•Third Degree - Heritage, Pt. II •

I always thought I knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life. I always wanted to help people, but I never was much of a person to be right out on the forefront, instead I was always much more of a background person. The Sorting Hat even agreed, saying I would do great things by not always being out front. Then I noticed that I was about to graduate from Hogwarts. Those plans were shot to hell.

I don't know why, but I suddenly decided that for whatever reason, I would not be living up to my family name if I became just a Healer. Now, mind you, I have a passion for healing, but is it something that I want to be doing my entire life? I'm sure I could handle it for a while, but what if I got bored with it? For the past eighteen years of my life I have been used to a pretty hectic pace, first due to the life of my Auntie, and then with my studies at school, and then my role in the DA, and then the Order of the Phoenix.

Now my Auntie is the Minister of Magic, and I am starting to doubt if I even deserve to be where I am. Is the only reason I'm here is because Auntie is the Minister, or have I played any role in this myself? I look up at Harry, who is currently probably stewing in his thoughts, and know for a fact that he thinks I am here because of my own doings, but still I am not convinced. I really should go and get him in a few minutes, as it isn't good to let someone stew in their own thoughts for to long, but a few minutes alone surely won't hurt him. He needs 'his space' every so often. I also need to check to see if Auntie is here yet.

As I walk past the refreshment table I notice Hermione is sitting by herself in the corner. I find this most typical of her, as for all her knowledge of spells, her experience of custom and culture of the wizarding world is something that will always be a problem for her until she realizes she needs to 'loosen' up a bit more. This girl has the best opportunity of any witch in recent history to more closely connect the muggle and wizarding worlds, and I can't help but feel a combination of anger and sadness at her for all but wasting this opportunity by shielding herself with her books just so she doesn't experience failure. I count Hermione as one of my good friends, because if it wasn't for her than Harry would have fallen apart. She is his anchor, the one main constant in his life. But I also fear that she is letting opportunities slip away because she is so scared of failure. If she would just open herself a bit more, she could become one of the most celebrated witches that have ever lived...I can only hope she realizes soon what she is doing to herself.

I notice Mad-Eye Moody walking over to Professor Dumbledore. Mad-Eye certainly has always been a large topic of conversation in the Bones' house, even more so for his relationship with my Uncle and Grandparents. Moody reminds me greatly of those paintings by that one muggle Picasso. Not just because of the way his face looks, oh no, not at all. It's just how complex the man is. He is so dedicated to never letting evil triumph over good, that he has undergone and experienced so much in order to better the wizarding world, yet in the end no one seems to understand why he is the way he is. There's a reason that he's scared and disfigured, why he can't experience a single waking moment without feeling as if someone is coming up behind him. That reason is because he sacrificed his life in order to ensure that everyone around him could experience a normal life. His disfigurements and sacrifices serve as a reminder to everyone else how good they are, and that there must always be someone who ensures the safety, for if their wasn't, we would all end up like Mad-Eye.

And I'm going to end up like Mad-Eye if I do not find out what I want to do with my life sometime soon. My Auntie will personally see to it that I can't see straight for a week if I walk up to her and say, calm as a bee, "Oh, lovely weather isn't it? By the way I'm dropping out of the Healer Apprenticeship. Even think of going on a vacation to muggle America?" Yeah, if I did that my last name would certainly be appropriate due to the pile I'd soon become.

As I approach the fireplace, I notice a woman with long, flowing pink hair standing in front of it, observing Harry. The pink hair reminds me of a story Harry told me once, of the first time he met his 'personal bodyguards.' In particular he told me of a woman that became much like the older sister he never had, a Nymphadora...

"Tonks, right?" I ask her, hoping that I have the name right. This woman seems to be one that just screams 'position of power' and I do not want to trifle with that.

"Correctumundo," she replies, before giving me an odd look, causing me to feel slightly self-conscious, "I'm sorry, but I just can't place your face with a name..."

"Susan Bones," I reply, holding out my hand, as I see a whole myriad of thoughts going through the woman's head, before she responds with a slight amount of trepidation.

"You're Madame Bones' niece aren't you?" Tonks asks. I have to suppress a sigh before I answer. Am I always going to be just Madame Bones' niece, or am I ever going to be Madame Susan?

"Yes, she's my Auntie," I state, giving a smile that I know doesn't reach my eyes, "In fact; she should be getting here any moment now. That's, um, why I came over to the fireplace."

