two just need to stay somewhere in the middle. Well, at least that's what my sister told me about girls, from what I remember," he shyly concluded.

She rethought her choice of the attire, agreeing with him. Comfort was something she generally pushed aside for that shocking factor in her form of dress. A sly thought crossed her mind. "So what kind of girl do you like?"

The question threw him a bit off-balance when the conversation was turned around on him. He stopped his work for a moment to ponder over it. In reality he had never really thought much about what exactly was his ideal woman. Most of them had always had some large glaring flaw that bothered him to no ends. "I guess, a girl who knows who she is and doesn't hide it."

The vague answer didn't do much for her, but she chose not to pry any further. There were too many jumbled thoughts in her head at the moment.

All of the lies and games were becoming tiresome anyway. Maybe the girls were right that I should take a different approach. It may sound stupid, but I've never been with a man who knew the real me, at least not after him. He broke my heart, took my innocence away, and left me empty. I couldn't bear that feeling again. It's going to sound silly, but am I developing a crush on Tsukasa?

The mere utterance of his name in her mind made her face flush.

A cold dash of water hit her in the chest, followed by a deep, full laughter.

"What the?!"

"If you keep spacing out like that I don't think we'll finish before next year," Tsukasa laughed. The sprayer attached to the faucet was gripped in his hand as another peal of laughter erupted from him at her shocked face. That look was enough to make his day.

"Oh, don't think you'll get away with that!" she shrieked.

He motioned her forward with his hand. "Bring it on, little girl."

"It's on now," she replied in a deadly whisper. Her hand reached for the bucket of water on the counter, and she threateningly swished the full container with a gleam of certain death in her eye.

"You wouldn't do it."

"Yes, I would. Prepare to meet your maker!"

The entire contents of the container were thrust at him, and a huge splash of water hit him in the face at full force. Thus, began an all-out water war between the two. Armed with the spray nozzle from the faucet, and she with the sink full of water, they splashed and sprayed themselves silly until they were soaked and covered in soapy water. Their screams of battle could be heard all throughout the club as it waged on.

"You're not being fair! You have the hose, and all I've got is buckets of water. We need to even out things."

"No way!"

They both stood at a standstill, waiting for the other to make the first move, which would probably be the deciding factor to declare a victor. Although by the way they looked, it seemed no one could claim the title.

"Put yours down."

"No, you put yours down."

"Okay, we'll do it on the count of three."

"One. Two. Th..."

"Ah!"

Sakurako lunged forward with her last bucket of water. Unfortunately the ground was slippery beyond belief, with water pooling at their feet. She didn't stand a chance as the rubber soles of her sneakers met the wet ground. Her body flew at him, knocking him completely off balance and onto the ground. She soon found herself thrown on top of him in a mangled mess of limbs. Both burst out in uncontrollable laughter that wracked through their bodies. Neither even noticed the close proximity their faces were to each other until, their laughing subsided. Sakurako looked down at him with droplets of water dripping off her face and hair onto him. Their noses practically touched.

"Can you get off?" Tsukasa breathily asked.

"Sure," she shakily replied. She rolled off of him after a few clumsy attempts. Her entire body seemed to be unable to respond to the commands she gave it. A hot stain of pink colored her cheeks, and that fluttering in her stomach was turning into twisting knots. She pushed herself off the ground, but made sure to keep her face away from his. "I'll go get a mop to clean up this mess. You finish up with the glasses. I'll be back." She hurriedly excused herself and ran out the door.

She was scared out of her wits. Everything just seemed a bit too much all at once. One minute she saw Tsukasa and the next thing she knew he was this entirely different person to her. It was just an infatuation that showed no signs of fruition, but now her body was telling her it was much more.

I think it's too late now.

--------------------------------

"I haven't had that much fun in a long time!" Yuuki squealed in joy as she sat in the passenger seat of Thomas' car. Her heart was still pounding in her chest after that last ride on the rollercoaster.

It was a strange turn of events when Thomas decided to break their somber lovesick mood of the morning with a romp through the amusement park. She had no choice in the matter when he took her hand and dragged her from ride to ride, forcing her into submission by his cruel means. With that little boy pout of his, she was a goner. Somewhere in all the madness, Thomas has managed to do what was needed for their plan to work. By getting Yuuki to relax, he was able to spend some quality time with her and have them learn a bit more about each other. In between stuffing their faces with cotton candy and other fat-filled and sugarcoated delicacies and stomach turning rides, small snippets of conversation were captured.

"Really? I usually try to make a few trips here now and then when I have free time from work. I think you're the first girl to make it all the way through the park without bailing on me," he laughed. He kept one hand on the steering wheel while another patted her on the knee. "It seems I may have finally found my partner in crime."

"Don't start thinking we'll do this every week," Yuuki gently reprimanded him. Her lips quivered into the smile she was holding back. "Next date, I get to choose where we go."

"Ah, so there will be a next date." He turned his head for a moment, casting her a quick wink. "You always seem so tense all the time. You should relax a bit more often. You know, loosen up a little."

It was embarrassing to admit it, but Thomas was right. Yuuki thought over the last time she had just kicked back, and not given a damn. All her actions, thoughts, and words were always carefully, methodically thought out with certainty that they would be appropriate. The realization finally dawned on her of the purpose of their impromptu trip to the theme park. With Soujiro and all the other men she had been with, there was always that small unease in herself that she couldn't let go, wanting to be everything they wanted of her.

