Readers—I finished this, if only for you.

Recompense for Treachery

Chapter 8, "What's a Dream but a Dream?"

The sound of Soujiro making an odd half snort, half choke noise echoed in the complete and utter silence.

He cleared his throat once more in his sleep before he moved on the couch, his clothes rumpling and scratching against the fabric of the cushions, and his feet made a light bump against the wood of the couch's arm. He snorted again before it seemed he was done.

Tsukushi, however, didn't register anything of her friend's movements. Her wide, expressive brown eyes were focused completely on the man sitting in front of her, taking in every single characteristic of the person she had become so close to in the last five years. She traced his long nose, his dark lashes, his slightly glassy, clear ash-grey eyes, his pale brown hair, his casual jaw, his perfectly-shaped ears, his elegant neck, his wide, strong shoulders, and the rest of his lean, relaxed body. When she paused at his toes, her face rose back up to meet his with an expression that reminded him vaguely of a girl with all of her insides boiling in turmoil. With the insecurity of a calf on its first legs and the hesitance of a woman who had experienced far more than she should have, she creased her brow and hunched her shoulders.

"I... I don't know how..." Tsukushi's lips dried and she unconsciously drew her tongue across them, immediately drawing Rui's eyes, "how I feel about you." She finally let her eyes rest on his, awaiting judgment.

She had grown so much since high school it was almost painful. And he had seen every part of it: the first time she kissed Tsukasa, rather than him kissing her, the first time she had moved in with Tsukasa, the first time she had gotten drunk, the first time she had gone to university, the first time she had given herself away--that one had been obvious, no one had to tell Rui about it, he could tell just by looking at her--and then her first real, true break-up. But then, right at that moment, Rui found himself fixated on nothing but the girl sitting beside him like the big fish that got away. He had had his chance with her so long before, but had blown it, and he knew he would never have another chance unless he could tell her, only for the second time in his life, the various, overwhelming desires for her that had been pushed to the farthest corners of his heart until he could bear it no longer. He wanted see every spark of life in her, to witness every excited moment, to hold her whenever she could no longer stand on her own, and finally have her as much as she did him.

So he let his arm extend towards her, his hand cup her cheek, his fingers brush across her light, soft skin, and he allowed himself one sip of her surprised brown eyes before taking her lips against his own. They were slack and pliant from the unexpected maneuver and Rui could do no less than take full advantage. Some part of his mind begged silently his two unconscious friends to not wake up while the other part pressed his mouth firmly and with all his exploding, pent-up passion against hers, so soft and warm and moist beneath him. His hand traveled up from her heated cheek to her locks of smooth, long, brown hair where his fingers tangled in each individual strand, and he was comforted.

She responded.

Her body seemed to go limp, for her lips grasped onto his but still released--like a drowning girl--and he had to release his tantalizing grasp to support her with both hands. He let his eyes flick open briefly before his arms went from slack at her sides to wrapping tightly around her, and he allowed his fingers to briefly trace the line of her hip before his vision of her low-lidded brown eyes, ruddy cheeks and puckered lips was cut off when he drew her into another desperate kiss.

Rui never expected to feel both of Tsukushi's hands press against his chest, trace up to his shoulders, and twine around his neck to pull him closer. But it was welcome and he quickly adapted, so her body was pressed into him and his tight grip absorbed her from all sides. When his assault on her tender mouth became stronger and more feverish he felt his body begin to grow warm and parts of him begin to hunger in ways he had rarely let himself hunger: he had waited for years, for five years, and now he had her.

But then an ugly beast reared its head--how, exactly, did she feel about him? Rui suddenly drew back from their passionate kiss and she opened a pair of slightly glazed, confused eyes, then blinked at him. Her face was flushed prettily, with bits of pink staining her cheeks and her lips pursing unconsciously. He gulped and pushed back some of her hair so he could see all of her pale face. Her brown eyes widened.

