Chapter 5: Reflection (Song by Unfinished Thought)

"I'm beginning to understand," Xoe whispered to the voices as she paced around her small apartment the next day, "what all of this is supposed to mean.

Good.

"I'm beginning to understand that I don't wait for them to do something bad to me, I take what they did wrong to me and shove it in their faces when I kill them, right?"

Yes, you just go ahead and kill them.

Kill them with what you got.

Xoe nodded. "So I can take someone else's pain from someone that gave them it and go back with it to the original source of pain?"

Yes.

Remember Roxie?

She's still in the hospital.

"I know." Xoe sighed. "I should go visit her."

Xoe took Charlie's old car and drove all the way to the hospital on the other end of town. She came to the hospital room. Roxie, a black and blue hamster, was her best friend that had been beaten and raped by a group of men that were in their thirties. Roxie was staring at the ceiling when Xoe walked to her. She was on an oxygen tank but could still talk.

"Roxie." Xoe's eyes filled with tears. "Are you doing alright?"

Roxie looked over at Xoe. "Yes, I am," she whispered as she smiled.

Xoe hugged her best friend. "I'm going to kill those men, you hear me?"

"What? I don't want you to get in-"

"Roxie, I haven't seen you in about three weeks because of a lot of the stuff that has been happening, but I've got to explain. I've killed five people in the last two weeks."

Roxie shrunk. "What?"

"It all started with Josh. Remember how I told you he cheated on me? Wellys, I got him and his new whore the present of death, and then Charlie was harrassing me, so I killed him, too, and then Anna told Jackie RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME that I was a serial killer now, so I had to kill them."

"Meh, I didn't like any of those people anyway." Roxie laughed.

"You're not mad at me, are you?"

"No, you're still my best friend, killer or not."

Xoe laughed. "That's why I'm going to kill those guys for you."

::I Am Becoming Aware Now::

::Of What They've Done To Me::

::I've Got Your Ordinary Disease::

"It seems like everything's a reflection," Xoe whispered as she drove down to the alley where Roxie had encountered the five men. "Everything seems to be like, 'You're going to kill a person the next day like the day before and the day before and et cetera, et cetera.' I feel weird doing this though..."

Xoe saw the five men. They each had dark gray fur and were somewhere in their thirties. She parked the car outside the alley and walked in. The men looked back at her.

"Where did that gallie come from?" one of the men muttered.

Xoe crossed her arms. "You guys hurt my best friend."

"Yeah...," another one mumbled. "...So?"

"So now I'm going to kill you for it."

The men broke out into laughter. Xoe clenched her teeth and fists.

"You can't kill us," one said.

"Yes, I can."

"How?"

"LIKE THIS!" Xoe shot out two 9-m.m.s from her belt and shot at them. They ducked and brought out their own guns.

"Kill one of us, and we'll kill you," another man shouted.

Xoe kept on firing. "I'm a serial killer, and I could care less!"

The men stopped shooting to break into laughter. Xoe glared directly at one and shot him in the throat. He doubled over and fell to the ground bleeding. She shot more shots at him until he was dead for sure.

"...You just killed him, you little girl!"

"Oh my God!"

Xoe rolled her eyes. She shot at another one's head, and he also fell to the ground dead. "C'mon, I need some sort of challenge!" Xoe screamed at them as she put the guns back into her belt.

The three remaining men set down their guns. Xoe brought out her knife and poised herself. She raced toward them with her knife pointed forward. Xoe ran directly into one of the men's hearts with the knife, and he fell to the ground screaming. The other two men stepped back with fear in their eyes.

"C'mon, don't let a teen scare ya!" Xoe yelled as she jumped into the air. She landed on one of the guys' shoulders and brought her knife down on his head. He also fell to the ground dead.

::Tomorrow Comes And Nothing Has Changed::

::Yesterday Was A Perfect Reflection Of Today::

"Please don't kill me," the last man said.

Xoe put away her knife. "Why not?"

"Don't you remember what you wanted to be when you were a young kid?"

"Yes, I do. I wanted to be the opposite I am. And you obviously are, too."

"How so?"

"You raped my best friend and then beat her."