"And loosening up consists of heckling those guys dressed up as theme park mascots?" she giggled.

"Hey, that dude in the costume kept staring down your shirt while I was taking the picture. He deserved a little kick in the ass for that," he grimaced.

"Was it worth it getting us kicked out?"

"Hell yeah."

"You're such a kid. This might be a bad example for your students."

"There's nothing wrong with that. I don't know what they would do if they saw their English teacher cramming a corn dog in his face while kicking some guy's ass in the panda costume. Oh, the horror of it all!"

"Thomas McKay you're a bad influence."

"Thank you very much for the compliment." He let out a content sigh as his foot slackened on the gas pedal, letting the car coast down the clear highway. His eyes drifted out into the far horizon to the velvety canvas splattered in blotches of orange, red, and yellow hues. Tufts of cottony soft clouds drifted by, capping off the tip of the endless sea of sky. The wonder of nature before him set the mood for the small silence that took over.

Yuuki snuck a peek at her companion in the car, and let out a light sigh of contentment. She normally would have felt awkward in the midst of a pause in conversation, but for once she didn't feel the need to fill in the silence. A small pang of guilt hit her at the thought that she had never really known Thomas that well, considering the number of years they had seen each other as co-workers. Perhaps it was due to her own attachment to Soujiro and her peers around her own age. There was always that defined line between Tsukushi's group and Susumu's crew. With their age differences, the two had always remained divided, but with Susumu's passing they were forced to meld into one working unit. She saw no need to speak to or see Thomas outside work at the club, so there had been little interaction needed between the two. In essence, they had been practically strangers.

"So what are you thinking about?" she asked.

A small smile graced his lips. "I was just thinking about how much this sunset reminds me of the days I used to spend with friends at the lake after a long day of swimming. There was a way the light would hit the top of the trees, peeking between the leaves so that the water would glimmer with small sparkles. My parents always used to laugh at me when I said that there was treasure on the bottom of the lake as a kid." He took a slow long breath, concentrating on his driving. "Tokyo, Japan isn't much different from Ashland, Virginia. Both feel like home."

She gently placed her smaller hand over his on her thigh and squeezed. "Do you ever think about going back to see your family?"

"Sometimes, I guess. After my dad retired from the Navy, he finally planted roots in my grandparents' old house. When grandpa died, he left the place to them anyway. My sister, Caroline and her husband moved to Richmond, being the big shot lawyer he is. My younger brother, Jacob, is just starting his second tour of the Middle East. Why he chose to follow our dad's footsteps is beyond me, but I guess one of us had to carry on the family tradition. Like the saying goes, 'Semper fidelis'."

Yuuki's grip on his hand slacked as she listened to him speak so fondly of his own family. Family was never really something she knew much of, considering she had been brought up alone by her widowed father. It was always the two of them, and their relationship had been nothing close to resembling the conventional bond between father and daughter.

Family? To this day I still don't understand what family really means. It was always daddy and I. We were never very close to begin with. I guess, I'm a bit jealous of Thomas and his family. I wonder if things would have been much different if my mother had lived, but there's no use thinking about such wishful things.

"Well, he must be proud of you no matter what. You are his son."

He shrugged his shoulders, not really sure what to say in response. "He shows it in his own little ways. If it weren't for him and a few of his connections in the government, I wouldn't have been able stay in this country. He pulled a few strings to get me that working visa through the foreign exchange program. I'm a little glad that my dad dragged us around the world with his job. I've seen places some people have only dared dream about. Japan was always my favorite country we lived in. When I was eight and we moved here, it was a complete culture shock, but the four years we lived here changed my life. My dad always knew I missed Japan the most when we moved back to the States."

"I would like to one day see the world," she wistfully sighed.

"I could see you as a Paris type of girl. Although, I must say the French are highly overrated."

"A little biased, aren't we? Did a little French girl break your heart or something?" she teased.

"Yep, and with that she took my virginity," he countered. "It was first love. What can I say?"

"Today was fun," Yuuki piped in, going completely off topic. She blushed when he bit back the laugh at her sudden outburst. However, she had managed to turn the conversation away from the distressing subject of love.

He caught her not so subtle way of changing topics, and decided to let it slide. "You've already said that, but I agree with you. It kind of reminded me of the days when Susumu and I would blow off a day by goofing off like this. He was a true master of rides. No matter what Susumu did, he was always the best at everything."

"I know. Remember the time Junpei dared him to go skydiving with him? Junpei got freaked when they hit the sky and Susumu decided to jump, but not before he pushed him out first."

Thomas' loud, deep laughter filled the car. "I remember that. For weeks, Junpei kept insisting he saw the light. But do you want to hear a little secret?"

"What?!" she asked in great interest. She leaned in closer to him, enraptured by his words.

"That wasn't the first time Susumu jumped out of a plane."

"You're kidding!"

"Nope. Scout's honor," he asserted, raising his hand. "Junpei must have forgotten that Susumu went to a military academy his last year of high school. They had those guys jumping out of planes, running through obstacle courses, and firing machine guns off in their sleep. For Susumu, the task was a cakewalk. He did it just to see Junpei get scared shitless. Those two were always coming up with dares just to see who would be the first to crack under the pressure."

"It sounds like something he would do. He was always trying to find ways to make us face our fears. When I was too scared to wait tables my first time, he shoved me into the largest, loudest table and suggested we play drinking games. He got so into the games with us I forgot I was working. He always knew how to make you feel better."

