The bed shook slightly, Buffy turned to see if Spike was still asleep. He was, sleeping soundly. She placed her hand on his chest and it started to rise and fall. She gasped and pulled her hand back. His chest stopped moving his. His body stopped using the unneeded breath. "Spike?" She whispered softly. Checking. No answer. "Spike?" She tried a little louder.

Buffy moved slightly resting her head on his shoulder. She reached out grabbed his arm pulling it across her waist. When she settled in his arms she closed her eyes and felt his grip around her tighten and he brought her closer to him.

She titled her head upward to make sure he was still asleep. His eyes were shut. She bowed her head again and closed her eyes. Letting one of her small hands sprawl ac across his chest. Latching on his shoulder.

Spike opened his eyes. Looking down at the blond in his arms. Same thing every night. It was killing him. To be so close to her, and not have her. To have her in his arms, and not hold her. His fingers ached to run threw her hair as it brushed his shoulder. They ached to run down her arm.

If my heart could beat it would break my chest

Buffy's heart rate started to quicken when she felt his grip on her loosen. Her hand unlatched from his shoulder, suddenly very awake. It swept over his nipple and down to his abs. Feeling out all the muscles underneath her fingertips. "Why can't…" She said softly.

You're scared, ashamed of what you feel, you can't tell the ones you love, you know they couldn't deal.

Spike felt a small puddle of water… no tears… on his shoulder. He looked down at her, confused. He could smell the sorrow, the anger rolling off of her like smoke. But there was something else there too, the slightest hint of it. Passion.

You know, you got a willing slave.

The words he'd sung to her, he knew exactly what he was singing. The words wouldn't stop coming from his lips that night. Couldn't trap or stop them. Now he sat in silence. His grip on his lover tightening as he cradled her to him.

I know I should go. But I follow you like a man possessed. There's a traitor here beneath my chest, it hurts me more then you've ever guessed. If my heart could beat it would break my chest.

He waited until her breath evened out he knew she was asleep. He leaned in and kissed her on top of the head softly. His head met the pillow again, his eyes drifting over his surroundings. The old dirty crypt. Sure it looked better then when he got it. the sheets he lay in with his lover, clean.

His eyes fell on the ceiling. He felt Buffy start to shake in his arms. She moaned. It was pain-filled moan. "Don't" Her soft plea filled the silence that invaded the crypt. "Please, don't…" She cried.

Spike looked down at her, "Love, shh, what is it?"

"S-spike?" Came her slurred response. "Please, Spike, I'm…" She said, "Don't."

Before he had a chance to say anything, green eyes met his. Her eyes burned with new tears. "Buffy-" She stopped him from continuing what ever he was going to say by punching him. "Bloody hell." He swore.

Buffy's eyes turned shocked scared.

"Buffy, what's wrong?" He asked tenderly.

Buffy felt trapped, "No, l-let me go." She begged pushing him off of her. She moved off of the bed throwing her clothes on.

Spike got up from the bed putting his pants on, "Buffy, please, love, tell me what happened." He begged standing in front of the shaking blond.

"I need to go." Buffy said shoving him out of her way. Walking down to the rabbit hole.

"Buffy!" Spike called jumping down after her.

When Buffy got out down to the floor section she grabbed her jacket and put her shoes on. She looked at Spike who just slipped into his boots. She rushed for the door but he was in front of her when she got there. Blocking her from the door. "Buffy…" He called softly.

Buffy looked at him, "Get out of my way, Spike."

"Will you just bloody tell me what's goin' on?" He pleaded.

Buffy stiffened, "Out of the way, now." She ordered.

Spike sucked in his cheeks. Shook his head. His eyes falling over her shaking form.

Buffy threw a shaky punch at him. He looked back at her, split lip. She shoved him out of the way and ran from the crypt.

Spike sighed watching her run. He looked down at the cold, hard floor and with out warning turned around and punched the wall. Leaving a fist mark in the rock. He pulled his hand out of the hole and looked down at his bloody knuckles. Laughing.

…

Spike sat on his chair sprawled out watching some movie. "So, you just don't come to the house anymore?" Dawn's voice called. Spike turned his head to see her standing at the door, looking at him.

"Bit? What are you doin' here?" He asked standing.

"Just coming to see you, since you can't find time in your busy schedule to see me anymore." She spat coldly. "What's taking up your time now?" she looked at the TV, "Right, South Park, much more important then me."

Spike sighed, he just couldn't win when it came to the bloody Summers' women. "What happened bit?" He asked concern in his voice.

"I missed you." She explained, softening.

"Sorry I haven't been around." He apologized.

"Is… is it because of Buffy?" Dawn asked in a small voice.

"Part of it, not because I've got anything against big sis, pet, jus' you don't need me bein' big brother now that she's… back." Spike told her,

"But… it's not really like she's back. She's been gone." Dawn explained, "It's like she wont even look at me anymore."

She'd even been spending less time with him; sure she'd been there for a few hours. But instead of staying a while afterwards she'd take off. She'd gotten even colder.

"IT's like she doesn't… she doesn't love me anymore."

Spike's head shot up, "Don't you say that." He said, "OF course she loves you, she's just going threw a hard time right now." Spike explained. "She does love you, more then anything."

"Then… then why is she like that?"

"She was in heaven, nib, she just needs time to… get back to her old Slayer self."

"Can I stay here tonight?" Dawn asked in a small voice, "Please? I never get any sleep at home, I used to sleep here all the time!" She reminds him.

Spike nodded, "Fine, go change into some night clothes. I'll go call the witches." He told her, Dawn nodded and ran into his room. Spike sighed, the nearest payphone was only a few feet away so he would be able to keep an eye on the crypt to make sure no baddies got in with his niblet in there.

TBc…

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