Disclaimer: Okay, I know this should have gone at the beginning, but I forgot. Sorry, none of these characters are mine (except Elizabeth...I own her! He He) so don't sure…please.

Sunrise over the tango factory's A/N: I sincerely hope that I have had you ripping your hair out in annoyance at me not telling you what Rimmer's 'plan' is. I've done this for a reason…I was bored…and I'd like to see if any of you knew what was coming. I'd like to say thanks to all those who are reading and reviewing for the lovely comments you make.
Thanks to Raging tree trunk who has sat through my ramblings and has given me tonnes and tonnes of help and has actually wrote a bit for this chappie too and also 'big up' to other bessie mate Nic, who phoned up for a chat and we got talking about our creative works (hers is slightly longer then mine, only by a couple of hundred pages…one day I will catch up), and no doubt she'll read this, and come in school turn to me and say 'you're mad!' GO NIC!

With Starbug fixed and ready to go, time was against Rimmer but fortunately Elizabeth had come to bid him goodbye…with perhaps more enthusiasm then necessary.

Cat nodded over to where Rimmer and Elizabeth were locked in a very passionate kiss that was getting more and more raunchy with each passing second, "I don't get it," he said, turning to face Lister.

"What's not to get?"

"Well this Elizabeth, she looks like a smart, respectful, thoughtful, beautiful young woman…"

Lister nodded "and?"

"Why the hell does she give all her affections to Hologram Henry over there, when there are much more striking individuals in desperate need of some lovin'!"

Lister smirked "like you?"

"Yeah" nodded the Cat, thrilled he was making his point "now why in God's name is that women still over there, with her tongue down" he paused to shudder "Rimmer's throat when I'm stood over here, looking my most handsome…clearly with a lot of time on my hands! I mean, WHY? I'm drop dead gorgeous, he isn't, so why's he getting all the action?"

Lister sighed, "Cat, you can love someone just for their personality, not just for their looks…"

Cat laughed "you crack me up sometimes, Buddy…'loving someone for their personality'…that's the best thing I've heard all year" He patted Lister, who was staring at Cat very bewildered, on the shoulder "you really know how to cheer me up!" he grinned walking off.

"Any time…" smiled Lister, still wondering what the hell was going on.

Meanwhile Rimmer and Elizabeth were still desperately trying to say goodbye, but each time one of them attempted it, the other felt it was time for another kiss or a quick cuddle.

"You can still come with me," said Rimmer softly, stroking Elizabeth's face "it's not to late to say yes..."

Elizabeth shook her head sadly "I've got my work here, Arnold…plus i'm going to be very busy from now on."

Rimmer beamed at her "I'll think about you all the time, I'll never forget you"

"Rimmer man" shouted Lister "i'm not tellin' you again WE'VE GOT TO GO!"

Rimmer pulled a face at Elizabeth "annoying smeg head..." he muttered, making her laugh. "I guess this is goodbye then" he said, pulling her into a hug.

"Yeah, I suppose it is...now go before I get you into trouble" she said nudging him away.

"One more kiss?" he begged.

Elizabeth placed her hands on her hips, and pretended to be annoyed "oh for heavens sake, Arnold!" She said,

Rimmer took that as a 'yes' and took hold of Elizabeth spun her round and lowered her to floor, and kissed her like they do in old movies.

The only thing spoiling the moment was Lister shouting over to them "RIMMER, WHAT PART OF 'WE HAVE GOT TO GO' DID YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? C'MON RIGHT NOW, PUT THAT GIRL DOWN, SHORTEN YOUR OVER ACTIVE LIBIDO AND GET YOUR ARSE IN HERE…PRONTO...BEFORE I GET REALLY MAD!"

Rimmer rolled his eyes "sorry Elizabeth" he sighed, "I've got to go, my mums' calling…"

"I heard that!" yelled Lister.

"You were meant to!" Rimmer shouted back, "he's an okay sort of guy really" he said, turning back to a giggling Elizabeth "then he wakes up…" Rimmer suddenly went very serious "I'll always love you, you know that…don't you?" he said,

Elizabeth blushed "of course"

"Even if I'm locked in a incredibly small sauna with all the universes glamour modelswith pert round bottoms, and amazing breasts that defy the laws of gravity and killer legs- and hips that wiggle in the most intriguing way who've just come from a 'G-string' fashion show and they're all mad with desire and I'm the only person they could vent it on…I'd say no…because I'd rather it would be you ripping my clothes off in a erotic, lust fuelled frenzy"

Elizabeth stared at him "thanks" she said uncertainly "that's very sweet…in a strange way. Now go on, get out of here before your mum has a go at me for wasting time!"

Somehow, Rimmer was torn from Elizabeth's embrace by a severely pissed off Lister, he had vowed to try and be sincere, but the whole 'mum' thing had thrown him over the edge. The moment the doors of Sarbug slid into place, Rimmer raced to the cockpit, and waved to Elizabeth, he was still waving at the spacecraft took off, and when he couldn't see Elizabeth's figure any more, his waving was replaced by tears.

Code 5263 section 4-1B: When new personnel's undertake membership of the mining vessel corps Red Dwarf, and its sister ships White Giant and Gas Star, personnel must volunteer vital medical information for their own personal health and quarantine regulations.

Samples include: blood, hair, nails, dental records, fingerprints, genetic "fingerprints", detailed records of birthmarks/freckles/tattoos, family medical history, and detailed accurate reports of contact with species other that human.

Finally sex cell records must be kept. Specifically sperm from men and an egg from women- should circumstances arrive in which they need to be used.

All these samples will then be converted into digital format and installed into all JMC mining ship computers (including transport vehicle computers Blue Midget and Starbug) meaning the samples will be easily accessible for medical emergencies whether it is on the JMC ship or one of her transport vehicles.

At first when Rimmer had read this in the 'Welcome to the JMC' he'd thought that rule was ludicrous, when would a medical emergency arise when you desperately needed a sperm sample? He'd now changed his mind, saying if he ever met they guy who'd made that code he'd kiss him!

You see that was Rimmer's plan: he'd download (or was it upload, he never could remember...) his sperm sample back into it's original form, and give it to Elizabeth... not as some sick, morbid present but so she could then have In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)...to put it simply Elizabeth would have his child.