"Yeah, he did." His voice quavered a bit at the words. "It's just never been the same without him, but I couldn't find the strength to leave her after he died. My dad suggested I stay here and look out after Tsukushi. After all, Susumu was like a brother to me. My family practically adopted him when he lived with us. Dad loved him like a son. It was actually Susumu who talked him into letting me live my own life when I dropped out of college after my first year. After his riveting argument for my benefit, dad got suckered in by Susumu's charm. He always said, 'Susumu was a man who would do great things no matter how small they seemed.'"

"You miss him much."

"I do, but things happen in life, ya know? We can keep thinking about the past and dwell on what could have, should have, and would have been, but in the end, we are where we are for a reason."

"So, don't you think maybe Sakurako and you aren't together for a reason?"

"Maybe, but I'm not willing to give up on her just yet. Look, we're here," he pointed out as he parked in the back of the club. "Ready to put on a show?"

She vigorously nodded her head, and stepped out of the car. Thomas pulled out the giant Pikachu doll he had won for Yuuki from his back seat and hoisted it over his shoulder.

"Are you sure you don't want to keep this thing? I did win it for you after all," Thomas poked his finger into the fluffy marshmallow mass of a doll.

"Umm... That's okay. I don't think I have room for him at my place. Plus, I know Kaya will love him. We'll just shove him into the office for now so Tsukushi can bring him home to her later.

"I wish I was spoiled rotten like her as a kid," he pouted.

"Well, perhaps if you didn't do things like skateboard off the roof of the house, your parents would have spoiled you a bit more."

"Hey, that was an experiment of gravity and science."

"Uh huh, I bet that's what you told the doctor that had to put your leg in a cast."

"Remind me to share less with you."

"Aww! But I love hearing stories about your childhood. It'll be useful for future blackmail."

"Definitely should have ended the conversation earlier," he sighed.

Her laughter filtered into the large room as they entered the club. They waved and said their polite hellos to the crew already setting up for the night, and they were welcomed by another laughing couple. Tsukasa and Sakurako, soaking wet and laughing their heads off, burst out from the kitchen. Sakurako skidded across the ground and grabbed Thomas, using him as a human shield and in effect knocking Yuuki away from his side.

"Thomas! Save me!" Sakurako shrieked as she ducked behind his back.

"Whoa! What the hell is going on?" Thomas yelled. A large wet stain grew on the front of his shirt where Sakurako had grabbed. He tenderly pulled the small girl from behind him, and pushed her in front of him. The large Pikachu doll on his shoulder had fallen to the ground, which Yuuki picked up to drag away.

All of a sudden Yuuki didn't feel like she really belonged there. As usual, Sakurako had so easily captured Thomas' interest, and he no longer felt a need to be with her. As the russet haired, sopping wet girl waved her arms enthusiastically around, retelling her harrowing ordeal of being water attacked, Thomas' attention seemed to be completely engaged at the moment. Sighing, she picked up the doll and decided to drag it to the office for safekeeping.

"Yuuki?"

"Hmm..." she replied, not paying much attention to the person speaking to her.

Tsukushi frowned at the sight of what had happened. It was really none of her business, and she had learned long ago that in their small world Sakurako had a way of stealing the spotlight. Yuuki had been more of the fan cheering on the sidelines. The entire time she had been standing in the hallway, quietly observing the show going on. From what she had seen, Thomas and Yuuki had joined in their unholy alliance. However, she also saw what had happened in the kitchen. There seemed to be a small snag in the plan.

"Are you okay, Yuuki?"

She put on a brave, forced smile, and nodded her head. "Of course. I was just thinking how horrible it would be if this got wet when we brought it back for Kaya."

Tsukushi looked down at the enormous doll and groaned inwardly as she thought of the lack of space in Kaya's bedroom already. It was a nice thought, but there was an utter lack of practicality in the choice of size. "That was nice of you two. Did you and Thomas go somewhere?"

"Uh huh. We went out to the amusement park."

"Oh geez, he must have dragged you everywhere. I've been with him before, and he's merciless."

"I know what you mean," she laughed. "I think if I passed out during the afternoon, he would have still dragged my lifeless body onto every ride."

"Tsukasa! You can go dry off and get another change of clothes in the dressing room. I think we have a few spare clothes back there," Tsukushi laughed as she watched him wring out his shirt.

"Thanks," he waved and walked away to do just that.

Turning her attention back to Yuuki, she smiled softly while keeping her eyes on Thomas and Sakurako. Keeping her voice just low enough for Yuuki to hear, she flatly said, "I know what you and Thomas are up to."

"What?!" Yuuki gasped. "I knew it was a stupid idea," she groaned. "I think I'm starting to have second thoughts about this now."

A light laugh escaped her lips. Tsukushi rested her hand on Yuuki's back. "I didn't say it was a stupid plan. I was just saying that I know what you're doing. I never said I would tell anyone else." She glanced over at Sakurako, who had managed to get everyone else engaged in her contagious good mood. "Sakurako's always had that ability to draw men to her, you know," she stated matter-of-factly.

"I know. She's always been able to keep her men on short leashes."

"Thomas has the same charisma, too. When you're with him he makes it feel like you're all that matters. You can't help but feel a little let down that his attention strays to other people and they feel the same things you do. It's that feeling of being all that matters. It's too bad that two people that have the exact same effect on other people can't get it right."

"Is this going anywhere?"