"Tsukushi... I can't... I mean, I don't know how you..." Tsukushi lightly pressed a finger against his lips to silence him. His nervousness quelled into a haze as she leaned forward, eyes closing, and kissed him. Reason abandoning him, Rui parted his lips from hers and mumbled quietly, "Let's go somewhere more... private." She could only nod silently as they left the two drunks sprawled uncomfortably in the living room and sought out space for themselves.

Rui held her hand tightly, as if afraid his dream would dissipate as rapidly as he had found it and she would float away. In the darkness his shaking fingers found the sliding panel doors of his bedroom and—oddly, they were already open, with a dim light shining through a window. Unable to ponder this he drew Tsukushi in behind him and she offered no protests when he led her to his bed and sat her on the edge.

When Rui encountered nothing but a calm smile and a pretty blush from Tsukushi, he wondered if she was in her right mind; but he remembered she tended not to drink alcohol. He felt her hand light on his and unable to resist any longer he enveloped her in a kiss, pressing her down onto the bed. Every emotion he had kept inside for a time so long he couldn't piece it together came boiling to the top as he lifted his head, staring into cloudy brown eyes. He had to remember to take it slow—as much as his desire to love her overwhelmed him—and give her the best experience possible. It seemed so difficult when she was pliant to every move he made: he removed her shirt and she returned the favor, kisses absorbing them both in between removing each article of clothing until they were both naked on the bed. Rui could hardly keep his head as they made the most incredible love of his mortal life.

The fact Tsukushi so readily accepted his advances should have concerned him, but he was too swept away in her to contemplate it.

Rui jolted awake as if he had never slept; but, low blood pressure in tact, he quickly fell back to his pillow and let out a yawn. He did jerk rather violently, though, when he tried to stretch and lightly bumped something or someone lying beside him.

When he saw Tsukushi curled up, sleeping beside him, Rui remembered the night before and blushed a little. He wondered what it would mean for them. Would she marry him? As well as he knew her, Rui hadn't been able to gauge any of her responses since he first asked her. It was all so strange... but he was happy and didn't mind it.

Slowly she awoke, and he laughed inwardly when she found herself tied up in his arms. She relaxed into him at first—and then with a start covered herself with the sheets, turning a bright shade of red and squeaking with alarm. Rui watched her with unveiled curiosity and concern when she nearly fell out of bed in her haste to stand up. His puzzlement turned to a frown when she stared at him and where she had been sleeping only minutes before with a wretched expression.

"We... last night... did...?" she blubbered. "Oh, no..."

"Tsukushi? What is it?" Rui slowly moved over to her side of the bed and looked intently at her. Tsukushi held her head and shook it.

"No, no," she moaned, "No, we couldn't have." She looked at him, eyes watering, and said, "We did, didn't we?"

Unsure of how to respond, as she was obviously in distress, Rui only nodded his head. This appeared to be the wrong answer when she burst into tears. "I can't believe it," she cried. "I can't, not at all, not at all." It was at that moment he remembered the day Tsukushi and Tsukasa broke up. It was a horrible incident, and afterwards she had naturally come crying to his door. She gave the whole story—and how it tore her up when she had given herself away to Tsukasa and been left mere weeks later. She had thought herself the thrown away toy. She experienced more pain that day than Rui thought was more than any person should have to in her entire life.

A strong grip took hold of his heart when Tsukushi sank to her knees and sobbed. Murmuring, "I'm sorry, Doumyouji," she only called him that when she missed him, when she was afraid, "I'm sorry, Junpei." As much as he hadn't expected to hear that name, it didn't surprise him.

He had known it was wrong to tell her. He knew it was wrong now to have done it.

As Tsukushi cried and Rui could do nothing—he woke up.

Blinking heavy lids Rui glanced around himself. His back felt cramped and his head burned and ached.

"Why are you awake?" he heard a familiar voice ask. Tsukushi sat beside him on the couch, flipping channels on the muted television. She seemed to have dragged it in from his bedroom and resorted to a number of extension cords to plug it in. Looking at the clock, he noted it was still around midnight. Tsukushi smiled at him the way she always did—as a friend, as a
loving friend. Rui could only smile back when she asked, "Are you all right? Your dream looked rather fronting." It had been, he thought with a frown.