"No, we didn't."

"Yes, you did."

"You must have got the wrong people." The man stared blankly at her.

Xoe paused. "Oh, sorry..." She sighed. "Guess I must have gotten confused-"

The man jumped out at her. He grabbed her arms and whispered, "No, you didn't confuse yourself with anyone else."

Xoe did not panic. "Ah. I'm glad and then again not."

The man was waiting for her to panic. He brought out his gun and pointed it to her head.

::Do You Remember Your Dreams?::

::Did They Ever Look Like This?::

"You're all you could have been," the man whispered to Xoe.

Xoe smiled. "And you, too. You can't be anything else either."

"Are you willing to admit-"

"Yes, I am." Xoe kept on smiling. "You think I'm too beautiful to kill, so you won't."

The man paused.

"See?"

"You have a mysterious beauty, miss," he whispered. "Almost makes you wonder what would happen if you had never seen it-"

"Before you died." Xoe wrenched free of his grip and pulled out her knife. She stabbed him in the throat. He fell back with blood falling upon Xoe onto the ground twitching. After a few minutes, he stopped twitching.

"You're welcome," Xoe whispered as she walked out of the alley.

As she was walking out and away, a black and red hamster got in her way. He whispered, "Xoe, I saw you kill them."

Xoe paused. "Jeff?"

"Yeah, it's me. I never thought I'd see you and your beauty again..." Jeff sighed grandly. "I remember I saw you last year at graduation, and you told me you never wanted to see me again because of how I misinterpreted you and your mind."

"Yeah, so now go away and leave me alone."

"Admit it, you knew you were going to be this, and you don't enjoy it."

Xoe clenched her fists. "Remember, I will kill you, too."

"Oh, please don't. I'm here to help you." He flashed his eyes. "But first you need to get cleaned up. Let's go to your place, shall we?"

Xoe nodded. "Sure."

::I Wish I Could Be There::

::As You Prepare Another Blank Stare::

::Not Willing To Admit::

::You're Already Become All You Could Have Been::

After Xoe had finished cleaning off all of the blood off of her, she and Jeff walked downtown.

"So, you learned what it felt like to be ashamed of yourself."

"What are you talking about, Jeff?"

"You never smile around people you don't like or when you're not killing someone. I mean, you didn't smile really that last one until the last came because you were flaming mad. You smiled when you killed Josh."

"How much you know scares me. Who have you told?"

"No one. I actually like your disposition."

"Don't try hitting on me."

"I'm not. I'm telling you the truth."

Xoe glanced over at Jeff. "You enjoy watching me kill?"

"Yes, that's why I watch."

"You fucking stalker..." Xoe hurried up her pace. "I gotta check on Roxie..." She then left him.

::There Was Time::

::When You Refused To Follow::

::Before You Learned The Beauty Of Shame::

::Before You Left Me Behind::

::To Drown In The Afterglow::

"You did? Just for me?" Roxie asked with building tears in her eyes.

Xoe nodded. "Yes, I did. I'm not sure if anyone has found them in that alley yet or not..."

"So what next?"

"You remember Jeff?"

"Yeah, that freak. Who can't?"

"I dunno... Wellys, he told me all this stuff like I smiled when I killed Josh, and I hadn't told anyone that... I think he's stalking me."

"Prolly is."

After about an hour, Xoe walked back into her apartment. She lied back on the bed and whispered, "Jeff prolly sees me right now." Xoe shuddered.

She glanced up at the ceiling. "I remember that look in his eyes when he was talking to me..." Xoe pasued. She could not remember the color of his eyes.

"How can I remember all of the looks and the colors of my victims' eyes and not even remember an old friend's eyes?"

::Somewhere Along The Line::

::Between When I Said Goodbye::

::And When I Realized::

::I Couldn't Remember The Color Of Your Eyes::

"I really suppose they're right. I did lose my ability to truly shine for everyone..." Xoe closed her eyes. "Maybe I can pull off something so no one will know like they do that I'm unhappy and kill people... I've killed ten people now..."

::I Lost The Ability To Truly Shine::

::I Tried To Smile For You::

::I Really Did::