"I do have a point. Maybe that's what you need to learn about Jiro. You can't always make him the center of your world, and you can't rely on Thomas to make you that. Don't let this be about a plan to capture their hearts. I think you two might learn more about each other than you think. What I'm trying to say is, if things don't work out as planned, don't let this chance slide. Thomas is a good guy. Sakurako is dense. I love that girl, but she's too thick-headed for her own good. You two may not be the love of your lives, and I'm not saying to settle. Perhaps, Jiro is who you are meant to spend the rest of your life with, but now just isn't the time for him to realize that. Maybe it's time for you to learn what it's like to love someone in a different way. Love someone as your equal."

"I'm not going to fall in love with him."

"Maybe not, but I can see you are jealous right now. What I don't understand is why?"

Yuuki sighed dejectedly, and rubbed the soft top of the Pikachu's head. "I can't be like her." She pointed towards Sakurako. "I've always wanted to be her. I want to be the one to say when, where, how, and why. Men listen to her. They go looking for her."

"And she rejects every single one of them. Do you think she's really happy? It's an act to shield herself from people really knowing her and she knowing them. You have a good heart, and that is what men want. In the long run, the cheap thrill will end the day after. Trust, friendship, and faith are what really matter. Thomas sees that in you, Jiro sees it in you, and we all see that in you. No one is better than the other. You just need to learn to see yourself for who you are and like who you see."

"Thank you," she whispered.

What Tsukushi said really did have an effect on her. She looked on as Akira joined the loud group, and Thomas pulled himself away to smile at her. He smiled back and waved her over. Placing the oversized doll on a chair, she ran over to him, letting him wrap an arm around her waist. The two leaned into each other, fitting perfectly with the other in a companionable ease.

"You think they'll ever get it right?" a voice asked from behind her.

Tsukushi turned around and softly smiled at Rui. "Hey, stranger. When did you get here?"

"Just dropped Kaya off with Tama, and decided to head over here early for practice. I don't remember you to be so well versed and passionate about the complexities of love," he teased. "Were we ever that idiotic like them? I think we handled things a bit better."

"Nah. I think about five years or so of spite and guilt looming over our heads was much better than their situation. Denial is a pain in the ass. We had everything out in the open. With what they hold back, I'm surprised one of them hasn't cracked yet."

"It took us a while, but I think we managed to finally get things right."

"I was never angry at you, Rui. Betrayal is a hard pill to swallow. More than anything else, I felt humiliated that I never saw what was in front of me. Shizuka is a whole other story. What she took from me is unforgivable."

"I can't convince you otherwise," he sighed in defeat.

"Sorry, but that won't be happening any time soon." She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back against the wall, joining her somber companion. "For some odd reason, I have this feeling like everything's going to change. I don't know if it'll be good or bad, but I can see a lot of changes coming." Her fingers idly traced the marred wall, outlining the prickly concrete surface. "How are the trip plans coming?"

"Good," he answered with half closed eyes. "We've gotten reservations at the Crown. It was a pretty good deal to rent one of the small beach houses lined up along the beach. We'll have some privacy that way."

"That's nice," she absently replied. "I know Kaya is looking forward to it. We're going to go shopping for some new beach clothes for her this week."

Reference to the Crown resort only brought up the memory of Kazuya. His words still plagued her, even though it had been a few days since their encounter. She let him get under her skin more than she let on, and it was an inner battle to restrain herself from proving him wrong. The fact of the matter was that she didn't know what she wanted. Perhaps it was fear of tasting bitter disappointment, one she knew all too well. In her short lifetime so far, not many had proven her wrong about reliance on others. She could never escape the confines of her role as the leader, the one everyone expected the most from. Being buried under a mountain of responsibility and emotional baggage was her duty, and hers to bear alone.

"You don't have to, you know. I can take care of that."

"No, it's okay. It's my job."

She had long ago accepted her fate, but that didn't mean that she was not going to be a driving force in changing that. Looking at her friends, she smiled to herself.

Everything is going to change. When everything is said and done, they'll be okay to go on without me.

---------------------------------

He strolled lazily through the back door of the club, lost in a haze of his own pensive thoughts. His mood had taken a huge turn from that morning, and an unsettling unease just wouldn't go away. He silently cursed himself for so easily getting caught up in Sara.

Sara. She still has that hold on me. I guess it's natural that I would fall at her feet so easily. With our history, its hard to ignore the obvious. She did achieve the impossible.

She broke my heart.

His head lifted up when he caught the laughter to what must have been the funny part of the story when he walked into the lighted club. Everyone was gathered in the middle of the dance floor, talking about something with bits and chunks of their random conversation drifting towards his ears.

His steps faltered suddenly when he noticed something particularly disturbing. Once again, he was brought back into that confusing dilemma that was Yuuki. His eyes bore into Thomas as he watched her lean so comfortably into him, and giggle lightly at something he had just whispered into her ear.

Whatever that odd feeling he was encountering, he pushed it aside. In a way, he laughed at how it felt like he was in the twilight zone. Tsukushi and Rui were silently leaning against the far corner near the hallway leading towards the main office, and they were smiling and carrying on much like the days when they were in high school. Sakurako was actually dressed very conservatively and in something that could be deemed appropriate for someone her age. For some odd reason, she was soaking wet from head to toe.

It's all so wrong.

"Hey, Jiro! I've been looking for you. I need to talk to you about inventory," Akira yelled as he popped out from nowhere. "I see there's a few missing cases, and I was wondering if you just forgot to log them down before you took them?"