"Same here," Tonks says with what I assume is a disarming smile; it works, but just barely. I still can't help but feel in awe of the confidence this woman exudes, "I'm just waiting for my dear old mum and dad to get here."

We stand silent for a moment, but the silence in only vocal from my corner. My head is swimming with ten thousand thoughts. Maybe, just maybe, Merlin, this is my chance! A woman that exudes this much confidence must have known what she was doing from an early age! Maybe she can give me some-

"When you left Hogwarts did you immediately know what you wanted to do?" I blurt out, then stop, feeling totally embarrassed.

This doesn't seem to affect Tonks, who just stands thinking for a moment before replying, "Well, I always had wanted to be an Auror, but I wasn't entirely sure until I started 'boot camp' for the program some three months after I graduated, so I guess you could say that I didn't know immediately what I wanted to do for sure. Why do you ask?"

"I guess, well, with my Aunt being the new Minister, and the stories I've heard my entire life about how 'great' my family has been in fighting the Dark Lord," I pause for a quick breath, this really is my chance! "Well, I feel as if there is no way that I will ever be able to measure up to what's come before me."

I instantly regret what I say. Way to go Susan! Just when you think that you don't belong among these people, you go and prove it for the entire world to see. If this isn't sign enough, the greatest wizard before Harry walks past you as you say this. Just great, just great. just-

"Susan, I must say," Tonks starts, and I can almost feel the rebuff that is coming, "I have been having much of the same thoughts lately. My family has included Headmasters of Hogwarts, and all sorts of other important people, and what am I? Nothing but an Auror who wouldn't even be worth her space if she couldn't change her appearance at will, and even that is barely enough reason."

Are you KIDDING me? This woman who exudes so much confidence and poise...is worried about feeling lost in the history of her family as well? And she thinks she's NOTHING but an AUROR? Maybe I'm not as messed up as I have led myself to believe...

"Well, I don't know much about the Auror program," I begin, and I really do not know much, but misery loves company, doesn't it? "But from what my Auntie has told me, they only accept the best of the best to be in their program. So you obviously have to be a really good witch Tonks! You're a Metamorphmagus too, right? That makes you extra special then! You shouldn't be worrying at all! Auror's are some of the most well regarded group of people in the world! The fact that you are one should be enough to let anyone know that you are as good as, if not better, than those who came before you in your family!"

Tonks gives me a smile, and I can tell that while she's not totally convinced she has started to believe that she is worth more than she leads herself to be. Now only if I can believe that about myself. Not likely at this point.

"What about you Susan?" Tonks asks, interrupting my thoughts, "What are you thinking of doing?"

"I don't really know," I respond after a moment of thinking, this has been the one question that has been weighing heavily on my mind, "I am thinking about becoming a healer, but I'm not to sure if I would be able to handle that. After that, I don't know what else I could possibly do? I've spent the past two years of Hogwarts getting prepared to become a Healer, could I possibly do anything else?"

"Susan, I felt the same way when I left Hogwarts," she responds, and then gives me the single greatest piece of advice that I have ever received in my entire life, "You don't know until you actually start with any profession, so don't worry to hard about that. Besides, you need to be a highly skilled in many areas of magic to even get accepted into any Healing programs, so you are no doubt a very proficient witch, so you have nothing to worry about."

I start to give a smile as she continues on, "Besides, you seem to have already found someone that can help you out in any pursuit that you go into. What else can you hope for?"

Without immediately answering, I turn around and stare at Harry, who's deep in thought with Dumbledore...the two greatest wizards of modern history talking. My future talking with my worlds past...I suddenly have an epiphany. I do not need to worry about what I might be remembered for, I need to worry about doing what's right here, and right now. I need now more than ever to talk to Harry, "That's true...would you mind if you could watch for my Auntie for me?"

"Sure, I'm going to be waiting here anyway," she responds with a wink, "Go and talk to Harry."

"Thanks," I say with a small smile, and start to walk over to a living, breathing savior. Oh Harry, you may not want to acknowledge what you are, but you are the greatest wizard alive right now not only because of your magical prowess, of which you certainly possess in excess, but also in just the hope you have, and will give to, people. Including me. As I pass by what is undoubtedly the past, I can't help but smile as I approach the future, my future.

There will not be a tapestry long enough to cover what I plan to do.