Eventually, Rui had Tsukushi sleeping soundly in his bedroom after a few times she asked, "Are you all right? You went out like a light—I didn't expect anyone to wake up until at least noon tomorrow." He said he had merely been troubled and put her to bed. Now, he was crashed beside Soujiro, and he could ponder what his dream had told him. Tsukushi didn't love him, not the way he loved her. He would learn to live; he would have to find something else and let her alone. He resolved to wait some time more—though his heart pulled and it hurt.

The next day Tsukushi rose long before the three boys even began to stir. She had set Rui's alarm early enough that she could return home, fix herself up and be ready for her early class while still having a bit of space for a leisurely breakfast. She liked to plan with time to spare.

Sitting through economics, Tsukushi pondered her relationship with Junpei. With Doumyouji Tsukasa finally no longer a part of her life, she felt a space in her had gone empty—but it was a hole Junpei was already beginning to fill. To this she wasn't sure how to react but his advances were welcome and she found herself without a doubt that she would, and could, enjoy his company. It was with that resolve that she left school that afternoon to the small fish shop where they had arranged to meet before she left for work.

The bells jangled as Tsukushi walked into the small, dimly-lit eatery. Seeing Junpei's hand waving she passed the tables to where he sat, a pair of sunglasses on his head and a bright smile decorating his lips. "You look jolly," she noted as she took a seat across from him. Junpei chuckled with a deep voice.

"It feels like a good day today, doesn't it?" he asked. "The semester's ending, you can just feel it in your bones."

The pair chatted idly for some time, through drinks and overcooked fish. Tsukushi was least expecting it when Junpei asked, "Would you be interested in dating?" It was lucky she wasn't sipping her soda water or it might have gone up her nose.

"D-dating?" she asked. "Well... I thought we were. In a way." She looked slightly confused.

Junpei laughed then and patted her hand where it lay on the table. "I just meant that... Well, I really like you a lot, Makino-san." He kept his eyes meaningfully on hers. "And I know you're looking to finish at school this semester, so I hoped... I hoped that you might tell me what you're thinking." Tsukushi had to smile: he looked like so much to her, hopeful but strong in his own right. She admired his individualism.

"Oh, Junpei-kun, I do like you. What is it you're looking for?" she raised one eyebrow. Junpei cracked a smile and turned her palm over so he could twine his fingers with hers.

"Just to love."

Rui thought the story to be rather tiresome, now. He had first found it that way when he had to tell it to Tsubaki at a dinner. "Tsukushi took her degree and got an associate position for a broker. She and Oribe live outside the city so he can be closer to school, where he's staying for another year. When he graduates they plan to marry and leave in the spring." Tsukasa was one of the first to hear it; he had been rather white, fingers holding the table. Shigeru didn't bother to comfort him. Sakurako and Shigeru had followed it all from the beginning, both being rather close friends of Tsukushi herself. Akira and Soujiro had took it upon themselves to threaten Junpei with severe bodily harm if anything happened to go wrong.

Rui had watched with a little empathic pain when Doumyouji and Tsukushi shook hands at she and Junpei's wedding. He hadn't even been a guest—merely Shigeru's escort to the reception.

For himself, Rui had decided to flatly refuse every marriage "opportunity" presented to him. His father, the strict type, had been so overwhelmed by his son's earnest work in the company he allowed him a year; and two years; and five years. Finally the great Mr. Hanazawa had submitted. "Find whatever it is you're looking for," he had told Rui—annoyed, put off.

Tsukushi loved to work and worked to love. Junpei's acting career took off when he landed another cameo and ended up catching more eyes than anyone expected.

Tsukushi bought her parents a house. The day she did she called Shigeru and both girls, just girls, went there and had a commoner's dinner with sama and potatoes.

The End.