"Huh?"

Okay, Akira doing work. Everything is definitely wrong.

"What the fuck is going on?" he yelled, throwing his arms up in the air. "Someone get me when everyone stops being so damn happy and we go back to being our miserable selves." He spun on his heel and stormed out of the club, leaving a string of curses in his wake.

"What's his deal?" Sakurako obliviously asked.

He stalked outside back into the blazing heat, and resolved to spend the last few hours before opening leaning against the side of the building in the shade. It seemed like nothing was right at the moment. His head hurt, his stomach was churning furiously, and he just couldn't seem to think straight.

His hand reached into his pocket, yanking out a crumpled napkin with a few numbers scrawled in pen. It was a cruel joke to have her come into his life again. That chapter had been closed a long time ago. His hand flexed, balling the napkin in it, and he pulled his arm back to toss it, but stopped. He couldn't let it go. He couldn't let her go.

He groaned once again as his stomach made somersaults. He dwelled a bit on the idea of just going home and making some excuse he was sick, but an overwhelming sense of duty to stay and work through one of their busier days of the week killed the idea. It was times like this that made him crave for a good hard drink. His hands trembled at the thought, and his mouth watered a bit at just the thought of the bitter liquid sliding over his taste buds. The temptation was hard to resist, but resist he did. He wouldn't break his abstinence. One or two was usually hard enough to swallow down, but he knew once he started he wouldn't stop at a time like this. He would just stand there, and let it all pass.

Maybe what he was denying was what he had known all along. Maybe he wasn't over her like he thought he was.

But oh, what he would have given to drown out all of these emotions. The emergence of dead infatuations is enough to kill any man.

--------------------------------

"What's his deal?" Sakurako asked as she watched Soujiro march away after throwing his hissy fit.

"Who knows?" Thomas answered. His grip tightened on Yuuki, and he pulled her closer to himself. He looked down to see the worried expression on her face, but he flashed her a smile in reassurance. "It looks like this might be working," he whispered into her ear.

"Maybe," she numbly replied. Something was gnawing at her, though. It wasn't like Jiro to lose his temper so easily, and she had never expected him to react so openly at them. She noticed the way his glare pierced right through them in their suspicious manner, but something was telling her there was more to his loss of control. While lost in her thoughts, she never even realized that her hand had drifted to Thomas' back, rubbing slow lazy circles.

Sakurako's attention was taken away from whatever it was Kin was telling her about when she looked over to see Thomas and Yuuki. Her attention was caught at the way they seemed to be suddenly cozying up to the other. It wasn't uncommon for the group to be openly touchy, but for the two to be Yuuki and Thomas, it was a bit of a surprise. She thought back to the other day at the pool and the way the two seemed to have bonded over their random act of vengeance and destruction. It wouldn't be uncommon that with the adrenaline rush of getting caught, some sort of romantic inclinations could have evolved in the experience.

However, the pairing alone was enough to leave her flabbergasted.

Who would have thought those two would get together? What happened to Soujiro?

She continued to gawk at the couple, trying to make some sense out of it all, but ended up going in circles in her attempt. Something did not sit right within her to see Yuuki keeping all of Thomas' attention. He had even walked away mid-sentence to attend to Yuuki when she was talking to him. Although she just shrugged it off as nothing, it did bother her to some extent of his rudeness. Being ignored was unfamiliar territory for her, and she didn't like it one bit. More so, the fact that Thomas was the one doing it just egged on the small bit of fury in her.

Her feet were moving without her knowledge and she found herself walking right up to them. "Why are you guys all alone over here?" she asked, barely masking the biting tone in her voice.

Thomas laughed, and kissed Yuuki on the top of her head. "We were just talking about something we saw at the amusement park."

She cocked her head to the side. "You guys went to the amusement park?"

Yuuki nodded her head. "Yeah. It was so much fun."

It wasn't a strange occurrence to know that Thomas spent most of his summers dragging some poor victim to the amusement park with him, forcing them through a day of tortuous stomach-turning rides. She felt a bit left out that she wasn't even asked to go like every other time he went.

"Oh, you did? You should have told me. I would have gone, too. Did you bring me some cotton candy, Thomas? You always do."

An awkward silence ensued as Thomas and Yuuki looked to the other to say something.

Yuuki was the first to speak up. "Well, we sort of decided to go alone, Sakurako."

In response, the red head gave them a perplexed look on her face.

Thomas joined in, not wanting to leave all the explaining to Yuuki. Even though their supposed relationship was entirely false, he never expected the act of telling Sakurako about it to be difficult. For a minute, he really did believe their act to be true.

"Sorry, I forgot. I was a little busy and all. I got a little caught up spending time with Yuuki on our date to remember. Next time, I promise."

"Oh, okay." Her disappointment was evident in her face and voice. "Umm... I should get back to the others. I don't want to miss the end of Kin's story." She walked away with a strange feeling she couldn't put her finger on. When she arrived back to her original group, Tsukasa had finally reappeared.

"Something wrong?" he asked, examining the confusion written all over her face.

"He's never forgotten," she mumbled to herself.

It was just another noisy, drunken night for Last Resort. School had finally let out, leaving thousands of the city's youths free to party to their hearts' content. The clientele was becoming more mixed in a sea of suits, college kids, and the normal clubbers. The combination of horny old men and young college guys with lonely older women and young girls beginning their voyage into sexual exploration was always a bad one. More so, it meant scantily clad girls searching for their summer fling and hot, sexually frustrated men in pursuit of sex, sex, and more sex.

"Get your ass back here, Akira! I'm dying here!" Tsukasa threw his hands up in the air, signaling defeat in his attempts at trying to keep up with the barrage of orders being flung at him.

Akira waved a dismissive hand. "You're doing fine."

"My hands may be full now, but I'm gonna kick your ass for this later."

"Hey Rui! We're drowning back here. Just give us a hand until your next set is up."

"Fine," he curtly agreed. He hopped over the counter and quickly began taking on orders like it was second nature to him.

Rui sullenly poured drinks into glasses, ignoring the leering looks from the women at the bar. With each phone number slipped in with his tip, he would toss the piece of paper into the overflowing trash bin. Unlike the line of people vying for Tsukasa's attention to fill their orders, the crowd in front of Rui calmly waited to place their order. Tsukasa could only feel awestruck at how people always paid Rui some freakish respect. Rui had that effect on a lot of people.

"The next guy that grabs my ass is gonna find my foot up theirs. After tonight my ass is going to be black and blue."

"I know what you mean. If I have to listen to another drunken asshole cleverly compare my name to sounds I would make in bed, I'm going to lose it." Tsukushi slumped down onto the counter, ignoring the rolling list of drinks she had yet to serve. "If it's not the binge drinking that'll kill half the people in this club tonight then it has to be the heat killing all their brain cells."

"Wait! Is that why you chose Mona?" Akira innocently laughed. "You were quite a vixen in bed."

"Dumbass!" Tsukushi screamed, hitting him on the back on his head with her tray. "And why aren't you tending bar?! I don't pay you to sit around watching everyone else do work!"

"To Akira, that is work." Rui placed a glass of water next to Tsukushi's hand, which she gladly gulped down.

"It's like a mad house in here. It's good for business, though."

"I don't think I can take another night like this," Sakurako whined while fanning herself with a napkin. "This heat wave is going to kill us."

"I heard we haven't even reached the peak of this yet."

"Why am I the only one out there?" Yuuki rushed up to the counter, slapping her tray onto it. "The tips are great and all, but it seems like every man and woman out there has grown five hands. I've been felt up in places I didn't think imaginable."

"We just need a breather. Ivy, you get back out there." Tsukushi shoved Sakurako back into the crowd with a full tray of drinks like a sacrificial virgin. "Go get them!" she waved, reading the slew of profanities coming out of her mouth as she walked away. "Isn't it about time for your act, Lolita?" Tsukushi swung herself over the bar and nudged Tsukasa over to try to pick up the slack.

Yuuki glanced down at her watch and gasped. "I better get up there before the natives get any more restless. You coming, Rui?"

Rui nodded his head and hopped over the bar, pushing his way through the crowd back on the stage.

"Be careful up there. This crowd looks a little more rowdy than usual!"

Yuuki waved a dismissive hand and snuck backstage to change. In a matter of minutes she was onstage dressed in a new snug leather outfit slashed in the right places that would most likely be banned as clothing in a few countries. If she moved one step the wrong way the entire thing could have fallen apart. The music slowly began pouring out from the stereo system and over the din of the room, a barely audible rendition of Britney Spear's "Toxic" fought against the clamor in the packed place. Having done the same act so many times, Yuuki danced from one side of the stage to the other, moving her body to the music.

Who knew she could bend that way?

The crowd seemed to quiet down a bit, to Tsukushi's relief. Although there was some nagging feeling that Tsukushi couldn't ignore. She grabbed her walkie-talkie from her hip and clicked onto Junpei's channel.

"What's up?"

"How's it going out there?"

In between crackles in the line, Junpei's strained voice could be heard. "We've reached maximum capacity. I've told the guys to send people away now. How's it look in there?"

"Pretty insane, but I think you should come in here with a few of the guys. I have a bad feeling about tonight."

"Gotcha. I'll be there in a few."

"Thanks."

"No problem, boss."

For the rest of the night, Tsukushi dazzled the patrons with her bartending techniques, earning her a few major tips. With her help, Soujiro was given a little more time to help coach Tsukasa through the night since he had not yet fully adjusted to the mob scene. Yuuki sang her heart out and the crowd had calmed down quite a bit, partying and ogling to her music and body. It was turning out to be just another normal night... or so they thought.

Yuuki was halfway through one of her last songs for the night, feeling like her mind was displaced from her body. It was all about just getting through the last song and knowing that they would be closing up soon. As she was about to cross the stage to the left, she felt a tug at her foot. Trying to ignore it, she pulled back, thinking perhaps her heel had gotten caught on something. To her disgust, she looked down to see a rather drunken young man grabbing at her foot. Thinking she could just slip her foot out from her shoe, she struggled to release herself from the pump. It was better to lose a shoe than anything else at the moment. Her stage smile faltered for a moment, but she was free. Much to her dismay the man decided she wouldn't get away that easily. He climbed onto the stage with the help of a few of his buddies and grabbed her around the waist, grinding his very noticeable arousal against her backside.

Just smile, Yuuki. Someone will drag this loser away any second now. Play it off like it's nothing.

Tsukushi looked up from the middle of pouring a martini to see Yuuki struggling to extricate herself from the inebriated man's unsolicited advances. She pulled out her walkie-talkie. "Junpei! Get on stage now!"

A crack was heard in return. "We're trying to get through now."

Her eyes scanned the room for any sign of help on its way, but somehow Junpei and the others had found themselves trapped on the outside of the growing mass gravitating towards the stage. After one had made his way onto the stage, more followed. It was like a pack of lions feasting on a fresh kill. Chaos ensued with fists being thrown and screams all around. Bodies were colliding into one another. Sneers and jeers from the masses egged on the random acts of violence taking on.

"Somebody get out there and help break it up!"

Akira, Soujiro, and Tsukasa leapt over the bar and started trying to pull people apart in what looked like a futile attempt to soothe the riot breaking out. Sakurako got in a few good punches, knocking out a few angry bitches hovering in her vicinity.

The air quickly escaped the room, suffocating them all in the stench of sweat, alcohol, and pent up frustration. Bodies were everywhere, cramming into the walls, colliding with furniture, and a few unlucky enough to be trampled in the destruction. The lights above still flared in their glaringly bright array of Technicolor glory, sending sprays of iridescent beams in every which way. The faint mixture of screams mixed with sickening sinister laughter echoed in their ears, upping the intensity of the madness.

Yuuki could barely stifle a scream as another hand grabbed at her. The distinct sound of a piece of loose fabric could be heard as it was torn off of her outfit. She helplessly covered her chest, trying to pull her torn shirt closed while defending herself from the lecherous looks the men on stage were giving her. Rui, Kin, Tsuyoshi, and Thomas were doing their best to fight them off, throwing them offstage. It was already too late to save their equipment that had been smashed some time ago when the chaos broke out. Now it was all a matter of trying to get out of there alive and intact.

As another hand made a swipe at her, pulling her into the man's embrace, she screamed an ear piercing howl. She pounded at his chest, trying to fight him off, but he was too powerful to overcome. In annoyance he dragged her behind to the side of the stage, out away from the lights and into the darkness for a bit more privacy. He flung her down on the floor, pinning her arms down with his hands and leaning his entire weight against her stomach, making it a struggle for her to breathe. All she could hear and feel was his hot, heavy breath tickling her skin. His tongue glided against her neck, lowering itself down the valley of her breasts. She wanted to vomit at the feel of his hands riding up her skirt, tugging at her panties. Every part of her body told her to fight, to kick, to scream, but it was all in futility. She tried to kick him off with her legs, but was shocked to find something heavy holding them down.

"I'm going to get my fucking money's worth," he laughed into her ear. The smell of alcohol was still fresh on his breath.

"Get off of her, you bastard!" The man was thrown off of her. Her attacker was rolled off her body, falling into an unconscious heap next to her. She stared wide-eyed at his slack-jawed dead face. Somewhere in the background she could hear the echoes of bones cracking and something hard hitting the walls and floor. Soon it became quiet and only the sound of staggering footsteps approached her.

"Are you okay?" the warm voice questioned. Her savior swept her up from the ground like a piece of fragile glass, scared of breaking her. He held onto her tighter, kicking and shoving his way towards the back changing room, knowing she would be safe in the locked room. Fumbling to get the door open, he ran inside, kicking the door closed behind him. He gently lowered her onto the couch and grabbed for her robe on the chair, laying it over her. He brushed the tears from her face and stroked her back, whispering soothing words into her ear.

Her sobs slowly subsided at the realization that she was completely safe now. She unclenched her hands from the shirt she had soaked through with her tears and looked up. Her eyes shimmered with unwept tears ready to come out, meeting his deep pools of blue. "Thank you, Thomas," she whispered. She pulled up the robe around herself, shivering like a lost child curled up in a ball. The sound of glass smashing made her almost jump out of her position.

"Shit! I better get out there and help them. You stay in here. When I leave, lock the door and don't open it unless it's one of us. Are you listening to me?"

"Yes," she weakly mumbled as she watched her knight in shining armor dash back out the door.

Thomas leapt into action, trying to take down as many brawlers as he could, fighting his way back onto the stage. Somehow the fighting had spread everywhere. He ran back onto the stage, helping Kin by throwing off a crazy woman hanging off his back.

The crash of glass and furniture being broken made Yuuki's heart jump. She scurried up from the couch and locked the door.

-----------------------------

Tsukushi couldn't believe what was happening before her eyes. It would take too long for the cops to get there. She had to think of something fast. The guys didn't look like they could keep up much longer. Her hair had been torn down and hung loosely around her body with a few strands sticking to her arms and face. Sweat dripped off her body at the suffocating confinement of so many moving bodies.

There was only one option to get their attention, and that was to distract all of them from their fighting and destruction. Without a second thought, she set out to work. She crouched onto the counter, and pulled out random bottles, yanking off the snifters. Not even taking a second thought, she emptied out the contents onto the counters, running from one end to the other, leaving behind thick trails of alcohol. Another set of bodies slammed into the counter, nearly knocking her over with the impact of their force.

"Fuck!"

Along the side, she noticed a guy nonchalantly leaning against the corner of the bar, smoking his cigarette like nothing was happening around him. He seemed to be enjoying a good smoke and a show.

"Give me that"! Tsukushi screamed, yanking the smoldering abomination from his mouth. She hacked at the rather small billow of smoke surrounding him. "Don't you know these things will kill you?!"

She ignored his sputtered protests, and looked up to the ceiling above her. It was a risk considering the already weighted down web of metal grid above. It was meant purely for holding the wine glasses and display, but she took the chance anyway. She flicked the lit cigarette from her hands, and jumped up in the air pulling herself up with her arms and hanging from the precarious structure. The counter below her erupted in an explosion of flames, quickly spreading over the entire surface.

The crowd looked on, wondering what was the meaning of this. It was answered a few moments later when the siren blew and the sprinkler system went on. Slowly each nozzle activated, spouting down a cascade of water onto the overheated crowd. Within minutes, the occupants were doused, absolving them all of their blind destructive paths.

There must be something about water or something, but people cleared out of the club faster than anything as if their lives depended on it. Was there something about getting your face pounded in that seemed far better than being soaked by a little water? Whatever it was, it worked. Suddenly the emergency exit doors were thrust open as the crowd fought to get out.

In her small moment of thought, she failed to realize the extent to which the flames had ignited. The mixture of alcohol and fire refused to be extinguished by a few sprinklings of water.

"Tsukushi!" Akira's voice screamed from across the room.

Her arms began to ache from having to support her own weight. She did work out once in a while, but having to hold herself up for so long was beginning to take its toll. The water being sprayed in all directions didn't help much either, considering the sensation of her fingers slipping. The fall into the fire wouldn't be the thing to hurt, considering her own drenched state, but it would be the fall onto the slippery counter that would hurt. The still raging flames were quite the problem added on to her precarious situation.

Just hold on a little bit longer.

She gritted her teeth, fighting to stop her fingers from slipping. With each passing second, she could feel the cold wet metal clenched by her hands reject her. "Ah!" she screamed.

From nowhere, she felt something hard rush up and knock her over in mid air. A pair of arms wrapped around her, pulling her out of the course of her fall, but sending them both in a horizontal collision with the mirrored back wall of the bar. Her eyes were closed the entire time, and her mind still wondered why she had not fallen into the fiery flames that raged below her moments ago. The wind was knocked out of her lungs when she bore some of the brunt of the impact with the wall smacking into her. Even though she was on the outside of the impact she could still feel the tremors flow from her savior to her at the brute force of it all. Her eyes shot open immediately when a piece of glass shot past her face, skimming the skin of her cheek. The slight wet trickle of blood began to bleed out of the minor cut. When their tangled bodies met the ground, thousand of shards of glass surrounded them.

Some could have seen the image as eerily beautiful. Two bodies intertwined, lying in a bed of broken glass, reflecting the glimmers of the rainbow lights shining down on them. The mixture of the dim nightclub with the few sprinkles of bright light made the perfect scene for the very essence of what partying was all about. Life was all around them, while the main focus was their half dead expressions, erratically heaving chests, and tightly closed eyes.

Tsukushi groaned as sensation of her surroundings came to her. Her head was pounding, and her body ached all over. In the distance she could hear voices screaming something, but she paid no heed to them. There was the crunching noise of feet grinding into the fallen glass. Somewhere far away, the muffled hum of sirens coming closer could be heard.

The pain was too much to ignore.

"Tsukushi! Tsukushi, wake up! Fuck! There's blood everywhere!" Akira's strained screams resonated.

Tsukasa pushed past the frazzled man, and picked her tiny body up, moving her to another spot on the ground. "Get them off the glass!" His hands lightly patted her cheek, trying to rouse her from her half dazed stupor. "Open your eyes, Tsukushi!" Desperately, when seeing no signs of her awakening, he shook her shoulder, not caring whether or not he was following the protocol medical procedures in situations like this. His rough hands were now coated with her warm blood flowing out of a long cut down her left shoulder blade.

Soujiro viciously continued pummeling any who got in his way, venting out his fury and frustration at what had happened to his friends. Images of Yuuki being mauled on stage enflamed his taste for blood more. Even though he knew the cops were on their way with their sticks and guns, he would get a bit more blood on his hands before they came.

She could hear voices calling out her name, but no words would come from her mouth. It hurt. It hurt all over, and she couldn't figure out why. Her head remained in a fogged daze, trying to grasp her surroundings, but nothing seemed to connect. When she felt her body being lifted, it felt like a thousand needles being stabbed into her shoulder. The pain was unbearable, but only more so, due to the fact that she could not even vent out her pain. Her voice was out, as well as any coherency as the consuming black covered her.

Tsukasa still held her in his trembling arms, trying to get any reaction out of her. He felt her breaths become shallow, which made his heart race even more. "We have to get her to a hospital," he hissed to Akira.

Akira, who finally regained some of his senses, knelt down on the ground to help the other victim lying there. His body lay still on top of the broken glass, and a loud groan was heard from him.

"Is he okay?!" Tsukasa urgently asked. His ear was pressed over Tsukushi's chest, listening for her heartbeat.

Akira grabbed him by the shoulder, and rolled him over to reveal his face. Shock was evident at the sight of his face, and the blood trickling down it from the gash on the side of his forehead.

Why would he sacrifice himself for her?

-----------------------------------

A/N: I'm back and so is LR! I'm busily typing away at the next few chapters and will be updating once a month again. As for "Return to Me", that will be put on a break, although I never got to write as much as I wanted (blame it on writer's block). "Introspection" will be updated every two weeks or as I hope it will be. And other random new stories will be posted sometime as well.

BTW what's the deal with this new nfiction.com? Has anyone else checked this place out? It's the exact same layout as fanfiction.net. Ah well, I'm too lazy to post in multiple sites unless someone has a freaking awesome HYD site.

As always review, review, and maybe review some more.